"You're sorry?" The girl said as her cold glare at the two hardened. "Is that all you two have to say for yourselves?" Beavis and Butthead only anxiously glanced at each other before they could continue trying to defuse the situation.

"Um, you have nice boobs." Beavis said, pointing out the girl's hospital gown exposing her. "Oh good. I was hoping my breasts would be seen by perfect strangers today. Check mark that fucking box..." The girl sarcastically quipped. "Uh, are you okay?" Butthead asked. "Oh, don't even worry about it! I'm doing GREAT! Peachy keen jelly bean!"

The duo started to smile in relief before the girl continued. "Oh wait, no, I LOOK LIKE A TOILET PAPER PIRATE!" The girl bellowed in pure fury as the two jumped back. The girl seemed to have noticed the two shaking as she continued snarking. "Hey, bozos! Why don't you two take a better look at me? You might even see my dignity somewhere in there!"

Beavis and Butthead could only glance at each other when Butthead put a wad of dollar bills on the girl's desk. "We have like, money for your medical bills or whatever you call them..." "Trying to butter me up, huh?" The girl sneered at the duo. "Well it ain't gonna work! When I get outta this cast, you two better own some running shoes!"

Beavis and Butthead backed up a bit, intimidated by the threat. "Oh, what's with the scared looks? Too scared a helpless little girl like me could more than likely kick your ass at any moment?" The two faltered at this and took a little offense to that remark. "Uh, we're like, trying to help you and you're treating us like crap!"

"Can you really blame me?" The girl glared. "After all, one of you beat me against a pole like a dog!" Beavis nervously chuckled at that memory. "Erm, it was an accident! It won't happen again!" And with that, the duo left, leaving the girl to wallow in her own misery. "The nerve of those two morons! Sending me here and they have the nerve to show their ugly mugs around my face at my worst!" The girl scoffed as her nurse came in...

Finally, Beavis and Butthead were outside the hospital, contemplating the situation. "That chick, like, hates us." "Yeah, ermheh! What do we do?" "Uh, I don't know..." Before the duo could say anything else, a bright glow appeared in front of the duo and eventually revealed itself to be a tiny cupid-like fairy. More silence ensued until...

"Uh, who and what the hell are you?" Butthead pointed at the little fairy who giggled in response. "I'm Q-Piddy, matchmaking extraordinaire!" "Erm, what now?" Beavis simply said, confused. "Believe it or not, today's your lucky day!" Beavis and Butthead's eyes widen. "WHOA! You mean today's the day we can finally get some guns!? "Yeah, yeah, yeah! I wanna burn stuff! FIRE! FIRE! FIRE!" The fairy only shook her head. "No, I mean, I saw what happened earlier at the park! You really knocked that girl out good!"

"Oh..." Beavis and Butthead paled, evidently thinking this fairy was about to condemn the duo and drag them to Hell. Before things could escalate, Q-Piddy simply reassured the duo. "Oh, don't worry! I'm not going to hurt you! I'm gonna help you get a date with that girl!" The duo now lightened up. "WHOA! You mean we're finally gonna score!?" Beavis excitedly shouted. "I've been waiting for this since the very first time I saw porn!" Butthead laughed as the duo chanted. "So, tell us how we can get that girl to stop hating us so we can score?" Butthead then requested from Q-Piddy.

"Oh, that! Well, that girl's name was Cassie. She doesn't really have health insurance so she needs to pay her medical bills but, I see you two already paid her bills, so maybe, JUST maybe, she'll befriend you and you can work your way up from there!" Beavis and Butthead smiled at each other. "We're there, dude!" The two hi-fived each other as the fairy disappeared before...

-SMACK!- -BASH!-

"Ow! "Ugh!" "THAT was for beating me up earlier!" Beavis and Butthead rubbed their heads as they turned to look at Cassie, good as new with arms crossing as she gave the two a cold stare. "Uh, so, uh, Cassie, was it? How the hell are you already out?" Cassie then turned away. "Look, don't ask me! I'm not the one writing this stupid fanfiction!" "Erm, how are you doing?" Beavis then asked. "Oh, other than the fact that I'm still pretty pissed at you, I'm actually quite fine-hey, wait! How did you know my name!?"

Beavis and Butthead glanced at each other nervously, trying to come up with a believable answer for Cassie, because, let's face it, a love fairy told you a girl's name just won't work, dumbasses. "Never mind, I'm still a bit sore from that injury, and I don't feel like hurting my hands hitting you two bozos." The duo sighed in relief.

"Anyways, I'm actually feeling a bit grateful right now, since you did pay my bills for me, but where did you even get it? Your dad's vacation savings?" Beavis and Butthead only furrowed their eyebrows. "Uh, we have jobs you know!" Butthead said. "Yeah! And we don't even know who our dads are!" Beavis added.

Cassie stammered a little before shaking her head. "Well look at Old Moneybags here, it's the least you could've done after running me down like a dog!" Cassie and the duo parted ways. "I think this could be the start of something great, Beavis!" Butthead said, excited that he was gonna finally score, even if it means having to get on the good side of that crabby girl. "YEAH! WE'RE FINALLY GONNA SCORE!" Beavis shouted. Cassie, meanwhile, was having a moment of pondering. 'Alright, so I'll admit, their dads aren't around to help them around, but that still doesn't excuse the fact that they beat me up!'

Cassie shook her head as she headed off into the sunset. "Oh well, maybe next day won't be so shitty. I won't have to see their ugly mugs and I can go idiot-free."