Twenty Years Later- Bunbunmaru Spirit News archives
Amanojaku flips entirety of Gensokyo for a day!
Like, the day before yesterday, a totally freaky flip of all sorts of things happened yesterday! Like, I felt totally weird when I got up, and that was because a totally freaky Amanojaku had flipped things around for a whole day! I, like, totally didn't feel like documenting news stories that day, and when I went over to Aya's house, she gave me a hug and called me her friend! We all, like, wore our clothes inside out, and I'm pretty sure I saw one girl wearing a skirt on her head!
But, like, even though I didn't want to write news, I felt more willing than ever to totally explore the world! Like, Remilia was super-nice to me and offered me tea for no reason, and her human maid seemed all nasty and bitter, it was so strange... the younger sister, though, she seemed the same as ever, although she was expressing fear about how strangely the two of them were acting. Living people were in the Netherworld, and Princess Yuyuko said she didn't feel like eating... even the Prismrivers didn't want to play music!
It was, like, totally crazy, totally, totally crazy. Reimu and Dawitsu were drinking tea together and acting like friends! Like, what sort of twisted person would do that? Well, like, I guess the culprit was sorta twisted... she is Miss Seija Kijin, an Amanojaku who, like, totally wants to flip everything around. She was floating around in the sky, laughing the whole time as she watched chaos unfold, however, for some strange reason, the next day, everything was like, totally normal again.
I went out on that day and found her walking around the mountain plains with a sad look on her face, and I, like, felt a little sorry for her, and totally asked her what was the matter...
Hatate: Hey, like, stop!
Seija: Stay away! I'll run if you come any closer!
Hatate: Um... run away, then?
Seija: Fine, I'll stop.
Hatate: Um... like, why are you so sad?
Seija: I'm not sad.
Hatate: Like, you totally are!
Seija: I, like, totally am not!
Hatate: Okay, you can, like, stop opposing me now.
Seija: I can't stop opposing you.
Hatate: Um... uh... don't stop opposing me?
Seija: I'll stop opposing you... wait, no, because then I am opposing her, which means I'm not, which means...
Like, she then fainted after that, and I totally took her into my house when she was unconscious for totally not weird reasons at all. When she woke up, I made her some tea, and asked her some more questions.
Hatate: Like, wake up, sleepy head! I made you some tea!
Seija: I don't want to wake up. I don't want tea...
Hatate: Fine, I'll, like, throw it away!
Seija: Give me the tea!
Hatate: Jeez, I can see why no-one likes you...
Seija: No-one likes me! That's wonderful!
Hatate: Uh... what?
Seija: I'm not telling you again.
Hatate: This is, like, really annoying...
Seija: Good.
Hatate: Okay, will you, like, do me the kindness of keeping why you flipped everyone in Gensokyo secret?
Seija: Ha! Nice try, but I'll tell everyone! I flipped it because I wanted to see what would happen if everyone was how I wanted to be...
Hatate: Please, please don't tell me how that worked out for you...
Seija: I hated it. Everyone was nice to me... it was like something out of a nightmare!
Hatate: Um... so, why'd you do it? Surely you'd know it'd end up that way...
Seija: I'm not telling you.
Hatate: DAMN IT!
Seija: There is no God to damn people.
Hatate: You idiot! Kanako is a Goddess, and I'm sure she could damn people!
Seija: She's not a Goddess, she's a kidney bean! Kidney beans don't damn people, silly...
Hatate: Like, I should have got Aya to do this...
Seija: No, you're the better reporter!
Hatate: Oh, you're like, making me blush. I can't be that good, can I?
Seija: You're better than Aya. Aya's a terrible reporter.
Hatate: Oh, you're just saying that...
Seija: No, I mean it from the bottom of my heart.
Hatate: Oh, like, you're too kind...
Seija: I'm a nasty girl...
Hatate: Like, that sounded like flirtation...
Seija: I meant it in a platonic way.
Hatate: Like, my head hurts... uh... where was I? Oh yeah, like, is how you managed to flip everyone in Gensokyo a secret?
Seija: No. I just flipped them, like... this.
etataH: I say, old chap, I appear to have been reversed! Why am I writing what is being said? I'm no reporter...
Seija: Yes you are.
etataH: I feel most queer. I do believe I must evict you from my house to ask myself what I am doing with my life...
Seija: Please can I stay?
etataH: I do not see the harm, I suppose. Very well, I shall offer you... er... no hospitality, for a long time, at least.
Seija: I guess I can stay for a short while.
And, like, after that, I spent a little time with the strange girl, but, like, didn't feel like writing down any more of our conversation. I, like, don't know what came over me, but once the girl left, I felt like I was normal again.
I, like, don't want to meet with Seija Kijin again. She's, like, a strange girl who never stops disagreeing with you. Plus, she, like, made me speak all stupid! It's not fair! I guess that's what I get for trying to interview an incident causer. Next time, Aya can do it.
Article written by Hatate Himekaidou
Present-day hindsight: I... put this one into the archive because I felt sorry for Hatate. Plus, for some reason, I was thinking very highly of Hatate when I made that decision, something I never normally do... oh, that's what happened. DAMN YOU, YOU AMANOJAKU!