Chapter Nineteen: Memories, Part Two; Will the World End in Blood?
On my twelfth birthday, I was transformed into a kishin.
Oh, that glorious blood.
A witch and her son had targeted me because I inherited the ability to transform into a weapon from my mother, a woman who I spent my life hating after she left me to atone with her 'sins'.
The upper half of my body emerged from the thick, spiked blade that swung effortlessly in Kaden's hands. Reaching out, I grabbed a passing villager and plunged my hand into their chest, ripping their bloody soul out and swallowing it whole.
The witch, however, used an ancient spell called Shea Futan that created a forced resonance between her son and me, causing both of us to share the kishin power that stemmed from my soul.
Suddenly there was pain in Kaden's thigh, as if he'd been stabbed. We whipped around, my plunging back into my blade and prickling my spikes like a porcupine. In front of us were a young woman and a man, both watching in disdain. As I realized they weren't attacking, I leapt out of Kaden's hands and flashed into a crouching position. My pale skin had taken on a metallic silver pallor, my grey eyes lightening with streaks of red. I sneered with bloody teeth.
I hadn't ever known what I was. No one had ever thought to track my mother down, even though she was one of the few Death Weapons in the world, and it hadn't been until we had already destroyed the entire town and killed nearly all the villagers that someone showed up.
"Tristan, it's time." The woman said, holding her hand out. I watched curiously as the man hesitated, looking at me. Me?
"Amanda, that's her daughter!"
The woman looked back at him, frowning before pointing at me with a sad smile. "She's gone, Tristan. She's not human anymore."
I wasn't human anymore?
Don't ask me what it was.
I had to be still human!
In fact, don't bother asking anyone.
I realized what I had done and the horror struck me to my knees.
All I know is that…
Dammit, how do I get rid of it?
When Amanda Roades and her weapon, Tristan Gordon, came to exterminate Kaden and I?
Take it all!
I forced the kishin out of me.
"Oh my god, look!"
I whimpered suddenly, rolling onto my back and writhing as the pain of shifting bones and sheathing blades ran through me again. Somewhere nearby I could hear Kaden screaming. All I could comprehend was the pain and the sudden, startling strength inside myself: I didn't want to be this way! I didn't want hate to follow me around like this!
I gasped, feeling a cool hand on my forehead as I struggled to resurface from the evil that surrounded me. "Help me," gasping, I reached out. "I want… I want to be human!"
As if it was the last straw, my will pulled me through with a scream tearing from my throat. I pushed off the ground, digging my normal, human nails into the dirt as the last of the demon was pushed out of me. Someone was stroking my hair, just saying "Oh my god!" over and over again like a mantra. There had never been I time where I could have cared less. I felt almost normal again, nearly human.
Two weeks later, I woke up in the DWMAA.
It had been four years since I had, through strength of will and the stupidity of a witch's spell, been saved by Ms. Roades and taken to the DWMA. Since then I had taken my anti-madness pills like a good little girl, done everything they asked so that someday I could atone for what I'd done. I would never forget the day they took me back to the town I grew up to see that wreckage I'd caused. I would never forget the drifting white sheets that covered the cold bodies. My stomach had rejected food for nearly a weak afterwards.
Now, it was all coming back. My fingers turned to steal daggers, bending in the middle where the joints were. My teeth grew into fangs, my pupils lengthening and shifting until one was horizontal and the other vertical slits. Screaming, I felt the metal spikes stab out of my back with a violent tearing sound. Too soon, however, the pain was over and the metamorphosis complete. I stumbled, choking on the sheer amount of maddening power that enveloped my soul. Shudders kept assaulting my body as my soul, though already damaged, tried to reject the change.
I didn't have enough strength this time.
Tears dripped down my face even as the madness took over, an unearthly smile gracing my face as I slowly dropped into a crouch. My kishin was more comfortable this way, I realized, though she didn't know why. She inspected those who stood in front of her silently while I observed, barely even fighting. While I had been barely holding her back for years, she had been able to save up her energy for this moment. Trying to fight against her control was like beating against a stone wall with only your fists. I just wanted to scream, seeing the look of betrayal on Black*Star's face as he stared with wide eyes. Brie looked just as shocked and her grip on Soul was too loose. None of them were prepared and as soon as I realized this so did the Kishin. She sprang forward, using the muscles I had worked on at the DWMAA to launch herself at the defenseless Black*Star.
Someone shouted and my side – her side – lit up in pain. As we howled and rolled away, jumping to our feet with an animalistic snarl, Kid was pulling Black*Star away quickly.
"Kai, dammit, snap out of it!" Black*Star shouted, "You're stronger than this! You can't let a stupid kishin beat you!"
It was too late, I wanted to tell him. Instead, I just sank deeper into despair and darkness at the desperation on his face. After all this fighting and running, I still hadn't gotten to tell him how I felt. The least I could do…
I gathered my energy suddenly, catching the kishin by surprise for a few seconds. I took what I got. I spread my arms wide, gritting my teeth and clenching my fists with the effort, hoping Kid understood what I meant. There was a slight catch in his breath and I could hear a slight choking sound coming from him as he slowly raised Liz and Patty.
"What the hell, Kid, you'll kill her!" Black*Star leapt in front of me, smacking the twin pistols down.
In that moment, I lost control.
Later, when Black*Star looked back on that moment he couldn't really understand what happened. All he could remember was stopping Kid from shooting Kai and suddenly they were traveling on a boat or something. He went in and out of consciousness, drifting through the darkness and wondering where he was and what Kai was doing.
God, Kai. It still made him sick to think of the look on her face before she got surrounded by that red cloud. Fighting a cloud wasn't fair! But, really, Black*Star was struggling with the sense of pain that kept pulsing from his chest. What was this? It made him moan, which he knew Soul would think was really uncool, and it wasn't like the big star at all.
When he woke up for good, he spent a good few moments staring at the ceiling. It was white, clean, and not covered in crack. In no way did it resemble the shack they had been crashing at while in Ester. Groaning, he finally sat up and glanced around the room, and was shocked to realize he knew where he was. Shocked at his discovery, he ignored his aches, got out of bed, and pushed through the curtains into the waiting room of the DWMAA Infirmary.
Sure enough, there were his friends. They all looked like they had bathed recently and were wearing new clothes. Soul had a bit of that spark back in his eye and when he saw his best friend he shot to his feet and crossed the room to him. For a moment Black*Star couldn't even understand what his friend was wanting when he held his hand up as if he wanted to arm-wrestle midair. Usually Black*Star would have been all for random displays of strength, but considering the circumstances he just stared for a brief moment before realizing. The two clasped hands, Soul grinning while the bluenette gave a halfhearted smile in return.
Kid was sitting next to Liz, a single silver pistol lying in his lap. Liz looked determined and a little bit sad, but what surprised Black*Star most was the hand that was held inside Nikolai's larger one. It seemed that the Shinigami's two mismatched weapons had found friends in each other. Something about that made Black*Star sick.
"You were out for a long time," Brie appeared over Soul's shoulder, smiling slightly.
Black*Star nodded and swallowed, managing a slight grin. "Nothing keeps a big star like me down for long."
There was a long silence, deafening as the full reality of his situation struck. Kai was gone. Kai was a kishin and she wasn't going to just come back. Kai had tried to kill him, and nearly had. Black*Star hadn't even for a moment believed that the monster his weapon had become would be able to hurt him. Monsters, however, didn't have a moral code or any values. They didn't care that they had slept side-by-side with someone, stayed up late at night and watching stupid TV shows, trekked through muddy swamps and thick forests together, eaten every meal together. Monsters didn't care that someone had fallen in love with them.
Black*Star, the son of White*Star, the boy whose goal it was to one day defeat god, felt his knees give out as reality crushed him. Not only had he lost his weapon, but he had lost his friend. And not just any friend, but the one that made his chest tighten, his heart act all weird and shit, and made him act like a total prick out of jealousy. Kai was gone, too far for him to ever reach again.
"Oh God," he gasped, a hand gripping his chest.
"Black*Star," Kid started, crossing the room and kneeling by his friend. "There's something I wanted to tell you."
"She's… dead, right?" Black*Star swallowed painfully, "Don't tell me you left her like that. She wouldn't want that. Kai's too good to be stuck like that!"
Death the Kid hesitated, sick to his stomach. The hesitation was all that Black*Star need before rage hit him so strong that his wavelength went haywire. With a ragged, torn yell the powerful assassin's wavelength sprang from him like lightning, lighting up his face with its light. Kid barely twitched as the energy struck him, bearing it as something he deserved. Their friends watched silently. Soul, for one, knew exactly what state of mind his friend had to be in. The only reason the albino scythe was on his feet was what Brie had told him the night before it had all spiraled out of control:
"Maka would want us to fight, you know?"
And fight they would.
"Black*Star," he said quietly.
The bluenette turned, his face streaked with tears. His jaw was clenched, and his pupils were starry.
"This is isn't cool, you know." He started, quickly hurrying on when he noticed the anger in his eyes. "Kai wouldn't want you to give up like this! She would want you to fight Calypso and make sure her life didn't go to waste! She saved us!"
Black*Star faltered, staring up at him. "But… how? How are we going to fight? There's no one but us, Soul! No back up, no Maka and her bravery. What do we have?"
"Dammit!" Soul roughly grabbed his friend by the shoulders and shook him, "You're going to defeat god! Pull yourself together and start acting like you deserve your destiny!"
"I don't have a weapon!" Black*Star pushed him away, standing up on his feet. "How are we going to fight when we barely have a full team?"
Someone cleared their throat behind him as a familiar cranking noise filled the silence.
"I think I can help with that.
(Author's Note: Literally word-vomited this one so that y'all wouldn't have to wait until Monday to read it! I won't be back until then, soo... I hope you like it! As usual: review, favorite, follow! Have a great weekend, ducklings!)