~Butters' P.O.V~

"Phillip, what exactly your relationship with your fairy?"

"Does it matter?"

"Well I think so, since your watch seems to have a threat inside it."

"What?" Phillip turns around and takes the watch from me, reading it's contents. It results in his face turning an extremely pale color. He looks so down, there might as well be a little cloud raining over his head. I almost feel sorry for him. Almost.

"What did you do? Did you do something to upset him? It is a him, right?" I decide to shut up when Phillip's head snaps to look at me with the most irritated expression possible.

"Yes, it is a him… and yes, I apparently did do something to upset him."

"And what's that?"

"I don't know, I don't want to know, and most of all, I don't want to talk about it." Phillip replies, lying down again. I sigh at his attitude, giving up. He might as well go to hell, because I'm sick of trying to understand him.

"Fine then, drown in your sorrows. I'm going to bed." Phillip doesn't answer, but I know he's angry. No matter, he deserves it for being so bitter about everything. "You can blame all the people you want for your unhappiness, but really, from what I've seen, it's nothing but yours." I kick my shoes off and climb into bed, not even bothering to get undressed. I take out my watch, stare at it for a few seconds, and leave my watch on my bedside table.

"Is that so?" Phillip says after a while, responding to my earlier comment.

"Yes, it is." Phillip suddenly shoots out of bed and storms up to me, looking absolutely furious.

"I'll… I'll tell you what brings me unhappiness! And it'll bring you unhappiness too! It's this thing!" He pulls out his watch. "And this!" He snatches my watch as well before I'm able to stop him. "If these things didn't exist, then we wouldn't…" Phillip clenches his teeth and gets ready to smash both of them on the floor.

"NO!" I tackle him before he can do any harm, and before he wakes up our 'parents'. I won't let him do something that only I am allowed to do. Only I am allowed to decide what happens with Kenneth and I. Phillip doesn't seem to see it that way. He claws at me, trying to push me off so he can get to the watches (that I've managed to snatch away and tossed across the room).

"Phillip! Phillip, stop it! Calm down, or else you'll do something you'll regret!" I gather up all my strength and push him away. He crashes over the desk and into the wall. He emerges from behind the desk, just when I'm starting to feel guilty for pushing him so hard.

"I'll regret nothing! If I can sever my bond with that fairy, and sever yours as well, then by God, I will do it!"

This is the first time I've lost my temper so quickly. I run up to Phillip and slap him, trying to get some sense into that large head of his. "Have some sense! Are you not an Englishman? Grow up and live with what you have. Instead of trying to erase it, buck up like a man and go forward. Or are you just a stupid child that doesn't know any better?" Phillip stares at me for a long time, but eventually gets up and goes back to bed, much to my relief. That person is best when he isn't acting like a total lunatic.

~Kenny's P.O.V~

"Hey Kenny. How's your day been?" As expected, Craig's the first one to speak to me when I get to the center of the negative side of the woods. I'm afraid that I'm way to miserable to even show my face in the positive side of the forest.

"Swell. Fantastic." I flop down next to him, glaring at nothing.

"Aw, what's wrong, my dear friend?"

"Craig, shut up. I'm not in the mood." Craig smirks and punches my shoulder playfully.

"Come on, Kenneth. Don't be like that." I look at him, irritated. He has it so easy.

"Well, that's easy for you to say. Your human loves you, doesn't he?"

"More or less. Doesn't Leopold like you at all? He seemed to when I met him."

"Well he doesn't." Craig sighs, rolling his eyes.

"Kenny, for God's sake, I've known you since we were human. I know you've never given even one thought to being with a male. Why are you so upset about this?"

"Craig, don't be a fool. You saw it yourself. Leopold and I are romantic types. How would you feel if Tweek hated you?"

"Um… heartbroken."

"I rest my case." After studying me for a while, Craig puts his hand firmly on my shoulder.

"You'll get through this. Leopold just needs some convincing, that's all!"

"Mmm, I suppose you're right, Craig. I'll just need to be patient. It'll all work out. And since when are you so nice?"

"I'm always nice."

"You know, if this was a musical kid's movie, then you and everyone around you would break into a dance and take turns singing about how you can succeed with your little problem." Craig and I both turn to see Ruby. I hate it when she appears out of nowhere like this.

"What are you doing here, Ruby? You're meant to be on the other side of the forest."

"I could say the same for you." I give her a dirty look, which she returns immediately. What a pleasant little girl.

"I'm here 'cause…" – "What do you want…?"

We both pause.

"I wanna speak…" – "I'm first to speak…"

Craig shakes his head at us pitifully.

"SHUT UP! I'M SPEAKING FIRST!" – "SHUT UP! I'M SPEAKING FIRST!"

Ruby and I look at each other, and after a few seconds, know what to do.

"ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS!" – "ROCK, PAPER, SCISSORS!"

Ruby unfortunately beats me with her scissors.

"HA! I GET TO SPEAK FIRST! I KNEW TEACHING YOU THAT GAME WOULD COME IN HANDY!"

"JUST TELL ME WHAT YOU CAME FOR!" Ruby grins cheekily and pulls a small pack of something out of nowhere.

"Remember you were asking about cigarettes? I managed to get you some." I remember asking her about those things.

"Aren't you supposed to be an adult for those? How did you get them?"

"Let's just say nothing was legal. Anyway, you wanted some, so here you go."

"I was joking about them, Ruby…" I really was.

"You were…?" Ruby looks devastated for a second, but then suddenly pops to life again. "Oh well! I bought them either way, so give them a shot!"

"Gee Ruby, I'd love to, but… but I'm too young." From what Ruby has told me, these things are very bad for you, and aren't very pleasant to smoke either. As if I would want one.

"Nonsense! Including your human years, you're two hundred and eighteen years old!"

"B-But-

"Here you go!" She opens the pack and gives me a so-called 'cigarette'. I stare at it nervously.

"I'll do it too, just for the fun of it." Craig says, quickly snatching one from the pack before Ruby can stop him. She growls at him, but Craig ignores her, as if she doesn't exist.

…

"So how do you start these things?" I ask, trying to see if there's anything to press on it.

"You light them, dipshit." I stick my tongue out at Ruby and hold my hand out. She reluctantly gives me something she calls a 'lighter'. After struggling to figure out how to work it, I manage to light the cigarette, as well as Craig's. Ruby gets one out and lights it as well.

"Ok, on three, we all take a drag." Ruby says.

"What's that?" I ask.

"You suck on it and inhale the smoke, stupid!" I decide to ignore the 'stupid' part. "Alright. One, two, three!" The three of us take a very large drag from our cigarettes. This is the order of when we started to cough: Me, Craig, Ruby.

"Jesus *cough* Christ…" Craig comments, throwing his on the ground and stomping on it. "How *cough* do people *cough* fucking do this?" I drop my cigarette and lean back against a tree, struggling to breathe.

"I don't know, Craig. *cough* But I *cough* don't see why *cough* you felt the need to *cough* curse over this…"

Ruby looks at me in disbelief, wheezing. "I *cough* sure as hell *cough* do." After a while of huffing and staring at her cigarette, she says dumbly: "Maybe *cough* it isn't so bad the second time."

…And she takes another drag from her cigarette. Craig and I watch open mouthed as she starts to have an even worse coughing fit.

"OH MY GOD! OH *cough* MY GOD! IT'S *cough* WORSE! IT'S WAY *cough* FRIGGIN WORSE!"

"You're so *cough* stupid sometimes *cough* Ruby!" We all continue coughing until a huge explosion blows us over, knocking the wind out of us. It seems that a very angry fairy has arrived. I shake my head and stand up, pulling a dazed Ruby along with me.

"OUCH! DAMMIT *cough* ALL!" I look at Craig, who's unfortunately bent his wing.

"Craig *cough*, don't yell so loudly *cough* in the middle of the night." He glares at me, then starts to bend the corner of his wing back into place. Ouch.

"What was *cough* that explosion?" Ruby asks me weakly, taking another drag of her cigarette.

"Ruby, give me that! Are you *cough* stupid? It'll just make you cough more!"

"I just *cough* wanted to finish *cough* it…"

"Well you won't!" I throw it and the ground and stomp on it like Craig did earlier. "All *cough* gone! Vamoose!"

"Hello *cough* Damien. How you been? Find your *cough* human?" I take my concentration off Ruby and see Damien standing in front of Craig, looking the angriest I've ever seen him. Ruby falls to the ground clumsily. I suppose this is why smoking is considered bad.

"What the fuck have you fools been up to?" I open my mouth to answer, but Ruby beats me to it.

"*cough* smokin' *cough*!" She says, before collapsing completely. I facepalm at her.

"…I'm surrounded by absolute retards." Damien remarks, glaring at all of us.

"So *cough* Damien, was it you who caused that lovely explosion that *cough* made us all fall over and *cough* made me bend my wing!? WHICH, I MIGHT ADD IS VERY *cough* PAINFUL!"

"Grow up. It's not that bad. And how did you get those things?" Damien points to the pack of cigarettes. I shakily point to Ruby, still coughing. Damien bends down and takes one, studying it carefully.

"Give me a match or whatever you used to light this thing." He commands Ruby, who's still collapsed on the ground. She shakily takes the lighter out and tosses it on the ground in front of him. After struggling like I did, Damien lights the cigarette. Just as Damien brings it to his lips, Craig decides to voice our thoughts.

"Damien, I don't… *cough* I don't think that's such a good idea." Damien ignores him and takes a large drag just as we did. He starts to cough rapidly, though in a much calmer way than we did. Ruby finally pushes herself up, and starts to walk away, clearly unbalanced. She looks like a drunk person.

"Where are you *cough* going, Ruby?"

"Where do you *cough* think? To buy a bottle of water!"

"Ruby! There's a *cough* well nearby!"

"Fuck the well! I need real water! I'm off *cough* to the 1990s!" I helplessly watch Ruby stagger away, still coughing. I look back at Damien and Craig, to find them still coughing their heads off.

"So, *cough* Damien, what pissed you off today?" I ask falling to the ground next to them. I can't believe smoking is this bad for our young bodies.

"You know how I wanted to die?"

"Uh *cough* huh."

"Well, my little shit of a *cough* human managed to touch me before the week was up. The little…"

"Alright *cough*, that's it. Sorry *cough* but I really need to go and-

Craig covers his mouth and runs away, no doubt to go vomit, stumbling many times. Wonderful, Damien and I are alone… we don't like each other very much.

"So who's your *cough* human?" I ask, actually curious to know. I take a few deep breaths, which makes me feel much better.

"I don't know. All I *cough* know is that he's been stalking me ever since I came here." Out of nowhere, Ruby crashes onto the ground next to me. She looks beyond angry.

"Did you have fun going all the way to a shop in the 1990s for a lousy bottle of water?" I ask her, smirking.

"SHADDUP KENNY! I WAS SO HUMILIATED TO WALK WITH THESE CLOTHES INTO A STORE THERE! EVERYONE STARED AT ME!"

"It was your choice to go there." Ruby sticks her tongue out and offers the half-full bottle to me. "No thank you. My cough has seemed to fade away. Anyway, back to the topic. Don't you even know the name of your human?"

Damien coughs for the hundredth time. "No."

"Didn't you read the name when you got his picture?"

"Now that I think about *cough* it… I think it was 'Phillip' something…" Ruby noticeably stiffens and look at Damien directly for the first time.

"Phillip Pirrup?"

"I think it was that. Wow, I think my cough's gone. Finally."

"Hehe… isn't this such a coincidence. Your humans are step brothers." Ruby laughs at the irony. Damien and I, not so much. I think back to when I saw that blond boy arguing with Leopold over cursing.

"Are you joking? That boy… oh my God!" This is horrible. This means Damien has an excuse to be near my human. Damien is the absolute last fairy I would want anywhere close to Leopold.

"Listen Damien, and listen good," I hiss. "If you do anything to my human, I'll-

"Calm down, lover boy. I don't intend to ever see my human again if I can help it. All I care about if figuring out a way to die." Ruby looks at him, all giggly.

"Oh, Damien, you can be so silly! If Phillip dies, you die, it's as simple as that… oops." Ruby covers her mouth, eyes wide. I look back and forth between her and Damien, eyes narrowed. Damien looks shocked for a few seconds, but then smiles evilly, and gets up.

"Thank you for such a thoughtful suggestion, girl. I'll be sure to do it." He starts to walk away, but I stop him.

"Is it really necessary to kill him? Won't it hurt you?" Damien turns around and looks at me, clearly not understanding what I mean. "I mean, wouldn't it hurt you greatly if you killed your human? You two have bonded after all."

"I'm not like you, Kenneth. I don't have such pathetic feelings for something like a human. That thing means nothing, absolutely nothing to me. Now if you excuse me, I'm off to buy a knife." I wave goodbye to him sarcastically.

"Bye, you heartless son of a… person." I mutter, rolling my eyes. I see Ruby looking at me out of the corner of my eye. She looks guilty.

"I promised Phillip I would keep an eye out for him, and yet… man, this sucks."

"Ruby, I've told you a million times not to speak like that. No one understands you."

"Well excuse me for having a job that requires me to speak like that about half the time!"

"Watch your mouth, miss. I'm sick of the way you've been speaking to me today. Have you forgotten who you're talking to? And aren't you even concerned about where your brother is?" Ruby looks surprised at the change of topic, but then frowns and looks away.

"Nope."

"You're doing it again! Speak normally. And you know what Ruby? Like it or not, you're going to have to speak to Craig sooner or later."

"I'll do no such thing."

"Oh yes you will. I'll see to that."

"Say, you know how Damien just went off to kill his human?"

"…Yes?"

"And you know how that human is living with your human?"

"…Yes?"

"And you know how Damien is going to come to your human's house to-

"Oh… SHIT!" I curse for the first time ever, bolt up off the ground, and fly away.

"Bye-bye, Kenny!" Ruby shouts after me sweetly.

~Butters' P.O.V~

I wake up to someone shaking my shoulder. "Leopold… Leopold, wake up. Quickly!" I sigh and nudge to person off, since I can see the sun hasn't even fully risen yet. "Leopold, if you don't get up soon, I'll have to throw a bucket of water on you…" Who is this even? I open my eyes, trying to see who the person is. I jump when I realize it's Kenneth, not Phillip, who I would have expected.

"Jesus, I didn't expect you here." Kenneth ignores my remark and pulls me out of bed. I'm still basically half asleep, so I can't really understand what's going on. I look down at myself as Kenneth rummages in my wardrobe.

"Heh, I slept in my clothes…" I say to myself sleepily, a sheepish smile on my face.

"Yes, you did…" Kenneth says, fumbling with my jacket, trying to get it off. I frown at him, rubbing my eyes to wake myself up. It isn't working.

"What are you doing?"

"We need to get out of this place now, and I won't have you going out in crinkled clothes like that. People will tease you." Kenneth answers, pulling a clean jacket on me. I notice him tying a ribbon around my collar.

"I usually wear ties, not ribbons…"

"Well you're wearing a ribbon today, Leopold. End of discussion." I pout childishly, glaring at the wall as he finishes tying the ribbon. Why is it so urgent for me to leave? Does Kenneth care about me going to school that much? No, that can't be… he seemed to be fine with taking me out of it yesterday.

"Leopold! Wake up!" Kenneth snaps his fingers in front of my eyes a couple of times. "Come on, put your shoes on." I lazily find my shoes on the floor and put them on. After glancing between me and the window frantically for only about two seconds, Kenneth loses his patience and ties the laces himself.

"Alright, come on." Kenneth tries to pull me out of the window, but I don't budge.

"It's raining outside, and I don't have a coat on." I tell him, pointing outside.

"Well where is it?"

"By the back door…"

"Come on then!" Kenneth grabs my arms and drags me downstairs. I suddenly remember that to get to the back door I have to pass through the kitchen, and the people who are in there right now are…

"LEOPOLD! IS THAT YOU? WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN, YOU AWFUL CHILD!?" … My 'parents'. I glance nervously at Kenneth, but he's in complete fairy form, thank God. If they saw a boy like Kenneth coming from upstairs with me… there would be misunderstandings.

"I… I was-

"DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH YOU WORRIED US? NOT TO MENTION YOU JUST WALKED OUT OF CLASS LIKE IT WAS NOTHING! THE TEACHER HAD HALF A MIND TO EXPEL YOU!" I raise an eyebrow. My 'mother' may have seemed kind at first, but as I expected, she's just as mean as my real mother was.

"I'm sorry, I won't do it again. And as for last night…" Damn. I can't lie. "I was kidnapped." Kenneth glowers at me. At least it's not a lie, since he dragged me around the forest all day.

"Kidnapped? By whom?"

"A blond boy about my age. I think he lives in the woods somewhere. He wanted to speak to me, but I didn't want to go with him, so he dragged me away into the woods." Again, this isn't a total lie.

"A boy? Leopold, your father and I won't tolerate these lies."

"I'm not lying. Forgive me, mother, but I'm going to be late for school. I need to go. I'll accept whatever punishment you have when I come home." With that, I run to the back door, grab my coat, and bolt outside. Kenneth follows close behind. Once we're outside and I've closed the door, Kenneth grabs my coat and puts it on for me.

"I think I'm old enough to do that in my own, Kenneth."

"Is this how you always act when someone takes care of you?"

"On the contrary, no one has ever taken care of me, and I fully intend to keep it that way." I storm away from Kenneth, glaring at the rainy, wet path ahead of me. Damn this weather.

"Leopold, don't walk away from me like that. It's dangerous."

"How is that dangerous? And why did you so urgently want me to come outside? I know you don't care about school any more than I do."

"Look, Leopold, Phillip's fairy is extremely dangerous, and is out to get Phillip. He wants to kill him, understand? And as your fairy, I don't want you to be anywhere near him. That's why, until Phillip is dead, I'm not leaving your side."

"Are you serious? There's no way that Phillip's fairy would-

"You're wrong, Leopold. Phillip's fairy is evil, and is a 'Death' fairy, understand? I won't risk you being near him."

"How will he even know where Phillip is?"

"He'll see the chains."

"What chain?" Kenneth stares at me open mouthed.

"You haven't noticed them?"

"What?" Kenneth grabs my shoulder and stops me from walking.

"Leopold, look closely at your feet." I do as he says, but see nothing. "Really, really closely, Leopold." I try even harder, and eventually I manage to make out a light blue chain shackled to my right ankle. It leads to Kenneth's left ankle. I also notice that there is a red one around my left wrist, and it leads to Kenneth's right wrist. Even our watches are linked together with a white chain. I try to touch the red one on my wrist, but my hand goes through it.

"You can't feel them, Leopold. You can only see them. They get longer the further you go away from me."

"I don't understand… what is the point of such things?"

"It's all about symbolism."

"Symbolism?"

"Yes. Every fairy and their human have chains similar, if not identical to ours attached to them. Their watches differ in color though. The red chain around our wrists is supposed to symbolise love, since we're a romantic type of pair. The chain around our ankles is supposed to symbolise loyalty, since we'll always have to be together. And the white chain of our watches is supposed to symbolise light, purity, and innocence. I suppose it's because I'm a very religious fairy."

"So much for that. I'm not a very 'light' person."

"You will be someday, Leopold." I laugh.

"You keep telling yourself that." An awkward silence forms as we start walking again.

"…So how did you manage to get to me and Phillip before his fairy did?"

"He had to go and buy a knife in the village."

"But you said he's a 'Death' fairy."

"He is."

"Then why go through the trouble to buy a knife?"

"It's… it's complicated, Leopold."

"Then explain to me. You seem bright enough to do it."

"Damien's job isn't to cause the person's death; his job is to complete the person's death. It isn't his job to push someone off a cliff. His job is to let the person truly die. A person's death comes in this order: cause of death, 'Death' fairy's permission to die, grim reaper taking the soul away."

"So you're saying that…if I'm shot in the head, which is the cause of death, Damien would come and magically allow me to die, and then a grim reaper would come and take my soul away?"

"Yes, but you're not going to be shot in the head."

"I could."

"You couldn't."

"Could."

"Couldn't."

"COULD!"

"COULDN'T!"

"COULD!"

"COULDN'T!"

"COULDN'T!"

"COULD! Oh wait… DAMMIT LEOPOLD, DON'T CONFUSE ME LIKE THIS!"

~Damien's P.O.V~

"So young man, what do you plan to do with that lovely dagger?" The shopkeeper asks me as I study my new knife.

"Is it any of your business?" I snap at him.

"No, but to be honest, I'm not supposed to sell those to boys as young as you…"

"Well then you've made a grave mistake, sir. Good day." I hastily leave the shop. I don't want a mob of people coming after me and calling me a murderer. I wouldn't be able to show my face around here again. And that would prevent me from buying that heavenly food they call chocolate.

I follow all the ridiculous chains that connect that stalker and I together, right to his house. I suppose the black chain suits me, since I'm evil and deathly. Good job choosing the colors, God. I peek inside the upstairs window, where I would assume the child sleeps. I assumed right. And to be even more joyous, he's even still there, sleeping in his bed. This is going to be so much easier than I thought.

I leap inside the room, flinching as I make the floorboards creak loudly. If I'm seen by the people that I can hear clearly downstairs, it'll be hard to explain. I can't just leave, because the whole village would most likely come looking for me, and then I won't be able to by my chocolate anymore… I'm meant to be killing someone right now.

"Che… get ready to die, human." I say, approaching the bed. This child must be an extremely heavy sleeper if he didn't wake up to that squeak of the floor board. I see he's facing the wall and frown. I'd rather not touch him, but here goes. I roughly grab his shoulder and turn him around to face me. I growl when I see his fringe is covering his eyes.

"I refuse to kill a person that I cannot even see the eyes of…" I use the knife to flick the hair out of his eyes. I waver when I see his sleeping face. He looks so young, so innocent, and as much as I hate this word, so perfect. I lean closer, trying to see him more closely. I suddenly realize what I'm doing and back away, feeling ashamed.

"Don't be such a fool, Damien." I tell myself. "Don't let a boy like this stop you from doing what you want…" I raise the knife up and bring it down to his chest. But before I'm able to let the dagger make contact with his skin, my left hand automatically shoots out and grabs my right arm, stopping it from moving. After struggling with myself furiously, I drop the weapon and let it clatter onto the floor. I stare at it lying between my feet, astonished. I rub my right hand with my left, staring at the boy who is still fast asleep. As much as I fucking hate it, I know that no matter how hard I try, I won't be able to kill this boy, at least not directly like this.

Damn it all… that knife was so expensive.