Chapter Seventy-Three

"What'd I tell ya about watching your left?" Eliot was more than satisfied with how furiously Hardison's thumb was moving across the controller, desperate to find a helpful combination.

"How are you doing that?" Hardison barely asked as he kept all his focus on the screen.

"What, smashing your head?" Eliot accented his words with another jab from his virtual character.

"Not even" He denied.

"Dude, are you blind?" Eliot scoffed. "If this was real life your face would be fractured, your cheeks would be minced, your nose would be dust!"

"It's scary how…"

"Yes!" Eliot's enthused fist bump had him turning his attention back to the screen that was now flashing KO in bright red.

"You so cheated!"

"What? How!" Eliot demanded.

"You distracted me!"

"I did not!" Eliot rolled his eyes.

"Cuz it's not at all distracting to hear how happy turning my face into dust makes you." Hardison dropped his controller on the coffee table as he lifted his orange soda.

"Alright, but what's your excuse for the other seven knockouts?" Eliot reminded smugly.

"I think you're lying about the amount of video games you've played, but you tell me."

"Look at the game you picked Hardison! Had it been any other we'd be looking at a different story, but boxing? A fight's a fight and I like hitting people." Video game or not, punching people he could definitely do.

"You seriously mean that." Hardison put his soda back down in partial bemusement. "You like hitting people."

"Not like that." Eliot was quick on defense.

"Like what?" Hardison was confused by the sudden change of tone.

"Like how you're saying it, how you're thinking it!"

"El calm down, I swear I'm not thinking anything. I was just restating what you said." He placed his hand on Eliot's shoulder to prevent him from moving off the couch. "It's okay if you like," He couldn't believe he was saying this. "hitting people."

"See," Eliot pushed his hand away. "you don't get it."

"Well then explain it to me." Hardison tried for rational, not knowing if Eliot was genuinely upset or just facing another mood shift.

"I say I like hitting people but the way you say it tells me that you heard I like hurting people and that ain't the same man!" Eliot pushed himself from the couch angrily. "I don't get any kind of pleasure out of hurting somebody. I'm not a sadist."

"I never said you were El." Hardison tried to appease.

"Sometimes people get hurt, sure, but it isn't about that. It's about becoming a worthy opponent, about perfecting a skill, about learning control, about relieving frustration. It's about knowing all those things and using them to determine when not to hit."

"Look Eliot, you've saved my skin enough times that I can honestly say, I like that you like to hit dudes that are trying to hit me. It's what works for you and I know you're not out there beating on anybody that hasn't asked for it so don't even worry about it." Heck, with a girlfriend that petted money and had a near fetish for deadly heights, he wasn't exactly allowed to say what was reasonable.

"I…" Eliot sat back down with a large exhale. "I shouldn't have jumped on you like that."

"You had every right Eliot. Hell, I would've done the same." It finally looked like the opportunity had arisen to get some things off his chest. "I've been an ass lately and I'm sorry for that. I just want you to know that I've always supported you even if it was only in my own stupid way. But no matter what I've got your back. You can count on it."

"Thanks" Hardison hadn't said anything he didn't already know, but it was still nice to hear.

"How 'bout another round?" Hardison suggested as he lifted his controller to clear the KO from the screen.

"Naw" Eliot rejected the idea as he stretched his leg out onto the table. "I'd love to go scrappin' though."

Hardison actually laughed at that. "Nate would kill us both."

"Wouldn't he though," Eliot smirked as he shook he's head. "He's so frustrating."

"How so?" Hardison offered an ear. Now that he'd apologized he wanted to move forward with their relationship.

"You've seen the way he breathes down my neck. I know he means well but I don't need a father. Especially not a nagging one." Eliot turned to Hardison as he pushed a good length of hair from his face.

"So tell him that. Let him know what you do need." Hardison spoke simply enough; after all it was a simple thing to do.

"I'm more worried about what he needs. He doesn't talk to me." He rolled his eyes at the mere thought of all the things he could hear Nate not saying. "Everything with him is cryptic, like he thinks I'll break if he asks for something."

"Y'all just need to reconnect."

"Tell me about it." He wasn't big on sharing, but if Nate got to vent to some stranger why couldn't he vent to Hardison? "Only problem is he has the worst possible timing."

"Timing?" Hardison didn't quite understand. Well that was until he got a look at the one Eliot was giving him. "Oh!" He did his best not to scrunch his nose as he offered, "I was talking about y'all having a date night or something."

"Or something" Eliot nodded his agreement.
He needed to have this conversation with Nate but something always came along and pushed it to the back burner.

"Why can't you pick the… umm… the timing though?" Hardison tried his best for not awkward. "It's not like you were ever shy, at least not when it came to bragging about that kind of stuff."

"I don't know man." Eliot sighed as he rubbed a hand over the back of his neck. "He's just different. There's not…" He shook his head as he rationalized, "I shouldn't be laying this on you."

"Just say what you gotta say El." If it meant showing his friend support he'd willingly step out of his comfort zone.

"It just isn't how it used to be. He doesn't look at me the same anymore and I don't see what I used to in him." If it wasn't so cliché he would say they were losing their spark.

"Are you saying you're not attracted to him anymore?" Any discomfort was firmly placed to the side as worry began screaming within. He was seriously about to freak out.

"Damn it Hardison," Eliot breathed out with no real malice. "No matter which way I say this I'm gonna sound like an ass."

"Eliot, what ARE you saying?" That freak-out was getting closer and closer.

"Naw Hardison, it's not like that." He shook his head at the thought of what Hardison was implying. "It's just... He's too nice to me… too gentle, too considerate. He's treating me with kid gloves and I HATE it!"

"How do you want to be treated?" Alec wouldn't even try to lie; he was confused.

"I don't know." He couldn't really explain disliking something so many others would be happy with.

"Yes you do." And Hardison was intent on finding out so he could give his friend the best advice possible.

"Right now he's just a very…" Eliot took a moment to think of the word that would best describe Nate currently. "Careful man. He wonders, and he worries, and he second-guesses himself and I don't like it." The look on Hardison's face told him he needed to further the thought. "I'm aggressive… And he used to be that way too! He knew what he wanted, he was assertive, he was so confident he was cocky. Hell, he was nearly…"

"A jackass." Hardison couldn't help but slip in. Nate was family and all but there was no denying when he was too self-assured he became one arrogant s.o.b.

"Yes, and it was damn enticing."

"Well," Hardison decided to ignore the tone Eliot had used on that last bit. "I don't think he's changed all that much." He doubted you could change a character like Nate's. "I just think that he needs time to realize you're really on the mend and that he doesn't have to be so watchful anymore."

"You think?" Eliot wondered in earnest. An outside perspective was extremely valuable at the moment.

"I do. I mean y'all have both changed a little bit, but with everything you've been through it's to be expected. If you ask me those changes have been for the better though. So maybe things aren't how they used to be between you, but that doesn't mean you can't get them back to where you want them. All you got to do is find your footing."

"I wouldn't even know where to start." And it seriously irritated him.

"Start by being Eliot Spencer. You said it yourself, you're aggressive, so be aggressive and get what you want. Command his attention and go from there." Hardison did his best to be helpful. "I can't really give you much more advice than that but y'all shouldn't really need any seeing how you started your relationship." He was seriously contemplating the idea of breaching this subject with Nate on behalf of Eliot.

"It's not even that though Hardison." That last remark had him realizing he and Alec weren't quite on the same page. "I'm talking mindset not sex."

"Well alright then." The bluntness of that told Alec shit was about to get real.

"You said it nicely but I'll lay it straight; I'm the king of one-nighters and that's exactly how we started. Since then we've built a relationship off of that physicality though and to me that's more important than sex. I've committed to sharing that part of myself completely with this one person and that requires a certain headspace. If he's not sharing it though, if I don't know where his head's at, I can't go there. That's something I can't do."

"Sounds like you need to get in his head then." If need be he'd take it upon himself to get these two back on the same page.

"I just need him to be open with me and right now he's not. He's…" Eliot sighed out in frustration. Was it so bad for him to want Nate to worry, think, and talk about himself from time to time? "He's being a mother hen and…"

"Nobody wants to sleep with their mother." Eliot's burst of laughter made Hardison smile. "I had to man, shit was getting deep."

"I'm just…"

"Waiting for him to treat you like his man and not his charity case." Hardison gave words to what he saw on Eliot's face.

"Exactly! It was actually surprising that Alec was this understanding.

"I should get you a paper or something so you can write all this down for Nate." In the least he'd have footnotes to reference.

"Like a letter?" Hardison nodded his confirmation and Eliot continued, "I wouldn't know how to start something like that." It had him thinking back to the one Nate had penned for him; he couldn't possibly match it.

"You'd start with 'Dear Nate' then go on to describe some of your attributes."

"Wouldn't I describe his?" He wasn't an expert by any means, but he figured boasting about yourself wasn't the way to start a letter to someone else.

"Normally," Hardison agreed. "but if you describe yours it gives you the chance to paint the way you want him to see you. Start shaping things so to say."

"I don't know." Eliot's hesitance was obvious. It didn't sound like the best way to go about things.

"Sure you do. You just go 'Dear Nate' then tell him you're hot as hell and he's mental for having his head up his ass and not taking advantage of that."

"Did you just tell me to tell Nate to take advantage of me?" Eliot lifted an eyebrow in levity.

"Only if you think it'll work." Hardison shrugged; if this conversation hadn't been so personal he was sure he'd be embarrassed, but as it was he was faring well. Well mostly.

"But you should probably get closer to home with the rest of it. Tell him you don't like being treated like some delicate wallflower, that you want him to take off the kid gloves and be rougher with ya."

"Nate doesn't like it rough." Eliot's joke left Hardison wide eyed and sputtering. "I'm just playin' man." Eliot did his best to pacify Hardison, though it was hard with the face he was sporting.

"Now I support ya and all," Hardison started. He ignored Eliot's amusement as he layed a hand across his chest. "but my heart ain't equipped to handle these kinds of remarks just yet."

Eliot laughed at that. If there was one thing you could count on Hardison for it was dramatics.

"Any who" Hardison dragged out in an attempt to change the subject. "I don't think you have anything to worry about. Nate worships you."

"He does not." Eliot rolled his eyes at that.

"Close to it." It really was amazing to see how dedicated Nate of all people had become to… well, Eliot of all people. "Just get everything laid out between you and y'all will be fine."

Eliot nodded his head in agreement. "You're right. I just have to find the best time to do it." He had no doubts about being able to get things settled with Nate, it was just starting the process of settling them that worried him.

"Well when you do let me know. I'll make sure y'all get some privacy." He'd gladly disappear with Parker for a night or two if it meant helping his friends avoid some bumpy roads.

"Thanks Hardison" Eliot offered honestly. "I appreciate it."

"Don't even mention it." Hardison brushed off the attention as he fiddled with the controller he'd just retrieved from the coffee table.

"How 'bout another game?" Eliot offered.
If Hardison wouldn't accept a verbal thank-you he'd show his appreciation by spending his time sharing an activity Hardison clearly enjoyed.

"Sweet" Hardison was quick to pass Eliot's controller back. "Do you want to keep boxing or start drag racing?"

"Let's see what else I can beat you at?" Eliot joked as Hardison switched games.

"Well see alright." Hardison offered competitively as he resettled himself on the couch. "And El" Hardison turned serious for a moment. "If you want, I'll pretend this conversation never happened."

Eliot couldn't help the smile that spread with Hardison's offer. "What conversation?"

"That's what I thought" Hardison shook his head as he turned back to the TV. Eliot on the other hand continued to gaze at Hardison. This time around he really did seem to understand and that thought made Eliot proud in his choice of friend. Hardison was a good one, his best one, and he'd repay the favor by… well, he'd repay it by beating Hardison at his own game. He shook his head with a slight laugh as he turned his attention to the screen and Hardison's explanation of how to customize the cars.

This would be interesting.