A/N: I don't own the wrestlers! I do own Pixie and Betsy. As always, it's meant in fun.

A/N: Sorry about the long delay. I wanted to say thanks for all the kind comments.

The Mizard Of Odd

Chapter 59: Miz Goes To SeaWorld, Part One

"Jeff!" Miz said to the man tugging at his hand and nearly pulling him over. "We have to wait for Nero to buy the tickets first!"

"But he's taking foreeeever!" Matt whined, straining against the hold Miz had on his hand. "And the gate's right there! Betsy wants to go in now!"

"Maybe you shouldn't say that so loudly," Miz muttered.

"I'm Betsy!" Mark said, twirling around. "See my pretty fin dress? Whee!"

Matt stopped tugging at Miz's hand to stare at Mark. "Betsy is a BOY. He doesn't have a fin dress!"

Mark stuck his tongue out at Matt. "I can be a girl if I want to."

"You're not Betsy," Matt said stubbornly.

"Yes huh I am," Mark said.

"Oh, for dad's sake," Punk muttered. "Can't you two behave for five minutes?"

Mark and Matt glared at each other. Miz sighed. "Where the hell is Jeff?"

"I'm Jeff!" Matt said, pouting.

"I know," Miz said. "I meant Nero. Where is he?"

Just then, Jeff walked up. "I got the tickets."

"Finally!" Matt said. "It took a long long time!"

"And I'm Betsy and I can't wait to go in to Seaworld!" Mark said.

"You are not Betsy!" Matt said again.

"No, of course not," Christian said. "I've got Betsy right here." He held up a can.

"Uh, Rey?" JJ said. "That's a can of Pepsi."

"What?" Christian said, squinting at the can. "Ew, gross!" He dropped the can, spilling the Pepsi.

"My holy Pepsi!" Punk shrieked. "How dare you waste it like that, you heathen!"

"I didn't spill it," Christian said. "I threw it."

"He baptized the ground," Randy said, staring at the spreading Pepsi puddle.

Punk frowned and stared down at the spot. "This is now a holy spot. Do you know what that means? We're going to have to make a religious pilgrimage here every year on this date. What day is it?"

"Tuesday?" Randy volunteered.

"No, it's not Tuesday," Miz said, "or we will have missed the show. It's definitely Friday."

"So now I will have to visit here on Fridays and I'll have to go to that one IHOP where I spilled my Pepsi every third Wednesday." Punk nodded. "This could work."

Miz rolled his eyes. "So who's got Betsy?"

"He's right here," Punk said, holding up the fish. "Are we going in or what?"

"Are you sure you don't want to stay out here and pray to the Pepsi puddle?" Christian asked.

"Don't be absurd," Punk said. "I don't pray to the Pepsi. I pray for the heathens to accept me as their savior and allow me to baptize them in the holy Pepsi."

"It burns my eyes," Christian muttered.

"Come on, Miz!" Matt whined, dragging Miz toward the gate. "I want to see Shamu! And Betsy wants to see his cousin!"

"I'm Betsy," Mark said.

"So you're a fish?" Randy said skeptically. "Then why aren't you drowning in the air?"

"Argh! Augh!" Mark screamed, causing the others to jump. "Ack! Noooo!" He paused. "Being Betsy is hard. I'm not Betsy anymore. Now I'm a cannonball. Whee!" He ran for the gate. "I'm going to kill you all! Whee!"

Miz looked at Punk. "Uh…"

Punk sighed. "Right. I'll get him." He chased after Mark, yelling, "Bad cannonball! What have I told you about killing people?"

"Yeah," Jeff said, watching the pair of them. "That's not going to get us kicked out. Aside from the fact that they didn't take their tickets, they're screaming things like that at a family park, and there's only so many times you can use the mentally unstable excuse before people start to wonder about you."

"We are mentally unstable," Christian muttered. "Some of us more than others. Right, JJ?" He nudged Matt.

"Uh, I'm over here, Rey."

"You are?" Christian asked, blinking. "Then who's this?"

"It's…" JJ said.

"Oh, please don't say it," Miz said. "Please, JJ, I am begging you."

JJ frowned. "Good point, Undertaker. It's Spongebob's brother."

"Oh. Sorry, Matt," Christian said, patting the elder Hardy.

"I'm Jeff!" Matt said.

Randy grinned. "Not for long… Drew."

Matt growled. "I will kill you all."

Jeff stared at his brother. "Why do people keep saying that today?"

"You just had to say it, didn't you?" Miz said to Randy.

"Yes," Randy said. "Can I hang out with Matthew in SeaWorld? I want to see the shark tank."

"Somehow, I think that would be a bad idea," Miz said.

"And why are you holding my hand?" Matt said, glaring at Miz.

"I like you?" Miz said, shrugging.

Matt pulled his hand away as if he'd been burned. "You stay away from me or I will kill you."

"Yeah, nothing new there," Miz said. He turned to see Punk dragging Mark back by the ear. "Oh, good. The rest of our party's here. Shall we go in now?"

"But why can't Matthew and I hang out at the shark tank?" Randy whined. "I want to watch them bite stuff. Maybe I can get a few pointers on how to really hurt someone."

"And that's why you're not hanging out at the shark tank," Miz said. "Do I have to hold your hand, too?"

"No," Randy said. "Only Jeff gets to hold my hand." Jeff blinked and eyed Randy. "Not you," Randy growled.

"Perverts," Matt said, stalking toward the gates of SeaWorld.

"Maybe someone should turn him back into Jeff?" Punk said.

"Please," Miz muttered. "Or he's going to be unbearable all day long. I'd rather have to hold his hand as Jeff than deal with Matthew in SeaWorld."

"But the sharks!" Randy said. "They totally want to see Matthew and me! They want us to learn from them!"

"I'm a shark!" Mark said happily.

"No you're not," Punk said. "And I'm Jesus, so I should know."

"No, I'm not," Mark said sadly. "But I'm a guppy, and someday, I'll grow up into a shark!"

Punk sighed. "That'll have to do, I guess," he said.