Rick had pounded at our window early the next morning, and by sunrise the group was ready to head out.
"Everybody grab a weapon." Rick said to the group, unfurling a hunting kit on the hood of a nearby car. The group stared at it momentarily, glancing between the knives at the sheriff who stood before them.
"These aren't the kinds of weapons we need." Andrea said smugly. "What about the guns?"
"We've been over that. Daryl, Rick and myself are carrying. We can't have people popping off rounds every time a tree rustles." Shane said tiredly from where he leaned against the RV. I sigh internally, growing tired of Andrea's constant nagging about the guns. It had been non-stop all day yesterday and to be honest I was still sore at her from the CDC. Shane had finally silenced her about the gun issue and now Daryl laid out the game plan.
"The idea is to take the creek up about 5 miles, turn around and come back down the other side. Chances are she'll be by the creek. It's her only landmark." Daryl shifted under the weight of his bow and I eyed him intently. Everyone began to grab up a knife and I watched them bitterly. Rick had rallied the troops, taking everyone except for Dale, T-Dog and myself.
You have to stay behind to make sure T-Dog doesn't take a turn for the worse, you're the only one who can make sure he pulls through. Rick had told me after I was adamant I was to go with them. But he won out because I knew deep down that he was right.
"Keep quiet and stay sharp. Keep space between you, but always stay within sight of each other." Rick said gravely to each of us. His eyes settled on me and I crossed my arms childishly. Rick frowned at me before turning to Dale. "Dale, keep on those repairs. We've got to get the RV ready to move."
"We wont stay here a minute longer than we have to." Dale reassured him. "Good luck out there."
Daryl walked over to me, standing next to me, shifting uncomfortably.
"I'm sorry you ain't comin'. I'd feel much better if ya was with us." I looked up at him and smirked.
"Are you gonna miss me, Daryl Dixon?" I teased. The man chuckled from where he stood next to me, shaking his head.
"Naw, I jus know you're a good shot. Two crossbows are always better'n one." I knew he was only joking. Whether he'd admit it or not, he would miss me, and nudged my shoulder gently, as if to reinforce my suspicions.
"You be careful out there, same as I said yesterday." I offered hesitantly, kicking around a few pebbles. Daryl watched me quietly, his gaze following mine as we both now stared at the rocks I was kicking around.
"I'm always careful. 'Cept when I'm not." He joked. I glanced up at him, obviously terrified by what he just said. Daryl laughed, a full out laugh, one of the few I'd ever heard from him, and smiled at me. "Careful. Cross ma heart." He said, actually crossing his chest.
"-And if I decided I had nothing left to live for, who the hell are you to force my hand like that?!" A raise voice asked from over by the RV. The entire group turned, watching as Andrea gave a Dale a tongue-lashing he probably didn't deserve. The old man physical recoiled from her words.
"I saved your life…" he said weakly.
"No Dale. I saved yours. You forced that on me." I suddenly realized the pair were arguing about the CDC and I shook my head, turning to look at Daryl. He eyed me warningly, licking his lips.
The campers left after Andrea and Dale's spat and I joined T-Dog and Dale at the RV to watch them go. I looked at the older man, giving him a weak smile, and shoved my hands into my pockets. Dale stared silently at Andrea's back before looking between myself and T-Dog.
"Well, we have some work to do around here." Dale said quietly, forcing a smile. He wanted to pretend like Andrea's words hadn't hurt him, but I knew they had. Quietly he walked around to the front of the camper to tinker away at something under the hood.
"Lets get that bandage changed." I said quietly, pulling myself away from where I leaned on the RV. T-Dog sighed, smiling at me and walking to the door of the RV.
"Yes Nurse Beau." He said trying to sound seductive. I smirked at him, patting his back and followed him into the trailer where he took a seat at the table.
"Don't even go there." I spoke quietly, still smirking at him. T-Dog smiled and held his arm out as I took a seat at the table with the med kit. Quickly I pulled the bandage I had placed yesterday off, but what awaited me underneath was something I had not expected.
I bit back a grimace, trying my best to hide my emotions, but T-Dogs arm wasn't looking so hot. Despite the ointment I applied yesterday, it seemed to be getting worse, even if the blood stopped. I grabbed a paper towel and walked over to the water cooler, wetting the paper towel I held in my hand. Slowly I brought the cool cloth to T-Dog's wound. He winced, but only for a moment as I wiped it clean.
T-Dog watched me curiously as I redressed his wound. I dared not look up at the man because I was afraid he'd be able to tell that my positive front was a lie. After I had applied the new bandage I smiled at him.
"All finished." I said as chipper as I could be. T-Dog stood quickly, stretching and looking back at the bed behind him. He yawned and I rolled my eyes.
"I think I may lay down. I'm feeling pretty tired." He said genuinely, plopping down heavily on the bed.
I joined Dale on the roof of the RV a while later. He sat quietly, looking out in all direction with his binoculars. As I climbed up the ladder I made my presence known, so I didn't scare him when I finally got up top.
"We may have a problem." I said quietly once he had acknowledged my presence.
"What's that?" Dale asked, not taking his binoculars from his face. I sigh, thinking back to the man who was still sleeping the RV below. I lowered my voice, walking closer to the old man.
"It's T-Dog." I said, putting a hand on the man's shoulder. Slowly he put down his binoculars, looking at me intensely. "His arm is looking pretty bad." I said, running a hand up and down my own forearm. Dale sighed, shaking his head.
"I know, I can tell just by looking at him that something's wrong." Dale said exasperated. "I just don't know what to do about it. We have no medicine unless somebody found some in a car." I shook my head, I had been up and down that highway and found nothing we could use. I opened my mouth to speak again, but the door to the RV opened and both of us peered down from our perch.
"Aint you supposed to be fixing that radiator?" It was T-Dog. I watched as he emerged slowly from the RV, seeming to have trouble closing the door behind him. Dale and I exchanged looks before he responded. "What if they come back with Sophia and Rick wants to move on right away?"
"I had it fixed it yesterday." Dale said, his eyes switching from T-Dog to myself. I raised an eyebrow at the old man, taking a seat on the roof next to him.
"What?" I asked in disbelief.
"What was all that rubbing a sanding for yesterday then?" T-Dog asked, gesturing wildly. "That just bullshit?"
"Yeah that's one word for it." I said suppressing a large grin. Dale smiled down at me, clearing his throat.
"Another word would be pantomime." Dale smiled at us, again looking in his binoculars. "Just for show." He pulled the binoculars away from his face looking deadly at both of us. "No one else needs to know that." I shrugged at him, still trying my hardest to conceal a smile. The man was dastardly, I had to give him that.
"Pantomime." I said, finally grinning at him. I shook my head as he spoke again.
"If the others know we're mobile, they'll want to mobilize, move on." Dale justified, shaking his head and looking around, purposefully avoiding our eye contact.
"So you don't think they're gonna find Sophia?" T-Dog asked, squinting up at them against the sun.
"I'm just guarding against the worst, that's all. Sooner or later if she's not found, people will start doing the math. I wanna hold off the needs of the many versus the needs of the few arguments as long as possible" I couldn't help but to agree with him because I could think of a few of the survivors who would be raring to go as soon as they found out. It would be unnecessary drama. There was a small pause after he spoke and T-Dog shifted on the pavement below.
"That is one tricky hose, huh?" T-Dog asked eventually, a sly grin appearing on his face. I bit my bottom lip, attempting to stifle the smile. Dale grinned down at him, chuckling.
"Very." T-dog turned, heading back inside of the RV, but no before stumbling into the door. I watched him from where I sat, throwing a concerned glance back at Dale. He frowned, shaking his head, bringing his binoculars back up to his face. I knew something had to be done about T-Dog, but I felt hopeless in knowing there was nothing I could do for the time being.
Dale and I had spent much of the day rummaging through was cars we didn't get to yesterday. I was searching solely for medicine but there was a lot of room on that RV, a lot of room to fill up with spare parts. He'd found a camper of a similar make and model and quickly began to dissect its engine.
I had gone off to loot a car that was a few feet away. The station wagon was full of what looked like luggage and camping gear, something we were ever grateful for when we came across it.
Heavy footsteps were heard behind us and I turned to see T-Dog walking toward us, he seemed nervous, agitated, and I cautiously followed him with my eyes, turning as he passed me.
"We're gonna have a ton of spare parts when we're done here." Dale said optimistically. T-Dog ignored him, taking a few steps past him, looking out into the tree line.
"Shouldn't they be back by now?" He asked.
"Its still light, lets not worry just yet." Dale reassured him, going back to dissembling the engine. Again T-Dog didn't acknowledge him, merely walked past, hands on his hips. I watched him silently, my interest piqued. Dale, too, had sensed something was off and now he stood watching the injured man.
"How are you feeling?" I asked, piping in from where I stood at the trunk of the car.
T-Dog turned to look at me this time and after a few seconds pause he nodded, before he began to wander off again. Dale and I shared an intense look before I stepped towards T-Dog.
"T-Dog," I called after him. Dale picked up his rifle as T-Dog turned around and slowly I approached the man, frowning at him. "I asked you how you were feeling just now, please don't blow that question off." I pleaded with the man. T-Dog caved, looking down at his arm.
"It really, really hurts. It's throbbing something awful." The man again looked at his arm and I followed hi gaze. I reached out to take his arm but he pulled it away. I reached out again him again, but this time more gently.
"Let me see…" I asked. T-Dog didn't pull his arm away, and I gently took his wrist. The bandage had been stained red again, something that immediately put me on edge. Slowly I lifted up the bottom of the bandage when I noticed that his veins had grown darker around the cut. I replaced the bandage, my fingers lightly grazing the wound, and T-Dog cried out in pain.
"Don't touch it!" He screamed. I stumbled back in fear, his sudden outburst startling me.
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." I whispered, releasing his arm. The man sank, leaning against Daryl's motorcycle for support. He brought a hand to his forehead, almost relieved that I no longer held his arm. I glanced at Dale and shook my head. "Listen, your veins are very discolored." I stated slowly, trying not to alarm him. T-Dog looked up at me, not understanding. "You've got a hell of an infection there. You could die from blood poisoning!" I felt my breath hitch in my throat at the thought of what I'd just seen.
"Oh man…" T-Dog said quietly, breaking into a fit of laughter. I watched him in disbelief as he laughed harder and harder. "Wouldn't that be the way?" he asked through giggles. I bit my lip, realizing how delirious he actually was. "World gone to hell, the dead risen up to eat the living, and Theodore Douglas gets done in by a cut on his arm." He began to laugh again and I looked at Dale, worried beyond all belief.
"We have to get you some antibiotics." I said placing two gentle hands on his shoulders. I've been ransacking these cars the whole time, but I haven't found anything." T-Dog stood fully watching her now that his laughter had subsided. I didn't know what to say to him, as the look on his face was suddenly serious. "We just…" he watched me expectantly but I didn't know what to say. "We just haven't been thorough enough." I blurted out. I glanced at Dale and he watched me, confused. He knew that was a lie. I personally searched through most of the cars, but I didn't know what else to say.
"So lets look some more." Dale offered up, gesturing towards the rows upon rows of cars behind us. T-Dog smiled at me warmly, clapping my shoulder with his hand. He seemed so unsteady, but he began to walk off all the same towards the cars, diving headlong and clumsily into the first one he saw.
I'd been looking through the cars for about an hour when Dale approached me to head back to the RV. T-Dog was already waiting for us, more than likely exhausted from the blood poisoning and the sun combined.
"Found some more batteries." Dale piped up as we approached the man. He looked up at us, a cigarette in hand. "And a trendy, pink bottle of water." I had intended to make a joke about the bottled water, but the look on T-Dogs face was serious and so sad, so I thought better of it."An excellent, new machete and I thought Glenn might like this guitar." Dale continued to rattle of items, but T-Dog had stopped listening and now leaned heavily on the RV behind him. Dale sat and watched T-Dog silently for a few seconds. "No drugs, you?"
"Yeah, ibuprofen," T-Dog said finally, after taking a long drag of his cigarette. "And these." He gestured to the lit fag he held in his hand. Dale said nothing, only looked at me, and the group went silent again until T-Dog spoke. "What are we doing?"
"Pulling supplies together?" Dale offered, gesturing towards the bags he returned with. I knew that wasn't what T-Dog meant and I crossed my arms in front of my chest. T-Dog looked up at me and shook his head.
"No, I mean, what are we doing? People off in the woods. They looking for that poor girl and we're here. Why?" Dale and I exchanged a glance before looking back at T-Dog. I didn't like where this was going one bit. "Because they think we're the weakest."
Though I knew they weren't true, T-Dogs words rang in my head like a self-conscious chorus. I couldn't help but feel, deep down in some dark park of my self conscious, that maybe that is why I didn't get chosen to go.
Daryl worries about you because you're weak, that's why you didn't go today and its why you didn't get to go at the farm house a few nights ago. I shook my head, blinking furiously.
That's ridiculous. Daryl just told you he wished you had come with him today. He doesn't think you're weak. I argued with myself.
"What the hell are you talking about?" Dale's voice had pulled me from my thoughts and I watched the pair. T-Dog sat smugly, smoking his cigarette like he'd just figured out the answer to the universe.
"I'm talking about two good old cowboy sheriffs and a redneck whose brother chopped off his own hand because I dropped a key." T-Dog looked between both of us, his eyes resting finally on Dale. "Who in that scenario do you think is going to get lynched?"
"What?" I said, scoffing at him. Blood poisoning or no blood poisoning, what he'd just said made my blood boil and I couldn't hold my tongue even though I knew I should've. "You realize that that "Redneck" saved your ass out on that pavement yesterday?"
"Because his pussy was there, man," T-Dog chuckled, gesturing to me. I was offended and hurt but I didn't get time to react. "Don't you get it? I woulda been walker food if you weren't with me." I was honestly stunned and I stepped back. Dale's jaw dropped, nearly to the ground and T-Dog sat back again, cigarette in his mouth. "You're old, I'm black and you are useless. Always getting yourself in trouble. That's why we're here!" T-Dog shouted the last part and Dale shushed him quickly. "Lets just go, lets just take the RV." He asked, dazed.
"You've gone off the deep end." Dale said, looking at the man like he sprouted another head. Dale looked up at me and I looked away, desperate for them to not see how upset his words left me. "And to make matters worse you've insulted the one person who has helped you more in the past 24 hours than anyone has all week." Dale glanced at me and T-Dog chuckled.
"If she had helped me why does my arm look like this?" He said, holding out his bandaged forearm. I swallowed, hard, unable to contain my emotions anymore and I stormed away, back to the truck that Daryl had cleaned out for us.
I had done all that I could. I told myself over and over again. I waited for it to sink in, but it never did and I began to cry, hot tears streaming down my face. T-Dog is going to die and it's all your fault. He came back for you, got cut on that car because of you and you couldn't even clean his wounds correctly. You are just like your daddy always said. Useless.
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