Tonight's episode was just sickening! I wanted to vomit like twelve times, anyway enjoy the chapter.

Ch. 3 Don't Walk Away

(DREW)

I had no idea where I was going or what I was going to do, I just wanted to be away from everyone. At least everyone who was going to try and tell me my business, everyone who was going to ask me what was going on and ask me why I broke up with Clare, so I had to get away from my family and friends. I wandered a few miles away from the houses back towards school a little and out to the ravine. I started at one end and just started walking down along the water. I had no idea where I was going, or where the kids hung out, Owen once told me it wasn't far from the school but I didn't exactly feel like company so that's not where I was headed. I was still walking, caught up in my mind when I heard my name being called.

"Hey Torres."

I stop walking and look over to see Fitz with a couple of his buddies that do go to DeGrassi still, buddies that unlike Owen and Bianca haven't turned their lives around.

"Pissed off about your girlfriend leaving you?" Asks one of them, I think his name is Craig but he's not at school enough for me to remember.

"Clare left you?" Fitz snickers.

"She didn't leave me!" I growl marching up to Fitz and getting in his face. "I BROKE UP WITH HER UNDERSTAND?!"

"Dude chill, have a beer," Fitz says after I yell in his face.

I take the beer and sit down against a tree, opening the can and taking a few sips. "I thought you found God?" I question Fitz after a minute.

"I did, I would have punched you in the face for yelling at me before. I hold a steady job, I don't get into fights or threaten people with knives anymore, I haven't given up all my vices. We're drinking in the woods we're not hurting anybody," Fitz points out.

"So you pissed off that you broke up with Clare and she's dating Owen now?" One of them asks; I forget his name too.

"Clare left you for Owen?! Dude that has to hurt," Fitz laughs.

"Shut up, I don't want to talk about her or my so called friend," I respond in a bitter tone.

"Hey I feel you dude, I thought I'd get out of juvie and my friends would be happy to see me ya know? A few of them were," Fitz says waving his hand around, that's still clutching his beer, indicating his current drinking buddies, "but my two best friends wouldn't even come see me. I tried to tell them that I'd found God and turned my life around. They'll hardly even look at me when they come into the Dot. At least Clare forgave me but Eli started getting all weird and possessive and she avoided me to make him happy, then he goes and tries to kill himself and writes that creepy ass story."

"Yeah they're friends again you know, she always swore to me they were just friends now but maybe, maybe they were more. And Owen, he's supposed to be one of my best friends but the second I break up with Clare he moves in on her! Some friend," I grouse as I finish off my beer and take another from the cooler.

"Don't you think you should slow down?" Fitz asks.

"I think you should mind your own damn business!" I bark back at him.

We sit for a while talking, mostly trashing people at DeGrassi, mostly Owen, Bianca and Clare. I lose track of time but I drink three more beers during this time.

"Hey I gotta get to work, make sure he gets home guys," Fitz tells his friends.

"Yeah sure," one of them says and then Fitz takes off.

"I know she's lying, she has to be lying," I mutter as I finish my fourth beer and stand up a little wobbly to go to the cooler. "Hey we're out of beer," I slur to the other two.

"I've got something a little stronger," one of them remarks pulling a bottle of clear liquid from his pocket and handing it to me.

I take the bottle and open it, the fumes make my eyes water and smell is very strong. Holding it to my lips I take a sip, my face scrunches when it hits my tongue, burning my throat on the way down. I think it's vodka but it tastes like it was mixed with lighter fluid or something. I sit down and we pass around the bottle, we're mostly silent aside from the occasional remark or random noise.

"I never should've sharted dating her; she's my best brother's friend, no wait that's not right. My brother's best friend that's a girl, you should never date your Adam's friends 'cause they are just trouble," I slur and the other two start laughing. "You know what the worst part is? Huh? You know what totally fucking sucks about this whole fucking fucked up sitiation, I shtill love that girl. I Andrew Torres," I say standing up with the bottle in one hand and the other over my heart; I take a huge swig before passing the bottle. "Me Andrew Drew Torres, that's me you know, I still love Clare Diana whose mom is a bitch Edwards. I still love Clare, that's the worsht part of this whole thing!" I tell them stumbling a few steps and taking back the bottle before one of them takes another sip. "I still love Care…wait dats not her name. Her name rhymes with Care! I love you CareClare!"

Suddenly the world starts to get dizzy, the trees are shifting, the ground is moving, I fall forward and then the lights go out! I wake up late Tuesday morning, my head is throbbing, my stomach hurts and there's a horrible smell. My eyes open slowly and I look around, I appear to be in a van, an old one with a mattress in back. I sit up slowly and groan as even that movement hurts my head. I feel like I'm going to barf so I find the handle and rush out, I see a few kids sitting around a fire pit, the backseat of a car that was ripped out and some logs. It vaguely occurs to me in the back of my head that I must be at the ravine where the kids hang out. I don't really think about it as I get through the trees a little way and lean against one just as everything in my stomach comes up again. Kneeling down on all fours as I hack up what feels like everything I've eaten in the last week. I finish and lean against a tree, groaning as I feel like death and then I hear an angry and slightly distressed voice. I don't feel like moving but the voice happens to belong to the girl I love so I get up and start walking back fast.

"No you're a pig and totally disgusting, I don't even want to look at you!" Clare snaps.

"Aw come on baby you seem like you need to party, I'll show you a real good time," some ravine scum says with his arm around her waist.

"Let go of me!" Clare demands.

"GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF OF HER!" I scream at the guy hitting him as hard as I can and he lets go of her.

He falls to the ground as Clare gasps, the guys is buzzed and slightly dazed but I'm so fueled by rage I don't even care. I sit on him and just start punching him as hard as I can, hitting his face again and again! I don't even care when his nose starts spurting blood getting it on my fist and clothes.

"Drew stop!" Clare begs on the verge of tears but I keep punching the guy. "Andrew stop you're going to kill him!" She shrieks grabbing my fist before I can hit him again.

I yank my fist back looking at her, standing up from the bloody boy now on the ground I take a step toward Clare. She takes a step back from me ending up backed up against Fitz.

"What are you even doing here?!" I growl at her.

"Looking for you," she says crying a little, "Adam called last night and said you were missing. I was worried, no one could find you."

"JUST STAY AWAY FROM ME CLARE! GO BACK TO OWEN AND LEAVE ME ALONE!"

I scream at her and turn away, too angry and ashamed to look back at her. I feel like hell but I take off walking as fast as I can to get away from Clare, my coat is gone, I just notice as it starts to rain and I become soaked to the bone.

"HEY DREW!" Fitz yells. I ignore him and keep walking, "Dude slow up, what was all that about? What the hell is wrong with you?" Fitz questions.

"Just leave me alone Fitz," I growl at him.

"Where are you going?" He asks ignoring my last request.

"I don't know, somewhere else," I respond sharply.

"Come on you need some breakfast and I know a place we can go," he tells me.

Since I don't have any better idea I go with Fitz, we walk to the Dot first. He goes in through the back and tells me to wait in the alley; he comes back out with some breakfast. Black coffee which is gross but at least he got me a couple of croissants to soak up the acid in my stomach.

"I need to get off the streets, my mom's probably looking for me, or got the cops out looking for me," I remark as we start walking.

"I told you I know a place," Fitz says.

We walk about a mile and end up near an abandoned train bridge. It looks like other kids hang out here sometime but right now we're alone. We sit on a couple of crates to finish our coffee and eat breakfast. When we're done eating we keep sitting there, silent and me stewing in anger.

"What are you even doing here? Why stay with me?" I question Fitz after a short time.

"I didn't want you to get hurt or something, you don't know all the backdoor places in this town," Fitz replies. I just shrug and lean back against the stone wall. "I have to get to work, come on I'll get you home," Fitz comments after a few hours.

"I can't go home, just leave me alone I'll find my own way," I respond.

"Drew you should really…" Fitz starts but I interrupt him.

"JUST LEAVE ME!" I holler at him.

"Just be careful," he says slowly sounding reluctant to go.

He walks off, looking back at me a couple of times but he's finally out of sight. I sit there alone wrapped up in my angry thoughts, convincing myself that Clare had cheated on me, that it wasn't my baby, that I had every right to be angry and l had every right to leave her to take care of it on her own. While my anger is fuming I hear voices, voices of teenagers coming this way and I realize that the rain has stopped. A small group of teenagers appears from around the corner, four guys and two girls. They sit down and start passing around beers, one of the guys offers me a beer and I take it. Then another, and another, and another until I'm so drunk I can hardly see straight. Which in my drunken state seems like perfect time to start walking, I stumble around a bit, it's gotten dark now, and manage to find my way back to DeGrassi and I keep going. Stumbling onto the front lawn of Clare's house, I recognize her mom's plotted plants on the stoop and the window planter box that Glen put in.

"HEY YOU BITCH!" I scream at the house picking up a plant, in a pot with daisies painted on it, and tossing it through the kitchen window!

Glass shatters with a loud crash! Glen, Jake and Helen come running outside but Clare isn't with them.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?! I knew you were trouble, I never wanted Clare to date you!" Helen snarls at me.

"Drew what's wrong with you?" Jake inquires coming over to me.

"WHERE IS SHE?" I yell at Jake.

"She doesn't live here anymore Drew. You're family's been looking for you, you need to go home," Jake tells me.

"SCREW OFF!" I yell at him curling my fist and taking a swing but I slip on the wet snowy grass, fall forward into the snow and go unconcious.

(CLARE)

I get out of a nice hot shower, wrap myself in a towel and go back to my room to get pajamas on. As soon as I have my towel off I hear my phone ringing. I expect it to be Drew, he always did seem to know when I was naked, even when we weren't anywhere near each other. When I see the caller ID I find that it's the wrong Torres brother as it's Adam who's calling me.

"Adam?"

"Have you heard from Drew?" Adam questions.

"No, not since this morning at school," I reply, "what's wrong?"

"He's missing," Adam tells me.

"Missing?! What do you mean missing?!" I exclaim as my chest gets tight with worry for Drew.

"He's only been gone for a couple of hours; we're just calling around to see if anyone has seen him. Dad and Dallas are out looking for him, we'll find him he can't have gone that far. Just if he calls or comes by call us will you?" Adam requests.

"Yeah of course, call me if you find him please?" I tell him.

"I will," Adam says and hangs up.

I quickly get dressed in jeans, a long sleeve top and my fuchsia wool coat. Snow boots last I grab my purse and start running down the stairs.

"I'll be back," I call into the kitchen as I head for the door.

"Whoa! Where do you think you're going? It's minus twelve outside and snowing again and you don't have a car," Lucas points out shutting the front door before I can make it out. He's dressed for work and has to leave soon but his shirt isn't buttoned up exposing his white undershirt.

"Drew is missing I'm going to look for him," I reply as Evelyn comes out from the kitchen.

"Isn't Drew the baby's father?" Evelyn asks.

"Yes and Adam just called and said he was missing I need to find him," I reiterate getting frustrated that they won't let me go.

"You can't go wandering around the streets in the cold and dark by yourself Clare you're pregnant! People are looking for him, they will find him, you need to stay here with Mom and relax. I have to get to work, do not leave this house," Lucas asserts.

"But…" I start to argue.

"Lucas is right honey you need to take care of yourself; it's only going to make things worse if you get sick. Someone will find Drew, his family is out looking for him they will find him," Evelyn says taking my hand and pulling me away from the door.

She sits me on the sofa and hands me the TV remote, I sigh and turn on the TV. Lucas finishes getting ready for work and hugs me before he leaves reminding me not to leave the house. I watch TV with Evelyn for about three hours before she goes to bed but I can't sleep, I'm just worried about Drew. The hour gets later and Adam hasn't called yet. I fall asleep on the sofa watching TV sometime after one in the morning. I wake up when Lucas lifts me into his arms and starts carrying me upstairs. He lies me in bed and I'm still clutching my phone, I wait until Lucas is out of the room before I check my phone again. Adam still hasn't called or even texted, I bite my lip fighting back the tears I just want to know that Drew's okay.

I wake up to my alarm Tuesday morning feeling exhausted and even more worried because I still haven't heard from Adam. Getting up slowly and dragging myself to the washroom for my morning bout of vomiting, I skip breakfast and take so long to get ready I get to school late even with Lucas driving me. I get a note from the office and head to class, Adam isn't in class, they must still be looking for Drew, this only makes me more worried.

When class lets out I stash my backpack in my locker and go outside, I don't want to be at school, I want to know how the search is going. Then for whatever reason the idea comes to me to check for Drew in the lot, the part of the ravine near the school where the kids hang out. I look back at Officer Turner but he isn't paying attention to me so I slip into the woods and start heading there. It's fairly quiet this early in the morning, I only see a few guys sitting or standing around. I emerge from the trees and a guy sizes me up licking his lips.

"Hey Baby you looking for me?" He asks his words slurring just slightly he must be a little drunk.

"No I'm looking for Drew Torres have you seen him?" I question.

"Nope but you got a nice rack wanna stay here and party with me? I got something you can look for, it's hidden in my pants," he laughs in a slimy tone.

"No you're a pig and totally disgusting, I don't even want to look at you!" I snap at him.

"Aw come on baby you seem like you need to party, I'll show you a real good time," he says in a voice dripping with lust and creepiness as he steps up and puts his arm around my waist.

"Let go of me!" I bark at him trying to shove him away.

"GET YOUR FUCKING HANDS OFF OF HER!" Drew yells at the guy punching him with so much force he lets go of me.

I gasp as the guy falls to the ground! Drew sits on him and goes crazy punching the guy as hard as he can! Drew's fists connecting with the guys face again and again! The guy's nose starts spouting blood like a fountain but Drew is still punching him!

"Drew stop!" I plead feeling tears crowd my eyes as I think I might be watching Drew kill this guy. "Andrew stop you're going to kill him!" I shriek grabbing Drew's fist so he'll stop punching him.

Drew looks up at me, his deep blue eyes look into my light blue ones with hate. He pulls his fist out of my hand like my touch hurts him, he takes a step toward me and I'm afraid he might hit me next so I take a step back. I back up into a chest and hands rest on my arms softly, I don't need to see to know that it's Fitz; he still uses the same after shave.

"What are you even doing here?!" Drew barks at me.

"Looking for you," I reply timidly as a few tears slip from my eyes, "Adam called last night and said you were missing. I was worried, no one could find you."

"JUST STAY AWAY FROM ME CLARE! GO BACK TO OWEN AND LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Drew yells at me then he turns away and takes off farther into the ravine. He storms off and the skies open up, rain begins pouring down washing over me, I wish it could wash away the hurt I'm feeling.

"What happened with you two? I don't remember Drew being so pissed off all the time," Fitz remarks.

I turn around and look up at the brown eyed freckled boy; we share a past in a way. We had one date that he blackmailed me into and it ended with a poisoning and Eli being threatened with a knife. Fitz went to juvie for three months and found God which brought us closer in a way as we now had something in common. He also works at the Dot so we see him around, I guess he's sort of a friend now but we don't exactly hang out or even talk. I just hope that I can count on him for something very important right now.

"Fitz please if you ever truly cared about me, if you really found God then please go after him. Watch out for him; keep him from hurting himself or someone else. I'm worried about him, he's…just please watch out for him," I beg the former bully.

"Fine but I gotta work tonight, now get back to school before someone else hits on you," Fitz orders.

He takes off running after Drew and I turn to get back to school. I barely make it back to the picnic tables when I sit down and start crying. The harder I cry the harder it seems to rain, I just sit there in the rain with my head in my arms and sobbing. Everything is such a mess, a couple of days ago my world was blissful, not perfect or anything but I was happy. I still lived at home, I had a wonderfully sweet boyfriend who didn't explode at the smallest of things and I hadn't confirmed that I was pregnant. One tiny pink + had totally shattered my entire world.

"Clare what the hell are you doing out here?" Owen exclaims pulling me up from the picnic table. "It's pouring and freezing, you're going to get sick," he admonishes me taking off his Ice Hounds coat and putting it around me. "Come on I'm taking you to Lucas' place."

"I found Drew," I tell him when we get in his car.

It's not until he turns on the car and the heater that I realize how cold I truly am. The heater hasn't warmed up yet so it's blowing out cold air, I curl up trying to warm myself with my body heat.

"Take off your wet coat," Owen orders. "Where did you find Drew?" He questions as I take off my wet coat and wrap myself in his Ice Hounds jacket.

"At the lot, he went crazy and tried to kill this guy that hit on me. I made him stop and he stormed off, I had Fitz follow him," I tell Owen with chattering teeth.

"I'll call Drew's house and tell them but I'm getting you home first," he says.

The heater quickly gets hot and I start to warm up. Owen parks out front of Lucas' house and he runs around to open my car door for me.

"Shouldn't you be at school? Why the hell are you soaked?" Lucas inquires opening the front door before I can get my key.

"You get out of your wet clothes and go get in bed, you'll be lucky if you don't catch pneumonia," Owen scolds me.

I go upstairs and change into dry pajamas wrapping up under the covers. I don't feel sick and I feel much better now that I'm warm but now I'm feeling the lack of sleep. I fall asleep while Owen is still downstairs talking to Lucas. I wake up later that afternoon after a nightmare about Drew being so mad he just starts hitting everyone in his way and when he can't bring himself to hit me he walks off and I never see him again.

"How do you feel?" Lucas asks when I come downstairs.

"Better now that I've slept but still worried about Drew, any word?" I question.

"No but you should eat and Owen said he'd swing by after practice," Lucas tells me.

"I'm not hungry," I shake my head sitting at the table.

"You need to eat something, fruit or a bagel or something," Lucas insists.

He gets up, grabs me a yogurt from the fridge and puts it in front of me with a spoon. I eat the yogurt slowly and we go to the sofa to watch TV. At about four I call Adam but he says they haven't heard anything yet. The doorbell rings a little after five when I'm eating dinner with Lucas and Evelyn.

"Hey Owen want to join us for dinner?" Lucas asks.

As soon as I hear Owen's name I get up from the table and go to him, the look on his face is not a happy one and I begin to panic.

"What is it? Is Drew hurt? He's not dead is he? Tell me he's not dead?" I beg as I fear the worst.

"Drew's not hurt but he's been arrested."

Update next Tuesday picking up from around here.