Chapter 3 – What if

"I'll see you guys after school!" I waved them off as I leaned against the railing, Wes and Allison climbed onto the bus as Liam and Emma left an hour earlier for school. I sighed as I pushed away from the railing, the bus disappearing from my view.

Going into the kitchen, I tackled the mess of breakfast, putting away cereal, cleaning the counters. Washing up splashed milk and putting the rest of the lunch supplies away. "Lo," she came running into the kitchen still in her pajamas. A giggle forming over her lips, her hair sticking out at every angle, I couldn't help but laugh, "Do you want to go play with Grandma Lucille or Auntie Taylor?" I asked.

"Grandma!" she shouted, I smiled, "Alright, let me call Grandma and we will see okay?"

"Okay," she totted back into the living room where Disney was on. I reached for the phone as I dialed Lucille's number out of sheer knowing. "Hello?"

"Hey Lucille,"

"Gabi! What's up?"

"Do you care if Lauren comes and plays with you today? I have an appointment at twelve thirty, it shouldn't be long,"

"Of course sweetie!" Lucille said, "I would love for her too! Miles is coming over today too,"

"Perfect, I'll bring her by around noon okay?"

"Sure thing,"

"Bye Lucille,"

"Bye Gabs,"

Once hanging up, I made sure Lauren was okay in the living room and I locked her in as I went down to the laundry room to switch out the clothes and hang some up. After starting it, I went back upstairs to see Disney had ended and Lo was playing with a set of toys.

"Mommy is going to go take a shower, do you want to watch Dora or Mickey?" I asked her, she weighed the options and she smiled, "Mickey!" I smiled as I turned on an episode, I refilled her juice and then I went upstairs.

I took off my clothes and I jumped into the warm shower. The goose bumps traveled over my body as I washed my hair and body a couple of times, my fingers moving over my breast as I shook my head as it was probably nothing.

Once I rinsed off, dried off and wrapped a towel around me. I went to check on Lo who was coloring in one of her books and watching the TV. I snuck back upstairs as I pulled on a pair of jeans with a bra and a tank top.

I blew dried my hair and moved around in the bedroom. I pulled my hair back into a ponytail and then I grabbed a zip-up jacket, slipping on my flats.

I glanced to see it was just a little after nine; I had plenty of time still. "Lo, come here sweetie, we need to get you changed." I told her, she stood up and I lifted her over the gate and up the stairs.

She giggled as she talked about her recent episode of Mickey Mouse; I grabbed a pair of leggings with a sweater. I changed her, "Do you have to go potty?" I asked her, she though about it and then nodded as she went running for the bathroom.

I followed as I helped her; she went pee and then cleaned herself up. I smiled, "Good girl," she grinned as we washed her hands together and then I went to change her. She hugged me as she kissed my cheek. "I love you mommy,"

"I love you too Lo," she grinned and giggled as I put a pair of socks over her feet. "You are a nut," I told her with a smile, she scrunched her nose up, "You're a nut!" she said back, I laughed and shook my head.

"No you are a nut,"

Setting her back into the living room, she went back to playing. I put the dishes away, made myself water and I looked at the clock.

Ten thirty.

This was going to be a long ass morning.

"Gabriella Bolton?" I let my head snap up as I put my magazine away and I stood up to walk over to the lady. "Right this way," I smiled as she brought me through the back room and sat me down. "Any reason in particular today that you are getting a mammogram?" she asked me, I sighed, "My breasts are tender and I'm not sure what the hell a lump feels likes, plus, I have never had one so I thought I might as well."

"Well I am going to have a doctor first come and exam you and then we can do a mammogram okay?" I nodded as she pressed her lips together, "You have signed and filled out all of the paper right?"

"Yes," I replied, "Alright, well the doctor shouldn't be long," I nodded my head as I played on my phone as I waited patiently for the doctor to walk into the room, a sigh left my mouth as I leaned back. Troy texted me about his contract and I told him to do and ask for whatever he thought was reasonable. A soft knock came at the door and a female doctor popped in.

"Gabriella?"

"Gabi," I respond reaching my hand out, she gave me a smile, and "It's nice to meet you, I'm Doctor Manson" I nodded my head, "Like wise,"

"So you are a mom right?"

"A mom to five,"

"What ages?"

I smiled, "Sixteen, Fourteen, Twelve, Six and Two,"

"Aw a wide scale," I nodded, "Did you have any concerns with your breasts during any pregnancies or after during breastfeeding?"

"None," I replied, "I didn't breastfeed with my first child," I then told her, "How old are you again?" she asked, "thirty-eight,"

"You don't look a day over thirty," I smiled, "My husband just told me the same thing the other day,"

"Well then we know he isn't lying," I laughed quietly as she smiled, "I am going to do my own exam before sending you to a mammogram just because they said you said you were having some soreness and tenderness?" I nodded, "Yes and it shouldn't be because of my period. I had that about two weeks ago,"

"Well let's see, do you mind taking your shirt and bra off for me?" I shrugged, as I had grown comfortable with my body after having five kids. I stripped my shirt and then my bra as she had me relax.

Now, I wasn't going to lie. It was awkward to have somebody else touching my boobs besides Troy. "Does it hurt just touching here?" she asked, "It's not a oh my god you are killing me pain it's just noticeable." I told her, she nodded as she pulled away and wrote something down. "I don't think it's anything serious but I would like you to do the mammogram and an ultrasound today if you don't mind, just to make sure,"

I nodded, "Yea, I can do that," I said with a soft smile, I put my bra and shirt back on. "She'll come in here in a minute to talk to you and get you ready," I smiled and nodded as I patted the spot next to me nervously.

"Gabi," a nurse walked in and I smiled, "Right this way dear," I grabbed my purse and I followed her out of the door. She led me to a darker room as I stripped again and sat down in a chair.

She talked to me about everything she was about to do and I nodded, as suddenly I was scared. She didn't do anything that made me want to be scared but everything was moving so fast that I didn't understand.

Suddenly my boobs were being squished together and were being taken photos of. I took a deep breath as she gave me an encouraging smile, once it was over, I put my clothes back on but not for long, only to be moved to the next room to have an handheld ultrasound done.

The same lady was with me as she chatted nicely about my kids, she gave me a warm blanket and I was ready to take a nap as she did everything. The cold gel against my breasts made me shiver as she talked about her kids and her job.

"I saw your last name was Bolton, I only have to ask,"

"Yea, he is my husband,"

"He is a very lucky guy then," I smiled and nodded, after a while, she went silent and I took the opportunity to close my eyes. "Honey, stay right here, I need to ask if the radiologist wants any other photos okay?"

"Alright,"

She was gone for about ten minutes and then came back, "He wants a couple more, and you are almost done okay?"

"Thanks," my stomach knotted in a ball as when she was done, I cleaned myself up and put my bra and shirt back on. "They want you to wait in the waiting room for the radiologist to report back to you okay?" I nodded my head, as suddenly nothing seemed right.

More pictures, lots of encouraging smiles, my hands began to shake as I was getting ahead over myself. I pulled out my phone to realize Emma would be getting home soon and I wasn't going to be there at the house for that.

I dialed Lucille's phone number, "Hello?"

"Hey Luc,"

"Gabs! Did you appointment go okay?"

"It's a little backed up, do you mind if you meet the kids at the house? They were not expecting me to be gone today and I don't think they grabbed their keys,"

"No problem sweetie! Is everything okay? You sound upset," I tried to take a big breath, "No, I'm fine. I'll talk to you later okay?"

"Okay!"

After hanging up, I waited a couple more minutes before I got up to grab a thing of water. I took sips with my shaking hands, "Gabi," I stood up as a male, a tall male with dark hair was waiting for me.

I followed him in and he shut the door behind him as I looked around as a lot of images were around on the screens. I glanced at all of them as my stomach dropped, "Gabi would you like to have a seat?"

I nodded my head as I sat down, the radiologist sat on the opposite side of me and he took a deep breath. "We found a couple of things today that we need to get checked out," my head began to spin as I looked at him, my mouth dry, "What did you find?" I asked softly, "We found four lesions in each breast," a sudden alarm was ringing in my head, "Lesions?" I asked, my throat beyond dry.

"Tumors, your right breast has the bigger ones and your left are smaller but we don't quiet know about them yet," I closed my eyes as I looked at him, "We need you to get a biopsy and an MRI done by tomorrow and," I took a deep breath, "Stop," I took a minute to control my breathing as I looked at him, "You are saying I have breast cancer?" I asked, he shook his head, "Not at all, these could simply just be tumors that need to be removed but that is why you need to get the biopsy done and an MRI,"

Taking a small breath, I nodded, "Okay, when?"

"We have a three forty five," my eyes glanced to see it was a little after two. "I can do that,"

"Good, now, you might want to take somebody with you okay?" I nodded as he escorted me out, suddenly my mind was swirling. I clutched onto a railing as there was supposed to be nothing wrong.

I finally called my OB who I just saw four months ago and nothing like this was even a concern. I needed to talk to her. She knew me inside and out.

"Dr. Kelly's office,"

"Is Dr. Kelly able to talk?" I asked, a small panic rising in my voice, "Yes, one moment," I sat in my car as I suddenly felt alone and scared. "Dr. Kelly,"

"Dr. Kelly, Gabi Bolton,"

"Gabi! So nice to hear from you, is their something wrong dear?"

"I had a mammogram today and they found four tumors in each breast and I don't know, they are sending me to get a biopsy and an MRI, I'm freaking out and I don't know,"

"Okay, hang on, calm down, take a breath," I did as she told, "Explain to me everything you went through today," I did as told and she was quiet for a minute, "I have a friend who is a breast surgeon at Mercy's who I would recommend you see. Forget the people they lined you up with, I'll call her to check you out okay? I'll call you back in a minute,"

I thanked her as she calmed me; telling me it was probably nothing. I glanced at my phone and I suddenly thought about Troy. I had to have him home. I needed him home.

I fingers shook as I went to call him but Dr. Kelly was calling me back, "Can you go to Mercy hospital tomorrow at eight in the morning?" she asked me, "Yes," I replied, "I can,"

"Go over there and see Dr. Trisha Mills,"

"Okay,"

"Gabi, it's probably nothing to be worried about. I just saw you a couple of weeks ago and you were healthy."

"Okay," I said, seeming to be the only word I could get out. "Don't go to the biopsy or MRI today okay? Cancel that appointment, tell them you have another one with a different doctors okay?"

"Okay, thank you Dr. Kelly,"

"No problem, I'll talk to you later okay,"

"Alright," I hung up as I drove home, my mind in overdrive as I found myself back at the cemetery. I got out as called to cancel the one appointment. I settled on the ground, as I looked at the headstone, "Daddy, what's going on?" I asked him, my voice in a small whimper.

I felt tears in my eyes as I sat in front of him, "I mean daddy, I don't understand." I leaned back against it as my stomach rocked with emotions. I know I needed to call Troy and I knew I needed to do something but I was too upset to even form the words.

I chewed on my lip as I finally dug out my phone and I called Troy.

The phone rang a couple of times and then he picked up, "Hey there," I swallowed as I took a big breath, "Hey, uhm," I struggled to find words as I blinked, "I think you need to come home tonight," I said softly, "Brie, baby what's wrong?" he asked, "Are the kids okay?"

"The kids are all fine," I responded, I took a deep breath, "I'm not okay though,"

"Gabs," he said, his voice growing impatient, "Troy, I had a mammogram today,"

"A mamo what?"

"A mammogram, breasts,"

"Oh," suddenly Troy gasped, "Brie,"

"They found eight tumors, four between each breast," I whispered, tears collecting in my eyes. "I have a biopsy and a MRI tomorrow morning at 8 with a breast surgeon at Mercy,"

"Brie baby," I felt my breath come out in slow breaths, "I need you Troy,"

"I'm getting the first flight home okay?" I blinked as I felt my fingers shake, "I'm scared Troy,"

"I know you are Brie,"

My body was breaking down as I felt tears fall off my cheeks. "It's okay Brie, I'll be home by tonight hopefully and we can face it together okay?" I nodded my head as I felt my cheeks grow wet. "Can I call you back in a little bit?" he asked, "Yes," I replied, we were both quiet, "Brie, I love you,"

"I love you too Troy,"

After hanging up, I rubbed my fingers over my dad's grave as I got up. I now needed to talk to Taylor who would knock sense in me and tell me what to do next. Pulling my car into her driveway, I knocked on her door and she answered it, "Gabs, hey, what's wrong?"

"Is Chad home?" I asked softly, "Yea,"

"I need to talk to both of you, I know Chad is going to know soon because well Troy is probably freaking out." Taylor looked at me, "Gabi you are scaring me," I stuffed my hands in my pockets as I just nudged my head, "Please,"

"Alright come on, let's go to the dining room," I buzzed through her house as she called for Chad. I sat down as I played with my thumbs. Taylor then came to sit next to me, "Gabs, sweetie," Taylor touched my shoulder as I pressed my palms into my eyes.

"I had my first mammogram this morning," I told her softly, "A mamo what?" Chad asked, Taylor rolled her eyes, "Basically it takes pictures of your breasts Chad,"

"What? Why did I never know of this job?" I rolled my eyes as Taylor smacked him gently, "And?" she asked me, "They wanted me to do a ultrasound after that, I just thought it went with the process, after that, I was told to fucking wait for my results. Who fucking waits anymore?" I asked, Taylor's eyes softened, "Gabi," I shook my head as I bit on my lip, "Apparently I have eight lesions, which are tumors, four in each breasts," I replied numbly, "Tomorrow morning I have to get a biopsy done along with an MRI,"

"Gabi sweetie," I wrapped my arms around Taylor as I held on to her for a moment. Chad put his hand on my back, "I'm scared," I whispered, "Have you talked to Troy?" I nodded my head as I pulled back, "What am I going to tell the kids? I mean," Taylor rested her hand on my shoulders, "Take a deep breath," she whispered, "It's going to be okay. Don't tell the kids anything until you know what's going on okay?"

"Taylor, I don't know what to do,"

"Go home, drink a big glass of wine and play and hang out with your children. Once Troy get's home, you will do everything together as a family."

I took a small breath, "The kids need to be seen getting on the bus tomorrow at eight, I have to be at the hospital to meet with the surgeon by eight."

"I'll come over tomorrow morning," Chad spoke up; I gave a faint nod as I took a deep breath. "I better be getting home, the kids are probably wondering."

"It's going to be okay," Taylor, told me squeezing my arm, "Thanks Tay," I whispered softly, Chad pulled me into his arms as I buried my face into his chest. "I'm assuming Troy is on his way home."

"Yea, you will probably be getting a call from him soon." Chad nodded as he rested his chin against my head. "It's gonna be alright Gabs,"

"Thanks,"

They gave me smiles as I got myself together; Alexa saw me walk through and she smiled, "Hi Aunt Gabi,"

"Hi Alexa, how was school today?"

"Good!"

"That's fantastic," I told her with a smile, "Are you alright?" she asked me, "Of course, just a rough day."

Taylor and Chad saw me out as I waved; I got into the car as I had more reassurance since the beginning of this day.

"Guys, your dad is coming home early tonight," I told them softly, "His meetings are over," the kids all looked at me surprised, all of them eating either a taco or a burrito, "Wow, that was fast,"

"Yes, he will be landing late tonight and we have to go somewhere tomorrow in the morning. So Wes and Allison, Chad will be coming over to make sure you get on the bus okay and Lo, are you okay with staying with Uncle Chad and Taylor?" She nodded her head with a smile, "Good!"

"Is everything okay mom? You seem off today?" Liam asked his eyes looked over me, as Troy would have done. "I'm fine Liam,"

"I don't believe you," he responded, my jaw tightened, "Liam, it's okay, I'm fine. I just found some stuff out today that was a little disturbing. I'm not quite ready to talk about it with everybody yet so we are going to drop this conversation."

Liam shook his head as he took a few bites of his food, my stomach churned, as I didn't want to eat. I sucked it up and had a burrito for the kid's sake. They all ate as Liam had dishes for the evening. He helped clean up everybody as Wes and Emma both went to take showers. Lo and Allison went to play in the living room until bedtime as they both didn't have to take a shower tonight.

"Mom,"

"Liam," I said, my eyes looking at his, "Everything is fine. I promise you. It's all fine,"

"Are dad's meetings really all over?"

"Yes," I responded looking at him, "What's going on tomorrow at eight?" I took a deep breath as I looked at him, "Liam, sweetie, I don't need you to worry about anything okay? It's just a stupid doctors appointment. I promise you I'm healthy."

He closed his eyes, "If that's your story,"

"Liam," he looked up, "What?"

"I need you to be okay and not question what's going on right now, okay? I don't need Emma and Wes worrying, I don't need them freaking out over nothing, can you please do that for me?"

"Yea," he finally said, "Are you sure you are okay?" I gave another nod, "I'll tell you when I'm not okay, okay?" he nodded his head and I went over to kiss his forehead, "It's okay, I promise,"

"Okay, I understand,"

I nodded as I went to get Allison and Lo ready for bed; we brushed their teeth and got them into pajamas. Lauren went to the bathroom as I cuddled up with her to read a book, She flipped the pages and I read the small and short sentences to her. Her eyes became heavy as the clock flipped past eight.

I tucked her into the bed and kissed her forehead. "Night baby girl, I'll see you in the morning. I love you,"

"I love you too mommy,"

A smile crossed my face as I went to Allison's room who was picking through a picture book, she looked up at me and I smiled, "What's up?" I asked her, "Nothing, Liam seemed upset at dinner though and I don't know why," she expressed towards me, I sighed, "Liam is worried about mommy but there is nothing to be worried about okay? I just have a doctor's appointment in the morning. That's all."

"Like to check for a booboo?" I nodded, "Exactly, but I shouldn't have any so it should be easy," I told her, I swept her hair behind her ears as she smiled, "Good, I don't want my mommy to have any booboos," I smiled as I swallowed a painful lump down my throat, "Good, I don't want any booboos," I kissed her forehead as she laid down, I turned off the light and my stomach was rocked from her words.

"Good night mom," Wes came over to hug my waist, "Night sweetie," I told him, I kissed the top of his head, and "I love you,"

"I love you too mom,"

He went off towards his room as Liam came up the stairs, "Night," he said as he slipped into the nearby bathroom, "Night Liam," he shut the door as I took a breath, going into Emma's room, she looked up as she shut her book. "Alexa said you were at Uncle Chad and Taylor's house today, she said you seemed upset,"

"It's nothing sweetie, I just had a really rough day. That's all."

"Are you sure mom?" I nodded as I sat down next to her, "That's all." She looked at me and she then crawled over to rest her head in my lap. "You know you can tell me," she said, I bit down hard on my lip as I told myself that it was better to have all of the information first.

"Too bad I don't have anything to tell," I told her quietly, "Once I do have information to tell you, I will, I promise."

"Nothing is wrong with you right?" She asked, her eyes looking into mine, "Of course not, I mean, not that I am aware of." I told her, "I just have a routine doctors appointment tomorrow morning, that is all."

"If you say so,"

I brushed my fingers through her hair as she played with my shorts. "You're beautiful mom, have I ever told you that?" she brought me out of my trace as I looked at her, "Yea, a couple of times," she smiled at me, "You truly are, I see lots of moms at our school and none of them look half as good as you do."

"Thanks," I told her with a smile, "You and dad are awesome together," she paused and looked at me, she then sat up quickly, "Nothing is wrong with you and dad right? You guys aren't fighting and getting a divorce?" my eyes rose and I let a small laugh fall out of my mouth, "That is the last thing happening Emma, I love your dad and nothing will ever change that, not a fight, not a bad day, your dad and I will not be getting a divorce." She relaxed as she laughed, "Good, I don't think I could have handled that, I mean you guys kiss all the time."

I shook my head as I laughed, "Yea, I guess we do."

"Is he your prince charming?" she asked me, I paused, "Yes, he is,"

"I want to find a prince charming just like daddy," she whispered, her words becoming lost as she was entering dreamland. "I hope you find somebody perfect for you Em's." I kissed her forehead as I moved out from beneath her.

"I love you Em,"

"I love you too mom,"

She snuggled with her blankets as I shut her lights off. I walked out of her room as I went to change into a t-shirt and shorts; I tucked my hair behind my ears as I went downstairs. Liam was sitting on the couch doing homework, "You should be getting to bed soon, it's almost nine thirty,"

"I'll be okay, I wanted to see dad before I went to bed."

"Okay," I responded, "I'm going to finish cleaning up the kitchen and get ready for bed myself,"

"If you were going to wait up for dad too that's fine," Liam said, he propped his head up to look at me, I closed my eyes and I nodded, "Yea, I will,"

I sent a text to Troy of the story I told the kids and what was happening tomorrow so he was caught up.

I cleaned the kitchen as I got a text back from Troy. He was on his way home from the airport. My stomach clenched, as I wasn't ready to face him because once I did, I was going to burst into tears.

"I think I am going to go to bed mom, I'm pretty beat and I thought dad was getting home sooner."

"Oh, yea, he had a delay at the airport."

"Yea, so I am going to go to bed. Night, I love you,"

"I love you too," I told him, I watched him retreat to the room next to Wesley's. My stomach clenched as I had a glass of wine, I circled it as I waited for Troy to arrive, I heard the garage door open and I moved back but I stopped when I heard Liam's voice.

"Is mom okay?"

"She is fine, why?" Troy responded, "She is acting funny, that's all. She keeps telling us that she is fine and only has a normal doctors appointment tomorrow morning,"

"That's the truth, so I don't know what you want from her."

"She doesn't seem fine!" Liam protested, "Liam, if something was wrong, we would tell you at the right time. Right now, there is nothing wrong with her she is fine. I promise,"

"Were those really all of your meetings?"

"Yes," Troy spoke up, "That was all of them, instead of waiting to get a later flight home, I jumped on the next one." Liam sighed, "Liam, bud, it's going to be okay. I promise, nothing is wrong."

"Okay," he said softly, "She had a little bit of a bad day with an email her mom sent her and it probably upset her a bit. Don't read too much into it okay?"

"Okay, thanks dad,"

"No problem,"

"Are the Lakers excited to have you back in some form?" Troy laughed, "Yea, they are,"

"That's good,"

"Go to bed, I'll talk to you tomorrow morning okay?"

"Okay, night dad. Love you,"

"Love you too,"

Troy's footsteps came up the stairs as he turned and walked towards the light. His eyes caught mine and I felt the tears instantly. He dropped his bag and then scooped me into a big hug. My feet leaving the ground as I pressed my face into his neck. "Shh, Liam is still awake." His words were quiet as I blinked, "Come on," he grabbed my hand and he gently took me upstairs.

He shut the lights off and when we got into our room, he went into the bathroom, turned on the shower and then I burst into loud sobs. Troy held me close to his chest as I cried for the first time that day like this.

"I'm so scared," I whispered, "Me too," Troy said softly, I wrapped my arms around his neck as we stayed in this embrace for some time. "Do you feel okay?" Troy asked me, the question awkward, "I feel fine," I told him, "Nothing feels un-normal besides the words in my head."

Troy brushed his fingers through his hair, "You freaked Liam out,"

"I thought I played happy mom and then he brought something up over dinner which freaked all of the kids out."

"He can read you almost as well as I can," I nodded, "I know, so I had to convince him I am fine and I overheard your conversation." Troy wiped a tear away as he kissed my forehead. His hands locking with mine, "We will be okay, the kids will be okay, we need to have all of our answers before you can talk to the kids."

"Troy what if it's cancer?" I asked, tears welling up in my eyes again, he sighed softly as he brushed a strand of my hair away, "Then we will fight it together," he said, I felt my lip quiver as he pulled me towards him.

His hand resting on the back of my head as he pressed me close. "I love you Brie, I love you so much,"

"I don't know,"

"You don't know if you love me?" he questioned, I couldn't help but laugh as he smiled, "No, I know I love you Troy,"

"Oh, okay, good,"

I couldn't help but smile as he gave me a big smile, "It's going to be okay," he whispered, "We are going to be okay,"

I laughed as Emma showed me the video, "It was good and I couldn't help but laugh." I nodded, "It was funny," I looked at her half eaten plate, "Finish your food,"

"Liam!" I yelled, "I'm coming," he grumbled, he made it to the top step as he entered the kitchen; he grabbed a muffin and a water bottle. "Someone looks tired," Emma mentioned, "I didn't get much sleep last night," he admitted, "Look, my beautiful children," Troy entered the room as he had just got out of the shower. Emma smiled as she went over to hug him.

"I'm glad you're home so soon,"

"Me too," Troy admitted, Liam looked between the two of us as we gave him a big smile. My stomach twisted as Liam sighed, "I have practice after school today and then I'll be home," Troy gave a simple nod, "Sounds good,"

"Good morning!"

"Uncle Chad!" he walked in with three coffees in hand, I smiled at him and he winked, "Thanks!" Troy said slipping ours out of the holder. He smoothed it into my hands as he kissed my temple. "Thanks,"

"Well Emma and I are leaving for school,"

Emma hugged me, "Have a good day mom,"

"You too Emma, have a good day Liam, I mean it," he gave me a smile, "Okay," I went over and hugged him, "I promise, there is nothing to worry about okay?"

"Fine, Dad said there isn't anything either so I guess it's fine," I smiled as my hands smoothed over his chest. "Thank you, now go learn!" they laughed as they walked out of the door, Allison and Wes came running through the kitchen. "Daddy!" they both attacked him as Troy laughed wrapping his arms around their little bodies, "I missed you guys too," they both laughed as they said hi to Chad. "Good morning mommy!" I hugged Wes as he smiled, "Go get ready for school," I said directing him, "You have a good day at school too okay?"

He nodded before he went downstairs to get ready, Allison had her blanket as I smiled, and I squatted to be in front of her, "No booboos okay?" I smiled as Troy looked at me, "Exactly, no booboos," I gave her a high five and a hug as I kissed her forehead.

"Have a good day in Kindergarten okay?" she smiled as I squeezed her hand, she went off to put on the clothes I set out for her. Her hair was perfect just as it was. "I'm going to tell Lo we are leaving,"

"I'll come with you," Troy set his coffee cup down as I did too. We both went up the stairs and into Lo's room. She was still cuddled up as I crawled into the bed next to her, "Good morning beautiful," she grinned as she woke up and the first thing she saw was Troy. She grinned and she bounced up as she wrapped her arms around Troy. "Hi sweetie," he kissed her cheek and she then turned to hug me.

"Uncle Chad is downstairs, after Allison and Wes leave for school you are going to go hang out with him okay?" She nodded as I kissed the back of her head, "Do you need to go to the bathroom?" she nodded her head, Troy let her down and she went running to the bathroom, "I'll help her,"

"Okay," I grabbed a pair of sweats and a t-shirt for her to wear for the day. Chad came in the room and I showed him, "If you don't want to do it, stuff it in the diaper bag and just have Taylor change her. Ask her if she wants to go to the bathroom every hour, it's mostly every other hour but she needs to at least think about it."

"Got it, I have potty trained before,"

"I know, I know," I ran my fingers through my hair, "Thanks," I mentioned, "No problem,"

"Mommy! I need help!" I moved past as I went to Allison, "My hair!" she complained, "Do you want me to put it into a pony tail?"

"Yes please!"

I sat her down as I brushed her hair back into a ponytail. I wrapped it up tight as I kissed her cheek, "Do you have a jacket?" I asked looking at her jeans and t-shirt. "No, can you get me one please,"

"Sure," I grabbed a sweatshirt and I handed it to her, "Please eat all of your breakfast. Your lunch is already in your backpack."

"Okay, thank you!" I nodded as she went on, I checked over Wes's outfit and I pushed my fingers through his hair, "I'll see you this afternoon,"

"Okay!"

Troy looked at me, his eyes set, "Are you ready?" he asked, I nodded as I wrapped my arms around my body. "Let's go," he grabbed my hand as I grabbed my coffee, "Thanks again Chad, we will call you later."

"Have fun," I rolled my eyes as Troy lead me down to his car. I took seat into his Audi and he went to the other side. He reached over for my hand as he drove away from the house. I let my guard down as I let my head drop slightly, "Hey, hey, none of that. Keep your head up beautiful,"

I looked over at him and he smiled, "Come on, we have to look as if everything is a big misunderstanding until told otherwise, you'll be fine,"

"I haven't had anything wrong with me since that stupid car accident,"

"Let's keep it that way okay?"

I nodded with a sigh, "Okay," he smiled as he focused on driving. It was a little bit of a drive but we pulled in ten minutes early. Troy gripped my hand as we went to her floor and checked in. My breathing picked up and Troy smoothed his fingers over my knee, "Take a deep breath, relax," he whispered, "It's okay," I rested my head on his shoulder; I had to fill out a boatload of paperwork as I returned it.

We waited about ten minutes until we were called back. It was rare for everything to be on time.

We were greeted into an office where all of my scans were posted, circled spots as my stomach twisted. "Gabi, Dr. Trisha Mills, a breast surgeon," I nodded as she smiled, "I presume this is your husband?" I nodded, "Troy," he introduced himself as I took a calm breath. He sat in the chair next to me as she Dr. Mills smiled.

"I have gone of your scans and ultrasounds, we are a little concerned with a few things, and do you mind if I did an examination myself?" I shook my head as she shut the door, locking it as I stripped my shirt and sports bra off.

Troy's eyes went directly to my breasts, as I suddenly felt self-conscious. Troy must have noticed as his eyes carried to mine and he reached for my hand. He gently squeeze and his eye hold made me feel ten times better.

"Yes, I would love for us to do a biopsy and a MRI today. I can do the biopsy myself right now and then we can have you do an MRI at eleven thirty," I swallowed, "Okay," I said softly, "I'm going to take two samples from each side, you have two bigger tumors in each breast and then smaller ones." She pointed them out on the screen, "With the small ones, we are going to do a Fine Needle and with the larger ones a large core," I blinked up as I looked up at her.

As if she was reading my mind she smiled, "You won't feel a thing, we will give you a dose of lidocaine," I smiled softly, "The producer will take about twenty to thirty minutes. Troy can sit in here and wait for you or in the waiting room, wherever he would like." I swallowed, "Will she come here first?" Troy asked, Dr. Mills looked over at him, "Yes,"

"Then I'll stay in here,"

I took a deep breath as she stood up, "Let me get everything set up and I'll be back in here in a minute to grab out." I nodded as I slipped my shirt over my head, I blinked away tears as Troy stood up and wrapped his arms around me. "It's okay," he whispered into my ear, "Everything will be okay, you just have to remember that," I nodded, as I couldn't seem to find words.

"Gabi, we will take you back there now," Troy stepped back as he kissed my forehead, "Go kick ass," I smiled as I stood up and they lead me back to a small room. I stripped my shirt off as they had me lay on my back and I stared up into bright lights.

They put a blood pressure cuff around my arm and a heart rate monitor over my finger. Over the years, my kids had broken bones. They had simple surgeries and they all scared me. Liam had his whole brain tumor which still scared the fuck out of my thinking, Emma had her appendix removed, Wes had two broken bones in his foot that had to be reset, Allison had her appendix taken out already and we were still waiting on Lo.

"We are going to numb the area, you might feel a few pinches since we are doing two of them," she said in a comforting voice, I nodded, I struggled to keep my emotions in check as after a couple of minutes were they doing an ultrasound over top of me.

"This will help me guide towards the spots just so we hit them dead on okay?" I nodded as I looked into the lights. I tried to just relax as I couldn't feel anything, I only heard them requesting certain needles and marking different things.

My stomach twisted and curved as they did the producer. I only had a small breakfast of eggs and an orange with my coffee Chad provided. "Are you doing okay Gabi?" I nodded, "I'm okay,"

"Good," she smiled at me as I felt my stomach dive again, "You are doing well, and just one more and we will be done."

"Okay," I closed my eyes as suddenly the light above me went off; they took my blood pressure cuffs off and the heart rate monitor. "We are going to have you sit up slow okay?" I nodded as I had help from somebody to slip my shirt back on.

I sat up as I had a slight head rush, "You did good," Dr. Mills said washing her hands, "Did it…"I paused, "Look okay?" I asked, she smiled, "I'm not the pathologist," I knew that something was wrong from those words she spoke. "When will I know," I responded, "I will make an appointment to see you tomorrow morning at eight okay?" I struggled to breath as I nodded my head, "Okay,"

"We are going to take you back to the room to just monitor you for a bit and then we will let you go grab some food before you go to your MRI okay?" I nodded as they wheeled me back to the room.

"Dad just keep an eye on him okay?" Troy's voice paused, "I'll explain everything later okay?"

Once I appeared, he told his dad he had to go and he smiled, "There is my rock star," I gave him a faint smile as they let me crawl up onto the bed by myself but Troy had to assist. "She did good, I expect to have the results back by late tonight so an eight am appointment tomorrow morning?" Troy nodded, "Yes, that will be perfect." Once they all left, Troy came to sit next to me his lips found my temple.

"What were you talking to Jack about?"

"To keep an eye on Liam, make sure he is in school, make sure he is okay, he is pretty worried," I smiled as I closed my eyes, "Did it hurt?" he asked, I shook my head, "Not a little bit," I replied, "Good," Troy kissed me softly and he held my hand as we waited about twenty minutes and they came in as they smiled, "You are all set to go," I put my bra back on and Troy grabbed my hand.

"Well we have about two hours to burn," Troy mentioned, I nodded as he gripped my hand, "Hey," I looked at him as tears welled up in my eyes, "She didn't say it looked like nothing, she didn't say I have nothing to worry about, she didn't say that it went well, she said I'm not the pathologist." Troy's mouth shifted and he couldn't think of anything us but to pull me close.

"I'm sorry baby girl,"

"No," I said shaking my head, "It was probably a good thing,"

"Maybe," Troy said, his fingers wrapped around mine as his blue eyes held mine. "What do you want to do?"

"I want you to hold me," I whispered, Troy took a big breath, "Alright, come on," he said, he took me out to the car as we drove away, I turned out of the window, my tears building. Troy pulled up to the house, as we had to be gone by eleven.

It was only nine thirty, "Come on,"

When we got into the house, Troy guided me upstairs as we lay down in the bed and I curled in his arms. We didn't move for what felt like a very long time, his arms keeping me close.

His warm arms keeping me close, "What did you tell them?" I asked, "That you had something come up and you needed me at home. I told them I would get back to them in a few days. My job is secured because they know you don't drag me away for nothing, I mean, hell, I didn't come home for a broken bone because you told me not too, they know when I mean business so they let me go. I will have to correspond through email,"

"Okay,"

"The only thing I had to do was the training," I nodded as tears well in my eyes, I gripped onto his arm as he glanced down, he held me a whole lot tighter as I began to cry in his arms again.

He kissed my cheek as the tears slipped down my cheeks, "You're beautiful and strong, I know whatever the hell is going on, that you will beat it, I know you Gabi, I know you," he brushed my hair away as he kissed me, Troy glanced over my shoulder, "Do you want something to eat before we go?" he asked, I shook my head, "Not really,"

"How about we split a sandwich?" he suggested, I knew he wanted me to eat something so I only nodded my head, "That's fine," he whispered, "Do you want to go downstairs with me or do you want to stay here,"

"I'll go with you," I told him, "Alright, come on," he held my hand down the stairs as he kissed my temple, I settled in a bar stool and Troy made us a sandwich to split in half. I smiled as I took a few bites, "What are we going to tell the kids?" I asked looking at him, "The facts," Troy stated, "What we know and what's going to happen. They will probably be scared and upset but it will be okay. We will leave it open for them to talk to us."

"Okay," I breathed as it was five till eleven, "We should probably go," I said softly, "Alright, and do you have everything you need?" I nodded as I took a drink of my water and we got back into the car.

The drive to the hospital was filled with music and pulling into the parking lot, I got out as Troy held my hand, we walked to radiology and signed in, filled out more papers as I had three MRI's before this.

Two on my knee and one on my ankle, I sighed softly, Troy turned in the paperwork as it wasn't long until I was called back. We went through blood pressure and stuff like that, made sure I didn't have any metal on, or any devices in my body.

"Alright, the radiologist will come back in a few moments to grab you and we will be set." I nodded as Troy rubbed my knee, "Just think, you can go home after this and it will be okay, we will have dinner as a family,"

"That will be filled with questions,"

"That we will answer with as much honesty as possible,"

"We have to talk to Liam,"

"It's killing you isn't it," I nodded my head, "It is,"

"Well, it will be okay, one more day of him waiting won't kill either of you. He needs to trust us." I nodded my head as he gripped my hand, "If we found out anything big, we will tell them all after dinner tomorrow," he whispered into my ear, "It gives them time for questions and we aren't rushed by anything. We can put Lo down and talk to her more one on one because she won't understand much."

"Okay,"

He kissed my temple, "Gabi, we are ready for you," I slipped my shoes off and left my stuff with Troy as they guided me back to the machine. "The test will be about thirty to forty minutes alright?" I nodded my head and they positioned me the right way and they went over everything.

"Can I listen to music or something?" I asked, he nodded, "What Pandora station would you like?" he asked, I closed my eyes as I thought about it, "You know what, you can pick," I told him, he nodded with a smile, "Fair deal, at least tell me what type,"

"Alternative," I told him, "Good choice," I nodded as he gave me a blanket and then he pressed the button, the headphones positioned over my ears as I shut my eyes as music began to fill the headphones and the machine began to make the most obnoxious noise ever.

"Gabi," I let my eyes open as the radiologist, Tom, was standing over me, I blinked shaking my head as he smiled, "All done," I sat up carefully as he gave me a smile, "Thanks," I responded, he guided me back into the waiting area, Troy was playing on his phone as Tom cleared his throat causing Troy to look up. "She did well, she actually fell asleep on me,"

I laughed as Tom smiled, "Good, thank you," Troy said as I slipped my shoes back on, Troy pulled me down into his lap and I smiled leaning into him. "Are you alright?" he asked, "I'm okay," I responded to him, "Good, let's go,"

Troy put the last of the steaks down as everybody began to grab theirs, I mean the older kids. I cut up some for Lauren and Allison as I split them between two different plates. They grabbed the twice-baked potatoes and corn as they began to sit around the table.

Giving the younger kids their food, I made my own, and Troy kissed the back of my head as he went to grab his food. He moved around as he settled into the table as I followed. My breasts were sore after everything was said and done.

"So mommy, how did your doctors appointment go?" I smiled at Allison and I grinned, "It couldn't have gone better,"

"So no booboos?" she asked me, I shook my head, "No booboos, I did have to have a shot though, but I was fine," I replied, she nodded, "I don't like those very much," I giggled, "I don't like them very much either."

"How was school?" Troy asked the mumbled replies of good and okay were spread over the table. "Lo, how was Uncle Chad's and Aunt Taylors?"

"Fun!"

Troy smiled as I ate most of my dinner, "I'll do dishes tonight," I told the group, a cheer went among the group. Troy gave me a quick glance, Liam followed and then the two looked at each other.

"Guys, Uncle Chad is going to come over tomorrow morning again to help out, Lo, you don't mind right?"

"Right!"

"Wait, again?" Liam asked, his arm flexed as his jaw tightened, "Yea, again," I said eyeing him, "Are you going to say that dad has this appointment now," Troy and I shared a glance as Liam's outburst was going too far, "Liam, please," I said softly, "We can talk after dinner okay?"

"Fine,"

He finished eating his dinner and once he was done, he excused himself and went to his room. His door closing noisily behind him, Emma looked at me and I nodded as she went after him to make sure he was okay.

I began to clear the table and Troy stopped me, "I'll do it tonight alright?" I eyed him, "Go talk to Liam, tell him what you want but he needs to talk to you," I nodded as Troy kissed my forehead.

I began to head downstairs as Emma was coming up, "He is upset," she told me with a sigh, "He doesn't believe you and dad," I swallowed, "Thanks sweetie,"

"Everything is alright mom? I mean two doctors appointments and it's strange,"

"Just getting the clean bill of health tomorrow," I told her, "That's it,"

She smiled, "Good,"

I went down as she went up; I softly knocked on Liam's door. I could hear his music from my point, "Liam, come on, let's talk,"

He opened his door and I walked in, he turned his music down as he turned towards me, I could see how upset he was. "Mom, what are you not telling me? I need to know," I hugged him as he was taller than me but I still hugged him like a mom. "It's fine Liam,"

"You and dad are both hiding something from me!" he argued, "Tomorrow, I will be getting the full story of whatever the hell is going on okay? Tomorrow, after dinner, everybody will know what has been going on these past two days,"

Liam closed his eyes tightly, "I'm scared," he admitted, "I'm scared too Liam but I need you and I to be brave for those kids out there okay? They are scared too and they are going to need their big brother to help them not be scared anymore. Your dad and I will be here for you but right now, this is a lot of what ifs, we want to know everything before we freak you guys out over nothing, tomorrow," I promised him, he looked at me and he took a big breath.

"Okay,"

"It's going to be okay," I told him, he nodded, "I just need a minute,"

"That's fine, take however many minutes you want. Tomorrow after dinner, you will know, I know how upsetting this is to you because you don't know and I'm scared because I do know that something isn't right. I just have to know everything okay?"

"Okay," he said, "Let's keep that between us okay? Let's keep that mommy is going to be okay so they aren't freaking out tomorrow during school alright?" Liam nodded and I hugged him again, "I love you Liam, I wouldn't keep this from you unless I knew I needed to wait."

"Alright," his voice shook and I ran my fingers through his hair, "Can I talk to dad?" I nodded, "I'll send him down,"

Going back upstairs, I went over to Troy as I whispered into his ear; Troy shut off the water and dried his hands, "Okay,"

I ended up finished the dishes, Emma and Wes both came to give me a hug before they went off to bed. I kissed the top of their heads and told them I loved them. Going to Lo's room, I read her another story and she fell asleep clutched my finger.

"Allison," she stopped as she was dancing around her room, a grin falling onto her face. "I was dancing!" I smiled, "I could see that!" I went over as I tucked her into bed, "Mommy, you said no booboos right?"

"Yea, no booboos,"

"Good, Liam was sad again though,"

I pushed some of her hair back, "Liam is just worried, that's all, and he is fine. I promise."

"Okay,"

"Daddy will probably come say goodnight in a few minutes okay,"

"Alright,"

"I love you Alli,"

"I love you too mommy,"

I went out as Troy was coming in, I started to say something but he shook his head, "I'll tell you in a minute,"

"Okay,"

Going up to our room, I changed my clothes and crawled onto the bed.

Troy came in five minutes later as he took his shirt off and crawled into bed next to me. "So?"

"He wanted to know if you were going to be okay,"

"And?"

"I told him that you were going to be fine,"

"Anything else?"

"He just explained how worried he is and that he sees that something is wrong,"

"He is too much like his father,"

"That he is but I think he is going to take it the hardest if it is what it might be," I sighed and rolled closer to Troy, "If it is though, we have a ton of Bolton's here to back you up," I smiled and then it faltered, "How the hell am I going to tell Sharpay? She doesn't even have a clue,"

"Tomorrow, after we find out we can let everybody else know,"

"I don't want the kids to be last,"

"Of course not," Troy replied, "But tomorrow, I think we will owe a visit to Sharpay, my parents, and Taylor and them to tell them. After that, we will tell the kids and whom ever else." I swallowed, "How the hell do I tell my mom?"

"Email,"

"Probably," I sighed and Troy pulled me close, "But let's not worry about that now okay? Right now, it's a bunch of what if's."

"A bunch of what ifs," I responded, Troy kissed me softly and he shut off the lights as we crawled into bed.

I know many of you know where this is headed and I warned you back in My Laker Boys that you were not going to like it but it's the plot of the story, it's about seeing the Bolton's get through this as a family, how to they support and love each other. That's what this story is about. It's about being brave. So hang in there with me everybody! I'll make it the best story it can possible be.

So the other day, one of my readers pointed out that a girl was copying my story and posting it to a Justin Bieber site just changing the names of the characters. She was doing it to My Laker Boyfriend, so I do not appreciate that and I hope nobody else will steal my stories. I don't own the characters or the HSM series but the story is my story. My words. So please and Thank you don't do that!

Thanks for all of the reviews and happy birthdays!

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