Twenty Years Later- Bunbunmaru Spirit News archives
Bunbunmaru Spirit News introduces the Agony Aunt!
Hello, this is Byakuren Hijiri. We all know that every now and then, life doesn't quite go the way we want it to, and sometimes, one needs a person who they can talk to, without the fear that the knowledge of who they are will be used against them. That's why, after much urging of the head reporters of the newspaper, I have set up an Agony Aunt, where people can send their concerns about their life anonymously and I will do my best to help them with their worries, and calm their troubled minds.
I tried to make Myouren... er, Jean help with the responses too, but he said that if I should get an alternate Agony Aunt, I should make it a non-Buddhist, so ultimately, I am the only one able to do this. Please remember that I am but one person, and that no matter how much of a saviour others may consider me, I am still flawed, and may not give perfect advice. With that said, let's see what the first set of people sent!
Dear Agony Aunt,
I keep wanting to set fires, and no-one else wants to set fires as much as I do. They don't seem to like forest fires, even though they're a magnificent sight to behold. Obviously, there's nothing wrong with me, so... why doesn't the rest of the world like fire as much as me? What is this world coming to?
Agony Aunt: Um... well, humans have always had a fascination with fire. Word is that when humans first discovered fire, that is when they began to develop to what they are today. Fire is an important part of humanity's history, and of course, we wouldn't have cooked meat and all the delicious meals that go with it without fire.
That said... even if you are human, and not youkai, you may want to tone down your obsession a touch. Fire, when out of control, can kill people. You could even end up killing yourself if you're not careful, although, if you're who I think you are, that's probably no concern to you. But just think of other people. Some people are afraid of fire. It would be for the best if you just... change yourself rather than wishing for others to change.
Dear Agony Aunt,
A reporter keeps following me. You probably know which one. Anyway, she keeps calling me 'super cute' and looking at me through my window. I've dealt with obsessive... um... appreciators of my profession before, but I think she's obsessing with me on a personal level. Thankfully, one of my... co-workers keeps shooing her away, but it's kinda creepy.
Agony Aunt: Stalkers are, unfortunately, something that I have never had to deal with, although occasionally I get an overzealous follower of mine telling me that they're my biggest fan, but otherwise, I can't speak from personal experience about what to do.
If the reporter in question is not a dangerous woman, then you could always try to reason with her. Let her down gently that you do not like what she is doing, and perhaps she will leave you alone. Although, I know two reporters myself... she may be rather persistent if she's anything like the reporters I work with. In that case, I suggest doing something that I consider a last resort- engaging them in a danmaku battle, and if you win, she leaves you alone.
Just be sure that you win, because she may make you her lover by force if you lose. Although... no, she wouldn't do that, not Ha... um, I don't think your stalker is the sort to force you to be her girlfriend, but just be careful not to lose. Ideally, avoid violence altogether.
Dear Agony Aunt,
How does it feel to be treating inhuman monsters that eat humans as redeemable creatures, preaching your lies every day so that humans begin to trust these monsters and will eventually pay the price with their lives while you sit, meditating in your temple and telling their grieving families that the reason their beloved family member was eaten was because he didn't believe in the inherent goodness of youkai enough?
Agony Aunt: Ah, Miko. Care to discover a full stop at some point? You can submit a letter with more than one sentence, you know. Tell me, Miko, why did you ask me this, here? Is it to gain faith for your dying Taoist cult? All this does is make you look petty, and Seiga Kaku is doing a good enough job adding to that reputation as it is.
I agree with you that not all youkai are inherently good. Some youkai are evil, and kill humans and even other youkai without any regret whatsoever. I would even agree with you to the point of thinking that a select few of these youkai are unforgivable. However, some of these youkai with bad karma can change their ways, and I aim, not to convince humans that youkai are redeemable, but make formerly evil youkai change their ways and convince humans themselves that they are redeemable. I reform both humans and youkai, I do not discriminate, which is more than can be said for you.
In future, Miko, stay out of diplomacy. Talk of the results of your endeavours all you like, but I am the one who has the most friends in this fight.
Dear Agony Aunt,
My baby won't shut up. It cries. All the time. I hate it. I genuinely hate the thing I'm supposed to look after. I don't know what to do, I feel so evil for hating it, yet I can't bring myself to love it either. It's just... there, crying, all the time. I never sleep. I barely eat. I look a mess, and everyone pities me, forgetting who I am and what I can do...
Agony Aunt: I'm sorry to hear that. But remember, this crying baby will grow up, and this will pass. And if you bring yourself to love the child, then perhaps it'll grow up to be a good person, one with the selfless values that you will exercise in taking care of the child.
And if she does grow to be a good person, who knows, she may help you when you're too weak to survive for yourself. In humans, the cycle of care comes around in time. I presume you're human, at least.
Dear Agony Aunt,
My wife is... well, she's fantastic. Seriously, she's dutiful, loves me to pieces, is always happy to see me, and really wants to have children with me some day, but... well, I fear that I may not be able to have kids. I think there's something wrong with me. I love her, I really do, but I don't think I can give her the one thing she wants the most...
Agony Aunt: It is strange, isn't it? One person loathes a situation another person wants more than anything else in the world.
Do not worry, my friend. If you are unable to have children, look to your surroundings. Perhaps you have family that you do not know are family. Especially with the cycle of reincarnation being in full effect the world over, there could be reincarnated family members in places you never knew.
However, I also talk on a much more metaphorical level. Is there someone that both of you care for, and treat like a person you are raising? If there is, perhaps this person is the child you already have. Sometimes, the closest children are the ones not carried within one's womb.
My congregation are my children, for example. Nazrin, Ichirin, Murasa, Shou, even Nue, who is sort of like my rebellious teenage daughter, are my children. We share no blood, but we are family, whether they know it or not. I hope this helps you.
Dear Agony Aunt,
My big sister is starting to scare me. A friend of ours moved away from our house years ago, and she is really coming to miss her. She's reading a lot of books, just like her friend would, and has even taken her former personal servant as her own, and spends all her time in the mansion library.
However, she never wants to leave the house to visit the friend who moved away, she always waits for her to visit them, and when she does, she behaves as if she never truly misses her, and I think she's starting to become obsessed, not with the person herself, but the idea of that person. Please reply, I don't know what I can do to help her.
Agony Aunt: Your sister is probably just confused about what her feelings towards this friend of hers were and are. She might have never shown affection to her while she still lived with her, but noticed how much she enjoyed her company when she actually had to cope without her.
Yet, if she is the sort to never show affection openly in the first place, then she may also go into denial if she is ever asked about how much she likes the person, or if she is expected to act in an affectionate manner to the person when she visits.
I think your sister's behaviour is ordinary for an aloof friend that secretly cared for her friend, and you should simply let her go through her phase and come out the other side with minimal disturbance. Also... keep strong, you're doing much better than you ever were before. Even if the reader doesn't know who you are, I do, and I'm impressed with your progress.
That's all the letters I've received for the time being, and I hope that I've provided adequate answers to the people who wrote into this service. Also, remember, if you want a less anonymous, more personal form of counselling, I am always available at the Myouren Temple, and will share the burden of any weight your mind bears.
Article written by Byakuren Hijiri
Present-day Hindsight: Ha! Hatate was totally busted! I knew she was a crazy stalker girl! I know that gaining an insight into people's lives is part of reporting, but it's not like I follow people around or intrude on their personal lives. I mean, that's just unprofessional.