It's been a long ass time since this was updated. Don't despair. Now it's the holiday, there can be boundless Ereri goodness!
Eren could feel his heart pounding in anticipation. In just a few minutes, he would be going out to get ice cream with Japan's most famous pop star! It was a young singer's dream come true!
He was in his changing room for the studio where they were filming the music video for 'Cravat and Cape,' in the middle of twiddling off the delicate lace cravat around his neck, and gradually peeling off layer upon layer of skintight leather spandex. He tore off the clothes and flung them to the far corners of the room. There was no time to put them back properly! He couldn't waste a moment when he could be out with Heichou!
His mind kept wandering around in circles as he zipped off his boots. 'If Heichou agreed to hang out with me, he must not hate me!' and then, of course, it led on to think, 'if he doesn't hate me, he must like me!' Somehow he ended up convincing himself that Heichou was secretly in love with him - although he hardly dared to hope so high.
After stripping, he spent a lot of time dithering about, trying to decide what to wear on his big date. There were bountiful costumes provided in the cupboard. He rifled through them, while wearing nothing more than underpants. 'If I go too casually, he'll think I'm not serious about him!' He tossed aside a pair of jeans vengefully and pulled out the next article of clothing. It was a floor length, red ballgown with glittering ruby gems. It was the kind of dress a young princess would dream about wearing to attract a handsome prince.
Conspiratorial thoughts ran through Eren's head as he pressed the ballgown against his body, judging whether it would fit.
Did Heichou like this kind of thing? The dress looked just about the right size. He could slip right into it and walk out of the studio confidently, linking arms with Heichou. He would never hear the end of Jean's teasing crap afterwards, but it would be totally worth it to impress Heichou. Hmnn. A difficult conundrum.
Unfortunately, Eren didn't have time to don the dress. Abruptly, he heard the door of the changing room slam open and a forceful figure traipsing inside. Whoever was storming in so rudely didn't even bother to knock. Frightened that the perpetrator would see him in his underwear, he bashfully clutched the crimson dress to his body, covering himself. He panicked, blood flushing right up to his cheeks, tingeing them a bright pink. "D-don't come in!" he stammered, backing towards the wall, screwing his eyes tight shut in embarrassment. "I'm changing."
"Tch. You want me to go away?" he heard, from the intruder.
For the briefest second, he relaxed that it was only Heichou that was seeing him in his underwear. If it had been Talent Manager Erwin he would have never recovered from the shock. The ballgown dropped to the ground as he was relieved.
But then he reconsidered it for a while, still under the icy, heartless stare of mankind's greatest singer.
Heichou was glaring at him.
And he was wearing nothing.
"KU-SO!" Eren cursed as the red of his face became deeper than that of the dress crumpled on the floor. He blushed deeper than he'd ever blushed before. Because you need lots of blushing in yaoi Fanfiction. Frantically, he looked for something to put on, fully aware he was under close scrutiny from Heichou's judgmental eyes. In his underwear, he turfed the closet upside down looking for anything, anything at all.
"Mmmn mnn," he heard Heichou thinking to himself. Eren couldn't interpret what that meant. Was Heichou impatient, or just pleased to see him in his underpants? The star had changed into a classy, dark overcoat that stretched down to brush the floor. It billowed behind him as he walked. It was practically the most badass and sexy thing ever. And no, author of this fic doesn't have a fetish for Sherlock coats or anything. Omfg why did he have to be so stylish and fabulous all the time? It was doing terrible things to Eren's mind. The shorter man took a few paces forward as Eren looked through the closet, his eye distracted by the crumpled dress on the floor. With slender fingers, he lifted it off the floor for closer inspection. "Hm. Do you usually wear this sort of apparel, Jaeger?"
Eren had just managed to find an appropriate, wholesome pair of cargo pants, but he dropped them on the floor when he was struck off guard by this question.
Was he supposed to answer honestly? He might chase Heichou away if he did. "We had to wear the Talent School uniforms most of the time for the last few years. I haven't had much opportunity to form my own fashion sense," Eren admitted, scratching the back of his neck, nude save for his underwear.
"Shame," Heichou said, mostly to himself, as Eren hurriedly moved to throw on some actual clothes. "I choose all my own outfits for my shows. Style is an essential skill in the industry."
Eren considered that Heichou was about the most stylish person he'd ever met. Forget that. The most stylish person on the planet.
Once Eren had fumbled on a pair of pants and messily buttoned up a shirt, Heichou stopped leaning against the wall, ready to head out. "So we're going out to get ice cream," he stated in exasperation. "Is this truly what you want to do?"
Eren could think of a myriad of other things he'd rather do with Heichou than getting ice cream, but an awful lot of them were not T-rated. "But Heichouuu, ice cream is delicious! It can cool you down on a hot summer day!"
"It's the middle of winter."
He began walking out of the room, and Eren followed. They strode side by side through a twisting corridor, a flight of stairs, and into the main recording room. There were technicians and designers working fervently on every aspect of the set. Petra was up on a high ladder fiddling with a lightbulb in one of the lofty ceiling lamps above the catwalk.
Hanji and Erwin were arguing violently about something. She hadn't even decided what song ReCON!KISS was supposed to sing in round Maria of SoundTitan!. Apparently Heichou was working on that, as well as finishing up a duet for him to sing with Eren.
Eren could only see Heichou by his side as they ambled through the studio and out into the chill outside air of Tokyo. "You know, I don't think we should be taking such a long break. We need as much of an advantage against the Vocaloids as possible," Eren said offhandedly.
This actually somewhat interested Heichou. "I thought a weak brat like you would be exhausted after such a long day of filming."
Eren couldn't believe Heichou thought he would give up so easily! He clenched a fist tightly, sweat pouring down his brow. "When it comes to fighting the Vocaloids, I don't need to rest. I'm never going to give up until every single one of them is dead! When I've sliced off Gakpo's lame ponytail and strangled Rin with her evil white bow, and made Miku choke to death on her own hair. I will hunt them down for as long as I live - I can sleep when I'm dead."
Heichou blinked once. For him, it was an intense expression of surprise. "Hm, you're certainly passionate. Perhaps you've got more fight in you than I thought - though your plans for vengeance are still childish. You act as if the Vocaloids killed your parents or performed some other grave sin."
"The Vocaloids caused Arashi to split up!" Eren exclaimed. "They were like family to me, and the Vocaloids tore them apart like animals waiting for slaughter!"
Heichou just blinked once or twice more - undergoing some silent contemplation. Undoubtedly, Eren believed, it was his way of mourning Arashi. He must have been shedding silent tears.
Yup, Levi Rivaille crying. I really don't know where Eren got stupid ass ideas like that in the twisted little mind of his. Quite frankly, Levi Rivaille never cried. Although there are no witness reports to the event, but we can safely assume that even when pulled out of his mother's womb in the hospital for the first time, Rivaille never shed so much as a drop of a tear. If he ever did, it would probably cause the Third Impact and the explosion of the world.
"Soooo Heiiichouuuu are we gonna get ice~cream?" Eren asked, completely recovered from his bout of fierce passion.
Heichou just sighed in response. "Do you even know of any ice cream stores?"
"Only all of them!" Eren exclaimed. "How can you live your life without knowing where the nearest emergency ice cream parlor is? If we allow ourselves to go without ice cream, we let the Vocaloids win!"
So the two of them, miraculously, began picking through the streets of Tokyo.
Now, Tokyo was quite an amazing place. They swam past floods of neon lights, the blaring music and clink of coins in Pachinko parlors. They bumped into cosplayers out in the streets and a plethora of delicious foods were out on display. Eren marveled and drooled at the window of a candy store. Heichou had to wait with his hands in his pockets, like an impatient boyfriend whose insistent girlfriend wants to try on one more pair of shoes.
Many otakus who may glance over this story will most likely, have an overwhelming desire to visit Japan. This is a serious mental issue that can cause a lot of suffering while one is stuck on one's butt reading Fanfiction in their crummy home country. Therefore, in order to avoid suffering from the yearning otaku, advanced descriptions of the vices of Tokyo shall be avoided. Instead, we shall focus upon the bonding between Eren and Levi that transpired in that period of time.
After they'd been walking for a while through the centre of the city, Heichou had been swarmed no less than four times by crowds of fangirls. They'd insisted over and over again that he give them a signature, or a song, or his hand in marriage. If it hadn't been for many swift 3D escape maneuvers out of the crowd, they might have been there for hours. Eren hoped the ladies wouldn't get jealous of him being Heichou's #1 girlfriend. He didn't want to be crushed by a stampeding herd of angry fangirls.
On their trip through a calmer side street, Eren caught Heichou looking up toward the sky thoughtfully, towards the glowing skyscrapers of the city. "I have an apartment in Tokyo somewhere," the older man stated. "A discreet place. No one knows about it besides me. A safe house in which to hide from the pestering world."
Eren wasn't sure why he was bringing it up. A secret apartment? Completely off the grid? Where you could stay, alone, for hours with no one finding you? Not even Talent Manager Erwin? Where Eren and Heichou could spent days without being disturbed.
Wait...
"ARE YOU SAYING WE SHOULD GO THERE TO HAVE SEX?" Eren yelled. Why else would he bring up something like that?
Heichou was not even amused. "Tch."
What was that fucking supposed to mean?! Heichou was such an enigma to Eren - although the thought that he was so mysterious just made him more and more attractive.
Unfortunately, though Eren was filled with elation on his little road trip with Heichou, it was also filled with sadness and regret. It was impossible to walk down any high street without seeing the sign of at least one Vocaloid. Soon enough the Colossal Miku was rearing her ugly head in the form of cute dolls in windows, all the way up to ten storey billboards. It set a wrathful fire burning in Eren's heart.
At last, they reached the ice cream joint Eren had been leading them to. Hanji had been the one to give him some brief directions before filming began. She and Eren had had a brief conference concerning possible romantic locations, and this was high on the list.
Eren pushed open the door, and was relieved to find there were no pictures of Armoured Kaito or any of the other terrible Vocaloid titans. There were some kawakii happy pictures of other characters painted all over the white walls, all happy and bubbly. Many machines that dispensed every flavour of ice cream into tubs were at the ready. It was a create-your-own ice cream style place, where you could pile on the flavours, and heap on enough toppings to make yourself vomit. There were mostly children running around the place. There was a happy cartoon penguin on a poster explaining that you paid for the pot, and you could fill it with as much ice cream as you wanted.
Heichou took one pessimistic look around the place before scowling cynically. "Eren Jaeger, have you ever, in your life, chosen a location for a romantic meeting before?"
"I've been too busy focusing on conquering the Vocaloids my whole life," Eren admitted embarrassed, "I've never done anything like this before. This is my first date."
"Don't push your luck, brat. I'm only here because I would prefer not to endure Hanji's delirious antics during my lunch break. Now eat your ice cream, and we can get out of here."
Eren dashed up to the counter, ready to buy his pot to fill with ice cream. There were three sizes - One Scoop Class, Two Scoop Class and Three Scoop Class. They could only be conquered through the power of little plastic spoons. Eren wanted a three Scoop Class, and he was about to speak to the attendant, when he realised he had a problem.
"Fuckdamn shitcrap!" Eren yelled, mortifying some children. "I gave all my extra money to Armin for him to buy drugs! I haven't got any cash to dish out for ice cream."
Heichou glared at him. "You can't even buy your own junk food. Pathetic."
"Do you, er, have any money I could borrow?" Eren asked the star nervously. Heichou didn't even need to rifle through his pockets for an answer.
"I assumed you had money, and I didn't expect to buy anything for myself. I have nothing to lend you."
Eren glanced over thoughtfully at the attendant behind the counter selling the pots. He was a moderately attractive young man in his twenties. Probably single. Probably (given the track record for everyone in this fic) gay. The young singer hatched a master plan to acquire ice cream.
This was a plan doomed to fail. You have only to look at Eren's official stats on the Attack on Titan wiki - a 3 out of 10 score for strategy. But he tried. "Heichou, everyone thinks you're amazingly hot - go and seduce the assistant so he'll give us free ice cream!"
Heichou didn't even grace Eren with a 'tch' this time. He stared at the boy as if he were an escaped asylum lunatic. "Honestly what the fuck?" he said, uncaringly in one tone.
"Anyone would fall for you Heichou!" He had to turn on his host club charm!
Levi really, really, really couldn't believe what he was about to do, but with a migraine pounding in his head and a lifeless sigh, he sauntered up to the ice cream counter. Why was he doing this just so the brat could get some sweets? It was utterly degrading. But he was doing it anyway. Something must have been wrong in his mind. He'd have a talk with his therapist in great detail about this later. At last, he reached the counter, leaned on it heavily with one elbow, and gave the assistant a million dollar half-smile. It was accompanied by a stormy glare as he ran a hand through his hair. Heichou wasn't exactly a showboater, but he could be one handsome devil if he needed to be.
"Hello handsome," Rivaille breathed, scarcely above a whisper. "Think you could give me some of that ice cream? I seem to have misplaced my wallet today..."
The assistant was so utterly stunned. He couldn't decide if this was OOC or not, but he honestly didn't care. He couldn't speak a word. Protesting, or denying Heichou the ice cream was utterly inconceivable. When you were being given that look, you were as good as paralysed. A slave to the commands of its owner.
So the assistant dumbly reached for the closest ice cream tub to hand, and with shaking fingers handed it over to Heichou.
As soon as Levi had the pot in hand, he dropped his act, and went straight back into the scowling he always did. He walked away coldly without turning back, and tossed the pot to Eren.
Eren didn't waste a second. He dashed over to the dispensers lined against the wall and started flooding the poor pot with the frozen dessert. Chocolate, nutella, cheesecake, mango, vanilla, strawberry all piled on top of each other. The brunette shoved children out of the way in the topping station, building a tower of brownie bites, fudge cubes, gummy bears and peanut butter cups.
When he'd at last perfected his masterpiece, he slid into a padded booth seat in the corner, and started to devour the thing at once – with such ravenousness that Sasha would be proud.
Heichou watched, as usual, with disgust as Eren chomped through the ice cream. The boy wasn't even using a spoon. It made his eye twitch to watch every time he took a bite.
Eren paused in the middle of his feast, realising that the older man was just sitting there. He extended the massive pot of ice cream at arm's length in his direction. "HEICHOU DON'T YOU WANT ANY? You're the one who got it for free!"
"I don't like sweets," Levi replied bitterly. Eren had been licking that monstrosity over and over again. "And it's highly unsanitary."
"But it's really gooooood~!" Eren insisted, thrusting the ice cream further in his direction.
Heichou, defeated, decided to knuckle down and take a lick of the ice cream pot in Eren's hand. Surprisingly, the brat was right. It was moderately tasty.
Heichou just sat there, arms crossed, observing as Eren kept scarfing down the ice cream. It was a massive undertaking – consuming that entire bowlful – but Eren never was someone to give up once he'd set his heart on something. "Heichou," Eren said thoughtfully, in-between bites, "what's your real name? Everyone always calls you Heichou, but it's not your real name. Most musicians have a stage name, I understand, but they usually give out their real one too. But you're different. You're always secretive about it."
This was the last thing Heichou wanted to reveal to this strange boy he'd only met a month ago. "Not telling," he said. Eren let out a disappointed moan. "At all. I have a dark past that might escape to the world if I tell anyone my name." Thoughts of this past hadn't been dragged up for years – and now the brat had brought the bitter memories out of the forgotten recesses of his mind. He'd never forgive himself if he started angsting.
"Oooh, a dark backstory?" Eren asked excitedly. "The kind that makes you a well-developed story character?" Heichou nodded, and for the moment, the boy was satisfied to keep eating his ice cream.
For a long time (as it took Eren a very long while to eat the entirety of his monster ice cream) they talked about the horror of the Vocaloids. About how hard it was for Heichou to stay at the top of the music charts with the Vocaloids constantly on his back, trying to shoot him down.
"Do the Vocaloids sometimes come after you with guns?" Eren asked.
"No." Heichou replied dryly.
"Why not? They're already so ruthless – a little blood on their hands wouldn't make much difference," Eren pondered, resting his hand in his chin.
"This isn't hardcore gangster rap, it's mainstream boyband pop we're dealing with. Although the Vocaloids can be criminally insane during some of their songs – we'll never forget 'The Madness of Duke Venomania' –it would be detrimental to their record sales if it was discovered they'd personally murdered Japan's most loved pop star."
"I dunno Heichou," Eren debated. "I don't trust that Gakpo one bit. He may be an eggplant, but he's rotten to the core. I mean, everyone loved Arashi, but we all remember the tragedy the Vocaloids caused for them. They... they..." Eren found it was too painful to speak about aloud. A single tear trickled down his cheek and dripped into the melting bowl of ice cream. "All our hearts bleed for Arashi. That's... that's why we have to win this competition, become chart-toppers, and make sure the Vocaloids never perform again!"
Please, please, please leave a review if you liked it. They're literally like crack. I'll be refreshing the page for hours and hours today hoping someone has written them.
Let's play a game! It's called 'Spot the Neon Genesis Evangelion reference!' There was one of those. There are waaay too many references in this, I know. I just can't help myself.
The inspiration for this chapter came from a frozen yoghurt store I went to on Tuesday. I ate just as much as Eren, trust me. The only difference between our eating was that Levi wasn't there...
Next time will be an awkward situation. Well, another. And the chapter after that... *evil yaoi fangirl smirk.
But the actual first round of SoundTitan! against the Vocaloids is on the way, too! And the emerging of Thug!Armin...