Turned Into Storms

Loki fought down a wave of nausea as he stepped over a bludgeoned corpse of yet another Asgardian soldier. The hall was scattered with them, but other than their bloodied faces staring up at him, he was alone.

The dark elves clearly were without mercy. Loki's stomach dropped further when he thought about what the Dark Elves would do to the women and children once they reached the outside gates, if they had not already.

This is my doing, Loki thought sorrowfully. I brought this upon them.

He could not stop himself from thinking that if he had not been to taken by Thanos' lies that he might have foreseen this. This never would have happened. It was not something he had wanted to happen.

Asgard had disowned him. He was no longer one of them…but he did not wish in his heart to see her plundered like this.

But what could he do now? Where was he to go? What side was he even on? Loki could not begin to even guess what his next move was. He did not even know where he was going in this moment.

Loki was stepping around the body of another dead guard as he contemplated this when he suddenly doubled over in pain.

He dug his fingers into the side of his skull, his mouth open in a silent scream as the vision tore through his already fragile mind.

When the vision cleared, though his mind's eye he could see the hall of Valhalla. But it was in ruins. The wall was blown out on one side and Loki realized distractedly that this must have been where the first explosion went off.

There were shadows around him, but he could not focus on them. It was as if he were in a dream he could not control. The shadows made a way for him and when he looked ahead he saw the battle being fought around the ruins of the hall.

He saw Thor. Loki felt his name bubble up to his lips, but he could not utter a sound. His mind's eye was already drifting away from him and directing his attention to something else.

That's when Loki saw Odin. He was swinging Gungnir around like the young warrior he used to be in their bedtime stories. Even though those stories were usually about his war with the Frost Giants.

Loki felt mixed emotions about seeing him there.

He had loved Odin once. Loved him like a father. But now he was just a liar. Loki should feel glad. He was getting what he thought he wanted. What Odin deserved. Payback for his sins and the pain he had caused him…But it was too high a cost. Loki didn't want it. He never really did.

He saw that now. But he had realized that too late…too late.

Not soon after he had spotted Odin, Loki felt himself drawing near.

No, I don't want to be here! Loki thought, trying to shake the vision away. But it had him in an iron grip, there was no escaping this.

There was something in his hand. He could not look down or bring in into his sight to see it, but the weight and the feel of it was all too familiar. It was the scepter.

What am I doing?

Loki's heart began to race and he felt his breath coming short.

NO, NO, NO. NO! Loki screamed in his head, fighting harder than ever, though it was useless. He tried to call out to Odin, to warn him, but he was not the one in control of his voice.

Loki continued to draw near with a deadly intent. He heard his name, somewhere close, but he could not see who had yelled it. But he did not have to. He knew it was Frigga.

Loki's heart clenched. Was he in his body? What was happening?

Loki was upon Odin. He was so close the he could have reached out and touched his shoulder.

Odin turned quickly, Gungnir raised in his hand, ready to spear his next attacker.

But when he saw Loki standing there, his battle hardened face dropped in surprise. The look in his eye changed from shock, to wonder in a matter of moments as he began to lower Gungnir to his side. Through his mind's eye Loki saw him and regret filled his chest. In that moment Loki could see the pain written in the lines of Odin's weary face.

There was an ocean of mistakes between them, all born of good intentions but they all had turned into storms of ill events that neither of them knew how to weather.

And Loki was sorry. If only he had a way of saying that now…

Loki felt his arm draw back. He wished he could close his eyes so he would not have to see the look on Odin's face, but he couldn't. This was Thanos' gift to him, and he would have to endure every second of it.

The blade of the scepter plunged into Odin's heart.

There was nothing he could do to stop it. He could do nothing while he ripped the scepter out of his chest but watch helplessly as his once father's expression turned to one of utter betrayal.

It's not me, it's not me, it's not me, Loki whimpered over and over again.

Odin sank to his knees, blood pouring from the hole in his armor in angry red streams. Loki's vision began to waver as Odin slipped from his view. He was looking across the hall where he suddenly met Thor's eye.

Thor was screaming.

Loki felt his lips pull into a smile as he turned and walked away, leaving Odin to die alone in the ruins of his hall.

Then the vision was over.

Loki placed a steading hand on the blood splattered wall while a soundless, wrenched sob escaped his lips, doubling him over and nearly bringing him down to his knees.

Odin was dead. Loki knew he was. He was not glad of it. He had not wanted him to die. And now he was dead thinking that he was murdered by the child he had brought into his home and raised as one of his own.

Loki had killed him in front of Frigga and in front of Thor.

Thor!

Loki slowly pulled himself erect, the trail of tears down his face glistening in the torchlight.

Thor would think that he done it. Loki had escaped from his cell, killed two guards, and it was his visage standing there for all to see as he killed Odin.

It was too perfect. How could he convince Thor it was not him? How could he face Frigga?

Loki couldn't do it. He would never be able to convince them. He was a liar, how could they ever trust him?

But he had to try. He could never go on if Thor thought that he was the one that murdered their father. He would rather die than have him think that.

Righting himself, Loki wiped the tears from his face and left the desolation behind as he ran to find Thor.

He was going to find him. And when he did, everything was going to be alright.