In spite of having readers who shared their vast softball knowledge with me, this is what came out.
My apologies to all athletes - as it is a subject I should never attempt to write about.
Twenty Calculations
"I've seen expectant parents waiting for the first-born to arrive who looked less nervous than Pete," Claudia said to Eileen as they gave their tickets to the person collecting them at the baseball field.
"He spent a lot of time this week practicing with Helena. Can you picture that?" Eileen said.
"Actually, I can. He described it in great detail ev-e-ry day," Claudia said as if she were in pain.
Every afternoon that week, Pete came into her office to take her through how he had instructed Helena how to stand, how to swing, and how he told her - yes it was about physics, but mostly it was about winning.
"Wow, the pressure is on Helena and Myka I guess as the guest players," Eileen mused as they took their seats in the stadium seating that had been set up on the Great Lawn section of Central Park. Of the twenty-six baseball fields within the great park, this one was chosen to accommodate the crowds of people who came to see the special invitees at this year's tournament.
It was a fundraiser put on by the softball teams of the New York Police Department and the Fire Department of New York every year at this time. It was a friendly competition for the most part. The charities that benefited from the sale of tickets and food were grateful. If the Yankees or Mets were playing that day, most people opted to see the professional teams. Today however, the Yankees would report their lowest attendance in a single day.
Helena and Myka arrived by car which drove them directly to the spot where the Mayor was standing with the members of the Press. He had long ago accepted the fact that when he shared the spotlight with his friend, Helena Wells, his spotlight often diminished. In politics, it was okay to gain favor by association and no one brought him favor like Helena.
Helena balked when she saw that the entrance to the ball field was behind the mob of reporters and photographers. Myka, however, took Helena's hand and walked directly toward them. Myka's plan to take charge of letting everyone know that Helena was no longer available was about to go public.
Helena smiled behind her Oakley sunglasses as Myka answered the question about how they got involved. "Helena and I were very pleased to be asked to participate in this wonderful fundraiser today." Helena was too busy noticing that the sunglasses she picked out for Myka matched her red uniform perfectly. Then someone asked Helena if she thought her team would beat Myka's. Helena hadn't given much thought to the different colored uniforms. Before she could straighten the reporter out, someone else asked how she liked being engaged, and Helena leaned into Myka at her side and answered, "I love being engaged to Myka."
Pete finally ushered them away from the reporters and escorted them past the crowds of people who stretched their arms out, in hopes of getting to touch Manhattan's Royal couple.
"I do not understand why he asked if my team could beat your team," Helena said to Myka and then Myka realized with all the training and preparation that Pete had given her, no one mentioned to Helena that she was on the blue team which was made of the police staff, and Myka was on the red team – the team of the firefighters.
"Helena, we're on …different teams," Myka said softly.
"No, we are not," Helena said because it was unfathomable.
"I guess they thought it would be more fun…," Myka tried.
"Ridiculous! Who is in charge?" Helena said as someone handed her a blue t-shirt with the graphic cartoonish police officer on it and handed a red one to Myka with the firefighter figure on it.
"She will not need that," Helena said and Myka realized this had to be addressed.
The only person in a more serious mood than Helena at the moment was the captain of the NYPD team. Jane Tierney may have spent her days helping out her fellow municipal workers in the Fire Department when needed, but today they were the only thing that stood between her and her straight ninth year win.
"Who is in charge?" Helena demanded and Jane heard her above the noise.
"Oh geez, here we go," the detective said, holding onto her clipboard. She pushed the baseball cap back off her brow. "How can we help you, Wells?"
"Oh good, we're just foregoing all propriety today and using surnames. As if nothing could make the sport more endearing to me," Helena said, and Myka suppressed the laugh that begged to come out.
"Myka, how are you?" Jane asked and waited for the Brit to talk.
"It would seem that an egregious error has been made," Helena started.
"Tell me about it," Jane said of the celebrity guest being on her team.
"Myka and I are not on the same team and that needs to be rectified immediately," Helena explained because she was in a good mood.
"Yeah, that was Chief Reilly's doing after finding out you didn't know how to play softball," Jane explained. "And I won't forget it."
"I cannot be on the opposite team. As Mr. Lattimer has explained, when I am on defense, I will be called upon to hit the incoming runner with my glove should I in fact have the ball in my glove," Helena said because she had listened closely.
"And…?" Jane asked, doubting either of the women would be in the position of tagging or being tagged.
"And….," Helena said because she remembered how the good detective needed everything explained in great detail, "….I am not going to be the cause of Myka losing."
"Of course you're not. Min-nel-li!" Jane yelled to the captain of the fire department's team.
"Helena, we won't be playing all that much," Myka tried, thinking it was a little late in the game to be changing rosters. Besides, she kind of liked the thought of Helena being at the same spot as she was – if she made it to base.
The thirty-five year old firefighter team captain - who took the game as seriously as Jane did – and swore his revenge each year at the St. Patrick's Day parade in March – walked over.
"Hey Ms. Bering, Frank Minnelli, you're with us over here," the handsome firefighter said.
The captain's handshake was friendly, but very strong. "Hi Mr. Minnelli," Myka said and introduced Helena.
"It's a real pleasure," he said. "Even if you're on the losing team."
"Yeah, okay well we have a problem here, Minnelli," Jane said, breaking up the greetings.
"The only problem we have, Tierney, is if you didn't bring enough money to buy us all drinks when you lose," he said to torture her.
"Oh good. More blathering between opposing sides. Another think I do not understand about sports," Helena said, getting impatient.
"Just a minute," Jane said, pulling her counterpart to the side. "They want to be on the same team."
"But we're supposed to get Ms. Bering. You know, the one who played the sport before," he said, rubbing it in.
"They're a package deal, Minnelli," Jane said, thinking she had solved her problem.
"OK, well then you take them. I'm sure you'd be honored to have both guests on your team," Frank said and smiled. Of course he meant – the two least experienced members would be on Jane's team.
Jane Tierney was not to be messed with about this game. She knew exactly what her opponent was doing.
"I would be honored to have the Mayor's guests be on my team," she said to him – making her point. If she had to take the newbies, she would at least garner favor with the Mayor.
In the meantime, Bridget had arrived with Sarah and was in the stands when she saw Myka and Helena arrive. The whole Wells Corp family was seated together. She immediately excused herself from the group and went down to wish them luck. Myka explained what the delay of game was. Bridget laughed to think Helena was running things as soon as she got there.
An exasperated Jane returned to the group.
"OK ladies, you're both on my team," Jane said, motioning for someone to get Myka a blue T-shirt.
"Oh they are so not on your team, " Bridget said, smiling and greeting Jane.
"Well, for today they are. God help me," Jane said in a low voice.
Then Bridget hugged Myka and Helena goodbye and returned to her seat. Her small white shorts exposed her long tan legs, and her light blue cotton blouse, tied at the waist showed off the reason her dresses had to be altered on top. Bridget knew the members of the team - especially certain young female officers - were staring at her. And although she smiled at them as she passed, she went back to her seat next to Sarah and took her hand.
"Do you like their outfits?" Sarah asked of the athletic wear of their two friends.
"They look great, honey," Bridget said and refrained from commenting on how it would be impossible for Helena and Myka not to look good. She was pleased that Sarah was proud.
"How is it going?" Irene asked when she came up behind Myka. Pete had pulled Helena aside to review – one last time – everything he taught her.
"Oh it's good, Irene," Myka said, a little taken aback to see the woman in casual clothes and not her usual two piece suit with silk blouse. "I like this…," Myka said of the woman's clam digger white pants and short sleeve colorful blouse that hung below her waist.
"Yes, Mr. Lattimer, I remember it all….," Helena said, trying to get away and then stopped dead in her tracks. She stood there as her eyes scanned Irene from her feet up to her head. Helena's head tilted as if she didn't know who the woman was. She never uttered a word, but she never smiled either - as she found the sight unsettling for some reason.
"You deal so well with change, Helena," Irene said because she could read her expression. "Now have fun you two, ….. and Helena?" the woman said, waiting to make sure she had Helena's attention.
"Yes?" Helena asked impatiently.
"Play nice," Irene said.
"I will if the bloody game every starts," Helena complained to Myka.
Finally, the game did begin. Myka's first time up at bat resulted in a line drive that the second baseman picked up and threw to first base in time to tag Myka out. But the first baseman happened to catch the glare on Helena's face …and dropped the ball, allowing Myka to land safely on base.
The next one up to bat, hit it over the crowd, and the police team was up - zero to two.
"Good job, Bering," Jane said as Myka came off the field.
"WAY TO GO MYKA!" Bridget yelled from the stands. "I think it was her shorts that helped her," she said to Sarah when she sat back down.
The innings came and went and the game was tied. Jane had played Helena in the outfield, where the genius surmised that based on the trajectory of the ball that was hit and the wind that she calculated to be northwesterly, and the drag coefficient – she knew exactly where the ball would land. Unfortunately, the other outfielder knew from her years of experience where to go – and they both collided. It wasn't a hard collision, but enough to knock them both down. No one was injured, although it looked as if Jane was shot because she doubled over in agony at the home run the firefighter team scored.
The score was 9 – 7 and Jane was losing. The crowd was really getting into it as the last inning came and the police team was up to bat. Pete knew how important the next few hits were. The first batter to get up was a young police officer who was terribly intimidated by his Captain. He struck out – he just wanted to get it over with.
Jane was up next and had a nice hit into center field and made it to first. She motioned to Pete to coach Helena when she was up at the plate. Helena had hit the ball twice in her previous times at bat, but both were caught and she never made it to first base.
"Now you remember what we said, right? The pitcher is throwing them low, " Pete yelled and Helena turned to look at him.
"Strike One!" the umpire called as the ball came right past Helena.
"Oh gawd," Jane said, practically bending in two. "Coach her, Pete! Don't distract her!"
Then Pete remembered how Helena needed to hear this. "Boss, he's throwing from about forty-two feet away. We clocked his pitch at sixty-two miles per hour and low," Pete said, translating the information for Helena. "Oh and boss?" he said, remembering to whom he was speaking.
"Yes, Mr. Lattimer?" Helena said.
"Left handed batters are closer to first base," he said.
It dawned on Pete that Helena was ambidextrous. Helena stopped, smiled at her coach, and took the other side of the plate.
"She can't do that!" Minnelli yelled to Jane.
"Yes, she can!" Jane answered back. Jane suspected the change of stance would throw the pitcher off and she was right.
Myka smiled as Helena turned around. "Helena – distance divided by speed," Myka yelled.
Now Helena understood what to do. By using the formula Myka gave her, Helena could calculate the time it would take the ball to arrive, thereby knowing when to swing.
"Point forty-six seconds," Helena murmured when the ball was released.
Helena swung and struck the ball to the outfield and ran to first base.
"Good job, Wells!" Jane yelled to her from second base.
The crown erupted in cheers as Myka got to up to bat. She took her stance at the plate, leaned over, and moved her feet in the dirt to find a good spot.
"You can do this Myka!" Bridget yelled above the crowd for all to hear.
Jane waited nervously at second, Helena watched closely at first.
"Strike One!" the umpire yelled when Myka swung and missed.
"That's okay, Myka," Jane yelled to encourage her last hope.
"Strike Two!" the umpire called and the crowd booed because it was questionable.
Jane knew immediately where to look. "Don't move, Wells. Don't get off that base," Jane pleaded when she saw Helena moving toward the home plate. If Helena got off base, even just to share her inner most thoughts with the Umpire who made the bad call, she could be tagged out.
"Whaddaya blind?" yelled Bridget from the stands, voicing what everyone was thinking. The crowd cheered her on.
Frank Minnelli called time and went to the pitcher's mound to talk to his pitcher. To Helena, time out meant for everyone. So she took this as her opportunity to walk back to home plate to talk to Myka. The crowd applauded as she did.
Myka expected Helena to provide detail analysis of the drag coefficient, wind speed, and curvature of the earth. Instead, she walked straight over to Myka …and kissed her ….."For good luck," Helena said, smiling.
"Thank you, Helena," Myka smiled – and relaxed.
The Brit walked back to first base as Jane held her head thinking any second now, the game would resume and Helena would be tagged out on her sojourn back to her place. Minnelli finished with this pitcher and all eyes caught Helena giving the hand signal to get the game going again. The crowd erupted into laughter. Helena may have been the guest, but she was certainly in charge.
"That's Helena for you," the Mayor laughed as he rubbed elbows with his constituents.
The crowd settled down and a hush fell over them as the last pitch was thrown. Myka stepped forward and swung – connecting with the ball and sending it over the heads of the players in the outfield and into the stands.
HOME RUN!
"Boss! You'll hug her later," Pete yelled when Helena stood there waiting for Myka to join her at first base. Helena did as she was encouraged to do –and ran the bases. Myka touched home plate and the Police Team won! The players charged the field and hoisted Myka up in the air and the spectators cheered and clapped.
Their friends rushed down to congratulate them on the big win. No one was happier than Jane, who thanked both Helena and Myka for playing so well.
"I don't know what you were so worried about, Jane," Bridget said to the much relieved team Captain.
"Neither of them had any real experience!" Jane tried to explain as the crowd got ready to get to McSorley's Ale House for the post-game celebration.
"Jane, I have it on good authority that those two always round third base and make it to home," Bridget said affectionately of her friends.
Myka and Helena held hands as they walked off the field together. Jane pleaded with them to come to the celebration and Helena waited for Myka to answer for both of them. Myka said they would – and Helena nodded.
"Do you mind if we go for a little while?" Myka asked Helena to be sure.
"I will go wherever you go, Myka," Helena said, leaning in as they walked past the cheering crowds.
Myka wrapped her arm around Helena as they walked back to the townhouse. They would get changed and meet up with their friends. They were steps away from the townhouse when Helena stopped suddenly.
"I don't think I cared for the way Irene was dressed today," Helena said, remembering what really bothered her about the whole event.
"I know, sweetie," Myka said, because only she would not be surprised by the fact that Helena would complain about such a thing.
"I hope she doesn't do that again," Helena said – and meant it.
"I don't think you have to worry," Myka said reassuringly.
The headline in the Daily News the next day read HOME RUN! - along with the picture of Helena kissing Myka.
The Mayor's approval rating climbed the charts, the charities received the most they ever had from the Guns and Hoses Softball Event, and the best part – Helena massaged Myka's aches and pains until they completely disappeared.
All the way...to home plate.