Garrus wasn't particularly sure why he kept coming back to Shepard's cabin. The constant feeling of emptiness seemed to swallow him whole, draining any positive feelings he had. They had yet to hear from Wrex on his expedition, but he tried to remain hopeful that it would end well. He supposed he should grieve, allow himself to succumb to the feelings of loss and worry. Turians weren't really criers, though. And Tali and Liara seemed to do enough of that on their own.

Tali hid in the lower decks of the Normandy, in the stairwell near the engineering room. Liara used the privacy of her office. It wasn't hard to tell, from Liara's eyes and Tali's voice, what they were doing. Garrus and Liara had decided that telling the crew about Wrex's plan would be more damaging than helpful for the time being. The first test flight of the Normandy would take place in the morning, so all of the crew needed to have all of their attention on the task. Of course, that didn't stop Liara from worrying. She was fighting the tears in her eyes even as Garrus excused himself from her office.

He ran a gloved finger over Shepard's desk, eying the console and datapads that littered most of it. Shepard was never one to worry about cleanliness when she was doing her research. To anyone else, it looked like a chaotic mess … to her, she could find what she was looking for instantly by shuffling a few pads to the side. Liara was practically driven crazy by the condition of the commander's desk.

After a moment, he decided to sit down on one of the couches, a short distance from the bed they had shared on more than one occasion. Before going through the Omega 4 relay, though, he rarely came up to Shepard's cabin. The one time he came close was after Horizon. Garrus shut his eyes, shaking his head at the memory …

He had been worried he was going to disturb her. More often than not, Shepard visited him in the main battery when she wanted to talk, and he was all right with that. Actually, every once in a while, he made excuses not to talk, like wanting to focus on his calibrations. It wasn't that he didn't want to talk to Shepard. On the contrary, Shepard was one of the only beings in existence he trusted completely. But telling her everything that happened, the blur of two years that went by without her, all of the loss he suffered because his own idiotic mistakes … all of that was too much for now. Maybe someday, he could tell her more than the quick version, but, for now, he kept that to himself.

Horizon brought up some heavy stuff for her. The two of them never got too deep into emotions. Shepard often made the joke that she liked not having to feel around him. It was apparent their trust was mutual, there was rarely a time she went out on a mission without him, but both of them had their own secrets. Things to hide from by pretending they didn't exist. Jokes, friendly shooting competitions, arguing over weapon usage, laughing at inappropriate moments while the other squad mates looked at them like they were crazy … It was common practice for the human and turian partners on the field.

Seeing Kaidan Alenko seemed to throw Shepard off. His reaction to her made Garrus angry, though he kept it in check. No matter what they were doing, who they were working for, he was supposed to be Shepard's friend. Tali even mentioned that he had feelings for Shepard once, though the commander gently turned him down. Humans were strange creatures, without a doubt, but he knew responding as if she were the enemy was no way to react in a reunion.

Kaidan's words seemed to physically strike her at times. A ghost … You work for the enemy … You've changed … Every word made her flinch or lean away, as if it hurt her. She had already lost several members of a human colony, now one of her old friends thought of her as a traitor … Once he, Kasumi, and Shepard boarded the shuttle, she plopped down on a seat, putting her head in her hands. Garrus put a hesitant hand on her shoulder. She looked up and forced a small smile, her sign that she was okay, and didn't want to talk about it. He knew both of those indications weren't true.

It took some time for the turian to decide to come up and visit her. Shepard disappeared almost as soon as the shuttle landed, stripping her gear and going to speak to the Illusive Man. He was attempting to focus on some calibrations before caving to his worry, asking EDI where the commander was. Riding the elevator up to her cabin, he felt strangely uncomfortable and maybe even a little nervous. Garrus hated civilian clothes, he hardly ever wore them unless he was forced to, but he decided to change out of his armor before going to see her.

He was about to knock on her door when he heard two different voices. Plus side of turian hearing, he could make out words through metal walls without much hassle.

"So that Kaidan guy was a friend of yours?" Kasumi's smooth voice asked, her tone always sounding on the edge of laughter.

"Was being the appropriate word, apparently," Shepard sighed. She sounded so worn out. "He was with the first Normandy when I was in the Alliance. We went after Saren."

"He didn't seem thrilled to see you or Garrus."

"I suppose you could expect that from someone who thought were dead … And now working with a group you've been hell-bent on stopping."

Kasumi gave a breathy laugh. "Hey, situations change. If there's anyone who knows what that's like, it's a thief. You have to be willing to improvise."

"Improvise …"

The two were quiet for a moment. Garrus caught the soft sound of ice clinking in a glass. He assumed the two were drinking something. Silently, he readjusted himself, leaning against the wall beside the door. Just in case someone decided to walk out unexpectedly.

"You seem kinda down, Shep," Kasumi offered.

Shepard huffed a puff of air, her attempt at a laugh. "That noticeable, huh?"

"Well, maybe not to everyone else, but I spend a lot of time watching people. Sometimes for work, most of the time for fun. So what's up?"

There was a short pause, and he heard Shepard's air escape her in a heavy sigh. "Have you ever felt like everyone is watching you?"

Kasumi laughed again. "I'm a thief, Shepard. It's my job not to be seen. Though I can't tell you how many times I've been watched. I think it's the outfit."

A genuine laugh came from the commander. "Maybe." Yet another pause, as if she was gathering her thoughts, then she continued. "I mean, for so long, I was amazing at not gathering attention. I did what was expected of me, I worked hard to get where I was … Then the Blitz happened, then I became a Spectre, then everything developed with Saren, and now there's the Collectors … Now, it seems like everyone is watching me. The Alliance, the Council, sometimes it feels like the whole damn galaxy. And it feels like, no matter how someone looks at me, or how hard I try, I'll never be what they expect."

"Don't tell me the amazing Commander Shepard has doubts about herself?"

She scoffed. "I have doubts every second of every day, Kasumi. Apparently, I'm just really good at faking it. And ever since Miranda and Cerberus brought me back, it just seems to be getting worse."

"What do you mean?"

"All of my old crew, even some of the new … They all look at me like I'm … I don't know, inhuman. They're afraid to make eye contact sometimes. Hell, you're one of the first who came to talk to me, not the other way around."

"You can't really blame your old crew, can you? I mean, all of them basically saw you die, right?"

"I know that. But … I'm here. I'm me. Tali seemed terrified of me, Kaidan was practically disgusted …"

"What about Garrus?"

The turian instinctively pressed himself tighter against the wall, as if that would help him hear better. Shepard paused again, and he wondered if that was a bad thing.

"Garrus," she said after another breath, "looked at me like I was the person who could save his ass." He could hear the humor in her voice.

"Exactly!" Kasumi said enthusiastically. "He was happy to see you."

"He was then … I'm not so sure now. More often than not, I feel like I'm bothering him when I go down to the battery to check on him. He just asks if I need him for something, then it's back to that console, or the work bench. He's all about his calibrations."

"From what I've seen of Garrus, he has his own reasons to be closed off. By the sound of it, this Sidonis thing really messed him up."

Garrus flinched at the name. But wait, he didn't tell anyone besides—

"Hold on, I thought I was the only one he told," Shepard said, voicing his thoughts.

"I'm on a space ship with nothing to do, Shepard!" Kasumi spoke as if it should be no shock. "You can't expect me to just sit in my room and twiddle my thumbs. Really."

"You were listening in on us?"

"I listen in on everybody. EDI catches me all the time, but no one else notices me when I have my cloaking devices on."

Shepard laughed. "And why would you sit and listen to Garrus and me?"

"Do you want the honest truth, or should I make something up?"

"I can never tell with you, so take your pick."

Kasumi giggled. "I'll tell you the truth, scout's honor … I like watching you two together. It reminds me a lot of me and Keiji, to be honest."

"You and Keiji?"

"We were partners, just like you two. We went through a lot together, but we always had each other's backs. Garrus would throw himself in front of any bullet for you without second thought, though you're pretty great at hurling yourself at bullets first. Some of the stuff Dr. Chakwas says about you … Anyway, I can tell by the way he looks and talks to you that he trusts you. Once you leave the room, though, I can tell he wanted to say more. I'm not sure what. He's not a mutterer like Mordin."

"We work well together. I would hope he trusts me."

"And, very similar to Keiji and me, I think there's a chance for it to be more."

"What?!" Shepard exclaimed. At the same moment, Garrus's eyebrow plates went up. He was thinking the same thing.

Kasumi only responded with a laugh. "Come on, you don't see it?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"That blush on your face says otherwise, Shep. I've always wondered what it'd be like with a turian, just how the whole thing works—"

"Please stop talking."

"—take a little maneuvering, definitely, but do it right and I bet he'd be able to—"

"Kasumi!"

The thief laughed again. "And that reaction alone means you've thought about it; am I right?"

"No! Not that way—"

"So in what way have you thought about it?"

"Listen, Garrus is one of the greatest people I've met. We get along, we fight extraordinarily well together, we have fun …"

"Perfect recipe for space ship romance," Kasumi cut in.

"But he'd never look at me like that. I know he wouldn't."

"And how can you be so sure?"

"He trusts me, and I trust him. Actually, he's one of the first I've trusted with everything in a long time … I would never risk breaking that kind of relationship just on the hope of having some fling."

"I doubt Shepard-Vakarian would be 'some fling.' You'll never know until you ask him."

"For God's sake, am I suddenly in high school?"

Kasumi's laugh made Shepard sigh. "What can I say? I enjoy the classics."

"Classics meaning …?"

"Girl meets turian, turian joins girl's military mission, girl dies, then gets brought back, turian goes on his own, only to be rescued by girl and her team to fight to save the galaxy together … It's practically out of a novel."

Shepard's laugh seemed to send a shiver through Garrus. "Page for page, right?"

"Almost verbatim!" He heard a nearly silent movement, sensing someone coming closer to the door. Garrus straightened up from the wall and went to press the button for the elevator. A rush of panic came over him as the contraption did nothing. "Listen, just think about it. I bet you'd be surprised. And even if it doesn't work out, I know Garrus will never back out on you. He cares about you too much."

"There isn't anything to think about, Kasumi …"

"Of course there is. You're still blushing. Good night, Shep."

Garrus was pressed against the wall next to the elevator, hoping that he was somehow invisible. Kasumi Goto stepped out with a grin across her face, her eyes covered by her black hood. She waited to step forward until the door closed behind her. Garrus cleared his throat, attempting to recover from his compromising position.

"Thanks, EDI," Kasumi said casually. The elevator doors opened the second she pressed the button.

"You are welcome, Miss Goto," EDI's formal voice replied above them.

Kasumi nodded toward the elevator. "Looks like you were heading out. We can share the ride."

"You knew I was here," Garrus muttered, realizing.

Kasumi's grin widened slightly. "Why do you think I brought you up?"

The turian followed the thief into the elevator, still disbelieving what he had heard. He crossed his arms and leaned against the wall as she pressed the button for the crew quarters deck.

"How could you possibly—"

"You're extremely quiet. It's rare for anyone to catch me off guard, though. I knew it was you after I mentioned your name. Pressing yourself into a wall doesn't actually help you hear better, you know."

"Did Shepard know? Was all that just to joke with me?"

Kasumi shook her head. "No joke, Garrus. Everything she said was what Shepard's been thinking. I know exactly what you're going to say, though."

"Do you?"

"You and Shepard are great partners on the field. She's an incredible commander who knows more about military and strategy than any human you've met, even in your C-Sec days. You respect her more than she'll ever know, but becoming personal with her seems to go against everything she represents. You want to know more about her, and you know you can trust her to know more about you, but you're afraid you'd be breaking protocol if you made a step in that direction."

Garrus blinked. "How did—"

"Turian fingers are harder to decipher when they're typing, but I got it figured out eventually. You were going to send that message to someone named Solana, but you changed your mind." Kasumi shrugged, looking upwards. "You've already heard my opinion. I think you guys have a real chance at going down that path. At the same time, both of you are absolutely terrified. Well, not terrified—neither of you are afraid of anything, really—you're confused, I think. It is a risk, but how can you know if it's worth it until you try?"

"I never—" the turian stopped momentarily. This whole conversation caught him off-guard. "I wouldn't even know what to do. She's human, first of all …"

"That hasn't stopped other turians before."

"She didn't even go after someone of her species …"

"That Kaidan guy? He was cute, and seemed like a sweetheart, but not her type. It's not who she needs."

"How am I what she needs?"

Kasumi laughed softly. "Like I said, I'm great at watching people. You see Shepard. Not a commander, not a Spectre, not a military hero, or a failure … definitely not a genetic abomination like she thinks she is … You see her. That is something she always remembers."

"Well, of course I see her … she's Shepard."

"You'd be surprised how many people have trouble seeing her, not the image everyone else has made of her. It really bothers her …" Kasumi noticed the look on Garrus's face. "She talks in her sleep once in a while."

"You've … seen her sleep? How has EDI not locked you out of her cabin?"

"I've made bets with her about if anyone will catch me. Surprisingly enough, she hasn't ratted me out yet. I kind of like her, for being an AI."

"Thank you, Ms. Goto," EDI answered.

"You're welcome."

The elevator halted on the crew quarters deck. Garrus followed the thief out. As she began to head toward the Port Observation room, she looked over her shoulder to him.

"Both of you really should think about it," she said. "And no, not just to fulfill my drama quota, but because I think both of deserve something good for once."

With that, she disappeared into her room, leaving Garrus with the most baffled expression a turian could hold.

Back in the present, Garrus opened his eyes to look around Shepard's cabin once again. He silently urged Wrex and his team to get to the Crucible quickly, and do whatever they could to bring her back. Kasumi was definitely right about one thing:

Shepard-Vakarian would never be "just some fling."