Death Battle! Done Right

by Sai Kunai Blade

These two have had this coming for a while. They have killed many of our favorite childhood icons and symbols of innocence and now it's their turn. Death Battle! Wiz vs. Boomstick. This is to cheer up my friend and co-host of our future Death Battle series, Maikou and to demonstrate how the story should be written. Anyway, one will live, one will die, who will it be?

2. Boomstick

[The Death Battle Door opens to reveal Boomstick]

Sai: Boom stick is the drunken, redneck co-host of Death Battle. Just you're average, everyday, overly-violent redneck… WITH A FRIGGIN' SHOTGUN FOR A LEG!

Maikou: Indeed, Boomstick usually does the work on the characters offensive abilities and most of the time, although he DOES share this with Wizard, weapons.

Sai: He basically tells you about the ways the characters have to hurt people.

Maikou: Considering he apparently either lives in the wilderness or out in the boonies where he must fend for himself, he has significant survival and hunting abilities and probably a decent amount of combat abilities.

Sai: At least more-so than his number-crunching counterpart

Background:

Co-host and violence analyzer for Death Battle

Extreme survival skills

Probably has good combat skills

He is actively more than willing to hurt people and considering he has 2 double-barreled shotguns, certainly has the means to do so.

Maikou: That's right, Sai, although it can only fire 2 rounds before needing to reload, people can usually carry about 40 to 60 shells for it and when it's empty, as Boomstick probably would, it can be used as a club

Sai: In addition, it only takes a total of 6 seconds to reload, depending of course on your coordination and whether or not you're a complete clutz.

Maikou: The recoil damage is relatively low, but so is its penetration power.

Sai: But that doesn't matter when you're close enough to blow off limbs like in Robocop. That was some hardcore punishment.

Maikou: True. And it also doesn't matter if your opponent isn't armored.

Sai: And if that's the case, any part of you that gets shot is getting a hole blown into it or blown off.

Double barrel shotgun:

Magazine size: 2 rounds

Maximum ammunition: 40-60 rounds

Reload time: 2.65 per shell

Rate of fire: 212 rpm

Range: 12.5-15 meters

Recoil: medium

Penetration: small

Semi-automatic (Break action)

Sai: I think Wiz is kinda screwed here.

Maikou: Maybe, but Boomstick is far from being any ultimate fighter. He is usually drunk, or getting himself there, is much less clever than his strategic counterpart and, while we're still on the topic of strategy, he employs absolutely NONE, just like his hero Doomguy.

Sai: And, while it's pretty badass, having a shotgun for a leg probably makes things a little more difficult.

Weaknesses:

Seems to be drunk most of the time

Horrible strategist

Not as smart as wizard

Shotgun leg makes basic mobility harder

Maikou: But still, out of the two of them, Boomstick HAS to be the deadliest.

Sai: So, who gives a shit? Just let him kill people!

"It's time for a Death BATLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEE!"

[The Death Battle Doors Close]