Raising a child is hard. James had never realised exactly how hard it would be, not having had much regular contact with kids until his own came along.
He's never slept well, not since he was seven really. Nightmares have been a constant problem, and Chrissy coming and going all hours to work never really helped, not to mention his own irregular working hours. And now there's a little boy in their house, and little boys apparently do not like to sleep for a straight eight hours, no matter how tired Mummy and Daddy are.
Sam is just starting to walk now, toddling around at a rate of knots, and its causing James no end of worry. He dreads a thump followed by loud screams, easily letting everyone know that he's fallen over. Take your eyes off the eleven month old for a minute, and he's suddenly off in his and Chrissy's bedroom, trying to climb up the bookcase. Needless to say, any heavy books are now on the bottom shelf, where they can't fall on top of Sam during one of his adventures.
Speaking of needing to watch his son, the boy seems intent on tasting everything he finds. Today alone, James has rescued a button, two beads, and a penny from the little boy's mouth. God knows what he's going to do once Sam has more teeth. He has a mini heart attack every time it happens as well, mentally running through the application of the Heimlich manoeuvre on a child.
Whenever the boy is ill, its him that worries. Chrissy being a nurse of course, knows exactly what to do and how much worry is warranted. James just panics, convinced that the rash is meningitis, or the cough is pnuemonia, until Chrissy gives him that look and tells him to go and get the Calpol.
His musing is interrupted by Chrissy coming behind the sofa and squeezing his shoulder, wrapped in her dressing gown. She smiles at him, and he smiles back, finger to his lips. His eleven month old son stirs on his chest, little hands clutching James' t-shirt as he rubs Sam's back.
Raising a child is an almost vertical learning curve that leaves you nervous and exhausted nearly all the time.
Raising a child is the hardest thing James has ever tried to do.
Sam sighs quietly in his sleep and a small smile graces the little boy's face as he snuggles in further.
James wouldn't change it for the world.