A/N - Hello lovely readers, it is here! NO delays and it is the longest Chapter I have ever written! I take that as a good sign? Hopefully you all won't find it too long? (Tell meh if you do!) This Chapter I had a bit fun with and did almost nothing like my Chapter 28 preview, to which I apologize. When I write those, they are really just a rough draft of what I think that next Chapter will be about/hold, but of course... I never know until my fingers get typ'n! Anywho, This Chapter I had a lot of fun writing, it consist of several things and begins to pick up time. It's got some Madge in there for those 'Madge lovers', a tiny bit of fluff for those 'fluffy lovers', a pretty pissed off Katniss to Darius for those 'Darius lovers' AND a pretty important Chapter ending! Not a major cliffhanger though. (Maybe though?!)
Okay.. Some of you guys had me cracking up at your Reviews! I LOVE them! They brighten my day! Thank you - Ephesians613, Firework7 (Duh.. of course!), Chey8151, Sarah7821, AbbyDaNinja, finewithnotbeingateennot and MadHatter0542! Wow! Took me a minute to get everyones usernames! THANK YOU for your Reviews, SEVERAL literally brighten my day, especially you MadHatter0542 - I always thought my writing techniques suck, so that means so much to me! (Yes, I love Les Mis and that song, it always reminds me of Mockingjay, and the war) God I could sit here and write long replies you all ALL day! But I won't :(
Anywhosie, PLEASE don't get mad at me if you don't like long Chapters, read some of it, and then come back in the week and read more? Chapter 29 will be up SATURDAY OR SUNDAY like usual, most likely Saturday. AND... not this Chapter (that I know of yet) BUT most likely the one after (Chapt. 30) Katniss will have the little tike! YAY! Get excited peeps... I officially got a name now for him or her! Whoot whoot! Well, PLEASE OH PLEASE drop a Review and tell meh what you thought of this LONG Chapter... they sure do brighten my long days! SO much love to EACH and everyone of you! - Macayla
* I unoffically call this Chapter- "Tears, Smiles and Kicks."
PS - The Chapt. 29 Preview is going to be very basic but boy OH BOY it's going to be packed JAM FULL with all kinds of stuff! Were going to the Capitol!
Half an hour I find myself preparing to mount the stage for the second time today, letting Gale rub soothing circles on my back as I wait for Mayor Undersee to call my name from the stage. Thankfully, the baby hasn't moved anymore, giving one less fear as this moment.
The person I saw was no one other than Thom's mother. I'm not entirely sure why my heart 'sunk' but it did. After I had blacked out a month or two ago, both Gale and I agreed we wouldn't visit Thom's family until I felt completely up for the trip. Both physically and mentally. Now though, I had no option as she came to Gale and I. It was her that led me to stand where I am right now. She wanted me to sing an old, common song among remembering the dead. I immediately said no… also immediately regretting it. But, I eventually said yes.
It didn't (and doesn't) come easy though.
I haven't truly sung since my father's death, now six years ago. Only occasional songs to Prim after a nightmare, but even that has been some time… at least a year and only singing softly with the students. But I also haven't sung at the Harvest Festival since my fathers death, or without him. It's painful and brings back far to many painful memories for me to enjoy this moment. I'm not looking forward to it but I feel like I owe this to Thom, to his hurting family. I turn my attention to the Mayor who just begins to speak-
"Citizens of District 12. We have suffered far to much pain and hurt within our small, tight-knit District…"
I listen as the Mayor continues, speaking of the recent Mining accident and of course… the lives that were lost. The families that suffered and are suffering. I take loud, deep breaths as I prepare for what I'm about to do as I sense the Mayor coming to a fast end to his speech.
"Katniss, you can do this." I hear Gale say from behind me. He doesn't stop rubbing my back. "Just take some deep breaths."
I do as Gale instructs, even closing my eyes for good measure. In and Out. In and Out.
"Now, with great pleasure I would like to welcome District 12's Community School music teach, Katniss Hawthorne to sing in the honor of the precious, precious lives lost."
XX
Gale helps me up the few steps up the stage, even though I clearly haven't progressed that far in my pregnancy to need help with such a task. I let him though, not wanting to let go of his hand as I feel myself shaking beneath his grip.
My hands shake even more as I let go of his hand, accepting the metal microphone the Mayor is handing me. Turning from my side to the crowd is another hard task but I do it. Not staring at the crowd but instead to Gale. He stands there, next to my mother, Posy already heaved back on his shoulders. Even she wears a matching, grinning smile like Gale. It's at this. The sight of Posy that gives me the small amount of Hope I needed. I open my mouth to sing, it's cracked and pitchy from lack of use but when I do, I begin to feel something… in my stomach again. I realize, the baby is moving, light, feathery moving. Almost in rhythm of the song and tone/notes and my voice. But… I feel as though it's different this time. I'm not consumed with fear. It's as if my little daughter or son is telling me it's okay. That he or she is proud of me.
Just like I'm sure my father is of me.
After I sing and exit the stage, the scene becomes much more lighter after such a heavy moment, picking back up with light felt, dancing music. The very second my voice quit singing the baby quit moving… to my surprise. I tell Gale of this, to which he is overly excited and joyous to hear. Of course once I've finished singing I'm ushered by many polite compliments from strangers again, but the best come from my own family.
The late afternoon quickly turns to evening and my happy, weight lifted, free spirit continues with the day. I find myself dancing with a group of people before I know it, smiling and laughing but being mindful of the baby.
That night, at home, after everyone has gone to bed, I find myself wrapped in Gale's warm embrace. Letting a rare smile pass my lips.
XX
The days slowly turn into weeks and before I know it, the weeks turn into a month, over a month. Every week has brought some kind of new pregnancy experience. The bump is… a bump. There is absolutely no mistaking I am pregnant at twenty six weeks now. None of any of my clothes fit anymore. I'm narrowed down to wearing Gale's oversized shirts and lounge pants. But the day my mother came over, carrying a box filled halfway with clothes was I completely overjoyed. I was no longer having to dress like a tom-boy as my mother finally found the box of clothes she wore when she was pregnant with both myself and Prim. Their normal clothes… pregnancy jeans, stretchy shirts, a weird black, wide belt like that my mother claims helps with the back pain (that seems to be growing worse and worse as the bump consumes me) and pregnancy dresses. My mother asks me to wear the dresses, stating I never wear dresses and they help with the heat flashes. The day that I came downstairs, wearing a two-toned, grey, knee length dress, my large baby bump protruding proudly out did Gale smile so widely I'm sure I felt some of the pain… but I'm sure that was the baby kicking. My mother also has me going with her on her evening walks. I enjoy them somewhat.
The babies movements are no loner… 'movements' or light flutters and feathery feelings, at twenty six weeks I have turned into a human punching bag for the child. It hasn't been easy, letting go of the strong fear. Finally I broke down a few nights ago during our walk when the baby wouldn't quit kicking.
"Mom, I can't do this!" I let out through my heavy sobs.
"Sweetheart but you can." She answers softly. "You're so strong, Katniss."
"Yes, but not like this!" I snap back, letting my vision become blurry through my tears.
"Yes, you are." She answers quickly back. "Just think…" She pauses for a second. "Every time you feel the baby move, what does that mean?" She asks me.
"I… I don't know mom!" I stutter, being utterly lost at an answer.
"It means that the baby is alive, Katniss." She says softly again. "It means that you baby is breathing."
"But that's the point mom. It's alive! It's a baby that's going to depend on me!" I snap again, seeing no way how this is helping me. I begin regretting talking to her.
My mother sighs heavily, obviously near the end of her long patience. She closes her eyes, only opening them a few seconds later.
"Try this. Every time you feel the baby move, think of someone, that you know, that you love or admire. Like Gale, Prim." My mother says, I notice she leaves her name out.
At her words or… suggestion, I see absolutely nothing helpful in it. What does she exactly mean? I'm not sure. But I don't see the point in it.
"Just try it Katniss, that's all."
XX
That conversation with my mother the few nights ago got me no where. I do as my mother instructed but see absolutely no point. As I sit here now, at Darius' home, letting the twenty six week old baby kick away, I become irritated… fast.
"Damn it Darius, why the hell did you want me to come over?" I ask frustrated. Although it wasn't Darius who wanted me to come over… it was Gale.
I'm not sure why but Gale has been acting definitely a little different lately… not entirely in a bad way though but I notice he spends more time in the woods and town, even taking Prim with him to the town a lot. I assume it's to give me a break, to get the house quiet for me as I take my newly found afternoon naps, but him and Prim have never been loud when in the home. I also realize Gale can't keep his hands off of my baby bump since it both have grown and the movements. But that's not was has been odd.
"Well, I just wanted to see how you were doing." He answers, smiling as he takes a sip of his beer as he settles in the chair in front of the couch I sit on.
"I'm fine. Can I go home now?" I ask. My comment must be humorous to him unless it's the beer that's getting to him. I throw my braid behind my shoulder as I feel another quick heat flash over take me. My mother is right, the thin, knee-length yellow dress I have on does help with them.
"Whoa there, slow down. Not yet." He answers. I huff in frustration. "So, what's that kid been up to?" He asks.
"What do you think it's doing in there? Playing hockey?" I snap sarcastically. It's late afternoon… I'm hungry, it's time for my nap and the baby won't quit kicking. I'm in no mood for Darius right now.
"No." He answers quietly. I can tell that beer isn't Darius' first. "Hey… I'm trying to make conversation with one of my favorite people." He says, strutting over to me in a 'dancing' way. He's nearly drunk.
"Darius, I'm not in the mood for any of your crap!" I snap again, shifting on the couch to find a more comfortable position with the large bump.
"Okay, okay…" He says, taking a seat at the opposite end of the couch. "So, ask me about my day!" He says cheerfully, grinning.
"How was your day Darius?" I ask, no emotion and completely frustrated. Gale will pay for (making) suggesting I should visit him.
"Oh…" He drags out. "It's better that you're here." He says, winking. I huff again.
"Why do you forget that I'm married?" I ask him, staring at the door and finding myself plotting an escape.
"Oh, right." He says.
"Can I go home now?" I ask again, through gritted teeth.
"No."
XX
"Gale, why did you make me see him like that!? Out of the blue for no reason!?" I ask Gale as we walk from Darius' home to our home. We walk slow and I sense myself near waddling from the bump.
"Just hush and enjoy the walk." Gale answers lightly, slipping his hand into mine.
"Enjoy the walk my ass! I'm tired Gale and you made me put up with a freaking half drunk Darius!" I shout, being mindful of my volume as we pass a family. The woman sends me a sympathetic smile as she sees that I'm pregnant.
"I'm sorry." He answers but I can clearly see he's hiding a laugh.
"Don't you laugh at me, Gale!" I snap, only making him grin. "Gale!"
"Come on, were almost home and I have a surprise for you." He says, trying to mend the damn grin.
"You know I hate surprises!" I snap at him again as we begin to see our house approaching. "God you're going to pay for this, Hawthorne." I add as I feel my back begin to ach from the walk and supporting the bump.
I place my free hand underneath it, in hopes of relieving some of the pressure. It does nothing, but at least I tried. We walk up the porch steps before Gale steps in front of me, making me halt to a stop and my bump hits him.
"Close your eyes." He says before I can protest.
"Wha- Gale I swear-" Before I can finish he huffs in frustration, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a small rag like.
He walks behind me and places it over my eyes, turning my vision black mandatory. This time I huff in frustration. I begin to protest again when I feel Gale move to the front of me, taking both of my hands in his. He begins to lead me into the house, I hear the door shut behind myself and Gale slowly guiding me from the kitchen to somewhere else but I can't tell.
"Gale I swear, if this is some kinky sex thing-" Before I finish I hear laughter and I know clearly it isn't Gale's. It's to high pitched.
Our mothers.
I huff yet again (never ending for this day) at the thought of both of our mothers just hearing me say that and obviously finding it funny. I pray that Prim isn't present. From what I can tell I feel as though I'm standing in a doorway, but I'm not sure how. The only room besides upstairs is Prim's bedroom. I feel Gale move directly behind me and drop his hands to my waist.
"I know I'm not the husband that someone as beautiful as you deserves, but I thought this might relieve some of the stress I'm sure was there." Gale says, nearly whispering it in my ear.
Next I feel the blindfold fall and the vision before me is beyond beautiful. Prim's bedroom as been turned into a full blown nursery. The what was wood walls are painted a soft, muted green, matching the color of the woods. I walk in to see more and Gale has literally thought of everything. The small, dark wood crib sits in the corner, sticking out from the wall. I can tell by looking at it and by the uneven wood tones that Gale made this himself (explaining his extra time in the woods and town.), even filling it with warm blankets and a small teddy bear. The thought and beauty sends a smile on my face. I continue looking around the room to find a small table, the same wood as the crib. It has a bottom rack-like or shelf, stacked with cloth diapers, and some clothing. A small patted mat sets on the top, obviously for changing the baby. The small rocking chair has been moved from the bedroom to in here and I take notice at the many blankets that rest on it, most likely for my comfort as I'll be spending a lot of time in it.
Another large, soft blanket lines the floor near the rocking chair, resting a few, falling apart toys on it. The dresser that has always been in this room is still here, stacked with more clothes. All unisex colors. Shades of faded yellow, black, white. But I also take notice to both pink and blue colors too. The small window is wide open, letting the sun, breeze and sounds of birds singing fill the room. I can't help but feel as though I'm in the woods, calming and peaceful. My woods.
"Gale, its beautiful!" I say, realizing the tears in my eyes. The baby that was lightly kicking me stops. Immediately. I turn to Gale who still stands in the doorway, I can see our mothers and Prim behind him. "Thank you but…" I realize something. "What happened to Prim's stuff? Where is she going to sleep?" I ask, wishing I didn't have to ruin the beautiful moment.
Gale smiles, cracking a bit of a laugh and I see Prim move up more, standing beside Gale the best she can in the doorway, he moves over some.
"I'm moving back in with mom, Katniss." She says lightly, knowing I won't like the news.
And she was right. I feel myself becoming almost instantly mad at the thought of Prim moving back in with our mother. Yes, the relationship between the two of us has been better and she hasn't had any recent melt downs but that's beside the point. I want Prim here. I realize I'm becoming more angry with Gale than Prim.
"Gale, why the hell did you do that without talking to me about it first?" I ask angrily. I can understand it if Prim wanted to move back over but I'm sure Gale was the one that suggested it so he could do this to the room. I becoming more angry with him faster and faster.
He walks over to me, tucking a piece of hair that got loose from my braid behind my ear.
"Katniss, it was Prim's suggestion. I told her no, but she insisted I do this." He answers. Prim steps forward more as I see our mothers leave the vision of the room, obviously giving us space. Prim nods her head in agreement to Gale's answer.
"You know it would have have to happen, Kat. Where else would the baby sleep?" Prim speaks gently.
Prim is absolutely right. I haven't given is to much thought but she's right. We have no extra bedrooms but our mother does. The only option the baby would have had was-
"Our room, Prim." I answer after a few seconds of hesitation, pointing to Gale and I.
"Yeah, but the two of you need your space too." She replies. "Katniss, really, I don't mind. I want to be closer to mom." She drops her voice before her next words in assurance that she won't hear. "She needs us."
Prim is right yet again. Although yes, our mother hasn't had any recent melt downs and nearly spends ever second of her free time (the time she's not healing the sick/injured) with us, she does indeed need us… Prim at least. I think again of the thought I had just a few months ago when I thought of my mother in that dark house that use to be so alive with a happy family before my fathers death. Now it's a cold, dark place. Deserted by her children. I shake my head at Prim's words, but I still don't want Prim to move back.
"I know." I choke out, dropping my gaze to the wood floor. "It's just…" I hesitate. "I want you here, Prim." I look up from the floor to her piercing blue eyes. The vision is cloudy from my own tears.
"I know, Kat. I want to live here too but mom needs me as well. You know I'll come by every day!" She says cheerfully, trying to 'up' my mood.
I don't smile though.
XX
"Katniss?"
I look up from the book I'm writing in to the doorway to hear knocking on the doorframe. I sit in the nursery in the rocking chair as I wait for Prim to take her few last belongings from the living room to back to our mothers home. I realize my mother was right after Gale had showed me the new nursery, rocking in the chair slowly helps with the kicking, it helps the baby fall sleep, which helps me relax. But it seems, that every time I'm in here, in this room, the baby goes still… calm. Gale smiled when I told him of this.
"Come in." I saw quietly to see Prim come in slowly.
I close the small journal I was writing in, my mothers suggestion that I keep track of my pregnancy. I hate doing it but it gives me something to do, something to keep my hands busy since I've been narrowed to only being in the woods two or three days a week. I can't fit under the fence any more and it isn't any fun having both Gale and Rory try to help me climb over it. They both laugh. I scowl.
"What's up, little duck?" I ask, setting the pencil down on top of the book in my lap. My sudden movement makes the baby kick violently as I obviously woke it.
"You okay?" Prim asks me as I must make a face or some sign of the doings. She comes over to me.
I clutch the handles of the chair tightly enough to cause my knuckles to turn white. The baby quickly stops though as I begin rocking steadily in the chair. "Kicking?" She asks after I don't answer.
"Yes." I reply quickly.
She takes a seat at my feet, reminding me of the time I was in kindergarten, sitting on the cold ground as our teacher read us all a story. I smile at Prim, so much grown from even last year. She wears a continent smile.
"Does it hurt? When the baby moves?" She asks me. It surprises me somewhat, you think Prim would know. I almost laugh a little.
"Sometimes." I say, shrugging and moving my gaze and hand to rest on my protruding belly. "It's just…It's…" I hesitate, realizing I haven't talked to Prim about how the moving effects me… frightens me.
"You know you can talk to about anything, Katniss." She says, picking up on my hesitation. I sigh heavily.
"It's just… It's scary. The world is so evil, Prim." I answer, being careful not to frighten her this time. She doesn't hesitate at all before quickly answering.
"It is. But it's only as evil as you let it." She says, talking calmly and so adult like for being thirteen.
I cease my eyebrows in concentration to Prim's words. I'm not really sure at exactly what she meant by her words and I don't understand. She picks up on this too.
"You'll understand soon." She says. "I didn't until I saw the wounded miners recently."
I cease my eyebrows yet again, noting that that was the day that Prim had a break down at the scene that was going on around her. The Prim that I know, the healing, kind hearted, throwing herself in front of a gun for you, wasn't the same girl I saw that day. I saw a hurting, broken, crying Prim that I only see during a nightmare.
I nod my head at Prim's words, unsure of a correct answer or reply. I wish I didn't have to 'wait' until I understand but sometimes, Prim is smarter than most people think. She has a small gift of words, encouraging, uplifting words that I love to hear from her.
"I love you, little duck." I say, but I add more quickly. "I'm sorry we did this to your room."
Even though the room is beautiful and completely ready for a baby, I know that Prim most likely didn't enjoy seeing her room go from 'hers' to the babies.
"Katniss, it was never mine." She speaks like I'm dumb. "It was always the babies." She adds, pointing to my bump.
"What?" I ask, confused.
"It was never mine." She repeats, shaking her head. "I always knew…" She begins to change her smile into a wide grin. "That one day, even if it took years, that you and Gale would have a baby together, and I knew this room would be the child's room."
I start laughing… hard and I'm not entirely sure why. Maybe at the sight of Prim's face set in a wide grin like it is. She begins to laugh with me but as soon as I begin really laughing, the baby begins kicking again… violently… repeatedly. I stop laughing instantly, causing Prim to stop as well.
"Kicking?" She asks like it's a no brainier.
I nod my head 'yes' in answer and close my eyes tightly, rocking back and forth… back and forth. It doesn't stop though. My laughing must have woken the child out of his dead sleep and startled it, most likely getting revenge on me. I gasp a little when I feel a hard kick straight to under my ribs. I feel Prim's hands on my bump, making me open my eyes to see her head dropped to it.
"Come on, little one. Stop kicking your mama so hard. I'm sure she doesn't appreciate it." Prim speaks to it, in a tone I rarely hear. A tone you normally uses for injured animals when she's in her 'healing mode'.
"Keep talking." I say to hear through a gasp, realizing at her voice the baby calmed, but only resumed kicking when she stopped. Prim looks up to me quickly but then back to the bump just as fast.
"I'm your Aunt. You haven't met me yet, but I'm excited for us to meet. We can do all kinds of fun things together!" She says cheerfully.
Prim continues talking on like this for several minutes, mentioning and 'discussing' all kinds of things to the baby. How his parents like to hunt, how his grandmother is a healer, how his new nursery or 'bedroom', as Prim put it, looks. I smile when finally the baby calms down enough to only those feathery movements.
"What would I do without you Prim?" I ask, trying to catch my ragged breath. She only smiles but doesn't answer the question when she speaks.
"I remember when Mrs. Anderson was pregnant with Alec, she always hated the kicking too." She says, mentioning Thom's mother. "She made anyone and everyone talked to it when he started to kick and move…" Prim says, keeping her hands on my belly and staring at it with a smile. "I always loved to talk to him, before he was born." She finally turns her gaze to me.
"Are you excited? For the baby?" I ask, not really knowing what else to say but being curious for the answer.
"Are you seriously asking me that, Kat?" She replies, removing her hands and standing. The grin on her face brings one on my own. "I'm so excited! Since I could truly understand babies and children, I've always wanted to be an Aunt. And a mother! But right now I'll stick with being an Aunt." She says, causing both of us to laugh.
"Good, Gale and I will need a trusted baby sitter when we hunt." I say, winking. It's amazing at how much she can lift my spirit, with just her presence alone.
"You know I'll be more than glad too, Katniss!" She says more brighter and happy as ever. Nearly jumping with excitement. "I can't wait to meet her… or him!" She adds. "How far are you now?" She asks.
"Twenty six weeks… six and half months?" I reply, questioning my guessing at the months. I can't say I've been overly tracking them besides the weeks.
"That's only three more months!" She says brightly again.
"Yes and don't remind me." I say, more then grateful to get the child out of me but knowing that I'll be meeting this child… face to face frightens me as well.
"Don't be nervous!" Prim says, like it's not big deal. "I know it's scary, but it's your baby."
Prim is right (for the third time) but I haven't fully told her of exactly 'why' I'm so scared. I feel as though so much weighs on this child's shoulders. The games. Starvation. Poverty. I feel as though the safest (and I know it is) place for my baby is where it is right now, inside of me. Unless something happens to myself, the baby is perfectly safe from the threat of the Capitol and the world outside. I only smile at Prim, not wanting to burden her with this.
"I know, little duck." I say. "I love you."
"I love you, too."
That night, the first night without Prim in the home since awhile, I find myself sitting in the nursery yet again, after Gale has gone to bed. Taking note to the such fine detail Gale was careful to add. The toddler drawing of Gale and I that Posy did, the beautiful sculpture of a tree that Vick made in art class (his hidden talent), the drawing (that's done amazingly) from Rory of the woods, the gorgeous vase of dried flowers that Rhoda rearranged, the two beautiful quilts our mothers had been secretly working on, the touches of Prim's old baby toys that she gave to our child scattered across the room. My child's room is filled with touches of the people that already love him so much.
"You have so many people so excited to meet you." I tell my baby who's only kicking lightly.
"Me included."
XX
The next morning I find myself smiling as I realize I don't have to teach the music today, it's Saturday and a day off for me. I slowly (and very slowly with the baby poking out) get out of bed, noticing Gale left a note on my nightstand. I reach out and read it before getting out of the bed-
'I've gone hunting for the morning. Please take it easy today, I left you out some clothes for you. You don't have to wear them though. I love you so much, Katniss. I think I fall more in love with you everyday.
Always yours,
Gale H.'
I smile as I place the note back on the table, noting the late morning sun coming in through the window. Gale should be back from hunting any minute. He's been leaving me these types of notes for the past several weeks and I love them. I get up, instantly getting a protest from my child-
"'Morning kid." I speak to the baby as I feel a very light kick at my doings.
I change from my nightclothes to my days ones. Pulling on the clothes Gale left out for me on top of the dresser- pregnancy jeans that seem still to tight and a stretchy white, mid-sleeve shirt. I walk over to the corner of my room, where my boots are to find a small note attached.
'Don't even try, Catnip.
Gale.'
I laugh, hard at the note. Since my bump has completely over taken me now, I can not lace my boots up anymore without Gale's help. If I do them myself I find myself in some odd, uncomfortable, laughable position. So I don't bother with them as I pad downstairs, braiding my hair as I take one step at a time. I start to boil some tea on the stove right as the front door opens, a wild turkey slung across Gale's shoulders.
"Back." He says smiling, giving me a long kiss before setting the bird down on the table. "Wanna skin it?" He asks me, knowing how I love to skin large game.
"Sure!" I reply, searching the cabinets for my skinning knife.
I ask Gale how hunting went as he strips his outer hunting gear off and I begin skinning the huge turkey. It's the only positive without having Prim here… I don't have to go outside to skin my game anymore. Gale informs me that it went well… but only 'well'.
"Winter's three days away, Katniss." He says disappointingly.
I know what Gale means, enough to make me stop skinning and turn my gaze to his heavy one. Winter is the absolute worst for hunting. Nearly half of the animals are in hibernation, the snow on the ground makes it hard to follow animals tracks that lead to their burros or nests, the heavy snow fall can obstruct our shooting and aiming views of game and the regular heavy snow storms (that always blow in) cease us from hunting for days (even a week or two) all together.
"It will be okay." I say, more for me than Gale. He nods is head, being oddly lost for his own words.
We spend the rest of the late morning taking turns chopping the carcass of the large turkey. We chop it into two segments. One for Hazel and the kids tonight and one for us, having our mother and Prim over to eat tonight. I'm bent over the table, wiping it clean of the blood and guts when there's a knock at the door.
"I'll get it." Gale says from across the table, doing the same thing I am. He sets the rag down, heading toward the door.
"Probably Prim." I say as he passes me.
"She knows she doesn't have to knock." He says, opening the door at the same time. "Oh. Hi, Madge." Gale says.
I turn around and low and behold she's there, standing on her tip toes to look behind Gale. He moves to the side as he obviously wants entrance.
"Katniss!?" She calls for me cheerfully, holding two large yellow bag's in her hand's. "How are you doing?" She asks me as she embraces me in a hug(the best she can with the baby in between us). I scowl over her shoulder to Gale, only making him bite his bottom lip to hold in his laugh.
"I'm good. Fine." I answer, truthfully as I do indeed feel pretty well.
I was nervous two month's ago when Madge spotted my baby bump, but she welcomed the news with open arms… wide open arms.
"That is great, Katniss. I have a surprise for you!" She says cheerfully again, holding up the two yellow bags. I scowl again, not caring if she sees and Gale nearly snorts to hold in his laugh. "Oh come on now!" She says. "It'll be fun.".
She sets the bags on the table and begins taking the contents out. I quickly realize it's all beauty items, what most people here in the Seam could never afford to buy from the shops in town.
"You said yourself…" She begins when she realizes I wear a scowl. "… before you married that dork," She points to Gale over her shoulder who still stands in the kitchen. "That you wish you were more girly!" She looks at me, knowing that I'm caught.
She's right, I did say that at least two years ago during lunch break at school. But to be honest, I was only trying to end the awkward silence that day as I didn't have much to say when she started babbling about hair and makeup.
Five minutes later I find myself sitting in one of the dinning room chairs that have been brought into the small bathroom. Gale waits downstairs in the living room as Madge gives me a 'makeover'. She begins working with my hair first, making sure to get her snotty comments about it across. But I find this part relaxing, I've always loved it when people (Gale, Prim and mostly Posy) play with my hair. She won't let me look in the mirror but I feel a cold sensation on my scalp for a second. I don't ask though, not being in the mood for any 'beauty lecture'. She finishes, for now at least, several minutes later, pulling out a butt load of makeup from her bag. I cringe immediately as I have never worn makeup… ever. The very, tiny amount the Hob has I've never been interested in. Most people from here in twelve aren't interested in any kind of makeup, despite the small beauty store in town. But Madge isn't one of those people.
I huff in protest as she begins rubbing something on all the skin on my face. My cheeks, chin, forehead.
"Come on! You can't tell me you're not excited for Gale to see you all…sexy like this." She says, dropping her voice near the end of her sentence.
"I'm pretty sure Gale doesn't care how I look." I answer, being the only reply I could find.
"He's a man, Katniss. I'm pretty sure he does." She says like I'm dumb. "Besides, don't you want him to see how sexy you can be?" She ask me, moving to applying some cold cream to the outside of my closed eye's.
"I… I guess." I answer… truthfully. I do want Gale to have someone who takes pride in their appearance, unlike myself. "Yes, you do." She confirms, moving to the other eye. "You need to show him just how much Katniss Hawthorne can be a woman." I scowl at her last words.
Ten minutes later she's finally done with my makeup and I hate the feeling of it. I think I'm done but she goes back to my loose hair. Doing something weird with it with the comb several times before pulling it into a low pony tail. She helps me into a dress, insisting I close my eyes so I can't see it. She slips it over me, around my bump and from just feeling, I know it's long, to the ground and the straps are extremely thin. But the marital isn't made of anything fancy or fine. It's still a sun dress.
She turns me around and tells me to open my eyes. She has me in front of the full length mirror but I nearly choke on my spit, being confused at the girl who's staring back at me. I look nothing like myself. My hair is indeed pulled into a loose, low pony tail but it's fluffy. My hair looks nearly curled everywhere else. My side bangs for a change rest nicely against the side of my forehead and little stray pieces of hair stick out on the side of my face, shaping my face. My makeup is a different story. For once my skin tone is completely even and no marks show or freckles. My face literally looks smooth and glowing. Around my eyes is a dark shadow, high lighting my grey eyes and honestly making them pop out and sparkle. My eyelashes even stick out further and are bolder than usual. My lips have a soft, nude color that I actually like. The dress is pretty. It's strap's are thin and the top cuts low to show an overly large amount of cleavage off. It's a muted orange color, hugging my bump but extending in a beautiful wave to my feet on the ground, dragging a little. Madge takes notice to the cleavage and quickly retrieves a small pin from her bag and pinning the top a bit closer together, still showing a fair amount off though.
I look back into the mirror and realize I do look… sexy. The way the makeup is, it displays my features. Making my nose look narrow, my cheeks hallow and my eyes deadly.
"You look so beautiful, Kat." She says and for once… I do.
I finally feel pretty.
Gale's reaction is pretty priceless that afternoon.
XX
"Uh, I thought she'd never leave." I say to Gale as he comes back into the living room. I sit with my feet up on the couch, being thankful the dress flows enough to let me.
He retakes his seat next to me and I lean back into his embrace. Sighing with being content and relaxed.
"So, has Prim talked to you yet?" He asks me through the relaxing silence.
"About?" I question. Opening my eyes."She hasn't." He confirms to himself. I sit up a little, looking into his straight face.
"About what Gale?" I ask him as I see his expression is emotionless.
"The Capitol trip, Katniss." He says, finally meeting my gaze. I lean off of him and sit up beside him.
"No." I reply solemnly and honestly. "I guess since you've been taking her to those meetings, I've been trying to avoid thinking about it." I add, being honest again but knowing I'm wrong.
"Well, we can't keep avoiding it, Katniss-"
"I know." I reply in a whisper, cutting him off from his words.
"Especially not now." He says quietly.
I feel an old to familiar cold chill run through me. What does he mean 'Especially not now'? I know the new year is just a month away but the trip isn't until March or April. I must make some kind of face about Gale's words.
"Katniss…" He takes my hand into his. "The trip's been moved up. Sooner."
I cough involuntary, knowing now that it's been 'moved up' means I need to make a decision about this sooner. I've been indeed trying to avoid thinking about this topic. There is no way I want Prim to be sent to the Capitol. I don't care if it's a 'field trip' or not. But for the sake of peace and not for a fight, I told Prim I would think about it and allow her to keep attending these meetings… but I wasn't going. Gale of course took Prim's side, accompanying her now instead of me.
"How soon?" I ask, realizing I haven't asked that. His next words make me stop breathing for a second.
"Five days, Katniss."
XX
"This is stupid, Katniss." Gale says to me as we track through Town, heading to the nicer neighborhood where Darius lives.
But we are not making this trip to see Darius, I'm making this trip to visit Principle Maddox, demanding more answers and information about this trip before I chart my sister off to a murder place. Gale keeps saying this to me, that it's 'stupid' to discuss this with her. Gale hasn't told me this yet, but I think he has no problem sending her with the school to there. But he's also the brother of the little boy (Vick) who got expelled from this trip by punching a kid who was bullying him.
"Don't piss me off, Gale." I say to him, knowing my patience is already running thin and I don't want to lose my temper with Principle Maddox. He backs down immediately.
During our walk to her home, I notice I get odd smiles from people I either know or crossed paths with before. I quickly realize it's because the way I look. I'm still all dolled up from Madge's 'surprise'. I scowl and don't return any of the gestures or smiles.
We come up on Principle Maddox's home quickly, only being several houses down from Darius'. Her home, on the outside at least, looks nearly identical to Darius' expect the décor. Principle Maddox has flowers in large vases outside on the porch, making it look cozy. We never see flowers on people's homes in the Seam. I knock a few times and she answers quickly.
It's weird to see her… normal. She doesn't have her hair neatly fixed but instead in a messy pony tail. She doesn't wear her normal 'business' attire but instead a pair of black lounge pants and a blue tank top. Her normally light makeup is gone, leaving her fake completely naked. The thing that strikes me though is the baby on her hip. That I know of, she doesn't have children. She's not even married.
"Hello, Katniss. Gale." She addresses us upon opening the door. "Is there something wrong?" She asks. I hate how 'nice' she has been to me lately.
"I need to talk to you. If you have the time." I say to her, knowing Gale won't say anything at this moment.
"Oh sure! Come in." She replies, opening the door wider. The baby makes a squeaking sound as we enter the home.
As the home on the outside looked just like Darius', so does the inside, again… expect for the décor. The home is filled with light, faded colors and far less messy than Darius'. It's neatly organize and books line every one of the many, many book cases.
"Take a seat." She says while shutting the door, gesturing to the yellow couch in the living room. I do (and so does Gale) with Gale's help, relieving some of the pressure on me back. "How's the pregnancy going?" She asks me, taking a seat on the couch opposite of the room, setting the baby down in the middle.
"Pretty good so far." I say, rubbing my protruding belly and eyeing the baby who is cooing away while chewing the heck out of a stuffed bunny. I let a small smile escape my lips.
"Oh, she's not mine!" She says quickly when she sees me eyeing the baby. "She's my brothers." She smiles when I move my gaze to her. "So what did you need to talk about?" She asks me and I take a deep breath.
"About the trip to the Capitol." I say quietly, I feel Gale put his arm around my lower back.
"Oh… of course, dear. Anything." She replies, sitting up straighter in preparation to my questions and concerns.
I finally let off some steam and tell her exactly why I'm so nervous. About sending my little sister to the place where they murder children her age… for entertainment. She nods her head at every word and doesn't interrupt. Gale even nods his head in agreement with my words a few times.
"I see your concern, Katniss." She responds when I finally finish. "You are not the only parent… guardian-" She corrects herself quickly. "… to have this problem. I can ensure you Katniss, and Gale, that Prim will be perfectly safe. We will not be taking the children anywhere around the arenas. We will though however…" I cringe a little at her words. "Be taking them to the District Museum there, which sadly will have some on past Victors from the Districts. But we will not be taking them anywhere else or anything to do with the Games on purpose. Of course, it's hard to ignore anything about the games when you are in the Capitol. I've been there before."
"You've been there?" Gale asks shockingly, taking his gaze off of the baby and to her, in a way cutting her off. She smiles at him.
"Yes. But that was long ago." She replies softly. "It will be hard to avoid it, Katniss, but I'm going to do my very damn best at getting them no where near it. I swear." She looks at me, eyeing me intently to see if this is changing my opinion(s).
I can't say that it necessarily is, but it has helped, tremendously. It's just putting Prim's life, in someone else's hands that worry me. I'll never feel as though Prim is completely safe unless I am with her. I hate putting my trust in other people and I hate it. Especially putting trust in the woman that yelled at my seven year old sister that was crying for me. Principle Maddox picks up on my heavy hesitation for words.
"Katniss, if it makes you feel better, I've been searching for more chaperons for the trip… you are School Staff." She says, smiling wide. "And yes, I'm asking for you to come along with us. You too, Gale. You know… since the mines haven't reopened yet." She says, smiling wider.
After a bit more conversation it's final.
I'm going to the Capitol….
Chapter 29 Preview: What will happen on the trip to the Capitol? And the train ride over? What will Prim think when she hears that her 'over protective' sister and brother in-law will be joining her? How will Katniss take the effects of visiting the Capitol and their crazed people while being pregnant and emotions already high? What will Darius do that shocks both Katniss, Gale and Prim? And what will take place when Mrs. Everdeen starts preparing her daughter for the challenge of delivering her baby? Will Katniss freak, faint or smile through the knowledge of what's about to come? ALL things will be reveled Saturday... and you DON'T want to miss it!
UPDATE Aug. 25th 2013 -
Hello dear readers and friends, GOOD NEWS! I have created my OWN Twitter account! YAY! I've decided to share the info as this WILL NOT have ANYTHING to do with my Fanfiction. It's all about keeping up with what I do in my life personally. This journey of writing Fanfiction and a FanFiction Trilogy that has so many amazing readers (Come on.. you know you're one of them!) has been amazing and I REALLY want to contact with you all personally, on a not-so-creepy, safe level!? I'll be posting all kinds of stuff NOT related to my Fanfiction (But some Hunger Games still.. Duh!). It will be personal things (what I'm up to, where I'm going/trips/vacation, stupid things I do on a daily basis, writing tips and the list could go on). Anyway, feel free to click "Follow" to let me know you read the Tweets! Oh... and I'm new to Twitter, Ya might have to cut me some slack! But head on over... it's going to be FUN!
LINK: Twitter CaylaS16 (No spaces, you can find the link itself on both my Profile and Facebook)