Anonymous: "You're not wearing that."

He cranes his neck forward and sniffs the tee shirt. "It smells fine."

She doesn't seem convinced. "Isn't that the shirt you wore on a stakeout, like, three days ago?"

He smiles. "You remember what I was wearing? That's so cute!"

"It's not cute. That-" she says, pointing to the stinky wad of fabric in his hands- "is disgusting."

"It's not disgusting, it's eco friendly."

"Not true. What's most important here is that we were in that car for overseven hours-"

"Psssh. Give or take."

"-and you kept complaining about how you were sweating your insides out!"

"I don't think that was the exact wording, I'm sure I sounded more articulate than that-"

"That isn't even… it's not-" She tosses her hands in the air. "No, Deeks. Just no."

"Why do you care so much?"

"Because this dinner is important!"

He grins at her concern but finds it unnecessary. "Babe, it's just dinner and beers at O'Malley's. Don't worry about it."

"It's a triple date!"

Deeks' eyebrows instantly furrow. "I'm sorry… a what now?"

Kensi folds her arms. "A triple date. You and me, Michelle and Sam, Callen and Joelle."

He sits back on the edge of the bed and chuckles. "Okay, first of all, it's you and I, not you and me. Second, it's just his girlfriend. Not that big of a deal."

She snorts with laughter and folds her arms. "You don't get it, do you?"

"Get what?"

"This."

"This, meaning…"

"This dinner. It's a big deal. For Callen, at least."

"How do you figure?"

She smiles. "When was the last time Callen had a girlfriend? One that he showed off to us?"

Deeks wrinkles his forehead and looks to the ceiling. "Um… I mean, well…"

"Exactly. This never happens."

"Wait. Hold up." He tosses the tee shirt over his shoulder because yeah, she's right, it's gross. "Are you trying to tell me that he hasn't had a girlfriend in nine years?"

"Is it really that hard for you to believe?"

Deeks shrugs. "I mean, his baby blues are piercing. I don't know how women can resist."

Kensi laughs. "I'm gonna tell him that you said that. And Joelle."

"I'm pretty sure she already knows it."

"She probably does."

He nods slowly, looking to the ground. "But… nine years?"

"Maybe he had a girlfriend," she offers with a shrug. "I dunno, he could've. Maybe he just didn't wanna bring her around us?"

"Probably didn't trust you vultures not to scare her off."

Kensi lifts her eyebrows. "Or trust you not to pounce."

Deeks smiles- the widest, most sickeningly sweet grin he can possibly manage. "I've had my sights set on you from day one, Kensalina."

She rolls her eyes and leans forward, lifting his smelly old tee shirt off the ground and dropping it into the hamper.

"I'm sure you have. Now go find something a little less disgusting to wear, please?"

Deeks watches her as she walks out of the room, a basket of laundry balanced between her hip and her forearm. He honestly isn't sure when she started acting like such a 'wife' but can't force himself to be bothered by it.

"Yes, princess."