Author's Note: Sorry this came later than expected.

Thoughts of the Past

JUNE 10th, 2011

"I told you already, I don't know where Rhonda is!" Shell said to me over the phone.

"Sorry for asking…" I say sarcastically.

"You've been asking me the same question over and over. For god's sake, you haven't event met her yet."

"That's why I've been trying to contact her but I haven't heard from her."

"Listen Mordecai, just drop it."

"What happened to all the encouragement you were giving me before?"

"I just can't do it anymore. You asking me about Rhonda is tiring for me."

"Is it so bad to want to talk to someone you care about?"

"I'm sorry Mordecai, but you should just stop."

"…Thanks for the advice," I said sarcastically, then I hung up.

There's still no sign of Rhonda, so I've been asking Shell if she's heard from her. And of course, she's been getting annoyed by it, but I can't help it. After all that's happened, I just want to talk to her, just to have some sign of hope. But I can't help but think of just how hopeless the situation is: She hasn't called for almost 2 weeks. What if she forgot about me or her feelings for just went away.

All I could do was sigh at how all of this seemed to go downhill.

How did I get in this mess?

The wind howled and the atmosphere was haunting. That's what to expect when you're standing at a grave. In this case, I was standing at High Fives Ghost's memorial. The pictures on the tree trunk were dinged slightly and some of the flowers for dying. It seemed so long ago since he passed. It reminded of when things for simpler, regular. Sure, monsters and super powered beings aren't regular, but at least then Rigby and I were able to shrug it off. But this situation with Margaret, Repar, Rhonda, has done its toll on my mind. I can't help but think what would've happened if I never talked badly about Repar to Margaret. Would me and her still be friends? Would I be able to just accept Repar and forget what he did? I act as if I've moved on from Margaret, but I can't help but think of what would've happened if I had kept my mouth shut.

The people we try to forget, are the people that haunt us the most.

And this thing with Rhonda; I wonder if we should've just stayed friends instead of having special feelings for each other.

And sometimes I just wonder why I couldn't just try to be with Adria. At she never strained my mind to a point of exhaustion. At least she always managed to put a smile on my face.

Hmph. Come to think of it, I should have, shouldn't I?

As much as this thought warmed my heart, I didn't want to think about love right now.

I just wish…things were regular again, before all of this. It's strange, ever since HFG passed, things seemed to get worse. No connection, just… it makes me think.

I heard someone walk up to me from behind. I turned around, it was Rigby.

"Hey man want to play Shooter Booter?" he asked. But then he paused, realizing I was standing at the memorial. "Oh sorry for interrupting."

"You didn't interrupt. I just needed some time to think," I said in a sad voice.

"Everything okay man?"

I never wanted to burden Rigby with the problems I have now. He's happy with Eileen and carefree. Who I am to have him worry about me?

But something came over me. I told him everything.

[xxxxxxxxxxxxx]

"She reacted that way?" Rigby questioned.

"Yep and now Margaret and I aren't friends any more. To be honest…she's really acting like…a bitch," I was kind of surprised at what I just said. Never thought I'd ever call Margaret a bitch.

"Well yeah, after how you say she's been asking."

"To add on that, there's still no word from Rhonda and Shell's mad at me."

"Jeez man, why didn't tell you me this before. If this has been going on for almost a month, you should've talked to me."

"…I couldn't. You have a happy life. You have Eileen and you don't have to worry about much. I didn't want to put my problems on you."

Rigby shrugged his shoulders. "You don't have worry about that. You do know everything you say to me goes in one ear and out the other," Rigby joked.

I laughed, "Jackass."

"But seriously man, and I know this will sound cheesy, but that's what friends are for. I listen and I help in any way I can. Have you thought of talking about this to Adria?"

"No, absolutely not. I…I love her too much to tell her about this. Plus, I don't like someone feeling pity for me. I have I feeling that's how she would react it I told her."

"I guess I understand that." Rigby put his hand on shoulder, of course having to go on his tip toes. "But you always have me to talk to."

I chuckled, "Never knew you'd be giving me advice for something."

"Things have changed."

"…Yeah…" At least the one good thing after HFG left was Rigby and Eileen getting together. He's matured but is also happier. That's the one thing that makes me feel good is that he's okay. It gives me hope things will be better.

I then heard Benson yell me name from the house.

"MORDECAI, I NEED TO TALK TO YOU!"

"Great," I huffed.

"Probably nothing," Rigby said.

"Maybe."

I walked into Benson's office. From what I've heard from other people, being called into the boss' office means firing, hiring, or promoting. I didn't want to guess.

I sat in the chair across from the desk and Benson sat in his chair.

"I've noticed how you've been acting Mordecai. You've been distant, quiet, just overall different," Benson said.

I put my head down.

"I have to admit, I didn't like it…but…"

I raised my head.

"Skips has been telling me what going on with you-"

My expression darkened.

"Now hold on Mordecai. I know you feel like it was supposed to be between you and him, but he obviously cares about you to bring this to my attention."

I relaxed.

"I don't usually do this. I usually wait a certain time but…I think you need a vacation."

"What?" I asked.

"You deserve it. Every man needs a break from a stressful time and this is one of those. Skips and I will pay for you transportation for anywhere you want to go, just as long as it's nowhere outrageous."

I couldn't believe. I guess behind that strict exterior, Benson really is a cool dude.

"I can't go anywhere that involves money for a good time," I said.

"Any family members to visit?" Benson asked.

"…I have a cousin in South Carolina."

"Great, that place is quiet and calm, just what you need. Two weeks and hopefully that can help get your spirits up."
I smiled, "Thanks Benson."

Maybe now I can have some peace.