Garrus blinked, rubbing his eyes wearily with a hand. He drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly as he looked up, over to where Shepard stood. Her back was to him as she spoke to the medic, and he caught the way her shoulders just barely slumped as she spoke. The pair was too far away from him for Garrus to hear their words, but he could guess what the conversation was about. Almost repentantly, his eyes drifted over to where the black bags lay, spread out in neat rows on the street in front of the mortuary shuttle. Even from Garrus's position over by the merc base's entrance, he could still smell the death that surrounded the bodies.
He sighed again and shifted into a more comfortable position as he leaned back against the building's wall. That's all this place is, he thought as he closed his eyes. Death and body bags.
He was still standing there when, some minutes later, he heard the sound of raised voices. He opened his eyes and watched as the medic Shepard had been speaking to moved away, gesturing to his assistants. The other two humans began to pack up the bodies into the shuttle under his supervision. Shepard walked over to the dark bag closest to her, staring down at it for a moment before kneeling quietly beside it. Part of Garrus told him to look away, to give Shepard what little privacy he could. But there was another, smaller part of him that refused to, a part that was afraid that if he took his eyes off of her, even for a moment, he would look back only to find that she too had disappeared into one of those black bags.
The image sent a chill through him. He coughed, clearing his throat, and forced himself to turn away. He stared down at the ground, crossing his arms across his chest while he waited. A few minutes more passed and then Garrus heard the sound of footsteps approaching. He looked up and found Shepard's eyes as she headed his way. They seemed overly bright in the street's dim light.
"Ready to go?" she asked as she came up beside him, her voice as tired as the rest of her looked.
Garrus nodded and then hesitated. He glanced back towards the body bags, noticing that the one at the end was gone. "Commander…," he began, unsure of how to continue. "There's no rush." he finished lamely as he looked away from the empty space.
Shepard shook her head, looking away from both him and the shuttle. One of her hands was clenched into a fist as her side. "No, thank you though. But the sooner we get off this hellhole, the better. I've had enough of this place."
It was a sentiment he knew all too well. "Understood, Commander." he said quietly, hoping those two words were strong enough to hold all he wanted to say with them.
Some of it must have gotten across, because she looked back at him with eyes soft with gratitude. "Do you mind getting that up and running?" she asked as she tilted her head towards the transit cab Garrus had summoned earlier while she dealt with the medics. "I'm going to write up a quick message for Miranda, telling her we're on our way back finally. Probably should have done that earlier, but…" Shepard rubbed the back of her neck, sighing. "Well, better late than never I guess."
"Sure thing, Shepard." he said as he straightened up and headed towards the cab. Garrus paused just before he climbed into it, however, and gave one last glance towards the mortuary shuttle across the street. He nodded towards the unseen body he knew lay within it, and then he turned away and got into the cab.
Shepard arrived a moment later and climbed into the passenger seat. She nodded at him as she settled in, and Garrus pulled down on the steering wheel, lifting the shuttle up. Shepard looked out of her window, staring down at the ground below them as they rose higher into the air. One of her hands was still clenched tight beside her thigh, and Garrus waited for her to give him an order. A moment passed, then another, and then Shepard took in a deep breath. She faced forward as she exhaled, and Garrus hit the accelerator. The cab raced forward, leaving the empty building and the black bags far behind it.
They drove in silence. Garrus kept his attention on the traffic, weaving in and out of the other shuttles that surrounded them. Every now and then his gaze would wander over to the quiet woman next to him, but the glances told him little. There were times when he felt as if he should say something, anything, but what was there to say really? And who was he to say it? So the silence staggered on, and Garrus focused on driving.
Eventually, they arrived at the docking bay. Garrus lowered their cab down into one of the nearby parking slots, and Shepard climbed out after they touched ground. He followed after her, locking up the rental and paying for its lease via his omni-tool as he did so. By the time he was done, Shepard had already reached and started up their Kodiack, and she was beginning launch preparations as Garrus climbed in with her. His brow plates raised when his eyes landed on the large crate situated between the Kodiack's back benches.
"I'm guessing those are the parts?" he asked as he made his way to the front and settled into the passenger seat. It seemed like an eternity had passed since Shepard and him had first arrived searching for them.
"Good ol' Aria came through," Shepard sighed in answer as she secured clearance for take-off. "Let's just hope they're worth the cost. I get the feeling favors from her don't come cheap."
Garrus grunted in agreement. A moment or two passed and then the shuttle lurched beneath them as Shepard brought it airborne. His multitude of injuries twinged at the rough motion, and he shot her a side-long glance. "Any hope of me driving?" he asked half-heartedly.
A ghost of a smile appeared on her face. "Not a chance, Vakarian." she said as she pushed the throttle forward.
The Kodiack jerked forward. They flew towards the dark horizon, threading past ship after ship in quick succession until, finally, they breached Omega's border and left the space station behind. Garrus watched on a nearby monitor as it shrunk behind them, not regretful in the least to see it gone.
Silence settled around them again, undisturbed as they drifted quietly through space. Once they had left Omega's airspace completely, Shepard engaged the shuttle's auto-pilot and sank back into her seat with a barely contained sigh. She breathed in deep and Garrus watched out of the corner of his eyes as she closed her own, letting her head fall back against her seat. She looks exhausted, he thought to himself as he took in the lines etched across her face. He didn't blame her.
Garrus turned away and stared down at his hands, idly scratching his leg with one. He wondered again if he ought to say something or try and comfort her in some way. It was what she would do in his place, he knew. It seemed so easy for her, so natural to always be there with a quiet word or gentle touch. Just once, Garrus wanted to be able to do the same for her. He just didn't know how.
The silence stretched on.
He was still struggling over his own inability to breach it when Shepard spoke, sparring him the trouble. "I went back to Akuze." she said abruptly, her words quiet and toneless. Garrus glanced over at her, noticing that her eyes were open slightly, just enough for him to catch the occasional glint of green beneath her eyelids. "Just once, a few months after I'd returned to duty."
Garrus blinked, waiting. After a moment he asked, "What happened?"
"Nothing, really." Shepard answered in the same empty voice as before. "The thresher maws had already been cleared out by then, but the colony was still mostly abandoned. People were still scared, I guess, or maybe they just couldn't go back after what they'd seen. I don't know."
"But you did." Garrus said, watching her. "Went back, I mean."
"Yeah," she said, softly. "I did." She looked down at the hand she'd had clutched beside her. There was a dull glint of light against burnished metal as she opened her palm, showing Garrus the pair of dog tags she held for the first time. It was just light enough in the shuttle for him to see the word Toombs engraved on them, along with a service number and some other numbers. "It was so quiet then, you know? Almost kind of wrong, really," she continued, tracing the tags with her thumb. "It's like you get this image of a place in your mind, and for the longest time it's all you can see or think about. You remember all these things, things you wish you didn't, but you do. Every day and every night, you remember them, every single one. And you think maybe that's what hell is, being trapped in those memories. But then, when you actually go back to that place and find out that it's all gone. Everything looks different and nothing's the same, like the things you remember never even happened or like the world just moved on and forgot all about them….and it just feels wrong." She gripped her hand into a weak fist as her words faded into the silence.
Garrus blinked slowly, watching Shepard while he thought about what she had said. Her confession seemed to have changed something in her, or maybe it was Garrus who'd been changed. He wasn't really sure. This whole mission had shown him side of Shepard he'd never imagined, and now it was if he was finally seeing her for the first time. She was still the same woman he had always known– the same infamous Commander, an indominatible force of nature and sheer willpower – but now Garrus saw so much more. There was doubt beneath her confident grin, guilt burning in her eyes. And for some reason, Garrus found himself suddenly thinking about his old crew.
He also thought about how he'd never realized just how beautiful Shepard was.
A moment passed and she let out a shaky breath that struggled to pass its self-off as a laugh. "Sorry, none of that really made any sense, did it?" She blinked a few times as she ran a hand through her hair. "Must have banged my head harder than I thought earlier. Just ignore me and pretend–"
"Shepard," Garrus said, stopping her. Something important had just changed between them and, even if he didn't entirely understand it or what it meant, he had to acknowledge it somehow. If he didn't, he knew he might lose it forever, and that Garrus couldn't accept. "I…" he trailed off, tripping over the words in his mind. "I just…Well, you can tell me anything." She looked over at him, her eyes bright with more than he could understand just then. "Whatever it is, I'll listen." he finished softly.
She stared at him for a moment more, gripping the necklace in her hand. Garrus stared back.
"I never forgot them," she finally whispered as the guilt trickled from her eyes and down her face. "Never."
Garrus hesitated, and then he reached over and folded his hand over her own. "I know." he answered.
And then there was only silence and the warmth of her hand against his.
Miranda tapped her fingers against her desk, the motion sharp and quick.
She frowned when she realized she what she was doing and folded her hands together, controlling them as she rested her chin on top of them. Once again, she stared at the screen before her.
Miranda,
Sorry to keep you waiting, but I ran into someone on Omega and had to take care of a few things. We're on our way back now though, ETA under two hours.
- Shepard
P.S.
Can you have Chakwas prep the med bay? It's nothing too serious; mostly burns and scraps. And probably a fracture or two now that I think about it. Thanks.
Miranda narrowed her eyes.
Thirteen hours. The Commander had been off the grid for thirteen hours – for a mission that should have taken no more than six, by Miranda's own calculations – and this was the only explanation she'd provided. Less than one hundred words in total. Nothing else about Shepard's associate nor any details on the "things" she had somehow gotten herself involved in. Though I should hardly be surprised there, Miranda reflected, recalling how open-handed Shepard was with her time. As if they all had nothing better to do than single-handedly solve everyone else's problems.
And what was that last bit about about the med bay? Burns and fractures? If Miranda had been anyone else, she would have groaned.
"Operative Lawson," came a cool voice from the intercom above her.
"Yes, EDI?" she asked, glancing upwards.
"You requested notification concerning Commander Shepard and Officer Vakarian's return. They are docking the Kodiack in the hanger bay as we speak."
"Thank you, EDI." she said, standing up. "Please inform the Commander I will meet her outside this floor's elevator. And tell Engineer Donnelly to retrieve the parts and begin repairs immediately."
"Yes, Miss Lawson."
Miranda paused for a moment, taking in a measured breath. It would serve no one if she let her temper get the better of her. Even if the Commander seemed determined to do everything in her power to provoke it.
Satisfied that she was in complete control of herself, Miranda left her office. She made her way past the dining hall and over to the elevator, positioning herself just before the doors. She waited.
The shaft opened a minute later and, much to her chagrin, Miranda found herself more than a little shocked by what greeted her. The Commander and the turian sagged before her, the withered pair standing slightly closer than normal, as if each was preparing to catch and support the other if need be. Their faces were drawn and exhausted, though Vakarian seemed to be the worse off. His armor was blackened and cracked, with several chunks missing altogether in some places. Dried blood and medi-patches flaked off even as Miranda watched, and there was a hideous looking wound in his right side. Shepard hardly looked better – more than half of her face was mottled by savage looking bruises. One of her eyes was so swollen and blistered it might as well have been useless for all the good it seemed to do her. Her right arm also seemed damaged, slumping slightly by her side as if she was trying to avoid using it as much as possible.
"Shepard," Miranda said, trying to keep the surprise out of her voice. "What the hell happened down there?"
The Commander looked up at her. Their eyes met, and Miranda almost recoiled from the look that darkened Shepard's face. Shepard glared, her eyes narrowed with intensity and…something else as she stared at Miranda. But then, just as abruptly as it had appeared, the look was gone, replaced instead with a weary grin. "Oh, the usual. Routine shopping and near-death experiences. Just another typical Tuesday really."
"Just another…?" Miranda repeated, glancing between the two in front of her. As usual, Vakarian's face betrayed nothing, and all she could see on Shepard's was exhaustion. Had she imagined the whole thing? "Commander, this is hardly the time for jokes. Cerberus invested an extraordinary amount in you and –"
Again, Shepard's eyes flashed. No, Miranda definitely hadn't imagined it then. But the Commander's tone was normal when she said, "And they want to see a return on their "investment", right? I'm well aware of my responsibilities, Miranda." She sighed then, running a hand through her tattered hair. Vakarian's mandibles flicked in response.
"Commander, we really should get you looked at," he murmured, watching her.
She smirked. "Because you're in such a fantastic condition yourself, eh Garrus?" The turian's eyes narrowed in amusement, and Shepard turned back to Miranda, her expression not unkind when she said, "I'm sorry for making you worry, Miranda, honest. I should have kept you better informed. Just let me drop this lug off over at Chakwa's and I'll debrief you first thing, alright?"
"Of course, Commander." Miranda replied, keeping her composure carefully controlled. She moved out of their way, surreptitiously studying the pair as they hobbled their way towards the med bay. They said nothing to one another, yet they remained close while they walked, almost touching. Something seemed different about them, but Miranda couldn't put a name to it. Not just yet, in any case. She thought back to the hostility she'd seen on Shepard's face when Miranda had mentioned Cerberus.
What the hell had happened on Omega? Miranda wondered, bewildered.
A/N: And here it is! This took way longer than I'd wanted, but at least I finished before the month was out like I wanted. I think I mentioned this before, but I'd originally planned for this chapter to be the last one. But, because you guys have just been so freaking amazing and supportive and have stuck through so much of my crap and late updates, there's going to be one more bonus epilogue chapter. It's my way of telling you all how much I appreciate all you fantastic, beautiful people, and I really hope you guys will enjoy it~ It should be up in three weeks or less, so see you all then!