Hear me out! I was going to upload last night but my internet connection died on me at the perfect moment. So, with some super cool flash drive technology, here I am!
And before I go any further...
I'm so sorry that I didn't upload last Friday! I fell asleep earlier than I planned, which was before I got the chance to get on the computer. I didn't get up until four am, and that's usually my uploading time.
I am almost cried. Like, I was so upset because I had been looking forward to typing this chapter all week. Not because it was going to be my new favorite or something, but because I just wanted to type.
And then I was going to have to make you all wait another week. :p
But I am back! And I have bad news..:
I got assigned this HUGE English project this week. It's so detailed, like, everything has to be exactly like in the instructions. The whole thing goes down to the font size and style. I mean, my gosh…It's kind of freaking me out so I may not upload next week or the week after that. I'm not saying I won't, I'm just saying there's a good chance I will have isolated myself in a room with papers, markers, my laptop and a bunch of other project stuff that is needed by the time next weekend comes around. That's what happened with my last project. I'm not kidding. I came out of my room looking like a hoodlum. And I didn't procrastinate either, I stopped procrastinating on projects a long time ago. It's just that projects don't like me. At all. So, I'm not too excited about this project…stupid English class…what do I need it for? My grammar is fine!
Most of the time…
Anyways, it's review answer time! Yay! Seriously, I practically live for this moment. This little section takes me about thirty minutes every time so, just in case you don't think that I think about my answers…I do. Like I said in a previous chapter, I am not good with words in a conversation.
You guys I have to sneeze!
Sorry, I'm bored..
I should stop rambling and get to the Review Replies already:
nuttierthansquirelpoop – That means I did good! Thank you! :)
Dancingchocolatesmudge – Yeah, same here. :/ Thank you! :)
Zoe Snow – Haha, it's okay, I usually ramble on like a grade school kid. :) I can't say…I might give away something! I'm glad you liked it. :)
CaffeinatedKitty – Aww, I'm sorry. :( Well it's nice you can relate to them...I mean they're fictional characters, but still. It's good. Aww! I'm going to cry, how old were your brother and sister when they finally understood. Haha, yeah the song is short, but it's nice. Glad you're better. :)
book lover – That's what I was aiming for, and thank you. :)
The Light Holder – Don't die! Too many people are dying! Anyways, thank you so much, I greatly appreciate it. :)
Justawriter7 – Aww really? That is really sad, I'm sorry. :( I'm glad you liked it thanks. :)
Pottergirl1 – You're welcome! *huggglez back* Ooo, that's complicated. Stay strong! Tell your friends to drop it and who cares if he doesn't like you or texted you back. That just means he can't handle your awesomeness…or he was just so excited that you texted him he obviously fainted. Good luck. ;)
FreezingSapphire—Cool! I get to go around speaking Japanese and freaking people out! Yeah! What's the other stuff? Is it 'sad' in some other language too?
Dude with the Tattoo – Thank you! Anytime, I'm really glad I helped you out. :)
Was the last chapter seriously that sad? I mean…I'm really sorry about making it so sad, but I'm kind of happy because I was scared it wasn't sad enough! Well, I hope this chapter cheers you up from the last one. ;)
Guys, guess what…I was cold, so I turned my blanket into a Snuggie.
Just brilliant! :D
I am in a surprisingly good mood…anyways…Story time! Yay! :D
The Isadora Diaries:
Home:
Saturday, March 17th
I hate depression. I mean, to me, it is one of the most evil things in the world. Depression is one the main reasons why people start doing drugs, obtain eating disorders, and, in the worst case scenario, commit suicide. Now I know my friends aren't going to end up doing any of that, it just bothers me to see my friends feeling such an evil thing.
It's not healthy for them and it's not healthy for me either. Let me explain:
A simple fact about me: I am not a morning person. I can't stand mornings. I just want to crawl up in my bed and sleep but I can't because mornings want me to wake up by shining it's overly happy sun through my oversized window.
Not that there's anything wrong with happiness, I just don't like waking up to it in the morning.
Come to think of it, I don't like waking up to anything in the morning….
Anyways…
I'm not a morning person, so I usually get to school feeling kind of down. But you know what? That's okay.
The best thing about my friends is that they are all just big blasts of sun shine waiting to blow up fireworks and explode in your face. They are these big balls of jumping energy and that energy cannot be contained for very long. These certain friends in particular are Bea, Katelyn, Jo, Macey, and Kim.
Klaus isn't exactly an explosion all the time. Sometimes he can be, but other times he's just…Klaus (not saying that's a bad thing, because Klaus is awesome). Even though he doesn't usually explode sun shine, I still love his presence.
Violet is more like a star explosion in your face. She's a bit more terrifying than exciting…but that's why we love her!
Quigley and Duncan are just weird. Period.
Anyways…
I got to school on Monday feeling down as usual. I didn't expect Bea or Klaus to be there to cheer me up (and they weren't) and even if they were at school, I would have to cheer them up. Not saying I would've done a very good job, considering that I was upset about the death of Richard myself.
Whether they were at school or not, I was relying on my other friends to explode bright sun explosions and make me just as happy as them. Unfortunately, that didn't happen.
When I got to school, I had to explain to my friends why Bea and Klaus weren't at school and what had happened the previous Friday. That just made their explosions fizzle out and me more down than usual. To make things worse all they worried about the whole week was how Bea, Klaus and Violet (they know her, too) were doing and how they were coping and blah blah blah...
I guess they are so good at being happy that they don't know the best way to get rid of worry is to eat chocolate!
No, scratch that, that's depression.
I don't know what it is, really, but I do know that repeatedly talking about something you're worried about isn't going to help you at all. It's a fact.
It may not be a scientific proven fact, but we don't need scientists to come to that conclusion for us. They already know everything else; we should come to some conclusions ourselves.
Why do I keep getting off topic?
So, basically, I had a depressing week. It was not very fun.
I went to go visit Klaus and Violet a couple of times, but they were never really in the mood to talk. In fact, Klaus wouldn't talk at all.
I went to go see Bea too. She seemed okay, but I could tell by the look in her eye that she was definitely not okay.
Bea was never good at expressing the emotion of sadness. When something bad happens that make any normal girl cry Bea holds it in and acts completely normal. I know her well enough to tell when it's all an act and when it's not. There were only two other times she was this way. One was when her first dog died a couple years back. The other time was when her mother was killed in a car wreck when we were in fifth grade. She cried that day, of course. However, after that day she acted as if nothing happened. I knew something was wrong. A couple of days after her mother's funeral, Bea spent the night at my house. We decided to watch the movie A Series of Unfortunate Events because it had been a while since either of us had seen it.
You know, I have to say that my favorite part in that whole movie is when Violet is reading the letter that got lost in the mail. I can't help but cry every time I watch that part. That certain night, neither could Bea. She completely lost it.
Everything finally came out, all her problems, her stress, her missing her mom, everything. After that night, Bea still wasn't over the death of her mom. Who would expect her to be? But she was more contempt and there wasn't any sadness in her eyes anymore.
I planned to do the same thing last night.
"I don't know, Isadora, I'm not in a movie mood."
"Oh, come on, Bea! Duncan will be there! I made him promise he would." I knew that would get her to come, if nothing else worked.
Bea squealed and grabbed her nearest stuffed animal—a blue elephant. She squeezed it and, I swear, the poor little thing was suffocating.
I didn't tell her what movie we'd be watching, because I was afraid she might refuse. I just kept it a secret. We skipped down to the Clarke's house and knocked on the door. Violet opened it, looking almost normal. She seemed a little sad, but she didn't look so tired anymore. You'd think that after her grandfather died, she would've lost more sleep. No, she was actually sleeping.
Anyways, we invited her and Klaus to come over and watch the movie. I didn't tell them what it was either, that would mean Bea finding out what the movie was and I was worried she might object to it if she knew. I walked next to Klaus, behind Violet and Bea, as we walked across the street to my house. I tried starting a conversation with him, but he wouldn't say anything. His depression was getting to me and making me feel more negative than I already had been. I wasn't just upset about his grandfather, I was upset for him. Actually, I was upset for him, Violet, Bea, Sunny, everyone really. I just wanted to knock some happiness into all of them so they would stop moping around like zombies and start happily jumping around like The Littlest Elf!
But I knew that wouldn't happen.
As much as I wanted to, I couldn't make our parents watch the movie. They needed to be comforted just as much as their kids. Unfortunately, they probably wouldn't understand how a movie about unfortunate events could make them feel better and refuse to watch it. It was considered a children's movie to them. Mr. Snicket watches it on occasion, but it's been a while for him and he hasn't been in the mood for anything lately.
Since I knew I couldn't get everyone to watch the movie I decided that if I cheered up their kids then, maybe, they'd rub off on their parents and we might all get better a little quicker.
Eventually, Quigley, Violet, Duncan, Bea, Klaus, and I were huddled together in the TV room. I had just gotten comfortable between Bea and Klaus when I remembered that I had to put the movie in.
Don't you hate it when that happens?
So I put the movie in and skipped the commercials to the main menu. Then everyone started screaming at me to hurry up and press play because the music that plays on the menu and ending credits is so freaky!
I had to wait through the whole entire movie to see if my plan would work, but when we finally got to that certain part; I knew the wait was worth it.
"'Dearest children - since we've been abroad we have missed you all so much. Certain events have compelled us to extend our travels. One day, when you're older, you will learn all about the people we have befriended and the dangers we have faced. At times the world can seem an unfriendly and sinister place, but believe us when we say that there is much more good in it than bad. All you have to do is look hard enough. And what might seem to be a series of unfortunate events may, in fact, be the first steps of a journey. We hope to have you back in our arms soon, darlings, but in case this letter arrives before our return, know that we love you. It fills us with pride to know that no matter what happens in this life, that you three will take care of each other, with kindness and bravery and selflessness, as you always have. And remember one thing, my darlings, and never forget it: that no matter where we are, know that as long as you have each other, you have your family. And you are home.'"
Bea was hugging her knees to her chest and I could tell she was silently crying. Violet was crying too and I couldn't tell if it was Quigley or Duncan that was sniffling. Klaus just had his hands up to his face. His eyes looked a bit red and he kept on wiping them. I, myself, was pretty much just bawling my eyes out. Like I said, I can't go through that scene without crying, I just can't do it. Even if I could, I still would've been crying and it would've been for the same reason as Bea's.
I turned the TV off after the movie ended. We all just sat there in silence with only small candles illuminating small parts of the room.
No one said anything.
This wasn't a depressing silence. It was almost a feeling of relief.
It wasn't long before I was falling asleep and leaned against Klaus. I was half-asleep so it's a possibility I dreamt this part, but…
When I did Klaus wrapped his arm around and whispered to me the first thing I heard him say in days, "You're brilliant."
The next day, we all woke up on the couch in a tangled heap. We were all just laying on top of each other in some way. I don't even remember how we got into such a position. The six of us untangled ourselves from each other and sat back in the spots we were sitting in last night.
Klaus stretched and yawned; He looked at me and gave me a sleepy smile, another thing that hasn't occurred in a week.
I was so happy, I almost kissed him.
Almost.
"Hey guys!" Bea said cheerfully, lying across mine and Klaus's laps. "I had the weirdest dream where food ate people!"
After that, we were almost completely back to our normal selves. With the progress we made the night before, I knew it wouldn't be too long before we were all okay. Especially with the way we were acting. We were talking and laughing like normal. We hardly even mentioned the previous night. We only talked about it when Violet mentioned how much she loved the movie and how a good cry can make one feel better in the most darkest situations, even though nothing has been done to resolve it at all.
She didn't use those exact words, I kind of revised it from what she said because it took me a bit to understand what she was talking about when she said her version.
We all agreed with her and carried on with a normal day.
I never enjoyed us all being together so much.
With them, I definitely felt like I was home.
I know what you're thinking: Of course she's home, she's in her house!
That wasn't the kind of home I meant. Or she meant…
I meant a different home. Like a comfortable home, for all those who didn't understand.
Well, I hope you liked it. :)
Don't tell me I'm the only one who can't stand listening to that creepy music in the menu and ending credits of the ASOUE movie! It's so creepy! And please don't tell me I'm the only one that cries at the letter part! I need understanding people!
"Come stop your crying; it'll be alright. Just take my hand, hold it tight. I will protect you from all around you. I will be here, don't you cry…."
~ You'll Be In My Heart sung by Phil Collins
Sweetest song I've ever heard. Just saying.
I actually finished a lot earlier than I usually did, tonight! It's only 1:30 instead of 4:00! :D But I have to upload tomorrow because my internet's down. :p
Goodnight everyone! :)
;)