A/N: I don't own the wrestlers! I do own Pixie and Betsy. As always, it's meant in fun.
The Mizard Of Odd
Chapter 55: Miz Loses One
Miz had to admit, he was glad to see the Impact Zone. Jeff directed Punk into a parking space, then turned to the others. "I'm going inside. You guys wait here." He got out and waved to Orton, who had been driving the SUV.
"Now what?" Punk asked, as they watched Jeff walk into the building.
"I want a cookie!" Matt said.
"It's ten o clock in the morning," Miz told him. "No cookie."
"You're mean!" Matt said. "Punk, I want a cookie!"
"Maybe we should give him a cookie," Punk said.
Miz glared at Punk. "After that stunt you pulled? I was picking gum off the roof for an hour back here. No."
"I want a cookie!" Matt shrieked.
"It would keep him quiet," said Punk, wincing.
"For maybe five seconds," Miz said.
"Better than what we've got now."
"I want a cookie!"
Punk wordlessly dug out a cookie and handed it to Matt. Miz said, "Sometimes, I really hate you, Punk."
"Whatever," the straightedge superstar said. "At least he's quiet."
"I want some milk," Matt said around the cookie.
"That was a great idea. Where are we supposed to get milk?" Miz asked Punk.
"I want milk!" Matt said, spraying cookie crumbs all over Miz.
"Well, we don't have any, and you're lucky you've got a cookie!" Miz said.
"I want milk!"
"Better find him some milk," Punk said.
"And where am I going to do that?" Miz asked.
"I want…"
"I know!" Miz yelled.
Matt pouted. "You don't have to yell at me."
Miz sighed. Punk said, "Maybe there's some in the building somewhere? Muscle milk or something, at least."
Matt perked up. "Milk?"
Miz glared at Punk. "If I have to go in there looking for milk, then you're coming with me."
"Who's going to watch Jeff?"
"We could take him with us," Miz said.
"I'm not sure that's a good idea."
"Okay. Our other choice is to leave him with Orton and JJ."
Punk sighed. "Come on, Jeff. Let's go find you some milk."
"Yay! Milk!" Matt said, bouncing in the seat.
Miz rolled his eyes and opened his door. "You tell the others where we're going," he said to Punk. "We'll wait for you."
"Fine," Punk said, "but this time, you're holding Jeff's hand. I've had enough rumors started about me to last a lifetime."
Miz let Matt out, then grabbed his hand. "We have to wait for Punk, and then we'll go get your milk, Jeff."
"Yay! And then I can have more cookies?"
"We'll see," Miz said.
"We'll see means yes."
"It means maybe," Miz said.
Matt said, "Maybe means yes."
"No, it means maybe."
"It's not no, and if it's not no, then it's yes," Matt said with a nod. "Betsy told me that's how it works." He frowned. "Is Betsy coming with us to find milk?"
"No, I think Betsy wants to rest," Miz said, eyeing the fish in the blue water.
"Okay, Betsy," Matt said to the fish. "I'll be back later, when I have some milk. Do you want anything from the store?"
"We're not going to the store," Miz said.
"But the store is where you get milk," Matt said.
"We're getting it from somewhere else today."
"Are we stealing it?" Matt asked, his eyes huge.
"No," Miz said. "That's against Punk's religion."
"It's true," Punk said, coming up to the pair of them. He turned to Miz. "We should hurry this up before the others get restless. They were talking about going in there with us."
"That sounds like a disaster to me," Miz agreed.
"Why is it against your religion?" Matt asked Punk.
"Because stealing is wrong, Jeff." He ruffled Matt's hair. "Come on, let's go find you some milk."
"Yay! Milk!" Matt said. "Punk, will you hold my hand? Miz is mean to me."
"Miz is going to be nice to you," Punk said. "He promises."
Matt looked at Miz. "You promise?"
"Sure," Miz said. "Why not?" Punk started walking toward the door. "Do you know where you're going?"
"No, but how hard can it be?" Punk asked. "I'm sure you've seen an episode of TNA, right?"
"Not really," Miz said.
Punk turned to stare at Miz. "Why not?"
"Uh," Miz said, shrugging. "I don't know?"
"I've been here before!" Matt said, bouncing excitedly.
"Great," Punk said. "Do you know where catering is?"
"Caterpillars?" Matt asked, scrunching his brow.
"No, Jeff," Punk said. "Catering. You know, the cafeteria? Where everyone goes to eat?"
"Oh! The food part!" Matt grinned. "Yep! I know where that is!"
"Okay, then. Let's go there and see if they have any milk for your cookies, okay?"
"Yay!" Matt dragged Miz toward the door. "I know right where I'm going. I ate here once."
Miz shot Punk a look. "I hope you know what you're doing."
"He's been here before," Punk reasoned. "So he's got to be a better choice to find catering than we are, right?"
"Sure, we'll go with that," Miz muttered. "Even if it's misguided and wrong."
Punk smirked. "I don't see you coming up with any better ideas."
"My idea was to not give him the cookie in the first place," Miz said.
"Too late for that now," Punk pointed out. "The cookie has been given, and now it's up to us to find some milk to go with it."
Matt led them through the door into a bustling hive of activity. "Which way, Jeff?" Miz asked.
Matt frowned, then pointed. "That way!" He pulled his hand from Miz's grasp and took off running in the direction he'd pointed.
Miz groaned. "Jeff!" Punk yelled. He turned to Miz. "You shouldn't have let go!"
Miz glared at Punk. "Dude, he outweighs me. It's like Red Rover. He pulled, and I wasn't ready so he got loose. I didn't do it on purpose!"
Punk sighed. "This is a nightmare."
"You're telling me," Miz said. "But at least no one saw us holding hands."