AN: I am crying with every single one of you. My heart hurts so badly and I've decided not to watch that episode to spare myself the loss of my beloved. Let's all stick together and cry together. If you want to talk my PM is open for you. I knew how sad you all probably are so I've worked on this all day to get it out to all of you so we could have a bit of happiness. To say this wasn't hard to write would be a lie. I love you all. Make sure to continue to read and review. Also to the guest that told me my writing has improved; thank you so much that means a lot. Now here's the big scene guys. -Lanie x

Tara kissed him deeply, pulling him as close to her as she could. His hands rested on her ass, digging into the flesh, pulling her flush against him. They both had the same idea, they wanted no distance in between them. As they pressed themselves together, the feel of his bare chest against his felt like a electric current ran through her. Her hand tangled in his hair as he began to kiss along her jaw and down her neck. He nipped at the skin and earned himself a whimper from Tara.

She had never felt this way about anyone before. No one turned her on the way he had. Yanking on his hair as he stopped sucking on her neck and gave her a devilish smirk. Jax picked her up forcing her to wrap her legs around him. In the next instant she was against the wall, and his tongue was pressing against her own.

His hand firmly held onto her jaw as he continued his assault against her lips. Jax didn't realize that Tara had this big of an effect on him though it really shouldn't have surprised him. She brought out foreign feelings in him on a daily basis. He moved his hand down her neck, and past her collar bone until it reached his desired area.

He reached behind her and undid the clasp, letting the straps fall over her shoulders. Jax set her down and rid her of the garment. Tara suddenly got nervous, just as she had been earlier that day. The way he looked at her, brought a smile to her face and eased her nerves. His lips found moved along her chest until he found her nipple, which he gently sucked on. The gasps she was was making made his arousal grow. After awhile he gave the same attention to her other breast.

A nervous huff passed her lips as they pressed eagerly to the boys - this was it, this was the moment she'd waited for. His hand wander to the waistband of her jeans and pushed them off along with her underwear, once she was bare his hand moved between her legs. Without even realizing what she was doing she parted her legs, and he began to stroke her gently.

He broke the kiss and pressed needy kisses along her jaw. "You're so wet." He mumbled as he circled the nub causing her to jerk at the new sensation. Tara felt him smirked against her jaw. She felt him press his erection against her leg. "Like that baby."

"I want you Jackson." She mumbled.

"I know baby." He said sweetly as he continued to circle her clit.

Jax knew that her first time might not be enjoyable so he wanted to give her pleasure first. He kissed down her body and laid between her legs. His eyes locked on hers and he smiled. "You're so beautiful, Tara." He watched as her blush started at her chest and rose to her cheeks. Jax leaned down and ran his tongue along her slit. He explored her folds and flicked his tongue against the swollen nub.

"Shit jax." She groaned out, her hands holding his head to her.

As he continued his ministrations, he heard her begin to grow louder. Once her legs started to quiver he knew that she was almost there. Tara didn't know what was going on, she felt a sensation deep in her stomach and she started to quiver all over. Nothing had ever felt like this, nothing had ever felt so good before.

"Come on baby let go."

Tara let out a loud moan she reached her high. He crawled back up her body and nuzzled her neck as she panted. He let her ride out her orgasm and made sure that she was alright. He slid a condom over himself before he climbed on top of her. She watched him and realized how real this all was. Tara was about to lose her virginity, to someone she really cared about.

"Are you sure you want this?" He asked before doing anything.

Tara smiled at him and nodded. "Yes Jackson."

He stroked her cheek and smiled softly at her as he guided himself to her entrance. Jax gave her a look asking for approval and she nodded her head. With that he inched inside of her, not wanting to hurt her. He slowly kept moving, until her hand gripped his bicep tightly. Jax looked at her to see her eyes tightly closed, with tears falling from her eyes. He stilled and brushed away the tears.

Tara never expected to feel this sort of pain, Anna had warned her that it would hurt but she didn't think the word hurt didn't describe the searing pain she was feeling. When she felt the tears roll down her face, she tried to calm herself down. Crying in her eyes was showing a weakness and didn't like to have others see her that way. Once she felt his hand on her cheek she calmed her down some.

"Baby I'm so sorry." He whispered.

"It's okay." She mumbled.

He leaned down and kissed her softly and pulled away once she relaxed against him. "Okay?"

"Okay." Tara confirmed, she just wanted to get this over with.

The pain continued as he pushed back inside of her, she bit down on her bottom lip to hold back the cries that threatened to fall from her lips. She knew that if he knew how badly this hurt her that he would stop. And as much pain she was feeling in the moment she could feel it starting to ease up. It wasn't feeling pleasurable but it was becoming more comfortable.

Jax groaned as he pushed inside of her, she was was tight around him. He didn't realize how badly he wanted his until know. This wasn't like the times he fucked all those girls, this was special, this was real. He leaned over and pressed his lips against her softly. He nuzzled her neck as he felt it growing in the pit of his stomach, nothing had ever felt more right than being buried inside of her.

"Tara" He breathed out softly.

She smiled at him and moved her hips to meet his as it started to feel better.

"Jackson." She moaned back to him.

Feeling her hips moving with his was undoing, he felt himself begin to release as he called out. He slowed down his movements before stopping all together. Tara knew that it was over, she didn't get much out of it but that didn't matter to her, she made Jax feel pleasure. She ran her head against his back, feeling the sweat against her fingertips.

Her face scrunched up in pain and she winced as he eased out of her. Jax pulled the condom from himself and nodded towards her door.

"I'll be right back babe."

Tara nodded and rolled towards her side of the bed. Looking down her hand moved to fist her sheets. There was spots of blood all over them. She swallowed the lump in her throat as he walked in, she let go of them and smirked as she looked at her naked man. It was really the first time she really looked at him and appreciated how good looking he really was.

Jax smiled and climbed back into her bed, they both knew that her Dad wouldn't be home anytime soon. He pulled her into his arm, and she laid her head on his chest. Tara felt sweaty and gross but being in his arms seemed to make that go away.

"How are you feeling?" He asked as he dropped a kiss to her head.

"I'm sore." She looked up at him and tilted her head.

"I'm sorry it hurt and-"

She covered his mouth with her hand. "Stop, it was fine. I've never felt closer to you than I did or than I do now."

He gave her a sad look and nodded. "It'll be so much better next time baby. I promise."

"I'll hold you too that." She laughed and laid her hand against his chest and threw her arm around his stomach.

Jax held her close to him as she started to fall asleep. He looked down at her and smiled softly. He softly ran his hand through her hair.

"I love you baby." He whispered before he too, fell asleep.

…

They were laying in bed together, him just holding her to him as they talked about anything and everything. It seemed that when the two of them were together that all of their demons were gone. All that existed was each other.

Tara heard the car outside and shot up from his arms. Tara stumbled out of the bed and pulled clothes on before leaving the room giving Jax a hasty, 'don't move' on her way out. As she walked she felt just how sore she was. She grimaced as her dad walked through the door. He grunted at her and stumbled to get inside.

"Dad, let me help you okay?" She told him as she walked over.

"Room." He mumbled.

Tara nodded as she helped him get to his room. Dean Knowles slipped and cut his hand on the side table in his room. The daughter looked down at his hand as he laid in his bed.

"Shit." He murmured seeing the blood.

"Stay still." She told him before running off to the bathroom. She rummaged through the drawers until she found the first aid kit.

Tara walked back into the room to see her bad passed out. She sighed as she cleaned it out and put the butterfly bandages on his cut before covering it so he wouldn't rub the bandages off. She cleaned up and walked back to her room. Slumping against the door.

Jax gave her a look of confusion as she walked over and crawled in next to him. She kissed his bare shoulder and wrapped her arm around him.

"My Dad cut his hand. I had to clean it and shit."

"Not the first time?"

"No this happens a lot."

"At least I know you'll be able to take care of me doc." He shrugged.

Tara bit her lip before smiling brightly. "I can't wait the day people call me Dr. Knowles."

"How about Dr. Teller" Jax teased her and kissed the corner of her mouth.

"I'll settle for Dr. Knowles-Teller." She turned her head to met his kiss this time.

"Only I could wish to be that lucky." He told her.

Tara knew that she shouldn't get hopeful that they'll be together forever. She knew that high school relationships don't last. She would be naive to think otherwise. But when she was around him, that's all she wanted. Was to be his and no one else's.

"We've got a long time before any of that."

"Might as well enjoy the now or some shit."

"You're good with words sometimes."

"Runs in the family."

"Aww bikers are sweethearts." She teased him.

"Babe wait until you met the guys, you'll think differently." He growled.

She laughed and wiggled against him.

"Round two?" He suggested.

"Really?"

He didn't reply but roll on top of her and started to kiss her filled with passion. He thought about what he said to her earlier when she was falling asleep. He felt it but he wasn't so sure that he wanted to be the first person to say it. He wanted to hear it from her. To know that she felt that way about him before he embarrassed himself.

Tara knew deep down that she was in love with him. She just needed to start to believe that she did. It was a scary feeling for her. One she wasn't used to, then again she could assume that Jax is feeling the same way. He wasn't used to being in love either. She smiled against his lips and tangled her hands in his hair. She was happy with decisions, and she couldn't wait for her future.