The Secret: Part 2

MAY 9th, 2011

-2 minutes after the reveal-

Have you ever felt so angry, that you literally become paralyzed? I thought that once I heard the name of the guy who did it, I would hunt him down…but…I couldn't move. My brain was trying to contemplate what I just heard. Repar? The guy I looked in the EYE and thought that maybe, JUST MAYBE, he would be right for Margaret. I should've known though; the way he was acting perverted at her party, by looking at her crotch. It may have been the only time I saw him do that, but that still meant something. This…is starting to be too much.

After the dreadful silence, I asked, "How…did this happen, Margaret?" I asked trying to hold in my concoction of emotions.

"Remember when I said Repar and I were together 2 years ago, before you and Rigby came to the city? During that time…he wasn't exactly right in the head…and then one night-"

"Did he hurt you?" I asked hastily.

"No…he just…forced himself on me."

A very unpleasant image popped into my head.

Dear God…Margaret…no.

She continued, "That's the real reason why I left him and tried to find someone else. They all turned out to be jerks. So, on a random day, after the camping trip we had, I get this call: It was Repar. I was going to hang up, but he told me how he had changed, gotten better. I wanted to see for myself and he showed me the treatment he was getting to get his mind straight. He truly apologized for what he had done to me…in the end I had forgiven him."

What? So you forgive the guy who raped you?

"…Does your father know about this?" I asked, still trying to have this sink in.

"Yes, he's forgiven him too. Repar truly proved he had changed. He wanted to be with me again…I took him back."

How does a father forgive the man who raped his own daughter?

"W-Why?"

"…I hear stories of women who go through the same thing I have gone through; they let it take over their lives, but I'm not. I can't let the past control and I go through each day getting stronger. I forgave Repar and took him back. He truly changed and was the Repar that I fell in love with in the beginning. My dad understood my intentions and forgave him as well."

"…Does this all explain the insomnia and eating habits?" I sighed, covering m face.

"Yeah…" Margaret said.

"I knew something was up…"

"I still…get nightmares though; every so often." Her voice seem very innocent, almost scared.

It's because of Repar she has the insomnia. It's because of him, she has and eating disorder. It's because of that fucking monster, that she still has nightmares! Repar was no longer a "he" or "him" to me. "He" was an "it".

Margaret must have seen my face, because then she said, "Mordecai, I want you stay strong for me. I've been able to forgive, I'd like for you to do the same." She said it in an understanding voice.

I still couldn't take it. All the time I knew Margaret, she always dated jerks and I never got a chance. Now she's with a "former rapist" or whatever fucking term you want to use and yet I'm still not with her?

What-The-Hell?

I'm the right guy for her, I'd never hurt her. I'd always be there for her, love her unconditionally. Basically, the bastard got away with rape and is still with Margaret. I've been a good-hearted person to her and get nothing. I'd help get past the frustration of her insomnia and eating disorder, I'd help her grow stronger every day. I would do everything and anything to get her back on her feet again. I couldn't keep silent anymore…I had to tell her how I truly felt from all this.

"Margaret…" I started. "You know…how I told you I loved you, right? Well I still do…I'll-I'll always be there for you. It's just that…I feel like I should protect, as I want nothing bad to happen to you…" Margaret nodded in understanding.

"Just know," I continued. "if for any reason your relationship with Repar doesn't turn out well, I'll be there to comfort you…to be there for you…"

She smiled warmly, "Thank you Mordecai…" Her voice was compassionate.

I started to choke up a little. "Can I-" Margaret must have read my mind. Both of us were cross-legged on the floor, but we got on our knee to hug each other. This one was much longer than other hug I got from her.

We held onto each other for a long time and during that time, I said to her. "I love you Margaret…as a friend and someone so much more." A giggle of happiness escaped her throat. We let go and looked into each other's eyes. Overwhelmed by the numerous emotion going through me, I needed sometime to gather my thoughts.

"Where's your bathroom?" I asked a minute after our hug.

"Up the stairs and first door to your left."

I went into the bathroom, turned the light on and shut the door behind me. I rested my elbows on the sink counter, while I had my head in the palm of my wings. I looked up into the mirror to notice my eyes were red…red…from tears. I was crying the whole time and I barely noticed it. I quickly pulled myself together and went back down to the basement.

During the 30 minutes that followed, Margaret and I talked for a while, without acknowledgement of the previous conversation. She sat in one of the armchairs in the basement, while I knelt down next to her, showing funny pictures Rigby and I took and funny websites to check out. I almost wanted to wrap my arm around her, but halted. I just…couldn't.

Margaret's father came in the house later on: 5:45pm. He checked on us to see if we were okay. I told them I actually had to leave, seeing how Benson wanted me home at a certain hour, ever since the campfire party. Margaret volunteered to drive me home.

During the drive back, I couldn't get help but think of the big reveal. My brain was flooded with thoughts. I mean at first I loved Margaret because of her beauty, then it became a more personal attachment and now, it is a sense of protectiveness. To know that this happened to her and that I couldn't do anything about it tore me apart inside. Goddammit, I wanted to sleep this off, but even that couldn't possibly make this go away.

The Devil was praying.

That dream…again. To my sudden fear, I think that dream actually did predict something. The Devil was praying. It was a contradiction. Repar is the Devil; he did bad things. Praying; he seemed nice when first meet him. That's the contradiction! He seemed nice, but on the inside he still raped Margaret. The girl who was raped in the dream was meant to represent Margaret. There was one part of this dream that worried me though: In the dream, I killed the Devil…so what am I going to do to Repar?

Margaret and I finally got to the house after what seemed hours of thought. She stopped the car in front of the steps.

"Well I guess I'll see you later?" Margaret asked.

"Yeah, hopefully I'll be free this week," I said.

Margaret looked at me and moved forward to hug me. I knew that this was probably a big thing for her to reveal to me and I could see it in her eyes. Before we both were able to wrap our wings around each other, I heard a light tap on the car window. I turned around to see it was Rigby, trying to get my attention.

"Mordecai! Mordecai!" I heard him saw behind the window.

"I guess I better see what he wants," I said to Margaret.

"Yeah…I'll see you later Mordecai," she said sweetly.

"See ya later."

I got out of the car and saw her drive off; So much for the emotional hug.

"What do you want Rigby?" I asked, a little flustered.

"Eileen just beat your record on Dig Champs!"

Wait, what?

"How?..."

"Come on dude, see for yourself!"

He led me to the living room to see the score screen. She did beat me.

"Looks like I'll have to work on my technique," I said.

"It won't work, I'll always beat you," Eileen teased.

"Ohhh! She told you!" Rigby gloated playfully. He gave Eileen a high-five.

All of this made me smile but only for a second: I still couldn't forget that conversation Margaret and I had. I had to relieve some stress somehow.

"I'm gonna see what Skips is doing," I told Rigby, but he was too busy playing games with Eileen to notice. I left the house and went into Skips' garage. He was meditating like he usually does. I noticed something in the corner that could help relieve some stress.

"Hey Skips, can I use that?" I said pointing to the object.

Skips opened his eyes and looked in the direction I was pointing. "What, that punching bag? Sure, you can use it. I didn't know you boxed."

"I don't." I approached the punching bag, pretending it to be a certain someone. I let the anger build up in me, the rage. I made a left jab at it. The punching bag shook a little. Then I took a right jab at it. The bag shook harder. Left, right, left, right. I could see Repar's face and I wanted it gone. I threw a left punch, then a right, huffing between every punch. The punching bag flew back a little on the chain. Punch after the punch, the bag looked like it would fly off the chain. Suddenly, I felt strong hands stop my right punch. It was Skips.

"Calm down," Skips said.

I relaxed my arms and let them fall to my sides.

"Do you need to talk about something Mordecai?" he asked.

"No," I said catching my breath. "I've had enough talking for today."

Alright, we've now reached a turning point in the story. (Not a midpoint) I warned you this story would get deep and this is just the beginning. The next chapter will be far off since I'm going to be working on my other fics, including a new Benson/Audry oneshot ;) And once again, thank you to all the review/followers of this story. Your support means a lot :)