From Tumblr to you...
Life use to be easy. If he wanted a drink he could walk to the bar. If his friends asked him out he could just go. If his stomach sang with a hunger that felt five days old and not an hours, he could just eat. But as he dished the sloppy soup of grains and milk into the ever weaving and avoiding target, he thought about stealing just one bite to curb the pain. But with each gumming bite and scooped up dribble, he steadied his resolve and counted down the minutes until he could be selfish.
"This is the member's training center, doubt you saw much of it. The locker room is over there, the water fountain, the equipment. Yep. Your basic stuff. Through there is the drill room, where you did initiation. If you have questions just ask. And clean up after yourself. And don't fuck it up with Four, okay?" He smiled briefly, sending her on her way — off balance and tentative
Sleep always felt like a right, something unalienable and completely within his control- the war excluded. And specifically, finding time for a few minutes or an hour was common between shifts and meals and friends had been easy. But there's a new dictator in town, one with iron fists and a pension for wailing and screaming at regular intervals. He is exhausted.
The right thing is to walk away. Let everyone get back to their routines and forget. Disappear and make it easier. They've all been pulled in and swallowed up and its just not fair. There's too many secrets, too many ignored fears, too much silence… Broken beyond repair.