No light, no light in your bright blue eyes
I never knew daylight could be so violent
A revelation in the light of day,
You can't choose what stays and what fades away
And I'd do anything to make you stay
No light, no light
No light
Tell me what you want me to say
"No Light, No Light" ~ Florence & the Machine
. . .
"Something's not been right with her all week."
Diggle let out a huff that sounded like there was a hint of laugh in it. "Oliver, let's face it. Felicity's seeing a guy and you're not happy about it."
Oliver was sitting on the floor, dressed in leather, and he was staring at the wall in which his arrows were currently sticking out from. This was the third night in a row this week that Felicity had been late… It wasn't that, though, it was the fact that she hadn't acted at all like the Felicity that he'd come to know…and even love. Felicity Smoak was intelligent, fierce, beautiful, and so compassionate. That was not the Felicity that he'd been seeing as of late.
Over the last few weeks Felicity had started to date someone. The first couple of weeks had produced an even happier Felicity and she'd proved that she could balance dating with Team Arrow business. But lately…lately, she'd been overly quiet, almost sad, and was always late. Oliver had also noticed that she'd stopped making eye contact. Diggle had been dismissing his concerns, but Oliver was fairly sure that it wasn't just jealousy.
"Have you met him?" Oliver asked.
"No."
"Neither have I."
Diggle sighed. "Oliver…what do you want me to say?"
"I want you to be more concerned," Oliver told him as he moved his gaze to look in the direction in which Diggle was sitting. "She's been dating him for weeks now. Neither one of us have met him. She's been acting different…at first, I liked seeing how happy he seemed to make her—"
"You're a bad liar."
Oliver glared. "She's been different lately, Diggle. A bad kind of different. I /want/ her to be happy…"
"Do you remember how you were 'fine' when Barry Allen came to town?"
"I was!"
"You really need to work on admitting your true feelings," Diggle told him. "Can you really blame her? We're all together so much. She deserves to have a private life that is actually /private/."
"Do you know his name?"
"Josh."
"Surname?"
Diggle seemed to stop and think. "No…"
"All I know is Josh, too," Oliver told him. "And that he works as a financial officer somewhere in Starling City."
"Are you suggesting that we Google him?"
Oliver shrugged. "At this point, I almost wonder if we should ask Lance for help."
"You're really losing it."
"I can't believe that you don't see it!"
The sound of the door closing echoed through the Foundry. "See what?" Felicity asked quietly.
Oliver looked up and over to where he knew that she had to be. There was really only one practical way in and out of the Foundry. He didn't know why, but she looked so small to him and there was something about her that just made him want to hug her and hold her. She was dressed in a dress that he'd seen her wear before, her purple coat hung over the top, and her purse was in tow. Her gaze was downward, her glasses clinging to the bridge of her nose, and her hair concealing much of her face. She moved to her station without another word and without glancing around.
"Oliver's just being paranoid," Diggle responded in a cheery tone and without missing a beat. "Nothing new… You know how he gets sometimes…"
He couldn't take his eyes off of her. It ate at him that he didn't know what was wrong…what was different…and most importantly, /why/ it was different. Oliver's first instinct was always to be straightforward about things, to be tough and even intimidating. That wouldn't work with Felicity. He couldn't be that person towards her. At the beginning it had been that way because he didn't know any better… he didn't know /her/…and he certainly didn't know the brilliance and endless wonder that was Felicity Smoak.
Without Felicity Smoak, he had to be different. It wasn't because she was a woman or that she was sensitive and used her heart and brain. It was because of the person she /was/, how precious she was to him, and how much he'd been changed because of her. He smiled because of her. Felicity was the one who had shone a light on his dark soul and had taken his hand and lead his back to the land of the living. Things hadn't always been easy, between them or just in general, but they always got through it. He knew that he could trust her, with everything even when sometimes he thought that her choices were wrong. She was always right. He hated that she was always right, but she saw the world so differently than she did. She saw people differently than he did. She was amazing and perfect and so many other things…and above all else, he loved her.
He loved Felicity Smoak.
If she wanted to be happy with this Joshua guy, then he was okay with that. What he wasn't okay with was how she'd been acting the last week or so. He missed his cheery dose of Felicity Smoak everyday. She didn't smile, she didn't look at him, and she only talked to him when it had to do with Arrow stuff. It wasn't even really /to/ him unless it was over the radio, it was mostly out loud for him and Diggle to hear.
He needed to talk to her.
Oliver knew that it wasn't going to happen with Diggle right there. He could talk to Felicity with Diggle there, but he would never let him push how he needed to. Oliver also felt like maybe Felicity would let down whatever wall she'd been putting up if it was only them. He sat there and thought for a moment. He'd already been out on patrol once… It was still fairly early in the evening though.
"I'm going out," he said as he got to his feet. He pulled the hood up and placed his mask in place. Oliver didn't look at either of them as he made his way across the Foundry in order to grab his bow. "Diggle, do you think you could pick up some dinner?"
"Preferences?" Diggle asked.
Oliver stopped as he picked up his bow. He thought about it for a moment. His normal response was for Felicity and Diggle to sort it out, but this time…this time he could take advantage of the situation. "How about that new place? Geoff's?" he asked and waited to hear Diggle's response. He was fairly sure he knew what it would be already and was ready with a quick response.
"That's all the way across town," Diggle complained.
Oliver turned to face Diggle and noticed that Felicity's back was to them, but that she wasn't typing. He shrugged. "It's not like it's been busy tonight… Felicity and I can handle it for twenty minutes."
"It'll be more like an hour."
"If we need you, we can call you."
Diggle made a face. "You know, with you pretty much broke, we really should think about the more economical way for us all to eat here at night." He didn't argue anymore though and actually started to get his coat on.
"You know what I like," Oliver said before Diggle could say anymore. He turned and quickly made his way out of the Foundry. His plan was to leave the Foundry, wait until he knew that Diggle was really gone, and then go back in and talk to Felicity. He just hoped that it didn't blow up in his face.
. . .
She hadn't seemed to notice that he'd returned. Oliver hadn't been Arrow quiet or anything. He'd purpose made noise because he hadn't wanted to scare her. He set his bow down as he approached. His hood was pushed back and he pulled his mask off. He stood behind her for a moment, studying her. She didn't move. She was still wearing her jacket, which was always odd. She hadn't turned towards him yet and Oliver sighed.
"Tell me what's wrong," he whispered.
Felicity was quiet for some time and he had thought that maybe she wouldn't answer when she finally spoke up, though she didn't turn to face him. "Nothing's wrong."
"You're lying. You never lie to me." His voice wasn't harsh. It was gentle and matter of fact. He wasn't trying to upset her or be overly pushy. He just wanted to state the obvious in hopes that she'd reveal what was going on to him.
"I thought you were going to patrol?" she asked. "You were only gone for ten minutes. Did you forget your quiver?" Normally, he knew that that would have made him laugh or at least smile. It didn't. It was the way that she said it. She was quiet and there was no wit in her voice. It was monotone and he didn't miss the almost sadness I her voice.
"I was hoping that you'd /talk/ to me," he continued. Oliver reached out and turned the chair so that she had to face him. Her gaze was still downward and his heart sank. What had happened to her? What had this Joshua person done that had changed her like this? Oliver crouched down in front of her and lifted her chin until their eyes met. Her blue eyes were normally so bright and now they were almost grey and Oliver couldn't read them like he normally could.
"I've been talking to you for the last minute."
This wasn't his Felicity.
"I know there's something wrong," Oliver told her. "You're keeping something from me and Diggle… We're here for you, Felicity, and we want to help you, but you have to let us… You have to tell us what's going on… Let us in…"
For a moment, her expression changed and her mouth opened. For a moment, Oliver was sure that she was going to tell him what was wrong. Her mouth quickly shut and she bit her bottom lip a moment later. She closed her eyes and shook her head. Tears fell from her eyes. "I can't…"
"Why?"
"Because…"
"Felicity," he whispered as he held her head between his hands. "You know that Diggle and I will do anything for you… We're here for you. Just like you've always been here for us. Nothing you say could ever change that."
With each tear, his stomach twisted more and his anger towards Joshua got hotter. He could tell that she was torn and weary. Oliver didn't understand why. They'd been together for what sometimes felt like a lifetime and he didn't understand why she wouldn't just trust him. He didn't understand why it seemed so hard for her.
"I can't…" she blurted out a moment later and shut her eyes again.
One of his hands cupped her cheek and kept her face so that it was level with his as his other hand ran along her arm. His eyes were on her, watching her, waiting for her to tell him something…for her to change her mind. She needed to know that they'd be there for her no matter- Oliver froze when she cringed and let out a slight sound of pain. The sound would probably normally have been missed by most people, but he'd heard it loud and clear.
"Felicity."
Her eyes opened again and they went wide. She pulled back, so that his hands fell away from her. Oliver knew then that he wasn't supposed to have heard that and that she was now worried. Understandably so because Oliver Queen would kill anyone who hurt her.
"Felicity."
Her chair moved back just an inch, but then she was up and trying to grab her bag. "Since you're not going to patrol. I should probably go—"
"You're not going," he said quickly as he straightened up and was blocking her quicker than she could move past him. Oliver took a step towards her and she didn't move. They were now toe to toe. He was gentle and slow as he reached out to remove her purse from her grasp. She didn't fight him and Oliver dropped it next to her on the chair she'd just been sitting in. Slowly and mindful of Felicity and her reaction to his movements, he reached out and grasped her hand. To his surprise, she squeezed gently. Oliver wasn't sure if that was her way of telling him that she was okay with this form of pushing or whether she was begging him to stop. Her eyes closed a moment later and all he knew was that this couldn't go on.
Oliver moved behind her and released her hand. Like a gentleman, he slowly removed her coat from her shoulders. Heat filled him as the coat was moved to reveal bruising up and down both of her arms. It wasn't like small bruising either, not like she'd run into something… Oliver could tell that it was the work of hands… It wasn't just one on each arm either…it was up and down her arms…
"Diggle and I would have—"
"You would have killed him," she whispered.
And it was the truth.
And he still might, Oliver thought.
His fingers ran ever so lightly along the bruising. Oliver couldn't imagine anyone ever hurting Felicity or having a 'reason' to do so. "How long…?" he whispered.
"I don't know… A week…"
"Has he hurt you anywhere else? Has he—"
"Oliver, stop," she whispered and turned to him. Her arms stretched out and touched his arms. Her blue eyes stared into his. "It's okay…"
"It's not!" he snapped and he was immediately mad at himself for snapping at her. Oliver took a step back and breathed. After a moment of settling himself, he stared at her. "I'm sorry…I didn't mean—"
"I know," she whispered back. "But bruises will heal."
"He shouldn't touch you…"
"Oliver—"
"Do you love him?" he found himself asking as he stared at her. He knew that some people had a fetish for pain when it came to sex, but he'd never have thought that Felicity would be one of those people. He still didn't believe it as he stared at the dark bruises on her fair and delicate skin. Felicity being in love with the man was the /only/ way that he could see her staying with him through everything.
She didn't respond right away.
It actually took her some time to respond and Oliver wondered if it wasn't even a question that she'd asked herself. He didn't know how such an intelligent and strong woman could be with a man who treated her with such violence, but he wasn't in Felicity's shoes so he knew that he couldn't judge and he really couldn't understand. He and Felicity were very different people.
"No," she finally whispered.
"Then why do you stay with him?"
She looked upset and confused and…he swore he saw fear in her eyes as she stared back at him. Was she scared of Joshua? Didn't she know that he and Diggle would keep her safe? If they knew what was happening, they'd do anything and everything they could to keep her safe.
"I'm afraid of him."
"Diggle and I—"
"Oliver, this was something I got myself into—"
"We're family, Felicity—"
"You and John—"
"We would do /anything/ for you."
They were both quiet for a moment.
"I know you would," she breathed. "That was the problem."
"What?"
"You would have killed him if I told you."
"I'm still contemplating it," he told her honestly.
"He's dangerous, Oliver."
"He doesn't know my secret."
She looked scared. "You want Queen Consolidated back and he's—"
"I don't care about that right now," he told her. It was true. He'd happily spend the rest of his life poor, if it meant that Felicity was safe. "He can blacklist me or /try/ to. I don't care, Felicity. I care about /you/. You shouldn't suffer—"
"Oliver—"
"Please, don't worry about me."
They stared at each other for a long time and Oliver's mind kept going to the dress that she was wearing and wondering how much of her skin was bruised underneath…and then he wondered if she'd covered up anything on her face. It was killing him to not be out there, ready to put an arrow right through Joshua.
"I don't want you to go to jail…or to kill someone because of me," Felicity said slowly.
"So, just tell him it's over."
"He has things at my house."
Oliver knew that if he was with her and anywhere near the guy that he'd at least feel the need to pound his face in (and rightly so). So, he took a moment to really think over a good plan. "Diggle can go with you. Get everything together, meet him for coffee, tell him it's over, and then give him the box." He paused for a moment. "If we need to go further and get a restraining order, then I'm sure Lance would have no problem assisting us in that."
"He could make our lives miserable, Oliver," Felicity told him. He could tell that she really was worried about them, but that didn't mean that they were going to let him continue to abuse Felicity. That just wasn't going to happen. "He works at Starling National Bank—"
"With Walter?"
Felicity nodded slowly. "He works under Walter."
"Maybe we need to inform him about the kind of employee that he has working for him," Oliver told her gently.
"I don't want everyone to know," she told him quickly and he could tell that she was scared.
"Let's just start with you breaking up with him and returning his things," Oliver said. "Diggle and I can take turns crashing on your couch for the time being…just in case."
"Oliver?"
"Yes?"
"Thank you."
"You know that I'd do anything for you, Felicity," Oliver told her sincerely. "Never forget that…and never hesitate…"
. . .
The End.