Chapter 22 – Honesty

After arriving on Destiny Islands, finding the local resort, and explaining to the front desk that no, they wanted a suite with two rooms, not one, and no, Ven was not, in fact, their actual son, Aqua had about had it. It wasn't that she minded that the receptionist thought they were a family, it was just that she wanted to pass out on a bed right now, and the longer she had to wait before that happened, the crankier she became.

At last they had their rooms. Ven was out as soon as his head hit the pillow. He had been quiet the whole way here, either because he was tired or because what Sora had been through was still weighing on him. Perhaps both.

Terra plopped his stuff on the other bed, and Aqua made her way over to the smaller bedroom. Her room smelled like pineapple and coconuts, and all the decor either had one or the other on it, as well as a third, star-shaped citrus fruit.

Paopu fruit, huh. Well, Destiny Islands was famous for it. She still hadn't ever gotten to try any for herself, but maybe that would change this time around.

The sound of running water reached her ears and she sighed. I really should take a shower, too. She was gross and smelly and sweaty, and the thought of trying to sleep like that was not appealing. So she stripped down to her tank top and shorts and waited for Terra to finish in the bathroom.

But then hunger gnawed at her stomach, and she popped up to check the mini fridge in the kitchenette for food. There were only bottled drinks inside with labels slapped on them saying how much munny they cost.

"400 munny for a bottle of water? Is that a joke? What a rip-off."

"Are you thirsty?" Terra called. Oh good, he must be finished with his shower, then. That meant she could take hers now. So long as she stayed busy, she wouldn't have time to think about what had happened. Her head wasn't hitting the pillow until she knew she would fall asleep within moments. Thinking still just hurt too much.

"More like hungry," she said, replacing the offending bottle in the mini fridge and shutting the door. "Just checking to see if there was any—"

Aqua froze. Terra wasn't wearing a shirt. He'd slipped into a pair of the resort's gray sweatpants and was drying his hair with a fluffy towel, little water droplets dripping off of it and running down his neck. It was with great difficulty that she tore her eyes away from his chest and forced herself to look up at his face.

Well, of course he doesn't sleep with a shirt on. He never did before. Why would that change now?

A dark voice in the back of her mind whispered, Those muscles haven't changed either, and she felt the heat creep up her cheeks at the uninvited thought.

She couldn't fault Terra or his current (lack of) clothes for being such a distraction. Her own attire was hardly what could be called modest, either. Growing up she'd been careful to look presentable at all times, but after wandering in the realm of darkness for so long, she'd stopped caring. Ven had seen her in her current outfit on multiple occasions and neither of them had been particularly bothered by it.

Then why is this different? She crossed her arms over her chest, suddenly very conscious of her own body.

You know perfectly well why. The voice taunting her in the back of her head sounded suspiciously like the Phantom Aqua's.

Her eyes wandered back to his chest and dared to travel lower. What would it feel like to—

"Do you want to get something to eat?" he asked, and she snapped her eyes back up to meet his, ashamed she'd let herself get so carried away. "There's a restaurant downstairs, or we could always order room service."

"Mmm, room service is too pricey, and Ven's asleep. It's okay, I can just wait till morning." Anything to excuse herself from this conversation. It was taking a lot more self-control than she currently possessed to keep her focus on Terra's face and not his body.

"He'll be fine." Terra paused, as if he was trying to decide to tell her something. "Actually, there's something I want to talk to you about."

Oh, those words did not bode well. They did not bode well at all. But clearly, it was something he wanted to talk to her about without Ven there, and who knew when they'd have the chance again.

"Okay, but I want to take a shower first." She was not about to go to a nice restaurant in her current state.

The hot water didn't do a very good job of cooling her down. Try as she might, she couldn't get the image of Terra drying his hair, the muscles rippling in his arms and chest, out of her mind. Groaning in frustration, she attacked her own sudsy hair with a vengeance, scrubbing it like it had personally offended her.

She turned the faucet off. Oh heavens, was that what he wanted to talk about? She hadn't tried to hide her feelings, and Ven certainly hadn't helped her case, but at the same time, she wasn't sure she was quite ready to have that particular conversation. Not after everything that had happened. Even just the thought of navigating such delicate territory after the blow Sora's suffering had dealt them all made her exhausted.

And besides, even if she were ready, they were on the cusp of a huge battle, and they couldn't focus on anything but that. Not when Sora was still hurting. Not when they'd lost Lea. Not when Kairi's life was still in danger.

She sighed. I'm being selfish again. I don't have time for this. I need to focus on the upcoming battle.

And that's why you lost him the first time, the Phantom's voice shot back. Tell me, Aqua, when are you going to stop running away from your own heart?

I'm not running. I'm just doing what has to be done. I can think about the rest afterwards.

What if there is no afterwards? Are you really going to give up what may be your final chance to be with him?

I… I don't even know that he feels the same way.

That's a lie and you know it.

Aqua bristled. After what Sora went through to save him, it doesn't feel right! How could I be so selfish? Terra wouldn't even be here if it weren't for him. I don't want this, not when Sora's heart was the cost.

Excuses, excuses. Did you ever stop and think about why Sora handed himself over? Maybe you reminded him of when he was pining after Kairi, hoping to be reunited with her. He didn't want you to go through that anymore, and now you're just throwing away the gift he gave you.

Aqua groaned and shut off the water again. She was better off stumbling her way around Terra than being left alone with her own thoughts.

She threw on an oversized tie-dye t-shirt that said Destiny Islands Resort on it in big, bold letters and slipped into a pair of sweatpants with the same font plastered on the leg. Not the kind of clothes she would normally choose, but at least they were comfortable.

Looking at herself in the mirror, she took a deep breath.

"You can do this, Aqua. Just… be honest."

She nodded. That was all she had to do. No more, no less.

You're nervous, Eraqus said.

Well, yes. This is something I've been meaning to tell her for years.

She deserves to hear it, even if she already knows.

I know.

Terra cleared his throat, and Aqua paused with a spoonful of tropical fried rice halfway to her mouth. The ocean breeze tugged at her damp hair, and even in her baggy resort clothes she looked beautiful.

In any other situation this would have made for a great date. The restaurant under the stars, the fruity drinks with their little paper umbrellas, the Christmas lights strung all around the patio casting a warm glow over everything – the whole atmosphere screamed romantic getaway.

But that wasn't why Terra was here. That wasn't why either of them were here. This wasn't a romantic getaway, this was the two of them exhausted and hungry and trying to put the pieces back together after a dear friend had put everything on the line for them.

He swallowed. It was now or never. "Aqua, there's something I have to tell you," he said. She set her spoon down and sat up straighter.

"Yes?"

"It's something I should have told you a long time ago."

Aqua paused, and when she spoke again, her voice was very deliberate. "Yes?"

"I'm sorry I waited so long. There just wasn't a good time to tell you until now."

"...Yes?"

"Aqua…"

She leaned forward, her hands clutching the edge of the bamboo table, and he took a deep breath. "Aqua, I wanted to say thank you for saving me."

A strange mixture of emotions warred on her face. Terra thought he spotted disappointment somewhere amongst them, though what she had to be disappointed about, he had no idea.

She was silent for a moment, then gave him a sad smile. "Well, I couldn't just let you be lost to the darkness. Not when I knew I could do something about it."

"And what you did cost you everything. I'm sorry, Aqua. I never wanted you to sacrifice yourself for me."

Why did the people around him always have to pay the price for his mistakes? It wasn't fair.

She put her hand on his, her voice soft. "Terra, I have a lot of regrets, but saving you isn't one of them."

His heart thudded in his chest, and he leaned closer. "Why not?"

She leaned closer, too. "I… I would do anything to keep you safe." Her face flushed at her words, and she ducked her eyes to avoid his gaze.

He gave her hand a squeeze. "I understand. I feel the same way about you." He waited for her to say something else. But she was silent, and he knew not to push it any further. Not tonight, at least. Not after everything that had happened.

He released her hand. How selfish am I, for even thinking about wanting to be with her at a time like this? The guilt settled around his heart again and put a damper on the rest of the meal, even while they tried to talk about everything but what was really bothering them.

Afterwards, when they were back up in their suite again, he watched her retreating form and sighed.

You know, Terra, I think you handled that very well, Eraqus said.

Thanks for the commentary, Master. Am I going to get a grade, too?

There was a pause. Well, if you insist. I give you a B+.

Terra groaned. Do I even want to know why I got points docked off?

I think you already know the answer to that.

Terra chose to ignore that particular jab and focused on something else. Don't forget, Master. You really do need to talk to Aqua and Ven.

Eraqus sighed. I know. I will. But if it's possible, I'd prefer to speak with them directly.

How do you propose we do that?

Sora isn't the only one who has the power to dive into hearts. Riku took Kairi inside of Sora's heart, did he not?

Yes. I'm guessing you want him to do the same for my heart, but this time with Aqua and Ven? That way you can talk to them.

Yes.

Alright. I'll ask him tomorrow.

Thank you, Terra.

Riku lived in a house on the edge of the street. It was two stories with cream-colored paint and a dark brown rooftop. The shutters were the same rich color, and an elegant white-picket fence enclosed the yard. On the porch hung one of those big swings meant to hold several people at once.

Ven thought it looked like the perfect sort of place to raise a family. Idyllic, calm, cozy – it was very different from the enormous castle where he'd lived with Terra and Aqua and Master Eraqus.

Riku answered the door. He looked pretty tired, despite the time he'd had to rest. His eyes brightened at the sight of them though.

"That was fast," he said, gesturing to them to come in. "Are the princesses safe?"

Aqua nodded and followed him inside. "Yes. We were able to hide them again. We got in last night."

His shoulders relaxed. "Good. Not much has happened since I last saw you. Donald and Goofy are guarding Kairi, and Sora hasn't left his house." He rubbed his neck and sighed. "He still hasn't talked to me or Kairi. Donald and Goofy just said to give it time, but I don't know if that's good enough."

He pointed to where a row of shoes of several different sizes lined the wall and stepped up into the house, and the rest of them took theirs off and followed after him.

"I'd like to talk to him," Terra said, as Riku led the way into the living room. He sat on the comfy-looking checkered couch in the corner, and Aqua joined him. After another moment, Ven plopped down next to her and sank into the soft cushions.

"I need to talk to him, too," Ven said. "One or both of us reactivated the link between us, and if there's anything I can do to help, I want to."

It was the least he could do, after Sora had shielded his heart for so long. After he'd gone to such lengths to save him and his friends. Ven hadn't told Terra and Aqua, but early this morning, before either of them had woken up, he'd tested the connection again. It didn't feel right to access Sora's memories without his permission, but the raw pain that swirled within him – that he could do something about.

It hurt, but he'd funneled as much of it as he could onto himself, hoping to provide Sora with some sort of relief. He just had to be careful he didn't overdo it. Yesterday's outburst had been a disaster he didn't want to repeat.

Riku briefly disappeared into the kitchen before reemerging with a pitcher of green tea and several cups. He poured them each a glass, then settled into the chair across from them.

"Donald and Goofy might have beat you to it, actually," he said, pausing to take a swig of his tea. "They wouldn't tell me the details, but they said Sora did share some of what he'd been through with them."

That got Aqua's attention. "He did? That's huge. He might be starting to heal already."

She was right. Sora was never one to stay down in the dumps, but not even he could just pop back up after what he'd been through. Still, it was good to hear he was at least trying. The only thing that would make this entire situation worse was if he gave into despair.

"All the same, if there's anything we can do to help, let us know," Ven said.

Riku gave them a lopsided grin. "Sure thing. How about you guys? Anything I can help you with? My parents are at work, my student's gone, and my best friend doesn't want to talk to me, so I have a lot more free time on my hands than usual."

Terra explained his plan. He'd shared it with Ven and Aqua this morning, and they'd both agreed to it. It still felt unreal, that Eraqus was alive, that he'd been taking refuge inside of Terra's heart all this time. As much as Ven wanted to see him again, he couldn't forget their last meeting. What would he even begin to say when he saw him again?

"Hold on, Eraqus is alive?" Riku set his glass down, his eyes holding an intensity that made it impossible to look away. "Terra, why didn't you say anything about this before?"

Yeah, Terra, why did you wait until yesterday to tell us? Aqua likewise looked at Terra and raised her eyebrow, and Terra squirmed.

"There wasn't time. Saving Sora came first."

"But don't you see?" Riku said. "This could change everything. Eraqus was friends with Xehanort, right? That means he knows him better than any of us. If anyone could figure out a way to defeat him, it's his former friend." Riku paused and considered something. "Well, and you too, of course. He was inside your head for years, after all."

Terra smiled wryly. "We're one step ahead of you. Eraqus has a plan that he hasn't even told me yet. He didn't want Xehanort finding out about it. But first he wants to talk to Aqua and Ven."

"Fair enough," Riku said. He instructed them to hold hands and close their eyes. Aqua seemed more than happy to hold Terra's hand, an observation that made Ven grin.

When he opened his eyes again, the four of them were falling. A dark mist surrounded them, but it wasn't cold or unpleasant. All around them images swirled by – no, not images, memories. There was one from when Terra had gotten his Keyblade, and another from his birthday party, and another from that time he'd knocked over—

"Try touching one of them," Riku said. Aqua was the first to do as he suggested, and the memories began to change. Each one was surrounded by a soft, warm glow.

The time he'd brought her flowers, after her parents had died. Their promise to become Keyblade Masters together. The moment she'd saved him from the realm of darkness. Their hug when they'd been reunited.

She briefly glanced at Terra, and his smile was almost shy. Ven had to stifle his laughter. Could they be any more obvious?

Oh yes, yes they could. When they landed on a smooth platform, an image of Terra was etched into it. So was Aqua, and Ven and Eraqus were there too, but her picture was the second biggest after Terra's.

If she didn't know before, Terra, she sure does now.

A variety of elaborate designs were also included, and he thought he spotted Terra's Wayfinder among them. But other than that, nothing. No sign of Eraqus.

"So, um, where's Master Eraqus?" Ven asked.

Riku glanced around them. "Not sure. Sometimes it takes a little while to find the person you're looking for. You guys go on ahead. I think this is a conversation Eraqus wants to have with just the three of you."

They did find him, when Terra accessed his memories of home. Eraqus was waiting for them in the courtyard, the stars shining brilliantly in the night sky up above. Maybe it was because he no longer had a body that could age, but he didn't look a day older than when they'd last seen him.

Ven swallowed the lump in his throat. He'd never expected to see him again, even if he was just a shadow of his former self. The memories from that terrible day came back all at once, of Eraqus trying to strike him down, of Terra swooping in and saving him. If Ven could pinpoint a moment when everything had taken an irrevocable turn for the worse, that was it.

If only things had gone differently. In the end Ven had had to do to himself what Eraqus had wanted to do all along. Could he really fault his master for trying to do the right thing, even if the way he'd gone about it was so terrible?

He didn't want to be angry at Eraqus, not after all this time, but he was. His memories from before his separation from Vanitas were spotty at best, but he remembered enough to know that Xehanort had treated him terribly. He'd put his goals above his own student's safety. For Eraqus to do the same was a cruel way to reopen that old wound.

After all the time Ven had spent inside Sora's heart, he found himself feeling, if not like a father, then at least like an older brother to Sora. The thought of ever doing to Sora what Eraqus had done to him was unthinkable. Nor could he imagine what would possess anyone to even think about hurting someone in their care, let alone making an attempt on their life.

But that side of him was at war with the side that wanted to forgive Eraqus, that loved him and looked up to him and wanted the closest thing he had to a father back in his life. Eraqus's survival was a miracle and he should be grateful. And he was, but there was so much more to what he was feeling than that. It was all too complicated to put into words, so he said nothing.

Neither did anyone else. The four of them stared at each other, unsure of what to say or who should say it.

The silence dragged on for what seemed like ages, and finally Ven couldn't take it anymore. He took a deep breath and spoke. "Master, I—"

Eraqus didn't wait to hear the rest. He strode over and, in a gesture very uncharacteristic of his usual demeanor, wrapped his arms around Ven and pulled him close.

"Ventus, my son, forgive me."

Ven was shocked speechless. He'd expected an apology, but he hadn't expected this. All of his composure fell apart as he lost it completely. He began to sob, his whole body shaking in Eraqus's arms. Years of wondering why things had happened the way they did, of wondering if something was wrong with him, of wondering why his master hated him so much that he would try to kill him, washed over him all at once, only to be replaced by the reassurance that no, nothing was wrong with him, and no, his master didn't hate him. Not at all.

It was with more emotion than he'd ever heard in his master's voice that Eraqus continued to speak. "I was blinded by my obsession with the light. How can I even call myself a master when I deemed it acceptable to strike down one of my own students? I have failed you, Ventus, and for that I am truly sorry."

"You were trying to do what you thought was right," Ven choked out. It was what he'd told himself, over and over, when that moment had haunted him.

Eraqus pulled away to look him in the eye, and there were tears in his eyes, too. "That doesn't make what I did in any way acceptable. Terra had every right to stop me, and you have every right to tell me you never want to see me again."

Ven threw his arms around Eraqus. "As if I ever would. I-I'm glad you're alive, Master."

Eraqus's arms went back around him. "If for no other reason than I could finally apologize to you and Aqua, then I'm glad I am, too."

They stayed like that for a moment, but then Eraqus let go. He still wanted to apologize to Aqua.

"Aqua," he said, regarding her with a mixture of pride and sadness, "my brave, selfless daughter, loyal to the end, always doing whatever I asked of you without complaint. I asked you to keep an eye on Terra, and now I can see my request did nothing but sow discord between the two of you. I might as well have told you to spy on him for me. I'm sorry for putting you into such a position in the first place."

Aqua's eyes were misty, too. "I forgive you, Master. I'm just glad you're still alive. All this time, I thought you were gone, and now—" She paused and summoned a Keyblade. Not her Keyblade; no, Eraqus's Keyblade. The Keyblade she'd kept safe for him all this time. She offered it to him, but he simply shook his head and closed her hands over it.

"Aqua, in my current form it will be of no use to me. You have done well to keep it safe, and I want you to continue to do so until I can use it again."

Her lip trembled, but she managed a smile, too. "Of course."

Eraqus addressed Terra next. "You told them we have a plan, correct?"

Terra nodded.

"Summon Riku. He should be here for this, too. It's time I told you about the prophecy."