Chapter Summary:

Naru looks back over the past year since his departure from Japan.

Scene set: Richmond upon Thames, London, England

Naru sat on a bench overlooking the Thames without having to glower at people. It was one of the positive things about being back in England, particularly in this area of London. People didn't approach or try to speak with strangers.

Saying goodbye to his team in Japan had been surprisingly hard. He had accepted their farewells with a very thawed out frosty demeanour, especially now that they knew his true identity and what his purpose had been in setting up SPR. It had surprised him that none were upset with him at his deception, especially Mai. Despite the circumstances, he had been glad to have that weight off his shoulders, especially as it meant the definitive end to Masako's harassing and blackmailing. That would be something he would never understand.

What turned out to be harder was saying goodbye to his assistant Mai. Truthfully, she was more than just an 'assistant'. She was far more than that. She had always understood him to a degree further than the rest, and had never treated him differently, even from the beginning. She had been insufferable and always challenged him to his limits, but it was precisely why he held her in a special light, away from the others. He was never one to quickly praise people or let them in, but she had somehow found a way into his emotions, his thoughts and nearly every aspect of his life.

It had been just over a year since he had left Japan and yet he found himself thinking about her more often. Had they not had their talk before his departure, he might have made up some sort of scientific explanation to why he missed her. Or something like that. He still didn't know quite what to make of his feelings, other than his deep fondness for her. They hadn't spoken much during that time either, other than the occasional gift. Was it cowardly of him to hide behind his work? Probably.

*~*~*Flashback #1*~*~*

*~*~*Airport departure*~*~*

He remained frozen in place, eyes closed, as he felt the rush of emotions pouring from her as he briefly felt her lips millimetres away from his. It had been more than he had ever experienced. He was unsure what to do with what had just happened. He remained rooted to the spot as he watched her walk back towards the group. He broke out of his trance-like state when Lin called his name out, just past the security point.

He rejoined the queue and caught sight of Mai being embraced by the various members of their tight knit group and a series of laughs breaking out as they began walking away. A part of him wished that Mai would look back, but he instinctively knew that wouldn't happen. However, he did lock eyes with Yasu who simply gave him a look which seemed to say, "She loves you. Don't this fuck up." The problem was that he wasn't sure of anything. Why would it be him? What was the logic there?

He rejoined Lin as soon as he was past security and indicated towards one of the coffee kiosks.

"You're unusually quiet. More so than usual." Lin said to him. "I also don't think I've ever seen you willingly hug someone for that long, other than Gene and your mother."

Naru remained quiet as he picked up their coffees and began leading the way towards the First Class lounge. Once they checked-in and found a quiet place to sit, he replied, "Yes. I have accepted that she has become just as important in my life as he is. Lin, I'm out of my depth here. I don't know what to do. What to think. What to feel. I don't have a benchmark to compare all of this to."

Lin's eyebrows shot upwards. "It's not often I hear you admit you don't know something. I felt very similar when I was trying to figure out what to do with how I felt with Madoka. It's not something anyone can help you with. It's something you will have to figure out for yourself. That is partially why you, as you put it, don't have a benchmark to compare it to. The closest person in your life prior to Mai was Gene, and even then, that was completely different. I'm not surprised she became such a prominent figure in your life. You might be better off talking with Madoka about this."

*~*~*Flashback #2*~*~*

*~*~*Christmas*~*~*

He had written the first draft of the research he had undertaken 'in the field' during his time in Japan. As he sat staring at the finished bundle, he realised he would have to likely do a full translation of it to English. He didn't quite understand what had prompted him to do it in Japanese first, until Lin suggested it be reviewed by one of their former SPR colleagues.

"Perhaps Mai? She won't be afraid to tell you if she thinks something doesn't sound correct. I am sure she can also help you with any kanji errors you might have made." suggested Lin.

Naru simply hummed before replying, "Yes, you might be right."

Lin left Naru to his thoughts after further discussions on whether to translate that first draft to English or await Mai's comments.

He looked at the calendar and realised that a certain silly holiday was coming up. He would never quite understand why Mai had insisted on celebrating Christmas when it wasn't really a holiday in Japan. He couldn't deny that it had brought a smile to his face, although internally of course.

He decided to go out to clear his head and chose Bushy Park near his home as it was one of the calmest places in the evening. As he walked towards the park, he passed a small bookshop and paused. He realised he was still unsure on how to approach sending Mai his draft without it coming across as rude. He decided he would send her a Christmas card.

All that was left now was to select one. After looking through the small selection, he eventually came across a simple one that had two barn owls on the cover.

A light dusting of pink appeared on his cheekbones as he thought of the symbolism behind Barn Owls. The inside of the card was blank, which was perfect for what he wanted to write to her.

Mai,

As you know, I have always valued your input, and hope you can take some time to read through this.

You're the first one who to see this first manuscript, so please make sure you don't leave it somewhere.

Make sure you stay out of trouble.

Yours faithfully,

Naru

*~*~*Series of flashbacks #3*~*~*

*~*~*Valentine's Day and White Day*~*~*

To say he was surprised would be an understatement. He knew that Mai had received the manuscript and had been proofing it, but he didn't expect to receive it back as part of a 'Valentine's Day' gift. His smile expanded when he saw that she had included a pack of dark chocolate that he had taken a fancy to. What caught his attention though was a light green metal tin which was engraved in calligraphy, Naru's Blend.

Dear Naru,

Happy Valentine's Day!

I hope you enjoy your gift. I remembered the chocolate you always seemed to enjoy here so you'll find a few bars in there.

I've also included another batch of your tea blend. I know how much you drink tea. All you have to do is reach out and let me know you need more.

Yours,

Mai

She always seemed to know what he needed. Even when he had been at his foulest mood, she had always seemed to know what to do to help calm him down.

He should have known that Madoka would be watching him open the gift. Especially when she, not so subtly, reminded him about the tradition of White Day in Japan. He hadn't forgotten of course, but it had caused him a bit of an issue. He knew he would have still thought about sending her something for White Day, even if she hadn't sent him a Valentine's Day gift.

Despite his own self-arguments, he had come to accept that the only thing that had kept him from returning to Japan was writing his book, and understanding his own feelings (something Gene kept telling him to try anytime he looked in a mirror to reach out to him). Easier said than done.

He had never paid much attention to things like that. The topic of love and anything like it had seemed like a trivial thing that he had always ignored, satisfied that his brother's enthusiasm for 'feelings' was enough to make up for his own lack of.

It had been on his birthday, about two months after his return to England, that he realised he missed the low-key celebration that Mai and the SPR gang had done for him the previous year. Mai had instinctively known that he wouldn't want a fuss made over it, despite not knowing the reasons why.

He hadn't argued with his parents when they insisted on throwing a large birthday event for him with fellow BSPR colleagues. He knew it was their own way of celebrating his return and, despite the circumstances, the return of Gene where he could be laid to rest.

When his parents, Lin and Madoka suggested going to Kew Gardens, he agreed to go since it would give him plenty of space to think. It was while he wandered through some of the themed gardens that he began thinking about what he could give her.

He wanted something that could be of practical use, should she choose to use it, but also something that would look nice on a shelf. He knew her well enough that it was a 50/50 split as to whether she would use a gift or not. It perhaps stemmed from her independence that she sometimes chose not to use items gifted to her, simply because they looked much nicer on a shelf or her desk.

A journal. That would serve purpose in appearance and practicality if she wanted to use it, either for dreams, general thoughts, or even in her academic life.

He began walking towards one of the main shops near the entrance/exit, and saw Lin approaching from the corner of his eye. He paused to let the tall man catch up with him before speaking, "Lin, I'm not good with words, but I still want to give her something that will remind her she isn't just another person to me… That she means more to me. I was thinking of getting her a journal but I'm at a loss."

Lin led him in a separate direction of the shop. "What about something that features either the Sakurasou flower, or the Japanese Camellia flower?"

Before Naru could respond, he saw Madoka approaching them. He quickly grabbed the journal and walked away towards one of the tills, hoping she wouldn't see. At the till he decided to grab a small book on flowers and their different meanings.

It was afterwards that he took a moment to look up what those specific flowers meant, and why Lin had suggested them for Mai. He had known that Lin was well-versed in the 'flower language'. Was it probable that Lin had a better inclination of his feelings towards the brunette?

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*~*~*Series of flashbacks: #4*~*~*

*~*~*Mai's Birthday*~*~*

He knew it was futile to try and restrain his feelings any longer. He had finally arrived at the conclusion that he was 'in love'. It wasn't just a deep fondness that he felt. It was far more than that. However, that didn't mean that he was confident in what it meant. After all, he had nearly been away for a year and he didn't know what to do with his feelings. He was never one to act rashly and impulsively. He was a man of logic and well-thought out plans. He was also unsure if, after all this time, she still felt the same.

Insecurities began creeping up. Deep down he kept having to remind himself that when she admitted her feelings towards him, she had emphasised it was to him and not his brother. It still didn't stop him from sometimes wondering if he did hear that correctly - not that he would admit it to anyone.

He had stayed in touch with Yasuhara (although not through choice) after he was emailed. Yasu had deemed it appropriate to give him frequent updates on what was going on with the SPR gang, with a particular emphasis on Mai. This was how he had been made aware that Yasu and Mai were living together. Lin had arrived in time to stop him from slamming the laptop lid down, and to encourage him to finish reading the email.

The way it had been written made it appear as if it was leading to the revelation that Yasu and Mai were dating. Lin thought that was probably for the best that Naru wasn't near Yasu, who would have gained amusement Naru's facial expression coming.

Apparently during his absence, Mai and Masako had thawed out the bridge between them and had become close friends if the pictures Yasu sent him via email were anything to go by. He was glad he didn't give Yasu his british phone number. It was bad enough he had his email address.

He had recently been forced to watch British rom-com films, one of which was Love Actually . Naru had never seen it and when he was dragged out of his office by Madoka and his mother, he suspected more was at play. Especially when they deemed it the film for the newly-minted 'family movie night'. Again, he and Lin were of the mind that Yasu and Madoka had conspired in one way or another to get him to watch the film that Mai had loved.

In one of his recent emails, Yasu had helpfully informed Naru that they would be away as a 'team' to have a series of mini-holidays in the lead-up to Mai's birthday. They had all planned it so that Mai was guaranteed to be at home on the actual day of her birthday.

This was how he decided to search for one of the family-run florists not far from where the old SPR office had been. He picked out a mixture of hydrangeas and light pink roses in a cream white vase that Mai would be able to reuse. Against his better instinct, he decided to include a birthday card with a quote from Love Actually , "To me, you are perfect.". He never thought he would ever say such a thing, but here he was.

There was one thing to be said about him though. He was a coward and hoped Mai would realise that the flowers and card were from him.

*~*~*Present Day*~*~*

Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed a blue police box that seemed very out of place.

End Notes:

Fun fact: Barn owls mate for life!
As a reminder, this is part 1 of 2 of Naru's POV. I am sorry if he's a bit OCC. I'm basing him off of various friends when they came to the realisation that they liked/loved someone!

As usual, if you would like to see pictures used for this chapter, hop on over to my tumblr - ahsokamaigranger !

Obligatory statement:

I do not own nor make any profit from Ghost Hunt, it's characters or my imagination.