A/N: Random banter. Bad pick up lines are bad, but Naruto's the type the use them, especially after having a cheesy mentor like Jiraiya.
Drabble: Pick Up Lines
"Hey, Gaara…"
"Yes, Naruto?"
"Is that a kunai in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"
Gaara paused, pen stopping in the midst of writing up some insignificant trade tax for one of Suna's tiny desert villages. He gave his friend an odd look, that had he been another person would be interpreted as surprise and confusion.
"My robes have no pockets, I do not carry kunai, and I am always happy to see you, Naruto." A pale brow furrowed. "You should know this by now."
Naruto gaped, blue eyes wide and incredulous in the face of his friend's faint bemusement.
"What?" Gaara inquired, somewhat defensive at the look.
…
"Hey! Heeyyy! Hey, Gaara!"
The person in question blinked and turned his head a bit, eyes shifting to watch the approach of his friend, who was frantically waving as he skidded to a stop before the working crew. The shinobi of Suna, well-used to the Leaf shinobi's lack of decorum in the face of their Kazekage, merely continued on with their work with faint murmurs and looks of amused exasperation at their leader's faint nod.
Hairless brows furrowed as pale green eyes met sapphire blue, calmly searching for any hint of a disturbance. "Is there something wrong?" Gaara wondered aloud, even though he was already certain this wasn't the case.
Naruto grinned. "Do you have a map?"
The crease between Gaara's forehead deepened the slightest bit in confusion. "A…map? Is there somewhere I need to escort you to…?"
The characteristic fox-squint appeared on his friend's face, along with a faint snicker. "Yeah, because I think I just got lost in your eyes…"
Silence. "I'm going to assume you're trying to say you got lost in the Yorais Basin on the way here," Gaara deadpanned, and began leading the way to one of the few restaurants he knew to serve ramen.
"You're no fun!" Naruto whined, scratching moodily on his whiskers as he followed. Then his eyes slit open and focused sharply on the redhead, who tensed warily beneath his kage robes. That was Naruto's I'm-in-the-mood-to-prank look, and Gaara knew it well enough to anticipate that whatever Naruto had planned he may not necessarily like.
Naruto had been acting odd all day and asking him strange questions. He was beginning to get suspicious though.
"Can you give me directions?" Naruto asked seemingly innocent.
"To where?" Gaara asked, thoroughly confused. What could Naruto possibly need directions to that he hadn't seen before in Gaara's own company?
"To your heart!" his friend gleefully burst out, sharp canines bared in his full grin.
The woman whose roof Naruto crashed through in a wave of sand was thankfully relocated and reimbursed within the next hour.