This fic will forever remain in the Gen category, but that doesn't mean I won't mention romantic-ish things at all. Especially Ann crushing hard on people. Also, Hancock's delusions totally count as romance, right? Right? (flailing)

To make things easier for everybody (including myself):

Ann and Ace's birthday: January 1st

Sabo's: March 20th

Luffy's: May 5th

Fic timeline:

Ace/Ann:6, Sabo: 5 –from chapter (4 to the end of chapter 6). During chapter 8, the trio is 6, Luffy is 2y10m.

The Red Hair Pirates's first visit is around May, so their ages are as follows: Ann/Ace/Sabo: 9, Luffy: 6

The last visit happens around June of the next year: Ann/Ace/Sabo: 10, Luffy: 7.

The recipe (created by a person named Anne!):

apronstringsblog dot com/savory-summer-porridge-bacon-sharp-cheddar-fresh-tomatoes-and-chives

000

-Red, red everywhere-

Send news from that corner of the world.

Tell me, who stayed?

000

"Welcome to Party's Bar. What would you like to order?"

"Huh? Who said that?"

"Captain, look down."

Shanks looked at the beer bottles in the counter. At me. At the bottles. "Benn, what's a little boy doing inside the bar?"

I raised one eyebrow, pointedly looking at the order pad and pencil in my hands. Inside, though, I was almost hyperventilating.

"I do believe she is the waitress." Said the newly-identified Benn, who also raised an eyebrow. Whether he was doubtful of a kid handling a bar or his captain's obliviousness wasn't really clear, though.

"But why is she so young? What happened to hot babes working in bars?" Shanks kneeled on the floor in an exaggerated show of distress.

"Would you like to come back in ten years?" I asked in a deadpan—the only other tone of voice I could manage besides 'squealing fangirl' right then.

"Haha, the little miss is not impressed, captain!" said a man with dreadlocks. Oh gods, Yasopp?

"Anyway, feel free to choose whatever table you prefer!" Oh gods, had my pitch just risen in the end?

"Hear that, crew? Come in!" Oh gods, oh gods, oh gods, so many customers!

With those words, the bar was flooded by the most varied group of people I'd ever seen, surpassing even anime conventions in their outfits and weapons (and the fact, you know, they were actually real). This crowd, after years living in Dawn Island, was scary.

"I think I'll need to get the tables from the storeroom…" I mumbled dazedly. Seeing the black spikes of hair peeking from the counter, I shouted, "Ace! Go get the extra tables! Sabo, Luffy! You come here and help me!"

After a few minutes of running from side to side with gallons of alcohol, I decided to put crates of beer (a Windmill Specialty!) and Rum near each table—since Makino kept track of everything in stock, we just had to count the remaining crates in the end. Then, they started ordering food and I relocated to the kitchen, letting Sabo and Ace get the orders. Luffy had gone to Makino's brewery to see if she was finished for the day.

Fortunately, as soon as I saw the ship in the horizon, I had made Sabo fire the kitchen stove and the three communal ovens in the village square … as well as ask Luffy to remove the vegetables, ham and cheese from the storage room for easier access and enlisting Ace's help with making a hundred kilos of bread dough. Now, it was 'only' a matter of shaping the breads, letting them sit for a while and taking them to the communal ovens to bake. Well, I still had to wait for the dough to ferment.

Looking at the window, an idea struck me. Fresh fruit was a luxury for those who lived in the sea… how much could I charge for them to eat to their heart's content?

…maybe a kiss from the captain?

At that thought, I slapped my face repeatedly. "Idiot! You're nine for gods' sake!"

Damn.

Damn my preteenager body and damn my idiot crush twofold.

But most of all, damn Shanks' bishieness to hell!...

"What was I thinking?" I mumbled, looking at the vat of dough, which was at least two times heavier than myself. "But Shanks! Shanks is going to eat it!"

That thought renewed my strength and I finished molding two hundred bread loaves with vigor.

Despite having left it at the hands of two nine year olds, the bar was still standing when I came back. Makino was in the kitchen, preparing sandwiches with the few loaves we had in the pantry, as well as stirring a pot of porridge (freshly harvested oat! The wonders never ceased...). Luffy was probably lost among the sea of people.

"Do you want me to dice some tomatoes, Miss Makino?"

She looked over her shoulders and shot me a grateful glance. "Please. They are already washed."

And so, I started the monumental task of removing the seeds and dicing a whole crate of tomatoes… "One tomato, two tomatoes, three tomatoes…"

"Fifty five tomatoes, fifty six…" After a glance at the vat of uncut tomatoes, I cried a little.

However, right after I put the sixty seventh diced tomato in the container, the timer I had set beforehand rang.

Thanking the gods for their mercy, I went to check on the breads.

I corrected the shapes, covered the bread and ran back to the bar. By then, the sun was beginning its descent, bathing the sky in fire.

"Fire is red. Strawberries are red. Shanks' hair is red..." I hummed happily.

Then, I entered the kitchen.

"…tomatoes are red." And promptly started crying.

The moon was shining when the breads were finally the perfect texture. I started slashing them. If half a dozen had a heart pattern on top, no one can blame me… right? I then swept the coal and ashes into a large container and mopped the oven floor. With a shovel two times larger than myself, I put the breads in the oven, filled the iron bowls with boiling water, closed the lid and set the timer for thirty minutes.

Deciding against returning to the kitchen, I sat on a nearby bench.

"Yohohoho, yohohoho…" I hummed the melody to myself. It was still beautiful, but…

"I have never heard it sung in Common. How does that sound anyway?"

"And what is the grumpy waitress doing here?"

I turned, lifting my lantern to reveal Shanks' grinning face. "Ah, good night to you, mister Shanks."

"So, I followed the smoke and found a little girl singing a pirate's song."

Now that we were alone, face to face, I actually found my nervousness fading. "Ah, it's just… I know the melody, but not the lyrics."

"But that's not the truth, is it?" I froze. "From what you mumbled, it's almost as if there are other languages."

"Ah… tha-at's…" I trailed at a loss.

"So your name is Ann? You have a twin named Ace. The age doesn't quite fit, though... I know!" He rummaged through his pockets. "Here, read this."

"I have come here and will lead this passage to the farthest ends of the world." I recited out loud. 'Odd…' "What's that?"

"You really are the captain's kid after all!"

"Huh?"

"Pffft- Did you even realize what was written? I didn't understand a word!"

"Huh?" I examined the piece of paper again.

English. Frigging English!

"Huh?!"

"What does that even mean?"

I tilted my head. "You don't know?"

"I may have copied that when the captain wasn't looking," Shanks admitted blithely.

"Ah. I see… um, it's just him stating he was there, wherever there is, and he was going to the end of the world, which I assume is Raftel."

At my words, he deflated a bit. "I've wanted to know for twelve years and it was just bragging… oh well, no helping it." Shanks took my lantern from the bench, put it on the ground and sat down. "You know, a long time ago, the captain used to say his second child would be named either Ann or Ace."

"I have an older sibling?"

"Yes, but I have no idea if she's still alive. When he was drunk enough, the captain would speak of a beautiful silver haired woman he had taken to bed during one of his trips to Ohara. But then, with what happened soon after his execution…"

'Don't tell me…'

"Which reminds me, how did the two of you escape the government?"

"Apparently, father made a deal with granddaddy so he would hide us from the marines."

Shanks looked vaguely interested. "And who's your grandfather?"

"The younger boy who's helping us is my darling cousin Monkey D. Luffy." I grinned. Gotta love indirect answers.

At that, Shanks guffawed. "Garp had children, and even grandkids? Dahahaha! That's just too weird!"

Before our conversation could continue, the timer rang.

I stood up, put on the oven mitts and grabbed the shovel. "Well, time to check on the bread."

"I'll help."

"Thanks. You just remove the breads from the ovens and put them there." I pointed to the drying racks with my shovel. "The tools are in this cabinet." I glanced in the opposite direction.

"Heart shaped, really?" He asked, inspecting a piece of bread by the light of the lantern.

I think my face got redder than his hair. His laughter indicated that was most definitely the case.

"Captain, why are you holding heart-shaped bread?" Benn Beckman asked in a perfectly even tone.

"The captain has a fan!" Someone shouted in the crowd.

As the catcalls and cheers got louder, I was ready to bolt from the bar when an unexpected person came to my aid.

"But, Benny, these are a gift to you, from your dear captain!" Shanks got on one knee in front of his first mate and extended the bread in said man's direction.

At that exclamation, the bar exploded in laughter.

It wasn't directed at me, though.

"…this way, I'll really fall in love, dammit." My whisper was (fortunately) lost in the rowdiness.

Waking up the day after was easy. The truly difficult part, however, was moving anything other than my eyes.

'That's what you get for baking a hundred kilos of bread, dicing that entire crate of…" I shuddered. "Tomatoes and running around, as well as picking an entire cart of fruit… "

"Ooooooooooooooow."

My sincere exclamation of pain stirred something to my right side. "Ah, so that's why my arm's numb…" For there, lying prone on my shoulder, was Luffy. 'Aw, he's still the cutest kid ever! Heavy, though.'

How was I supposed to get up and start the day if that meant I'd have to wake him up?

"I'm hungry."

Luffy huddled closer and let out a contented sigh. My stomach growled.

Dilemmas, dilemmas…

Reluctantly, I carefully replaced my shoulder with a pillow so as to not wake him up. Then, I went to the kitchen to fire the stove… only to scream at the mess on the way.

The floor was completely covered with bottles, and then, a layer of pirates in various states of consciousness and one more layer of bottles, as well as dirty dishes strewn on every surface (was that a… dirty sock hanging in the windowsill?). Sometime yesterday (or today, I wasn't sure), the tables and chairs had been pushed to a corner, lying in disorderly heaps. I was understandably angry.

"What. Did. You. Do. To. The. Bar?!"

My scream was very potent, considering almost all of them startled awake. The special combination of high-pitched voice only little girls in distress had and a pair of very strong lungs was possibly the worst nightmare of hung-over people.

At first, they looked around in a sort of drunken alertness, but then, seeing no danger, relaxed. "Why the scary face, little miss?" Someone asked.

"You- you—Unbeliavable! Look at this mess!" No words could properly convey my fury at these… these… savages!

For some reason, that last phrase startled them more than the initial shout.

"Was that…"

"It can't be!"

"Dahahahaha! Priceless!"

Whatever adoration I had for that man was (momentarily) forgotten as my eyebrows furrowed further. "What do you mean by priceless?"

"Dahahahahahahaha! She didn't even notice!"

After everyone calmed down and cleaned the place (the Red Hair pirates were surprisingly skilled with those chores), we sat down like civilized people and ate a hearty breakfast of cheese omelet sandwiches, fresh fruit, milk and tea (I pretended not to notice the few who 'seasoned' the drink with rum, although I drew the line at beer—who puts beer in their milk anyway?

Then, I finally got my answer:

Some people develop haki in situations of extreme distress.

Others, after years of training, never get close to obtaining it.

I… may have accidentally used it in a fit over cleanliness.

(It got better—or worse, depending on your perspective—when, three days later, I had my menarche.)

"Did I just activate haki as some kind of extreme PMS?"

I vowed to never let anyone discover that particular fact.

They stayed for five days, which was enough time to unwind and resupply. During that time, Makino had finished with her brewing and we got to making fruit conserve, as well as all sorts of 'exotic' cakes—that is, recipes I had mysteriously acquired, which fetched us enough money to restock the bar and finally start the kitchen expansion Makino had been talking about for years (it was more a case of quantity over quality, because, gods, those people ate so much.)

I had also convinced them to bring spices from places they visited, as well as books and supplies that were more easily found in the Grand Line in exchange for barrels of fruit conserves and a promise to serve new dishes with the ingredient they provided next time they visited.

Ace finally got a few unbiased stories of father. That didn't change his opinion, but I wasn't really expecting that in the first place. What really brought him delight, though, was finding out Shanks had also met mother a few times, though she hadn't been father's wife at the time.

Sabo got to talk with a real navigator, as well as hear all sorts of stories from people who had come from all walks of life. He wrote everything down in his notebook until it ran out of pages. He kept the original for himself and a copy for the library.

Luffy had found a father figure, as well as a new life goal.

For these reasons and more, those were some of the best days in our lives.

The cloudless morning of the sixth day saw them off to the Grand Line. Although the winds were slow, as if reluctant to see our parting, the ship was soon out of the line in the Horizon.

Then it hit me.

'Can you please tell me about haki?'

'Later.'

"Can you—"

'Oh no! Luffy is climbing the piano again!'

"Can—"

'Let's play poker!'

"He tricked me!"

Red, red everywhere end_

000

So, did the readers think the Reveal was underwhelming? You totally did, didn't you?

I may have taken this SI thing to extremes. This is RL me from 2013 (injuries, hamminess, slightly self-destructive tendencies and all), so nothing that happened to RL me afterwards will influence Ann, unless she learns/experiences it herself. Some are impossible to learn, like post-2013 fandoms, music, pop cult references, and canon knowledge past chap 720, more or less.

000

Random info:

Making bread used to be so difficult! Nowadays, you just have to throw the ingredients in the bread machine.

...adjusting the dough texture, shaping and cutting should still be done manually, though. So in the end, the only thing it does well is kneading. Huh.

The tomato crate of doom: OP is a Shounen manga. People eat their own weight in food.

Ann separated the pate ferment, I just didn't include it because it was getting overly detailed. This "recycled" ferment is a precious treasure!

Ann insisteds on a perfectly round nine hundred ninety nine kneads. Bad choices all around.

In order to transport fruit, they have to pick them too early, which means the it doesn't get the nutrients from the tree to finish ripening. As a result, we have low levels of sugar and bland 'ripe' fruits. Importing 'fresh' fruits not only gets you a substandard product (even if labeled 'premium'), the carbon footprint will be the size of the world. Ann is still marveling over truly ripe fruit, years later...

Yeah, I'll stop the unnecessary food trivia now. orz