Part IV: The Mystery

Walking in the sand
Thinking of things, adventures in my mind
Tall ships that sail
Across the ocean wide
They won't wait for me
See the way they glide away so gracefully
And with tomorrow what will become of me?
They leave me so much to explain
That's the start of our guessing game

There are times when I think I've found the truth
There are times when I know that I'm wrong
And the days when I try to hide my fears
Bless the days when I'm feeling strong
Bless the days when I'm feeling strong

Wonder why we try so hard
Wonder why we try at all
You wonder why the world is turning around
When in the end it won't matter at all!

She had been prepared for many things. She had known this timeline was completely different, but... not there?

Luna sat with her head drooping on Makoto's guest bed. It was serving as her 'prison' for the time being until The Senshi figured out what to do with her. Appropriately, there was only one window in the room, but it was too high up for a cat to jump up to, and there was no furniture to assist the leap. There was no way to escape for a cat.

Luna didn't want to escape though.

The Senshi had confined her within the room unsure of what to do. They had asked her so many questions, but Luna couldn't...

She had no answers. Not a single clue. How could this timeline be this messed up? How had the paradox been this so broad in its effect? Could... could the whole timeline be rewritten like that? Not just the future? How did that work? She didn't know. Pluto hadn't said anything that would help her. She hadn't known! Luna's heart dropped as she threatened to collapse again.

All of the memories... They would never remember the happiness Luna had with them...

The door opened suddenly, and Luna's head lifted in order to view who had entered the room this time.

"Artemis..." Luna's eyes watered instantly as the white tomcat stood there in front of her and the door shut behind him. She had missed him so much. But... his eyes were hardened as he stood there. Artemis walked into the middle of the room, and he sat down looking up at her. His eyes were not just hardened. They were full of hatred.

"Who are you?" She knew that tone. He was trying to keep his voice calm even though a raging anger was building up inside him. She had only heard this tone a couple of times since knowing him. He so rarely got angry, and never at her. He had been nothing but sweet to her...

Luna looked back down at the covers.

"I was... I am, Serenity's Guardian." She said, and she looked up for an instant to see his frown and anger deepen. "Luna." Luna looked back down at the covers trying to not be affected by his hard gaze. It was just as bad as Usagi's confused and dazed look. She hadn't known Luna at all. Luna had been just a stranger to her best friend... "Just like you are Sailor Venus' Guardian." Artemis' face flushed red and Luna thought he might explode.

"There was only one chosen." He growled trying to contain himself.

"Perhaps... Perhaps that is true." Luna said. "But I remember differently."

"And what would that be?" He asks in a low tone. Luna's heart felt like another sword was being stabbed through it. There had been a time, when he had loved her with a passion, and Luna had ignored him; had chased after others while Artemis had waited for her patiently. Even after their marriage, she had pushed him off a bit. Now she needed him, and he was only full of hatred.

"I remember everything." Luna began. "About our time in The Silver Millennium..." She sighed and looked away again, but this time out the lonely window. "But all of that is gone now." Luna said spreading out on the bed; unable to keep herself together as tears built up in her upward gaze. "I can't even begin to hope for it to come back." She stated with her voice threatening to break. Artemis' muscles tightened and he became more fierce.

"You woke Serenity." He said harshly. "How did you know how to do so? How could you enter The Prayer Room?" Luna looked back at him. She didn't want to discuss this now. She just needed time to grieve her lost past. Couldn't they wait until morning? His eyes were so hard, and hers had darkened in sorrow and grief.

"The Prayer Room was where the bright light led me." Luna said. "That was where I exited The Vortex. Then, I made my way here using The Moon's power to guide me." Luna closed her eyes. She couldn't stand his hatred. "My only thought was to stay by my partners side." She forced herself to look up at him. She needed him to understand. "Just like you did when you awoke from your deep sleep above the Earth." Artemis' face was a deep angry red.

"Where did you come from?" Luna couldn't tell him everything. He wouldn't even believe her if she did.

"From Mau." She said, at least it was true. "Just like you did." He stood up.

"Stop playing games with me!" He demanded. "Who sent you to awaken Princess Serenity? Who are you working for?!" Luna looked away from him for the final time and tears were building up in her eyes as she looked down at the covers completely broken. She could barely whisper her response.

"For the future."

"She has to be working for the enemy!" Artemis cried out angrily.

"Artemis, we must not jump to conclusions too hastily. Acting too quickly would just make things worse." Mercury warned, but it fell on deaf ears as he continued to speak in anger.

"Giving me the run around, not answering any of my question truthfully!" Serenity's head lay on the table again and she flinched at Artemis' hard words. Jupiter's hand continually rubbed against her back soothingly. "She mocks my pain to say she is the other Guardian when there wasn't any!" He shouted.

"What do you mean?" Jupiter asked. "Was there suppose to be another?" Artemis sat there on the table steaming for a moment. There was so much hatred in him at that moment, and Venus had never seen him so riled up before.

"I was chosen out of all the cats on Mau." He said. "Queen Serenity came to Mau in search for advisors. It was a tradition for royalty of other planets to chose Mauians as advisors; always two." He paused. "She lifted up The Silver Crystal and wish... She wished for the chosen advisors to be brought forth. The mark of The Moon was on me since the very beginning." He said. "Imprinted on my Star Seed, and when she called out, it became visible on my forehead. Just like your awakening as Senshi. But, they were soon to find that the other was no where to be found."

"And that doesn't happen I take it." Rei interjected. Artemis nodded.

"Its mocking my loneliness to say she is the other!" He cried and he looked at Usagi who still refused to look upwards at any of them. "And then to say she is Serenity's Guardian, that is even worse!" He fumed. "I was brought to The Moon and everyone believed I would bond with Serenity, but... I didn't." His voice had suddenly dropped to a whisper as he said this. "I bonded with Venus." Venus pet his head gently.

"It'll be okay." She assured him. "We'll figure this out."

"We must deal with her tonight!" He cried out. "She has to work with an enemy! She could be giving away our location right now just by having her with us!"

"I don't think so." Mercury cut it. "They could have come by now. Perhaps in the past few weeks."

"She didn't know the real princess until now! Or even Sailor V's identity when she thought she was the princess!" Artemis stil shouted. "She has to be an enemy!"

"No!" Usagi cried lifting her head suddenly with tears in her eyes. "Just because she lied doesn't mean she is evil! She helped me awaken!"

"You weren't even suppose to be awoken!" Artemis countered.

"I wouldn't have it any other way!" The others could only stare at Usagi as she sat there teary eyed. They all agreed with her, but they also knew Artemis was right. Luna was the only reason any of them had awoken.

"Serenity," Jupiter tried to soothe, but Usagi was already worked up.

"This is Luna!" She cried more desperately this time trying to remind them who they were talking about. Tears streamed down her face steadily. "She helped me! She's been there for me!" Her hot tears were streaking her face red. "She asked me for help, to fix things, I need to trust her!" She was on the verge of sobbing again.

"Usagi-chan, we have to be cautious." Mercury stated, but it was no use. "We don't know her motives yet for sure." Usagi's head fell to the table once more as she sobbed helplessly.

"Lets just end this for tonight." Rei reasoned. "We all need to sleep on it, and think this over! We'll all have cooler heads in the morning." Mercury and Jupiter nodded in agreement. Venus stood unmoving as she watched Artemis continue to boil.

"We have to deal with it now!" He ordered.

"Artemis, you should listen to them." Venus whispered. "I think you need to cool down. You're not yourself." She meant it whole heartedly. The tomcat that sat there on the table was someone she didn't know, and he probably wouldn't either if he looked into the mirror. He was sitting there stammering. He was too angry to even respond reasonably.

"Fine." He said bitterly and jumped down from the table. "I'll go take a walk." Venus moved to follow him. "Please, Mina..." He stopped walking and he spoke without looking back at her. His voice was no longer angry, but heavy and sad. "I just need to be alone for a bit." Venus stopped and watched sadly as he went on alone.

Venus sat on the roof looking up at The Moon and stars above her. A gentle breeze was blowing her hair around her and she sat still transformed. She hadn't been able to bring herself to let it go. The night had been so long and vengeful, could it possibly be done handing out its sorrow? Her eye caught hold of a particular star and she just kept her gaze on that one thing in the night sky. She could imagine it in her mind perfectly. Its foggy surface, Magellan Castle floating above it protectively: Venus. The planet shimmered above her and she let out a sigh. The night had to be done. She couldn't handle any more.

"Hey," Venus looked back to see Mars joining her on the rooftop. She sat down beside her and they looked back up at the sky together. "Are you okay?" Mars' voice broke the silence. Venus looked down at her shoes.

"I guess not." She admitted softly. Mars bit her lip.

"Its okay you know. To let it out." Venus closed her eyes. She couldn't. The tears couldn't come, she had to be strong. "I don't remember you crying back then." Mars whispered. "When Serenity..." The memory sits between them playing out in both of their minds and Serenity's harrowing scream, the one they had just heard replayed tonight at her awakening, echoed in their ears. No, Venus hadn't cried. As the others had fallen to their knees, Venus' anger had been too much. She had rushed forward with her sword held high. To kill that evil creature! Venus' hands tightened as she though about it again. She had kept true to her duty in order to allow the others a moment to collect themselves again. "Always taking the burden from us." Mars' voice was pensive. "I think you can let it go now."

"I can't." Venus argued. "I have to... to be..."

"You can't be solid stone. You wouldn't be a good leader that way." The first tear escaped and drifted down Minako's cheek as she blinked in resistance. It was her first real tear since awakening. She hadn't shed a single tear since then: not with Ace, not with Hikaru, not with Boss, or any other tragedy. She had held them in. Perhaps that was what had lead to her crazy reaction tonight. The second tear glistened at the edge of her eye, and when it fell she closed her eyes in defeat and sucked in a long breath as she struggled to not fall completely apart in front of Mars. Her hand covered here mouth and the other pressed against her cheek as she gasped for air and fought the sobs, but she knew there was no longer any point.

They all knew it now. Ever since her frantic scream when Sailor Moon had been caught. Ever since she had tried to trade herself. Her voice had been cracking and panicked. They knew it, and they had always known it:

Venus was broken.

The only one she had been fooling was herself.

Venus brought her knees in and wrapped her arms around them. She buried her face and hid away from the world as she tried to stifle her sobs that were now racking her body. Mars' arm wrapped around her and she held her close as she cried. Venus's face lifted upwards as she sobbed uncontrollably. She could only cry there in the moonlight as Mars held her in support.

"Its okay." Mars whispered. "Just get it out, and then when done, lift your chin high. You don't have to do it all alone anymore." Venus broke into a fresh new round of deep sobs.

"I missed you all so much!" She sobbed out, and Mars laughed, but Venus could hear that she was crying too.

"Well, you were the baka who kept away from us!" Mars complained through her tears. Venus gasped loudly and she covered her mouth again as she rested her head against Mars' shoulder and she nodded.

"Endymion!"

"Serenity!" Venus sobbed out loud like she had wanted to then. Like the others had then. Mars' arms tightened around her and she tried to silence her own sobs; trying to remain strong for Venus this time. "Why couldn't I protect you?" Venus demanded. "Why can I never protect you?!" Mars let out a sharp gasp as she fought her battle with the tears, and Venus buried her face and continued to cry: Several thousand years worth of tears.

"There we go." Makoto said cheerfully as she revealed her handiwork to Serenity and Ami. The Silver Crystal dangled from a chain now and Makoto lifted it up for the two of them to admire. Usagi's head was no longer on the table, but she still looked downwards at her hands sitting on her lap. Makoto and Ami had let their transformations go hoping it would encourage Usagi to do the same, to let Serenity go, but so far they had no luck. Makoto put the chain around Usagi's neck and it lay gently against her chest now. "Now why don't we do something about that hair now?" Makoto asked as she made her way into the kitchen and returned a moment later with a pair of scissors. She took the two dangos out of her hair and let the hair cascade around Usagi's face and she brushed it down her back. They sat in silence with only the sound of Makoto cutting away at Usagi's hair. Usagi simply sat with a blank stare, and Ami sat next to her.

"I loved her." Makoto stopped cutting for a moment and looked sadly at Usagi.

"Usagi-chan..." Ami spoke with pity in her voice, and Usagi's eyes narrowed with new tears in her eyes.

"I loved her, and she, she isn't even real." Tears trickled down her cheek. "She lied to me." She leaned forward and began to sob into her hands again.

"Oh, Usagi-chan..." Makoto wrapped her arm around her again in comfort. "Like you said before, she still might not be an enemy. She helped you." Usagi still kept on crying.

"But you all said-"

"We can't be too hasty in our conclusions." Ami interrupted, but Usagi still couldn't stop crying. "Come on now, Usagi-chan. Let go of your transformation." Usagi shook her head.

"I don't know how." She cried softly.

"Just think of it as your Sailor Heshin. Come on now." Ami encouraged. Usagi sat there with her hands cupped together again and she closed her eyes with tears still flowing down her cheeks. Then to the other two's relief she was engulfed in light and she again sat there in her school uniform.

"There we go." Makoto said happily, but Usagi's head bent forward and she looked down at her clothes once more.

"Who am I? Usagi or Serenity?" The other two looked at each other worried and then back at the girl in front of them.

"Both." They said together.

"You are who you want to be." Ami said. Usagi frowned. She didn't know who she wanted to be at the moment. All the things she knew what she wanted for certain were unattainable at the moment and she just felt so lost. "Come on, Usagi-chan." Ami stood up. "Why don't you go to be. Its been a long night, and I'm sure we'll have an even longer day tomorrow, or..." She glanced over at the clock. "Today." She corrected. It was already one o'clock in the morning. Usagi sat there not answering.

"Come on." Makoto encouraged. "Lets get you to bed."

Usagi lay on Makoto's bed looking up at the ceiling. Sleep? It was her second favorite activity after eating, but at the moment it was the last thing she wanted to do. The bed felt so cold even though Makoto had brought in extra blankets for her. It still wasn't the same. She missed Luna's warm body against her. Usagi's hand went to the crystal on her chest, but it only gave out a cold power.

It could not replace the ones she loved: Luna, and... Mamoru. She lifted it up to view in the moonlight, and it sparkled in a million colors. It was even more beautiful than a diamond, but the sight of it disgusted her. This was the reason everyone was after her! The reason they had attacked The Silver Millenium! The reason Endymion had died! Her hand clasped around it tightly and she squeezed it hard, but only succeeded in hurting her hand. This thing wasn't worth the pain or sorrow it brought! Who cared if it was the greatest power in this Solar System, in this galaxy even?! She didn't want it! She just wanted all around her safe and happy. She wanted them to be with her. She didn't want this crystal...

She would rather have it in a thousand little pieces...

The door to his apartment opened up and she waited with patience as he stepped through the door and took off his shoes. He looked exhausted and worried, but... there was a glow to him that Kimi had only seen on him a month and a half ago: when he had been dancing with that girl!

"Finally home I see." Mamoru's head looked up at her sitting on his couch and his eyes were wide in surprise.

"K-Kimi." Kimi had caught him off guard. She never came to his apartment, he always came to her, but that didn't mean she didn't still have a key. "Wh-What are you doing here?" He studdered. Kimi stood up from her chair. She had felt it. She had felt him, his awakening. She wasn't stupid she knew that she would have to act quickly if he were to awaken and find himself remembering the past. She needed to know. How much did he remember?

"I... I just needed to see you." Kimi said, and it was almost entirely true. She wasn't lying. She had needed to see him; to know. Mamoru stood before her with a straightened back and her pulse began to quicken in anger. She could see something different in his eyes.

"Its good you're here. We need to talk." He stated plainly and Kimi tried to subdue the rage growing inside her.

"Of coarse." She agreed. She sat back down on the couch and he sat down beside her after a moments hesitation.

"There is something I need to tell you. I can only tell you so much though, just bits and pieces." He paused. "You're not going to like it."

Twenty-five minutes later Kimi sat with her hands twisted uncomfortably and Mamoru sat waiting to hear her response.

"You're... dumping me for a dream phantom?" She seethed. "A past lives' memory?" Mamoru looked at her apologetically. That stupid Princess! She had to ruin everything!

"I'm sorry." He whispered. "I can't... I can't live without her." Kimi's eyes flashed violently.

"And I'm so disposable?" She raged. He didn't answer her. "Fine. Whatever." She spat. "Go to your precious princess!" She sat there breathing hard, but a plan was already forming in her mind. "I just... want you to be happy." She looked up at him with as much sorrow as she could enact. He couldn't look at her in the eyes. Her hand touched his chest. "There is just one more problem." She said with her power building up inside her, and her finger danced ready as she prepared herself.

"Your father." Mamoru said. Kimi smiled. Oh, that should be the least of his worries. Her fingers curled and her eyes gleamed with devilish delight. She would do what she should have just done ages ago! Her power surged from her finger tips.

"You're mine!" She thought forcefully. The power surged back into her and a strong heat struck her hand, as she recoiled away frightfully.

"I'll talk to him tomorrow, and then... I guess... the papers will have a field day." Mamoru continued to whisper, not even looking at Kimi, but off to the side; completely unaware of Kimi's confused, and horrified expression as she held her one hand in the other. What was that power?! It had halted her from using her own, but what could do that? Her mind was spinning.

"T-The... the papers don't matter." She said trying to recover. She sat there looking at him with new eyes. She had always known he was special, but to have a power that strong? Where had it come from? She didn't remember him having it in the past! But then again, he had been the only one to resist Queen Metalia's influence. Perhaps the power had been there all along, but no one had ever noticed it before. Kimi watched as Mamoru continued to talk, but she wasn't listening. She couldn't use her powers on him now. She needed to think of something. She could use this to her advantage if she just thought about it! A new twisted smile made itself at home as a plan came to her.

"You know, I would at least like to know what kind of a phantom dream I'm loosing you to." She complained. Mamoru froze, and his body grew tense as he turned his head back to face her.

"I don't think that's a good idea." He said. Kimi bit back her anger. "Its just..."

"What? Don't I deserve to at least have that one courtesy?" Mamoru kept looking at her with such a disturbed face and Kimi backed down. She couldn't have him remembering. Not now when she was so close to getting her hands around The Princess' little, white neck. She watched as he slumped some, and she knew she had him in her clutches again.

"Alright." He said giving in. "I'll set up something." He promised. Kimi smiled. This was it! The chance she had been waiting for!

"I can't wait."

"Do you dream often? Tomoe-san?" Hotaru only stared out the window, and the doctor could only sigh. "I can't help you if you don't talk to me." The doctor looked back to his notes once more and then sat back in the chair with another sigh. "I have to be honest with you. You are the strangest case I've ever had." He began. "On record you've never had a days worth of music lessons, but you play the violin, flute, and piano perfectly. You quote books that we are certain you have never been given access to. You speak English, German, and French, and we swear you have never been taught." He looked at the series of names listed on his notes. "Yet despite each of your talents, every one of your roommates that you have ever had has left within a matter of weeks." He paused. "Some of them became another one of my patients. I can't tell you what they said of course, but... Is it possible any of them are true?" Hotaru shifted positions in her chair but she still did not look at him. "Then there was last night's episode..." Hotaru's chin came closer to her chest and she seemed angry. "Hotaru, do you have any hope for the future?" He asked finally in defeat. "It seems that you are bright and intelligent, but... whenever given the chance you relapse. You put yourself back into this position, back into my chair. You could be thriving at this school, but..." He sighed again. "What is your hope if you can't come to terms with what happened?"

"Hope is the thing with feathers."

"Excuse me?" The doctor frowned. It was the first thing she had said since last night's episode in the dorms, and it made no sense to him at all, but what she said rarely ever did.

""Hope" is the thing with feathers—

That perches in the soul—

And sings the tune without the words—

And never stops—at all—

And sweetest—in the Gale—is heard—

And sore must be the storm—

That could abash the little Bird That kept so many warm—

I've heard it in the chillest land—

And on the strangest seas—

Yet, never, in Extremity,

It asked a crumb—of Me."

The doctor hurriedly scratched down the emphasized part at the end. She would always put importance to a part of the poem or even change it to get her point across at times. He sighed once more.

"More poems, Tomoe-san?" He really should call them riddles. Hotaru looked back out the window.

"I do dream often." She said finally answering his question from earlier. The doctor smiled. Finally he had something.

"What about?" Hotaru looked at him, and he wished she hadn't. Her violet eyes were so cold and dark.

"I dream of them." He tilted his head in confusion.

"Who? Your parents?" Hotaru continued to stare and the doctor sighed. It was becoming a very bad habit it seemed, but he couldn't help it. Tomoe was never clear. "If I tell them you can go back to the school, will you promise to behave?" Hotaru stared out the window again. "Tomoe-san?" The doctor asked in a lower tone.

"I promise to do what I need to." Hotaru answered truthfully. The doctor smiled.

"Then I guess I can say that you are ready to go back." Hotaru stood up and walked over to the window. Her hand touched the glass as she stared out into the distance.

"Yes. To go back." She said in a distant tone. This young girl was so mysterious.

"See something?" He asked.

"The little bird." She said. The doctor sighed one more time.

"The one that," He tried to remember the poem enough. "Kept so many warm?" He quoted.

"Yes." She answered without hesitation for once.

"Who is that?" The doctor asked trying to get the most out of her that he could. Hotaru looked back at him and he felt his blood freezing in his veins. The icy blast in her eyes felt almost physical.

The door to the dorm opened wide, and the other girls who sat around the table doing their homework looked upwards as a cold chill swept through the room. The dark haired girl entered in, and the soft chatter died instantly at the sight of her. Last night's episode had scared them beyond words, and each one took turns stealing quick glances up at her, their uneasiness affecting the entire room. Hotaru's violet eyes glanced their way and the other girls' eyes looked downward quickly; not wanting to feel the full force of her cold gaze. If they would have kept watching her in that moment they would not have found her usual cold stare, but one of sorrow as she watched them avoid her. They would have seen tears in the back of her lonely eyes.

Hotaru stepped into her own room without a word, and slowly closed the door with her back leaning against it. The room was cold despite the sunlight shining through the window, but Hotaru didn't notice the chill, only the lonely silence that surrounded her. Yes, she was free of the doctor once more. Free to be alone in her little room. Hotaru's head fell forward and her hair hide her face as she pressed her lips together tightly and the palms of her hands pressed against the door.

"Hotaru-chan..."

"You can do it... Hotaru..." Hotaru's head lifted quickly as she gasped in pain and a few tears glistened in her now hard and determined eyes.

"Hai!"

The group of students paid no attention to her as they ate outside under the bright sun in the sky. It was the perfect day for a picnic, absolutely beautiful, and they were all taking advantage of it. Hotaru's face turned away from them all and she looked towards the city in the distance. She glanced back at them for a moment, but they were all still too occupied to notice her. She stepped away from them and towards the corner of the school where she would soon be entirely out of view.

The little bird was waiting for her. Hotaru had felt it. She had felt her abrupt awakening and the time to move was now. She had to go.

Hotaru stepped away from the school and soon she was running. She slowed down to a halt as she neared the edge of the school grounds and the hill sloped downward into a group of trees. This was it... Her feet tingled as her toes touched what she knew was the very end of the school grounds. Hotaru could only stand there staring out into the distance. This was what she needed to do... Her breathing was already becoming difficult, but... Hotaru stepped forward. Her whole body shivered as she broke free and a bright smile appeared on her face, but she was just like The Dryad who had left her tree in order to discover new worlds. She locked the door of her safe prison behind her knowing she would never return. She was different than The Dryad though, she was not leaving her designated place in life, and heading towards her death. No, she was heading towards her mission and duty. She was off the school grounds, and her legs moved her forward in a heated run. She was running towards her dreams; her future.

Hotaru's legs pumped faster as the cover of the trees came closer. She just needed to get there and then she would be safe from the school's view. She needed to get back. Back to Juban.

Suddenly she was free of the school's shadow, and free to do her duty and complete her mission...

She was free to be with the ones she loved...

Notes:

Hope is The Thing With Feathers: An Emily Dickenson poem that I had to memories in eight grade and have never forgotten.