Chapter XV

Reunion Interrupted
"This being Yuffie, she also managed to burn down a city block." - Cloud

"I've had about all I can take of this."

Tifa, bone tired, had not showered in three days of plodding through endless desert. They had indeed met that worthless Hojo, who not only refused to talk but also refused to let go of his ankles while he hopped in circles. On second thought, he did talk, if "Squirrel boy give squirrel girl a bog wet squirrel kiss?" counted as talking. And he had flicked out his forked, green tongue far enough to lick his own elbow. From this sprang Tifa's Rule: never date a man with removable eyeballs.

With all that, Raine had pulled farther ahead, even after pausing to drill through Fulsom's Crossing like a lance through butter. Unlike creatures in the wild, the livestock in those rows of barns had succumbed in an avalanche of death, a million animal lives snuffed out as if Raine had thrown a plastic tarp over the barns and turned on the gas. Shinra would probably release a cover story, maybe how a power failure cut off the cooling system. Pictures of earth movers burying mountains of dead pigs might turn everyone in Midgar into instant vegetarians.

She doubted if she could look at a pork roast again.

Leaving Hojo to his frog hopping delirium, they had found Raine's stolen truck, out of fuel. Buggy tracks struck out across the desert following an old cart track, giving them the most bone grinding, knee bruising ride Tifa had ever endured. She felt as if her kidneys had tried to bounce out the back of her head. What a hoot; Raine had never intended to meet Hojo after all. Sad she missed out on that green tongue though.

"Finally. The end of the desert," Cloud said.

"Wark wark!" Their chocobo rocketed off for the line of green. Tifa grabbed the railing and barely kept from bouncing over. Cloud strained to slow the giant chicken, the carriage jolting behind it like loose cans under a "Just Married" sign. The wheels careered off a pair of boulders, forcing Cloud to lean his body hard to starboard to keep them from flipping. As they neared the greensward, the chocobo bolted even faster. A few pitches and lunges later, they blundered onto the grass where Cloud, having long since given up slowing the creature, drew his sword and cut the harness.

"Wark wark!" The chocobo shot free like a rocket bird, the tangle of reins jerking Cloud's sword from his hand.

Cloud braked the chariot with a growl, insulting the chocobo's ancestry. Tifa cast a Cure spell on him, if only to stop him from dreaming up new chicken recipes. Said chocobo plowed into a pool from a nearby stream and embarked on a five minute happy chicken dance.

"Vincent. You say you have a plan to stop my mother?" Cloud spoke to swallow his chocobo rancor.

"I did," Vincent said. "I was adding an attachment to my gun when that wild ride broke it off. Once I find my materia, hopefully still in the bottom of the carriage, I will assist you in barbecuing that chicken."

"Can you eat that big of a drumstick? Never mind. My mother is too far ahead of us now. That time we wasted with Hojo - "

"No matter. She appears to be in remission. Again."

"And she could flare back up. She must have sated herself at Fulsom's crossing. Good lord. At least we can try to cut her off at the Gongaga ferry."

"Assuming we can convince your favorite chocobo to behave," Tifa said, finally willing to release her grip on the railing.

"Wark?"

The chocobo thrust its wet head into the carriage. Cloud looked up in time for it to shake off the water like a wet dog.

"I swear I'll kill that - "

"Wark?"

Vincent handed Tifa a spare set of reins. "You need to drive. Cloud has a sword to find."

Tifa hopped out to harness the ornery bird, though she couldn't stay mad at the cute beast for long.

"Easy. Easy old girl - "

"Wark!"

"Old boy? Sorry. Did that mean old Cloud scare you with that big sword of his? What were we thinking, driving you across the desert like that?"

"Wark."

"You must be tired. I know I am. When we get to the Gongaga Ferry, I promise we'll put in for the night. For now, though," She cast a Cure and Revive spell on the bird. It fluffed up its feathers in pride.

"Are you done conspiring against me?" Cloud hopped back into the carriage and leaned on the front railing, chin on clasped hands.

"Wark?"

"Yes, Cloud," Tifa said. "What do you mean, conspiring?"

Cloud started to reply when his PHS chirped.

"Yes. Really? No, no luck. Again? That's odd. What? You're kidding! No, there must be a mistake. What? No. Tell Yuffie not to tangle with - no, we're - I agree. Are you sure? Great. We're on it."

By this time, Tifa had climbed into the driver's seat. She picked up the reins.

"What was all that about?"

"Marlene is not cut out to be a receptionist."

Tifa cocked her head. "You rather she tend bar?"

"I'd rather she become a sumo wrestler. Anything. Somehow she got the idea Yuffie asked Barret to marry her."

Tifa yelped and dropped the reins.

"And then," Cloud said, "the little twerp asked when you and I were going to get married."

"Oh?" Tifa cocked her head. "What did you say?"

"And now," Cloud hurried on, "We find out Carmine is in Wutai. Yuffie and Barret managed to fight her off with the help of angry cooks. This being Yuffie, she also managed to burn down a city block. All on the same day she managed to convince Barret to dress up as a nun."

"Now that," Vincent said, "I would like to see."

"In Cosmo Canyon, our miracle worker John has wandered off. Vanished. And no, they did not have time to redo the ritual. Seems the elders would not increase the miracle budget. Anyway, Aeris must know where he is, because she has vanished too."

"Oh dear," Tifa said.

"Ordinarily I wouldn't worry. Except Marlene, our unimpeachable source, said she saw a pink ghost sucking out John's brain the night before he disappeared."

"Pink ghost?"

"I hope," Vincent said, "this pink ghost knew what it was getting into."

"So now, we need to hurry to the ferry station, where we can change chocobos."

"Wark?" said the chocobo innocently.

"And then, double time to Cosmo Canyon."

"In that case, give me a few minutes. I need to dunk myself in that stream."

Later, feeling partly alive again, Tifa flicked the reins. The chocobo strutted off in an oh-so-innocent trot.

They rode in silence for a while until Cloud said, "Teef, you say Raine spoke of a reunion back at the way-station. We thought the reunion was with Hojo but she ended up ignoring Hojo."

"Could mean she has taste," Tifa said.

"Hojo has experimented on himself, not to mention many others, injecting cells from the original Jenova. The reunion, as you recall, consisted of all of Jenova's parts trying to reassemble into a whole. But all of Hojo's Jenova subjects were damaged. Most of them failed to reach the reunion point."

"And Sephiroth killed a lot of those who did."

"In fact," Cloud said, "only the body of Jenova - carried by Sephiroth - along with Hojo, myself, and Vincent, met in the North Crater. The actual reunion, or joining, did not occur. Except - " Cloud gained a far-off look in his eyes.

"You aren't obsessing about your number again, are you?"

Vincent spoke up. "Lucrecia. The mother of Sephiroth. She did not show, and she was even more heavily infused than Cloud or I."

"Something must have stopped her. Assuming she's alive."

"I don't believe she is dead. Jenova, you may recall, are remarkably hard to kill."

"Raine didn't show up either," Tifa said. "When did Hojo animate her? Did he do it earlier and keep her dormant? He couldn't have done anything after the North Crater. His mind was too fried by then."

Vincent checked his notes. "Cait Sith told me they found Hojo's laboratory near Costa del Sol, so he must have kept her dormant there. Her activity, near as they can tell, began the same time as the events in the Ancient Capital. The return visit, with John and Aeris."

"Reunion." Tifa snapped up her finger. "Not with Hojo or the original Jenova, but - "

"With our Jenova, John Philip Sorea? Do you suppose the boy knows about this?"

Cloud snorted.

"Do we let them meet?" Tifa asked. "What might happen?"

If we value our lives, Teef, we will be on another continent when they do. But she is my mother, at least partly, and I don't want that crazy kid to hurt her."

"John won't hurt her."

"Teef, that kid could set a building on fire trying to light a birthday cake. He is a loose mako cannon."

"He told me he met your mother's spirit back in Nibelheim. Maybe that's why she is seeking him out."

"Then I want to get to him before she does. I know we'll regret it if we don't."

"I agree."

"I have noticed," Vincent said, "Raine is at her most virulent when John is sick. After the ritual at Cosmo Canyon completed, she became placid."

"Then the kid blows his mind resurrecting Bugenhagen and my mother goes on a pig-leeching rampage."

"So that's why you demanded Bugenhagen re-run the ritual?"

"You know me, Teef. Save the pigs."

"What do you make of the pink ghost?"

"Give me a break. John versus a pink ghost? The kid drank it like a strawberry milkshake."

"On that note we had best hurry, for your mother's sake."

"He must be cured again. You said they didn't run another ritual?"

"No. He disappeared. According to Marlene. But also according to Marlene, we need to think about wedding gifts."

"I wish," she mumbled, but yanked her feelings inside.

Cloud stared into the distance. Vincent rattled around in the back of the carriage, still chasing pieces of his beloved gun. She couldn't help wondering if John had struck out to meet Raine somewhere in the jungle where no one would find them.

"Just keep that crazy bird from killing us."

Tifa shuddered as she realized how much the thick bladed stream grass resembled Hojo's tongue.