Chapter Two
"I want to talk to Dean on my own before I go," Tim told Sam. They had another ten days, but Sam didn't like the thought of being apart from Tim for any length of time.
"I don't know if that's the best idea this time..." Sam prevaricated. Tim smiled.
"I know. But if we're all going to be part of each other's lives, so I think there are some things need saying."
But Dean avoided any chance if being alone with Tim. After Cas had disappeared, Dean had been restless and twice when Tim pushed to talk with him, he took off. The second time, Sam called him to check on him and was frustrated to find Dean had gone out on a hunt, with Benny.
"Y'know, Sam, maybe Benny isn't that bad for Dean," Tim suggested tentatively.
"He's a vampire."
"Yeah, you've met non-killer vampires before. I think you said Benny even looks like one of Lenore's guys," Tim touched Sam's arm, feeling the muscles in his forearm were as tense as cables under this sleeve. "Why are you so resistant to him trusting someone he fought back to back with the whole length of purgatory? Are you jealous?"
"Why would I be-I have no problem with him hunting with Cas, I'm not jealous!"
"Cas isn't human, either, though."
"But I know how much Cas cares about Dean. He'd never let anything happen to him."
"Maybe you should try to get to know Benny then, maybe you'd feel more comfortable."
"Tim, I don't...I just..." Sam shook his head. Tim let his hand slide down to Sam's and squeezed his fingers.
"You'll figure this out," Tim assured him.
~~~SPNCIS~~~
Abby called every few days to check on them. Tim would talk with her for a little while, then she would demand to talk to Sam who would end up reassuring her that Tim was well taken care of, then laughing at one of her crazy ideas or comments before handing the phone back.
Tim and Sam had gone out for a walk together, and Sam had decided to get some running in, circling back to Tim every half mile or so. Though Castiel had sped the healing of Tim's gunshot wound, he knew the jouncing of running would be too painful, so he encouraged Sam to get his run in while they were out. Sam insisted on coming back to spend a few minutes with Tim each mile. With only two days until Tim was going home, Tim didn't mind Sam staying close.
Tim's phone rang as Sam headed back out for another loop. Abby chattered on about how everyone was doing, then asked to speak to Sam.
"He's out for a few minutes, Abs," Tim told her.
"So you can talk freely! Ooo, so how is it with Sam with his brother? People are so different with their families."
"Yeah, it is a new side of him. He's...less sure of himself, more sensitive to the little remarks he perceives as criticism, y'know?"
"Totally. You are so that way with Tony, and he's not even blood."
"Abby... It's gonna be really hard to leave Sam." Tim slowed his walking pace with the weight of his thoughts.
"Aww. Have you thought about asking him to move to Washington?"
"His work, with his brother...it's really important stuff. I don't want to ask him to choose." Tim's fear of which Sam would choose haunted the problem, hovering ever in the back of his mind.
"Well...his work brings him here, some. You'll be able to see him pretty often," Abby the optimist said.
"Yeah. I hope it'll be enough. See you in a few days, Abs."
~~~SPNCIS~~~
Dean returned the day before Tim left, and though there was tension between the brothers, they didn't argue over Benny while Tim was there.
After dinner, Sam gave Tim a significant look then retreated to the bedroom.
"Dean, I want to-"
"I gotta make a beer run," Dean announced, snagging his jacket and heading toward the stairs. Tim set his jaw and moved to block his way. "Dude, I'll be back in like an hour."
"You've avoided being alone with me, but I have things to say to you that I don't want Sam to be here for. So just listen."
"Oh, c'mon, man-"
"Should I come with you? You might be more comfortable talking in your car," Tim suggested. Dean scowled.
"Fine. Say whatever it is you don't want Sammy to hear. Let's have it."
Tim took a deep breath before launching into the speech he'd thought about for so long. "I can take care of Sam. You don't know me, but I am a federal special agent. I'm in the top 3% for marksmanship and I've got hand to hand training from an Israeli assassin. I'm smart, Dean, and I will do anything to keep Sam safe. Your warrants? They're gone. I've made you both ghosts in every law enforcement database, and there's no one out there who's capable of tracing what I've done. I have Sam's back and I would die for him. I don't want us pulling on him like a rope in a tug-of-war. There's no competition between us, Sam's got a huge heart and he loves us both.
"You guys are heroes. You'd have medals and accolades if the world knew what you've done. I can't give you that, but I can give you this: you deserve to have your own life, not just as Sam's caretaker, and if you can learn to trust me, trust that he's safe when he's with me, then you have your chance to find your own happiness, too."
Dean stared hard at Tim, scowling. Tim met the look with a flinty one of his own. He knew it was time to show his steel. Dean looked like he was going to say something, then closed his mouth. He gave Tim a sharp pat on the shoulder and headed for the door, taking the steps two at a time.
"I'm gonna hit the bar instead. I'll be gone for a few hours, I think. See you tomorrow before you go," Dean said, then closed the door behind him. Tim smiled; he took it as a good sign that Dean would clear out so he and Sam could be alone. Rising up on his toes then back down, Tim practically skipped to the bedroom to tell Sam. He stopped outside the door with a better idea.
Stripping naked and leaving his clothes on the floor, Tim threw open the door and jumped inside dramatically posing like a superhero. Sam responded to the door crashing open like the seasoned fighter he was and he dropped to a crouch, gun in one hand, knife in the other.
"Tim?! What the hell?"
Tim laughed, blushing but maintaining his ridiculous posture, fists on hips, body angled, chest out, head high.
"I have successfully won Dean over. At least enough so he's given us the next few hours alone," Tim declared. Sam put the weapons away and approached, shaking his head quizzically.
"Baby, you're naked," Sam informed him as he drew close. The blush on Tim's cheeks and the sparkle in his eyes was the most adorable thing Sam had seen in a long time. Sam licked his lips, beginning to smile.
"Very observant, Sam," Tim again declared in his pseudo superhero voice. Then he waggled his eyebrows and dropped his chin to look at Sam from under his eyelashes. "Whatcha gonna do 'bout it?" He whispered mischievously. Sam just stood there, grinning, enjoying this goofy playfulness.
Tim waited, wondering how Sam would react. He was taken completely by surprise when Sam moved, displaying his lightning fast speed, wrapping his arms around Tim, lifting him, turning and with two strides, then chucking him onto the bed. Tim barely had time to gasp before Sam pounced on him, pinning him down with his superior weight and strength. Tim's uproarious laughter was cut off by Sam's mouth on his.
Playful and fun in contrast to the serious, soul searching love-making or the drunken intensity they'd been doing since their near break-up, they wrestled and laughed. Tim had to use tricks he'd learned from Mossad-trained former assassin Ziva to get the upper hand, but happily relinquished control when Sam, now naked, knelt straddling his chest.
Sam grinned and lined himself up, beginning to slide down onto Tim, impaling himself groaning at the friction, the sweet ache of fullness and watching Tim's surprise as this new position turn to intense pleasure, his pale skin flushing pink, mouth dropping open, eyes narrowing. Tim had no idea when or how Sam had managed to use lube to be ready for this, and he quickly found he didn't care. Sam couldn't lower himself any further so he began to rock his hips and tighten on Tim who cried out breathlessly. Reaching down to flutter his fingers on Tim's nipples, Sam was astonished at the explosion of words that flew from Tim in a torrent, his hips bucking wildly.
"Oh-fuck-Sam-Sam-Sam-god-I'm-gonna-come-that-feels-so-good-fuck-fuck-Sam-hot-so-hot-oh-my-god-so-tight-fuck-fuck!-Sam-Sam-SAM!"
Inspired, thrilled by Tim's reaction, Sam started sliding up and down his shaft, working his nipples, squeezing him tight and it was only moments before Tim exploded, howling and tossing his head, pounding the mattress with his fists.
They laughed breathlessly together, Sam shaking his head at the unexpected response he'd received. "What the hell was that, man?" Sam asked, holding the gasping, quivering Tim to his chest.
"I don't know," Tim panted. He was still feeling the twitching aftershocks and shuddered. "Just... Deep in you, both nipples, you laughing and smiling and playing... God, so happy, feeling like-like we're really actually okay again. I don't know, but damn! I liked that."
Sam stroked his hand down Tim's cheek, rubbing his thumb over his bottom lip. "Me too. Seeing, hearing you get all wild... Man, that was awesome."
Tim moved up to kiss him, his hands wandering, wanting Sam to have some release as well, but Sam just kept it to a snuggle. Tim looked questioningly at him.
"We have a couple hours, you said. I want a fantasy, when you've recovered enough," Sam smirked. Tim laughed.
"Oh my god. The table?"
"Hmm, maybe right at the top of the stairs against the railing so that every time I walk into the bunker, that view will make me smile."
"Whatever you want, Sam. Wherever you want it."
Cradling Tim's face, Sam felt such a swell of affection that he swallowed hard and pulled Tim closer. He kept seeing something in Tim's eyes, a shadow: fear, maybe, or doubt, and it killed him. He had to find a way to get the clear, almost childlike trust and wonder back in those beautiful eyes.
An hour later, Tim closed his eyes, listening to Sam moan, crying out to him, voice booming through the vaulted ceilings from their position overlooking the heart of the bunker, carefully cataloging every sound his lover made as he stood behind him, buried deep, holding his hips and thrusting repeatedly. When Sam came, the rhythmic tightening drew Tim over as well, and as his orgasm concluded, he heard Sam laughing and opened his eyes.
Releasing the grip he'd had on the railing, Sam stood and pointed. Tim looked over the edge but couldn't see anything.
"I'm gonna hafta mop," Sam chortled. Tim smiled at Sam's juvenile amusement at having his semen splatter and ruffled his hair.
"Got some distance, huh?"
Sam examined the decorative railing. "I think I completely missed this and it all went over the edge. Ha!" He snickered. "Maybe I should leave it."
"Ugh, gross, Sam. Man, Dean brings out the kid in you for sure," Tim shook his head. Sam turned back to him, considering.
"Yeah, he does, doesn't he?" Sam thought back to all the pranks he and Dean had played on each other through the years as well as the reactions he surprised himself with sometimes when Dean did or said something that made Sam feel 10 years old.
Tim smiled at Sam's reaction, loving how intelligent and thoughtful Sam was. He enjoyed his playfulness as well, but leaving such a mess for Dean to find was just disgusting.
They cleaned up, showered, and were back at the stack of books they'd been scanning when Dean returned. He looked around suspiciously and eyed them before he dropped into a chair at the table and started surfing the internet.
An hour and three scanned books later, Dean called Sam's attention to a story he'd found. Tim came over to observe from a few feet away as they discussed the possibility of Dean's find being a case. Tim was surprised at how astute the brothers' investigative instincts were, but chided himself silently for the reaction. This was their profession, and from what he'd read, they were some of the best hunters around. Lack of organization among hunters seemed to reduce their effectiveness, but standing in the headquarters of a group which had been wiped out because they were a threat to the forces of evil helped Tim understand why. He couldn't help but think that with the internet as a resource, hunters might be able to safely get their communal act together, but he decided he'd have to think that through before broaching the subject to Sam.
~~~SPNCIS~~~
Packed and loaded, Dean shook Tim's hand and then went back inside to let Sam have a private good-bye. Enfolding Tim in his arms, Sam felt his heart pound painfully. Parting was never easy, but this time seemed worse. Tim nuzzled his face into the crook of Sam's neck, breathing deeply of the scent of him, feeling Sam's hair against his cheek, squeezing his eyes closed when he felt them stinging. Sam held him tightly, feeling him tremble and being awash in helplessness to make him feel better.
"Now that Dean knows, I can be more open about wanting to find cases in the east. And I can talk on the phone more..." Sam's voice was thick with the emotion he tried not to give into. Tim nodded, indicating he'd heard but not responding otherwise. Sam stroked Tim's hair. "Ah, baby. We're gonna be okay," Sam whispered.
Tim soaked it in, the sound of Sam's voice, if not the words, his heat, the strength of his arms, fine tremors slowly fading as he lost himself in the moment, the comfort of being present.
But finally, it was time for Tim to leave or risk missing his flight. Sam offered that they could talk on the phone while Tim drove to the airport, and Tim accepted, taking comfort in the intimacy of Sam's voice low in his ear as they chatted randomly for the time it took for him to get to the car rental return. Pulling into the little parking lot, they said good-bye after Sam extracted a promise to let him know when he landed in DC.
Hollowness with an ache around the edges was all Tim felt as he made his way home, passing through the other travelers like a wraith. He dozed restlessly on the plane and sent Sam a short text as the other passengers rose to gather their carry-on luggage before following. He paid the taxi and carried his bags up into his apartment, dumping them in the living room before crawling into bed with an uneven sigh.
Back to life without Sam.
~~~SPNCIS~~~
A/N Anyone else notice that Ty Olsson was one of Lenore's family (Eli) before he was Benny?