Chapter 12: You Run Into a Lot of People During a Chase
Lia: Thank you so much for reviewing! I'm really happy you found the chapter funny and I was a bit relieved too. And yep, there's going to be a chase, and I hope I've done justice to it! Thank you too for reading, and I hope you like this chapter too!
Mellize: Thank you so much for reviewing and I was really delighted to know that you enjoyed the Okikagu interactions. You're one of my favorite authors too, and such a compliment truly means a lot! I hope this chapter meets your expectations. And by the way, I rather like your new username, it's pretty charming!
nathan19bane: Thank you a lot for reviewing! I'm truly pleased to know that you found it amusing! Please do stay up to the ending; I swear I'll make it worthwhile! Hope you like this chapter too!
Putxi: Thank you again, for the review! I wholeheartedly share your love for the Yorozuya, aren't they awesomely unique? I hope you enjoy this chapter too, and thank you once more for everything!
Now, with lots of gratitude to everyone for waiting, let's move on to the story!
Seconds after the Shinsengumi appeared in the city, Gin, Kagura, Zura and Shinpachi were flattened against the nearest wall in a desperate attempt to avoid getting caught by the police. Zura looked gravely puzzled, wondering aloud," Speak of the devil! What are the Shinsengumi doing here?! I was sure they weren't tracking me…"
"It's not you they are after, Zura, it's me! That damned Sadist, he actually sent those tax robbers to search for me!"
"Hey, royal brat, you said you wanted to have some fun? So how about a chase throughout the city? Let's give Oogushi kun a run for his money, shall we?"
Kagura stared at Gin, looking amazed before giving him a huge grin. She cheered and nodded," That will be fun, yes! I haven't had an escapade since ages! Let's show those tax robbers and the jerks leading them how incapable they are!"
"That is exactly the attitude of a true leader! Let's move towards the goal ahead of us, with all of our might!"
All of Shinpachi's yelling was lost in the air as they hurtled out of the alley, even as the Shinsengumi officers immediately began to chase after them. The human wearing glasses could only run behind the three idiots, and hope that his sister would never come to hear of it.
Hijikata chewed his cigarette in irritation and anger as he spotted three highly recognizable figures dashing away. One was obviously the princess, with her red hair and purple parasol, the other was just as clearly the good for nothing Yorozuya boss, with that silver perm, and the other, it seemed very, very much like the wanted terrorist Katsura. But that couldn't be, right? There was no way that the princess of Edo would tag along with someone who wanted to overthrow her very husband, right? Hijikata nearly slapped himself; with this particular princess, anything was possible. And whether he liked it or not, Sougo had issued orders that the princess be brought back within an hour, and accordingly, Hijikata ordered his men to give chase, as fast as they could, if they did not want to commit seppuku.
The trio ran for quite a distance before Katsura pulled up before a certain 'bar'. Kagura stared at the sign in utter surprise, not knowing in the least what to expect next. Gin felt like permanently kicking his old friend off the face of the earth, and Shinpachi abandoned any attempt at straight manning. The reason? It was the bar run by none other than Mademoiselle Saigou. In other words, the transvestite or okama bar.
"Gintoki, this is the perfect place to conceal ourselves! The Shinsengumi will never guess our true identity!"
"ARE YOU BONKERS, ZURA?! I AIN'T DRESSING UP AS A WOMAN AGAIN!"
"I didn't think you were transvestites, Gin chan, Zura. Are you one too, Shinpachi? No, forget it; glasses don't really have a gender, yes?"
"I'M NOT A GLASSES OR A TRANSVESTITE! Why don't I ever get any respect?!"
Suddenly, the owner of the bar grabbed Gin and Zura by their heads, exclaiming good humouredly, "Paako, Zurako, long times no see! Now why don't ya get dressed up an' have a drink with us ladies?!"
Minutes later, when the Shinsengumi passed by, searching every location frantically, they saw two new okama swaying clumsily to the music while the other spectators applauded and laughed heartily. One had extremely curly silver hair, and the other had black hair as beautiful as a noblewoman's. Promptly deciding that they would definitely not find their targets there, they ran away at once before the drunken revelers spotted them.
"See, Gintoki? It was truly a marvelous plan."
"Oi, Gin chan, Zura, dance more gracefully! Sway your hips, ha ha ha!"
"It's not Zura, it's Katsura!"
"Oogushi kun, I'm going to be taking your annual salary, for the rest of your life as payment for all this."
"The only thing marvelous here is your idiocy. I won't even try to be the straight man anymore."
After half an hour or so, Gin finally managed to escape from the terrifying grip of Mademoiselle Saigou and lost no time in dragging out Kagura and Shinpachi along with him. The three of them sped down the roads again, with only Shinpachi feeling a little guilty about deserting Zura. They were headed in the direction of the Yorozuya office, because Gin had decided that he had to have a drink of strawberry milk, that too at once. It was a craving, he explained, that couldn't be appreciated by youngsters.
But when they got there, the first thing they saw was an old lady, with graying hair, but none the less fearsome for that as she pointed a broom at Gin, yelling," WHEN THE HELL ARE YOU GOING TO PAY THIS MONTH'S RENT, YOU USELESS SILVER PERM?!"
Within seconds, they were running as fast as they could in the opposite direction, Kagura exclaiming, "Gin chan, just who was that scary monster? "
"That was the terror known as my landlady, Otose! Now run as fast as you can, before she gets us and sucks our lives out of us!"
"I'M GOING TO THROW OUT ALL YOUR JUMP MAGAZINES IF YOU DON'T GET BACK HERE AT ONCE!"
Gin stopped immediately, horror struck. Shinpachi face palmed as his boss ran back to his landlady, begging her not to throw out his most beloved possessions. Kagura followed after him as if she had already got used to it, and mentally made a note to add strawberry parfaits to all the list of stuff she was going to send Toshi to buy. With his own money, of course.
They were soon seated at the counter of the bar, after Kagura had explained that the pending rent would be paid soon enough, and had given the old lady a personal assurance. Shinpachi could only pity the Shinsengumi Vice commander; he really had no idea of the bleeding he would soon be put through. Well, perhaps that was only appropriate for tax robbers, as Gin san said later. Otose served them drinks; strawberry milk for Gin along with orange juice for Kagura and Shinpachi and they soon struck up a conversation.
"So, you're the princess of this country, and you're exploring the city? This is indeed the first time I've heard of a royal doing something like that. It's probably because of the bad influence of this silver perm idiot…"
"OI, who're you calling a silver perm idiot?! And I am not a bad influence either!"
"Gin san, I think you've no right to say that after all the things you just taught her. Defaulting bills, dancing in a bar and not paying rent are not examples of a good influence, no matter how you look at it."
"You're really going to hear it from the prince, fool. I suppose it's because of you guys that the Shinsengumi is practically raiding the city?"
"Well, blame the sadist for that! He was the one who locked me up in a tower because I put laxatives in his dinner! I had to escape, so it's his fault for compelling a sweet princess like me to commit such a reckless act, uh huh." Otose merely raised her eyebrows as the 'sweet' princess ruthlessly slammed Gin and Shinpachi's heads into the floor for rolling their eyes and coughing disbelievingly at her claim.
"Well, that might be, but why don't ya go back now? Kabuki ain't safe for ya, princess. Besides, I should think your husband would have learnt something by now. Or do you hate the palace?"
"No, no, I love the palace! It's my home, yes? And it's not like I really 'hate'that Sadist either…. But the jerk always provokes and insults me, and I get a weird feeling in my stomach every time I go near him, uh huh. And he'll only tease me more if I tell him…."
"Looks like you've really fallen for the guy… girl, I may be an old granny, but let me give you some advice; if you want to knock sense into a man, you've got to beat it into him. Avoiding him won't help you any."
Just as Kagura was about to protest that there was no way that she had fallen for the said sadist, there was a loud knock on the doors of the bar. A voice, familiar to all of them called out," We're looking for princess and also that bastard Yorozuya! Turn them in immediately if they are inside!"
Otose sighed exasperatedly, before looking at the trio. She had to wait but little for the answer as they sprang up and tiptoed as quietly and quickly as they could towards the back doors, hurtling out at top speed even as the demon vice commander of the Shinsengumi slammed open the door.
"That's really rude manners you police have got there, barging into a bar by breaking down the door. If you are looking for a bunch of idiots then you can leave now; they aren't here."
The next place they landed up at was a bridge, a relatively normal spot compared to their previous destinations that day. Kagura wondered whether they were going to have a bit of peace for a moment; not that she minded either way. However, it seemed that peace had cut off all ties with them or disaster had just become great friends with them. For, at that very moment, a loud whirr, crack and crash sounded in their ears. In a flash of steel, hot air and bricks, they all found themselves falling through thin air. A large spaceship had crashed right into the river, destroying most of the houses on the riverbanks and snapping the bridge itself. Kagura regretted every second of her adventurous plan as she plummeted to what was surely going to be her demise…
Or maybe not. Even though she was soaked from head to toe, her clothes dripping with mud, and her body ached all over due to the fall, she was still alive. And so were Gin chan and Shinpachi, because she could definitely hear them yelling. Deciding to murder the person who was driving the damned spaceship, she pushed herself out of the reeds and mud and walked towards the noise. Seriously, she wondered, whoever had such an annoying laugh?
"Ahahaha, Kintoki, I'm sorry! I had no idea that we were about ta crash into a bridge! Ahahaha, Mutsu, why didn't ya tell me?"
"Because you were too busy puking, Sakamoto. Next time this happens, I'm kicking you out; the Kaientai can function better without an idiot captain like you."
A tall man, with a brown perm that rivaled Gin-chan's was laughing apologetically, even as the light haired woman next to him muttered death threats. Gin chan had begun arguing with the guy, yelling something about remembering his name correctly and driving like a madman. But it was the woman who surprised Kagura. She racked her brains, trying to recall her stern, but familiar face, when it all came back to her. It was her favorite cousin, quite distantly linked by blood, but they had always had a surprising connection with each other.
"Mucchan, it's really been a long time, yes?! Do you remember me?"
"What a surprise, Kagura. I do remember; it is impossible to forget you. It's good to see you again, though I'm sorry that you look a total mess because of this useless jerk and his idiocy."
Kagura grinned happily at that, all anger evaporating as she skipped towards the older woman. The icy Vice captain of the Kaientai smiled warmly and allowed Kagura to hug her, despite getting covered with mud herself, even as the men looked on in complete surprise.
"Ahahaha, seems like they know each other. Kintoki, ya didn't tell me about yer new friend!"
"My name is Gintoki, dammit! That brat is the princess of Edo and do you have any freaking idea what would have happened to me if she got injured?"
"But I didn't know that you'd be here! Oh, right, I didn't even know that we had entered Earth, ahahaha! Guess I got a little too wasted…"
"Sakamoto san, exactly how can you not know if you have entered a new planet or not?!"
Meanwhile, Kagura and Mutsu were having a small chat, telling each other of all the stuff they had done recently and how insufferable the men around them were. Kagura cheered up a lot on hearing Mutsu complain about Sakamoto, figuring that at least the Sadist didn't dump all his work on her or run away to drink every time and compel the others to pick him up. He was definitely an insufferable, sadistic jerk, but sure, he was rather lovable and entertaining sometimes….
Kagura immediately changed her thoughts as she heard a bazooka fire, the bullet narrowly missing them. Even without turning back, she knew that the sadist had come after her, armed with his biggest bazooka and probably a lot of other torture weapons. Quickly bidding farewell to her cousin, she, Gin, and Shinpachi began to run again. Her only thought, as she ducked another missile was, No, no, cross out everything I said earlier. He's truly the worst guy in the whole world!
Sougo's eyes sparked with anger and annoyance. After a really long and tiring search throughout the city (all he had done was order the others around), he had finally managed to find his China, and now she was running away from him, that too with the idiotic Yorozuya. Did she really prefer their company to him? Well, there was no way he was going to let that pass. Aiming precisely, he fired several shots of his bazooka, but she dodged them all, moving as gracefully as a deer. Suddenly, a small ball landed at his feet, bursting into thick white smoke, completely obscuring his vision. He could hear Hijikata yelling next to him, but all he really bothered about was that he had lost sight of her.
Kagura muffled a surprised exclamation as Gin grabbed her collar and pulled her into a tiny warehouse on the riverbank, along with Shinpachi. Just as she was about to begin shouting at him, she noticed Zura, still dressed up as a woman, waiting for them inside it.
"Zura, what are you doing here? What is going on? Weren't you supposed to be at the bar, yes?"
"Leader, it's not Zura, it's Katsura! I've thrown a smoke bomb which will throw off your pursuers, so you need not worry about them now."
"Oi, you never told me that your husband liked destroying stuff with a bazooka so much! Gin chan's precious silver perm was about to be singed black, you know that?!"
"I thought you'd already know how crazy that idiot is, Gin chan. That jerk is the ruler, yes?"
"Gin san, you really never read the newspapers, do you?"
"Jump is all that I need to read, Patsuan!"
"I truly give up on you Gin san…. But that doesn't really matter now. You do realize, don't you, Kagura san, that this escapade is putting the entire city into a lot of trouble? We understand if you don't want to go back, but…"
"Of course I get it, Megane. I'm truly a brilliant princess, uh huh. But, for the first time, maybe you're right; I do have to go back. Even though it was real fun today, I need to get back home and put the jerk in his place, yes? But, let's do this again, yes?"
"You got it, royal brat. Just don't forget to send me Oogushi kun's salary as payment."
"Leader, we shall overthrow this system together! I look forward to our great plans in the future! Till then, good luck!"
"Katsura san, please don't convert the princess into a Joui rebel. Honestly, you two have already taught her enough 'stuff'… I will also look forward to our next meeting, Kagura san. Please do not hesitate to ask us, the Yorozuya for help if you ever need anything!"
The princess grinned really wide, before exiting the warehouse confidently. They could hear her yelling," Hey, stupid sadist! Put away that bazooka and get down from Sadaharu! Sadaharu, we're going home, come on!"
"Well, it sure was one exciting day."
The next morning, at the royal palace,
Sougo sipped his coffee with pursed lips. The moment they had got back the last day, Totsuan had pointed a cannon at him and ordered him to repeal the royal decree at once. Apparently, his beloved daughter had gone off on a date while he was distracted with the search.
But a tiny smile graced his lips as he watched Kagura gobble down the breakfast, smiling happily and go about doing all the crazy stuff she did every day. He mentally resolved that watching her fool around, her face gleaming, was far better that shutting her up in a tower just so that he could derive sadistic pleasure from her upset and angry face.
Did i just think of being less sadistic? Looks like I'm really going crazy now…
Kagura turned abruptly and walked up to Hijikata, as if she had just remembered something.
What the hell does she have to say to that Mayora? And why is she smiling so happily?
" Mayora, here are the bills for the lunch, Gin chan's rent, the newest edition of Jump, strawberry parfaits, Zura's bombs, sukonbu, repairs, orange juice and the reward for the job. Please go and pay them all, with your salary. Refuse, and I will tell Tama to throw out all the mayo stored in the basement, uh huh."
It looks like she's really as sadistic as me. China, you really won over my heart by that amazing act. Well, if it's for you, then I guess I can be a little less sadistic then, though just for this month.
A/N: So there ends the twelfth chapter! I'm very, very sorry for updating so late; I had a couple of exams going on. But they went pretty well, though they won't be over till March. Thanks a lot to everyone for reading this story; it means a huge lot to me. Also thank you for waiting, I really feel a bit upset about that… But I hope you enjoyed this chapter!
Please take some time out to review and send me suggestions for improvement too; I love to know what you think of it. As always, follows, favorites, reviews, constructive criticism and anything else are very, very, much appreciated!