Guys you are amazing. To all of you a great thank you for your wishes :o)
Cbloom2: I found the time :o) Thank you so much for you review. :o)
Pallada: My dear I don't know what to say despite the fact that I always love your reviews! Thank you for your ideas. I will leave Robert out of it a bit more okay? I can only assure you (as it's some kind of my job) in RL you have to be that pushing if the subject is up to it. In this case it actually is. Oh and who knows about the relapse...I do...and you already know me...;o) ;o) ;o) ;o) Hope you like the new chapter and I really hope to hear from you again. Greetings!
S.A.N.e.-but-inS.A.N.e: I posted again. :o) Hope you will enjoy the new chapter. Thank you so much!
Olimpia: You nearly kicked me out of my shoes with your review. WOW and thank you so so much! I LOVE your review! Your kind words made me even type faster :o)
I am really glad you liked the chapter. I am planing on getting more chapters that run deeper into the feelings of the characters, starting with the next one. Hope you will enjoy it and I can't wait to "read from you" so THANK YOU!
Dawn: Thank you so much for your review! How will Severide react? You can find out in this chapter :o) Hope you like it and as I wrote before Severide will play a big part in the next chapters as well.
Katha: Ha, endlich kann ich mal in deutsch antworten! Sehr schön :o) Vielen vielen Dank für deinen Review! Ob Severide sich weiter drückt?! :o) Viel Spaß beim lesen!
Chapter 18 - Friends
Severide felt the pressure on his shoulders grow as he sat in his car on his way to Lakeshore. He had even turned off his music. One thing he actually never did.
He had to think.
He had to find a way to deal with everything he had just seen. A way to deal with the condition his best friend was in. He needed to figure out if he was ready to face him right now.
Severide smacked a hand against the steering wheel in anger. How could he had yelled at him right after he came through. How could he just leave him there? How could he not have seen it all coming? He had never been the greatest friend but failing this badly really got to him.
Severide searched for a good parking lot before grabbing Casey's things. He never even knew how long Casey had to stay in ICU or in the hospital in general.
"Hey I am Lieutenant Severide, I just want to..." Severide exhaled deeply as the nurse greeted him at the entrance to ICU.
"I want to see Lieutenant Matt Casey." Severide said while the nurse gestured him to come in.
Severide hold his breath for a second as he watched his best friend and fellow Lieutenant in the hospital bed. He looked so small, so weak, so exhausted.
Severide felt happy about the fact that Christie was still by Casey's side. He knew that his sister always meant a lot to Casey. Seeing her there, supporting him in a so badly needed way was giving Severide a second to relax. Christie was there for her brother now.
Severide nodded as Casey spotted him behind the window. Now there was no turning back. He could not let him lay in there alone.
"Hey." Severide said before dropping Casey's sports bag on the table.
"Hey."
"Look Man I am sorry for screaming at you like that." Severide said hands burrowed deep down in the pockets of his jeans.
"No you don't need to apologize. I know you saw the mess at home. I can't remember much but I think it's bad. You where right and I am sorry for my actions." Casey said watching the surprised look on Severide's face.
"You know I am not good at these things..." Severide started just to get interrupted by Casey. "Don't okay? I am going to be fine." Casey said while Severide could see that Christie was taking his hand into hers.
"We talked a lot. I will not leave his side for a second anymore." Christie answered while Severide nodded slowly.
"Do you know how long you have to stay in here?"
"Yeah a couple more days. Wound got infected as well."
"Damn it Casey!"
"I know you said that before." Casey shot back a weak smile on his face.
"You know that I am...well...here for you as well, right?"
"Right."
"Should I stop by tomorrow?"
"Yeah that would be great."
"Alright. So see you then."
"Severide?"
"Yeah?"
"Thanks for getting my stuff."
"I cleaned up as well. You owe me a sixpack."
"I do." Casey nodded watching Severide leave with a small smile on his face.
He knew that Severide had his own problems dealing with everything that was going on right now.
"He is a great guy." Christie said after turning back to her brother.
"Yeah most of the time he is."
"Hey Christie can you give me my cell phone? I really need to call Dawson and thank her for everything."
"Dawson? The girl from the parole hearing?"
"I can't believe she really came."
"You know I am not into your personal live as much as a sister should be so is she your new girlfriend?"
"No she is just a college."
"Did you ever see anyone after Hallie?"
"No. It's difficult you know. We really spent a long time together."
"And there is nobody like her out there. I know what you are talking about. Do you remember the big big split up with Scott as I was 18."
"Oh don't remind me of that!" Casey said a smile on his face. How long he had never thought back of the old times. How long he had never talked about it.
In the evening Christie agreed to go home and get some rest while Casey grabbed his cell phone to give Dawson a call.
He was just about to push the call button as his door opened again.
"I just heard you are in here." Hallie said while Casey watched her in silence for a few seconds. "Yeah well. Needed some fresh blood in my veins."
"Matt this is serious."
"I know it is. Please skip the lecture I have been though enough of them the last two days okay?"
"I am in no position to give you a lecture."
"Yeah right."
"How are you feeling?"
"Are you in charge now?"
"Unfortunately yes. I really hoped to never be in this position again. You know I am not a fan of treating you and seeing you in here."
"Yeah me neither."
"So how are you feeling?"
"I am tired and beyond exhausted. My chest is still sore, my arm is burning and I feel like I am catching a cold."
"It's the infection. I am sure the medication is going to kick in fast. Let me get your temperature checked."
"Isn't this a nurses job."
"Actually it is. You are lucky." Hallie said with a smile while taking Casey's temperature.
"You have a fever. I think we need to give you some more medication. I am kinda worried that he infection is increasing. Heart rate is looking good. Do you get enough oxygen or do you feel short of breath?"
"I fell short of breath."
"Yeah your vitals are telling this too. Will you agree to wear a mask during the night?"
"If it's necessary." Casey just nodded before staying silent for a second.
"I am worried about you Matt." Hallie said while looking up from her chart.
"There is no reason for that."
"Yes it is and we both know it. What is going on with you? I really can't believe that you...you know...cut yourself and where nearly bleeding to death. That's not you Matt."
"I don't want to talk about it okay?"
"It's okay when you don't want to talk to me because of everything that had happened between us but I really hope you will find someone you can actually talk to."
"I did."
"Okay than it's okay with me."
"Casey!" Dawson answered her phone after the second beep.
"Hey Gabby."
"How are you feeling? I was there to visit you today but they told me that there is already someone staying with you the whole time and that you needed rest."
"Yeah my sister Christie is staying with me."
"How are you feeling?"
"I heard that it could be worse."
"Absolutely."
"Gabby I wanted to thank you. Like really thank you. You saved my life twice and I don't know how I will ever be able to thank you for..."
"You don't need to thank me."
"And I am sorry."
"For what?"
"For losing control like that. I don't think I need to explain what's going on. I don't even think that I can explain what's going on because I really don't get it myself."
"You have been through a lot and I think it's hard dealing with it."
"Yeah it is."
"Did Robert show up already?"
"He did. He is a great guy. I think I am going to see him a few times."
"That's great news Matt."
"Maybe. We will see."
"Is there anything I can do? Do you feel up for a visit or do you want to call when you are ready?" "No I...I would love if you would stop by when you got time."
"I will."
"Thanks Gabby."
"Get some rest. I will see you tomorrow."
Casey let his head sink back on the pillow grateful for the way she had just talked to him. There was no sign of frustration or anger in her voice. She wasn't blaming him for the things he had done just like Severide wasn't blaming him any longer.
Casey attached the oxygen mask back on his face and sucked in some fresh oxygen while he could feel the tears burning in his eyes again. He had great friends around and he knew that he could be thankful for that.
Sleep came faster than he had expected and the next thing Casey could remember was a cold hand on his forehead and a loud voice talking to him. He opened his eyes slowly noticing Hallie in the blur his vision was actually offering him.
"Matt can you hear me?" Hallie asked while Casey did his best to focus on her.
He could feel his whole body shaking. He was so cold but still he was sweating badly.
"Matt answer me. Come on! Stay with me!" Hallie begged while all Casey could concentrate on was the darkness that was slowly taking him back.
"Matt, no. Come on!" Hallie said while she got the syringe into Casey's IV.
The antibiotics had failed there job completely and Hallie could only assume that her college had underestimated the state Matt's infection had already been in.
"Severide." Kelly answered his phone sleepily.
"Kelly this is Hallie."
"Hallie? Is Casey alright?"
"That's the reason I am calling. Can you please come here?"
"I am right on my way."