IF YOU'VE MADE IT THIS FAR THEN I LOVE YOU AND YOU ARE MY BEST FRIEND. I DON'T CARE HOW THAT WEIRD THAT IS.
Does anyone remember the chakra reference in Chapter 42? No? *sigh* Well, alrighty then.
The Isadora Diaries:
Chakras:
Thursday, April 12th
First thing in the morning, I told Bea about Mark's plan.
"Play a dating game at the dance?" she asked. "But most of the couple's at the dance aren't technically dating. Katelyn and her date aren't, Dun can and I aren't, and neither are Klaus and Haley."
I waved her off. "That's not important. The important thing is that we get you to host the dating game at the dance, and I'll influence Haley to enter with Klaus. Klaus is nice, so he'll probably do it. Most likely."
"How will me hosting a dating game help?" she asked uncertainly. "And how will playing a dating game help us get Haley's passcode?"
"It's going to help because you're going to pick the questions to ask the couples, and one of them can be what their girlfriend's passcode is. Klaus will say what he thinks it is while Haley writes what it actually is on a white board. Isn't that brilliant?" I explained with excitement.
Bea nodded. "Yeah, it is! But how are we going to be able to set up the game? Would we get in trouble?"
"Mark said we should talk to the principal about it," I answered. "I think she'll agree. She's always trying to set people up anyway. She'll like watching something like the dating game."
Yes, our school principal is literally always trying to set people up. It's only ever the popular kids, so Bea and I don't really have anything to worry about. We can, however, listen to how absolutely ridiculous she is and make fun of her. I hope she hasn't heard anything we've said about her, because Bea and I need her to let us put on that dating game.
"Let's hurry and ask right now before class starts!" Bea suggested, pulling me in the direction of the principal's office.
That was quick.
The principal is usually cranky in the morning, so that's not really the time you want to talk to her. Even if she is unusually perky.
Maybe she's so perky in the afternoon because she gets all her crankiness out of her during the morning. I sure wish my English teacher was like that. She's just an all-around crazy lady that you don't want to share the same air with.
Back to the principal, who has a name that I guess I should mention now. Her name is Miss Barb. She never got married, so that might be why she's so into setting people up.
I don't know why.
None of the couples she tries to set up ever work.
She once tried to convince Cole Barnes and Angelina Danes go out on a date once, but considering that Angelina is a straight-A student with no criminal record, and Cole is a known smoker that occasionally gets sent to alternative school for fights and stealing from teachers, everyone else could see that they were no match.
Therefore, the two of them, and everyone who was friends with them, dismissed Miss Barb's suggestion.
I dismissed the suggestion, too, and I'm not friends with Angelina or Cole. I just think it's weird and wrong for school staff to get involved with the dating lives of students.
Anywho…
I reminded Bea about how Miss Barb was in the morning and that we'd have a better chance in the afternoon, sometime during lunch.
Bea didn't exactly agree with me, but that's because she is majorly impatient.
She continued to drag me towards Miss Barb's office despite my argument. I even reminded her about the time we asked her homework help last year in the morning before class, and she screamed at us saying that she wasn't a genius and that we were delinquent children who were never going to get anywhere in life.
I almost cried.
Can you believe she's still not fired after saying something like that?
Well, Miss Barb does a good job of scaring people morning or afternoon. I guess it doesn't matter what rank they are, the school board has been too afraid to fire Miss Barb.
I've heard rumors that the school board has been afraid of firing her since 1954.
But I know that's a lie, because she was born in 1955. She told my parents that once when they visited the school for a parent conference. (It was after she yelled at me and Bea. Would you believe that she actually called them? Bea and I were actually the ones being punished!)
And so that goes to show just how much no one at school likes her because people make mean jokes about her. Like how old she is.
She's really not that old, she just has a lot of stress wrinkles.
Not that I'm trying to defend her. I can't stand that woman.
Anywho…
Do you completely understand why I really didn't want to go see Miss Barb this morning? I had a bad experience with her! Bea had one, too! Bea ignored that little fact of importance, though. She told me that she was working on this whole 'forgive and forget' thing that her father had explained to her, and it was really cleansing her chakras a bunch.
What the heck is a chakra?
Online dictionary time!
Chakra – one of the seven major energy centers in the body.
How wonderful.
I wonder where my chakras are…
Do you like, feel them generating energy in a certain spot of your body or something?
I don't get it. I'll ask Mr. Snicket for an explanation later.
Anywho…
Bea dragged me by the wrists to the outside of Miss Barb's office. It was a wooden door with an uncovered window, so we could see Miss Barb working at her desk. She's a skinny lady with shoulder-length and dry looking dyed-blonde hair, and a lot of stress wrinkles.
Bea knocked on the door lightly and called, "Miss Barb?"
Miss Barb didn't even look up from her work when she yelled, "Who dares to disturb me?!"
Bea, a very daring girl indeed, opened the door wide enough for the two of us to step through.
Being in Miss Barb's office made me a little nervous. It smelled of guilty tension…and a little bit of cinnamon.
"It's us, Miss Barb," Bea answered, "Bea and Isadora."
Miss Barb looked up and gave us a dramatic eye roll which she topped off with a groan. "I suppose you two want something? What is it?"
"I told you we should've come during lunch," I whispered in Bea's ear.
"What was that?!" Miss Barb screamed at me.
I jumped back a little, darting my eyes to Bea, hoping she'd help me.
By help me, I mean get me out of there.
"Oh, she was just saying that your hair looks especially pretty today," Bea said sweetly.
Miss Barb straightened up and began combing her hair with her fingers. "Oh? Well, I did get a root touch up yesterday. Er-don't tell anyone I said that."
I shook my head. "We won't tell anyone, Miss Barb."
"So what is it you kids want?" Miss Barb asked, more calm now that she had been complimented.
"Well," Bea began, "Isadora and I came up with this game that students could play during the dance. We were hoping that you would agree to let us set it up and go through with it."
Miss Barb put her elbow on the desk and rested her chin in her hand. She narrowed her eyes at us intently. "What kind of game?"
"It's called The Dating Game, Miss," I said.
She raised her eyebrows for a moment. "Continue."
"For the game," I continued, feeling a little shaky now that the crazy lady was focused on me, "there will be a number of girls on one side of a podium, and their dates will be on the other side. The host will ask the girls a question, their dates will write down what they think the girls will say on a white board. The girls will answer the question and if their dates were right, they get a point."
"And vice versa?" Miss Barb.
"Yes, Miss," Bea and I said at the same time.
Miss Barb narrowed her eyes at us even more. After what seemed like an eternity, she sat up in her chair and said. "I'll think about it. Come see me during lunch and I will give you my answer."
Bea and I agreed, and with a polite goodbye (and a couple of bows for good measure) Bea and I left Miss Barb's tension/cinnamon-filled office.
"See?" Bea asked as we walked to our first class of the day. "That wasn't so bad was it?"
"I don't know, I'm kind of dead right now."
Bea laughed and pushed me lightly. "Oh, Isadora!"
"I still think we should've gone during lunch!" I said.
Bea rolled her eyes. "Whatever. We got her to at least think about it, didn't we? That's better than nothing."
I shrugged. "Yeah, you're right."
"And like you said before," Bea said, "Miss Barb is always in her super-perky mood by lunch, which is when she wants us to go see her. Since she'll be in a good mood, she'll definitely agree."
She was probably right.
Okay, what diary entry this week would be complete without a portion dedicated to Klaus and his persistence?
This one because he wasn't at school.
*cue dance music and awesome party*
Before you get all mad about me celebrating his absence, please recall the fact that I'm supposed to be mean to him while Haley has those videos on my phone, and it's been really hard to be serious around him because I feel like I'm just making stupid jokes!
It's a lot easier to keep Haley from being suspicious when he's not around.
I didn't find out why he stayed home from school until I got home. Duncan went to his house for a while, and came back with the reason.
Don't get all worried. He just wasn't feeling good this morning, but he's all good now.
Let's get back to The Dating Game. Shall we?
Anywho…
At the start of lunch, Bea and I went straight to Miss Barb's office. Bea knocked on the door, but no one answered. We looked in the window, but Miss Barb wasn't there.
"Great," I muttered. "We're here about something important, and she isn't here."
"I'm right here, darlings!" called a much too cheerful voice from behind us. We both looked over our shoulders to see Miss Barb happily making her way towards us jiggling her keys I one hand, and carrying a Chinese take-out box in the other. Bea and I moved out of the way so that Miss Barb could unlock her door and let us in.
"Take a seat, children!" Miss Barb smiled, gesturing towards the two leather seats in front of her desk.
Her personality was so different from earlier that day that it was almost freaky.
Actually, it was freaky.
Miss Barb is just a freaky lady in general.
"So," she said as we all sat all down, "I thought about your little dating game." She paused and just stared at us, smiling.
Bea and I exchanged glances.
"And?" Bea urged, spinning her two index fingers around each other.
"I've decided to let you two girls do it!" Miss Barb squealed. "Oh, isn't this exciting?! A dating game for the couples at the dance! I can learn so much about them-er, I mean the students can. And tension it will create! It'll be like watching a soap opera! Go start planning it! You little animals, you! Go on! I'll be making an announcement about it at the end of the day!"
And with that, she shooed us out of her office so we could start planning the game. "Oh, and come see me tomorrow morning about it!"
Oh.
Well, crap.
Another morning with a cranky lady.
That's exactly how I like beginning my Friday morning.
Not.
Bea and I had just left the office when I realized something.
If Miss Barb was going to announce the dating game, she was probably going to announce who came to her with the idea as well. She's just that kind of person.
If Haley found out that I was behind it, and she heard that passcode I would be done for.
I turned myself right back around and stepped back into Miss Barb's office. "Miss Barb?" I called.
She looked up from the work on her desk and smiled at me sweetly. "Yes, dear? Is there something else?"
I nodded. "Could you not tell anyone that Bea and I came are the ones that came to you about it?"
Miss Barb frowned. "Why? Don't you want your peers to know what geniuses you and your friends are?"
Geniuses?
Ha.
That's funny.
I shook my head. "Not really."
She shrugged. "Oh, well. If that's what you really want."
I nodded. "Thank you, Miss."
Miss Barb didn't lie about making the announcement. She made it a few minutes before the last class of the day ended.
"Attention students! For the spring formal tomorrow, you and your date may participate in a game called The Dating Game. Come see me after school for details and if you would like to enter. Have a wonderful afternoon!"
"A dating game?" Haley, who is unfortunately in my last class, asked her friends. "That sounds interesting…"
"I've heard of something like that!" said one of Haley's friends. "They had one at my cousin's school. It's where they ask the couple questions to see how much they know about each other. The couple that knows the most wins."
"Are you and Klaus going to enter?" asked one of Haley's giggly friends. (I never bothered to learn her name.)
I clenched my fist around the pencil I was using to draw. I wanted Haley to enter the game, and I knew that Klaus would be playing as well if she entered. It's just that I couldn't stand to hear Haley and her friends referring to them as a couple.
Haley shrugged. "Well, we've already learned so much about each other. It just wouldn't be fair to the other couples…"
"So you're not entering?" another friend asked.
Haley rolled her eyes. "Of course I'm entering me and Klaus! That way, when we win, everyone will know that we're an awesome couple. Including Klaus, and he'll finally stop talking about—" she stopped herself.
I almost straightened my back at the sudden realization that she was about to say my name. I'm not like self-centered or just assume that Klaus always talks about me it's just that Haley has told me twice now that Klaus keeps talking about me.
I kept myself from making any sudden movements that would prove I'd been listening to their entire conversation. I could feel Haley's eyes burning into me and I felt like she knew that I had been listening. I started to grow really warm, and my muscles started to hurt. I soon realized it was because I had become stiff without meaning to.
I didn't want to seem unnaturally frozen, so I pretended to draw imaginary lines on my picture.
"What will he stop talking about, Haley?" asked one of the friends.
"Honestly, Haley! Finish your sentences!" said another friend.
Finally, Haley pulled her gaze away from me and back to her circle of friends. "He'll finally stop talking about worried he is that we won't make a good couple. I don't know why he's so worried."
"For real!"
"You two are so perfect!"
"You'd be the cutest couple in the school!"
You'd also be dead because I would probably kill you if that ever happened, I thought to myself.
I know, I'm so violent! *insert sobbing emoji because I like that word*
I'm sorry but I just cannot handle the thought of Klaus and Haley being official. If being with her was what Klaus really wanted because he really liked her, then fine. I would get over it and move on with my life. I would just move on away from them because I wouldn't be able to take Haley talking about Klaus being hers all the time.
I wish I could just delete those videos from Haley's phone right now, that way I wouldn't have to fight Klaus about talking to me, and we can just be friends again. I wish that I never agreed to wear that stupid costume and do that stupid show. I wish that I never ruined Bessie's hay and had to make money to pay my mother back.
Most of all…
I really wish I didn't have that extra piece of cake because now my stomach hurts really badly.
I'm just kidding, I actually Klaus was here with me right now, but I'm trying to lighten my mood a little bit by trying to be funny. It's sort of working…sort of.
Ow, okay, I wasn't kidding about my stomach hurting.
No more cake for me.
Oh my gosh I'm dying!
Tell my cat I love him!
I'm kidding. I don't have a cat.
Adopting a cat sounds really good about now. I'm serious; I would really like a cat.
He would be black and his name would be Shadow.
If the cat is a girl then her name would be Professor McGonagall.
That would be the best thing in the world. I'm going to ask my mom for a black cat for my birthday…
Fat chance of her saying yes.
Oh…oh no.
This is bad.
This is really bad.
This is really really bad.
Klaus just remembered he has a phone. He just texted me saying,
Hey, sorry I couldn't talk to you today. I was sick. But I'm okay now and we can talk now.
As much as I would like to text him back and make fun of him forgetting that he has a phone again, I know I can't.
If I could spit on his message, I would. Sadly that's not how texting works.
He just sent me another text. It says,
I'm going to get you to talk to me, Iz, even if it takes all night. ALL NIGHT.
I'm kind of glad that he still cares about me and doesn't want to give up trying to talk to me.
Okay, I'm really glad.
Hopefully, he won't stop before I can apologize and explain everything to him tomorrow night.
3,076
This chapter dragged a little, too. :p
"I would sail across the east sea
Just to see you on the far side
Where the wind is cold and angry
There you'll be to take me inside
We'll find ways to fill the empty
Far from all the hysteria
I don't care if we suddenly
Find ourselves in Siberia
Siberia..."
~ Siberia by Lights
You're kind of awesome for coming this far. I love you!
Do you maybe want to review and tell me what you thought? :)
;)