A/N: I started this one a while ago, so it was before Sara and Roy joined the team. There'll probably be one more chapter to this. Hope y'all like it.

Felicity was just going through the motions. She was on auto-pilot. Zipping her dress, sliding her feet into heels, and swiping just enough foundation over her cheeks so she didn't look like the walking dead.

Dead.

Oliver was dead.

Felicity's foundation brush dropped from her hand and hit the floor. It left a stain on her carpet. But she didn't notice that. Not now. She'd notice it later, of course. And she'd spent half an hour trying to scrub the dried up make-up from the fibers.

It wouldn't go away. The stain would be on her carpet forever. Just like Oliver would be dead forever.

Sinking to the ground, Felicity wrapped her shaking arms around her knees, tucking her body into a tight ball.

She rested her forehead against her knees and sobbed. She sobbed until her body felt as if it was empty. She sobbed until her body shook.

Felicity had lost him.

But, a voice broke through her grief and whispered, Moira and Thea and John lost him too. Starling City lost the hero they didn't know they needed.

Felicity took a shuddering breath, and pressed her palms to the floor. She lost a friend, a lover, and a partner. But Moira and Thea had lost their son and brother for the second time.

Felicity pushed herself off the floor, wiping her eyes. She wasn't really family, but she could be there for the Queens – if they wanted her.

Thea threw herself into Felicity's arms as soon as the blonde pushed the heavy doors to Queen Mansion open.

Had the doors always been that heavy? Felicity wondered, Or am I just becoming weaker?

Startled by Thea's sudden presence in her arms, Felicity was limp as Oliver's younger sister hugged her.

But once Thea's body started shaking, Felicity reacted. She looped her arms around Thea's shoulders, hugging her close.

Stroking Thea's hair, Felicity fought between the desire to run away and the desire to scream.

This felt wrong.

None of this was right.

Not the heavy curtains covering the windows.

Not the flowers covering every surface.

(God, Felicity thought if she saw another flower ever again it would be too soon.)

The tears falling fast and furious onto her shoulder from Thea's eyes weren't right.

She shouldn't have had to lose her brother.

Not the first time, and not this time.

"I'm so sorry, Thea," Felicity whispered, hugging the young girl tight.

Thea sniffed, "It's not your fault. I mean, a freak car accident, how could you have stopped that?"

A cold shiver went down Felicity's spine.

Car accident. That's what she and John had decided on. Because how could they possibly tell Moira and Thea that Oliver had been the masked vigilante protecting the city?

Felicity sighed, and let Thea break away from the embrace. Thea's eyes were red, but Felicity watched as a blank expression slid onto her face.

It was an expression Felicity knew well. Oliver wore it all the time. That was the expression of a girl who wanted to protect herself.

Felicity squeezed Thea's hand, "It'll get better."

Thea gave a disbelieving scoff, "Felicity, you know it won't. But, thanks."

The blonde nodded as Thea walked slowly to where Moira was waiting for her. They were standing by the stairs, greeting and thanking everyone that came in.

Felicity sighed, turning away from the overblown picture of Oliver that was resting on a stand near an obscenely large array of flowers.

She had taken that picture.

He had been so damn happy that day. The day he had taken her and Thea to a baseball game. The Starling Comets had lost by 8 runs, but the three of them had whooped and cheered though, drawing stares from the people nearby.

John's hand landed on her shoulder as she surreptitiously wiped tears from her eyes, fingers coming back with black mascara streaks on them.

"How're you holing up?" John's voice was soft.

Felicity laughed without joy, "How do you think I am? Devastated…John, how are we going to do this?"

John's eyebrow's shot up, "Do what?"

"Get through today, and tomorrow and the day after that. I don't think I realized how much Oliver was a part of my life," Felicity's lip trembled and she leaned into John's side, not trusting her legs to hold her up anymore.

He shook his head, "One day at a time, Felicity. That's the only way we can."

She took a shuddering breath, "And step one is getting through the funeral is step one, right?"

John squeezed her shoulder, "Step one's always the hardest."