Bucky sat quietly on the edge of the hospital bed again, uneasily allowing himself to be examined.
"You'll make it, soldier." The nurse smiled at him, gathering up her equipment. He looked blankly through her. "Just, no more climbing out windows for a while." She glanced at Steve who stood beside Bucky, one hand on his shoulder in silent support.
"No ma'am. I'll keep him out of trouble."
"Considering the kind of trouble that guy gets into... I'd say you'd sure as hell better."
"How many people?" Bucky's face voice was flat. He hadn't moved, but his eyes locked firmly onto Steve's.
"Don't think about it-"
"How many?"
Steve hesitated. There was no use dancing around it. It would come out sooner or later.
"A couple dozen confirmed." He answered reluctantly.
"Confirmed…" Bucky repeated vaguely. "There were more."
"Bucky…"
"They ordered me to kill you." His expression still hadn't changed. Steve couldn't tell if it was shell-shock or just a leftover of the mental programming.
"I know. But you didn't."
"I tried to. I wanted to." Bucky's eyes were unfocused, looking at something only he could see. "I knew you. I wasn't sure how, but I knew you, and I still -" His voice faltered and he pulled his knees up to his chest, coiling tightly into himself.
"They made you fight me, but they couldn't make you kill me. You're stronger than they ever were."
He felt Bucky's shoulder trembling under his hand. The enormity of it all was finally hitting home. He sat down on the bed and put a reassuring arm around his friend.
"I almost killed my best friend…"
"Buck…"
"I beat you almost to death and you were just going to let me?"
"I lost you too many times already. I couldn't do it again. If that's what it took to get you back, that's what I was going to do."
Bucky sat silently, staring at the floor for a few moments.
"... You always were too dumb to run away from a fight, weren't you?"
Steve smiled slightly at that, in spite of himself. This was the Bucky Barnes he knew.
"You saved my life. I know you did. Nobody else could've pulled me out."
"I had to." Bucky looked up at him like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"You could'a let me drown, but you didn't."
"No…" Bucky's eyes dropped to the metal arm, still tightly banding his knees, as if he was seeing it for the first time. "I couldn't have."