The Apprehensive and The Optimistic
Chapter 5

AN:: Thank you to the reviewers! Cupid, you posted anonymously, so i couldn't reply to you. But thanks a lot! I really appreciated that review :) and of course, i reply to your reviews but Leh-housemaniac, you're lovely as always.

APIH

Anthony fell to his knees afterward and covered his face in his hands as he tried to control his giggling. There's no way he just did that embarrassing dance with Ian. This was all a dream, he was going to take his hands from his face, and he would be staring up at his ceiling, and it would be Friday morning. Anthony removed his hands and opened his eyes just in time to see Ian run out of the room flailing, and the rest of the group dieing and clinging to each other while they laughed.

Anthony felt himself break into a fit of laughter again, his voice lost in the room. As the laughter died down, and people could actually speak, David looked at his friends, "You guys wanna get started?"

"Yeah." Mari nodded, and looked Anthony, "Why don't you go check on Ian? He probably ran to the bathroom, down the hall, take a left and It's the door on the right."

Anthony blinked, "Uh, sure." He stood up and brushed himself off, walking out of the room. Anthony followed Mari's instructions. He walked down the hall, and took to the left, he knocked on the door to the right, "Hey, Ian? You okay in there?" Ian didn't reply, but Anthony heard the door unlock. The brunette felt his cheeks flush, for some unknown reason, and he slowly pushed the door open. The bathroom was big, and nice. The shower took up most of the room, and beside that was the toilet. Ian was at the sink, opposite the door. Anthony shut the door, moved forward and stood at the side of the sink, "Matt's house is so nice." He commented fondly.

Ian laughed, running his hands under the water, "Yeah, we always have our parties and get togethers here." He cupped his palms letting them fill with water and splashed his face, sighing softly.

Anthony leaned on his left hip, and folded his arms over his chest, "Are you all right?" He asked, frowning some.

Ian nodded, cupping his palms under the water again, "Yeah. It just sucks failing at Just Dance twice in a row. And this is the second time we've done it."

"You've lost every time." Anthony commented, not in a cocky, or teasing way, he just said it. He attempted to smile, and lifted a hand patting Ian on the back, "It was fun though." He laughed, and shook his head, "I've never had this much fun."

Ian looked at Anthony, smile on his face, "It was fun." He turned off the water, and grabbed a towel to dry his hands, "David and I danced to together last time." He said it with a specific fondness. A fondness he only had when he looked, or talked to David.

Anthony felt his chest tighten and he sighed looking at his shoes, "Hey, Ian. Can I ask you something that's absolutely none of my business?" He looked back up at Ian.

Ian nodded, "Sure, man. Anything." He attempted at smile at Anthony, but the other teen didn't return it.

Anthony sighed, and stuff his hands in his pockets, "What's up with you and David? Is he your...boyfriend?" Anthony didn't like the way the question sounded on his tongue. It felt like it was wrong, and he never wanted to ask it again.

Ian blinked, his cheeks turning into a pink blush quickly, Anthony couldn't help but find that the color suited Ian, "Well..i-it's complicated. I'm not, he's not...we're not boyfriends." Ian said, itching his temple, making a confused expression, "We...do things boyfriends do. We go on dates, kiss and stuff..." His cheeks turned from pink to red, He cleared his throat, "I've met his family, and he knows my mom pretty Well, he's met my dad. I spent Christmas with him last year, and I went to the beach with him after he graduated." Ian sighed, looking off into space, "He..wants to be official, but I have trouble committing to stuff like that. I have some baggage y'know?"

Anthony shook his head, "I don't know." He felt miserable, and he wasn't sure why. He wanted to know so bad, and now that he did he wanted to go back in time and take back his question.

Ian frowned, "Are you okay with it? Me being with David?"

"Does it matter if I am?" The brown eyed teen asked, staring at Ian.

The bowl haired teen shook his head, "No, I'll stay with David regardless. I guess, I would just like to know that me being gay isn't a problem."

Anthony shrugged his shoulders, "My mom thinks gays are a disease. That's all I've ever heard about them really." The color drained from Ian's face, and he looked to the ground. Anthony sighed, and removed his hands from his pocket and lifted them to Ian's shoulders, "But...you're cool. And David isn't as bad as I make him out to be, so, I think my mom is wrong."

Ian stared at Anthony like his said something profound, Anthony felt himself blush under the stare, Ian laughed and nodded, "You're a Good guy, Anthony."

Anthony's arms dropped to his sides, "W-Well.." He wasn't sure what to say to Ian, so he folded his arms over his chest and shrugged as he looked off to the side, avoiding Ian's stare.

"Aww," Ian all but giggled, and Anthony felt a hand run through his hair. When looked back up Ian was on his tip toes ruffling his hair, "Anthony."

Anthony blushed and stepped away, "Shut up, that's gay man." He smiled regardless, and chuckled softly.

Ian made a shocked face, "Oh, no! I can't possibly act gay!" He smiled and laughed with Anthony, "Come on, let's go back out to those losers." Anthony nodded, And followed Ian. It was oddly quiet, the music was turned down and now was just faint in the background, but the voices of the others were gone. Ian had a slight frown on his face, "Umm.." He seemed to be taken off guard by this too. When They turned the corner into the living room, They suddenly heard the group yell, "Surprise! Happy Birthday, Ian!"

Ian blinked in shock, along with Anthony, "I-I...what?" His voice cracked.

Anthony looked at Ian, "It's your birthday?" He felt like an idiot for not knowing.

Ian looked at Anthony, with as much shock, "N-No! It's not for another two weeks!"

Mari stepped forward laughed, "We know that, idiot. I'm going to be leaving next week to visit my grandmother in Japan, so I won't be here for your birthday." She rolled her eyes, "Not that it matters, because your going with David to Florida."

Joshua laughed, and wrapped an arm around her shoulder, "Basically, we wanted to do something for your seventeenth birthday, and we figured this party was a great surprise. We're all gonna be in different places during Thanksgiving break, so, we wanted to be able to do something nice for you. 'Cause, Well, you're always there for us."

Matt stepped forward next, "Josh, your gay is showing."

The taller teen laughed, "Well, shit. No point in hiding it now, huh?"

Ian face was slightly pink, he was obviously embarrassed, and he kept doing strange things with his hands, "Guys..that...you didn't have to do this." He ran his fingers through his hair.

"Don't say that." David laughed, as he stood beside his friends, "Don't act all modest when you deserve a nice surprise, and a ton of compliments."

Ian's eyes landed on him, and he frowned, "Being a friend is no reason for extra compliments. I just do what friends should do. I-I don't like surprises, you guys know this."

Anthony felt like he was missing something, some key component to the conversation, but he saw the hurt and disappointment spread across the groups face, and after everyone said something, Anthony felt he had to. He stepped forward a little and looked down at Ian, "Don't..act like your undeserving." He said, and suddenly everyone's eyes were on him and felt himself panic a little, "Stop..acting so nervous, and shy, Ian. These guys..we're your friends, and I might've only been around a week or so, or a day in your guys case, but, within a week, you've made my life ten times better."

Ian sighed, "Anthony.."

"Don't 'Anthony' me." Ian gave him a shocked look, and he clenched his hands into fists, "Look, I think David's right. I think that you deserve to be showered in compliments, or have a surprise party from friends who care about you. Coming from me," Anthony unclenched his fists and rubbed the back of his neck, "A guy who, up until a week ago, never had a group of friends to play Halo with, or play Just Dance with. A guy who..actually had zero friends, and just let life pass by, not knowing what kind of people he was missing out on." Anthony felt his eyes sting a little and he looked at Ian's friends, his friends, "Just, you talking to me at that party has made my life...better." He let out a dry chuckle, "And, Well, it may sound lame, but you're the coolest guy I've ever talked to. And I wish we could've been friends sooner, Ian. Because there's already so much I've missed out on, and I wish we could've done all that together. All of us." Anthony said to the group.

The room was silent, except for the spice girls playing in the background, Anthony felt himself sweat a little. Did he say something wrong? He must have rambled on, and now everyone thought he was an idiot. Suddenly someone sniffed and Anthony looked up to see Mari, the corner of her eyes filling with tears, her eyes on Ian, "Ian..If you never got those girls to back off me in our freshman year, I would probably be friendless, or-or my friends would have gotten be to be this horrible person like them."

"Mari, that was just, that was something anyone would've done-"

Mari cut Ian off, "It wasn't though!" She smiled, and rubbed her eyes, "You went out of your way to see why I was backed into a corner. And then you went even more out of your way to get Hilary and her skank trio off my ass, and then, you invite me to sit with you at lunch." She laughed, "You even shared with me because I had my money taken earlier, you didn't have to do any of that. You're so sweet, Ian."

Josh laughed, "Oh God, if I start crying." Mari and him chuckled and he looked at Ian, "Back on your first day, when Mr. Huffman had me show you around school I wanted to punch you." Ian actually laughed, smiling at Josh, "I really did, you were so loud and annoying, and You drew so much attention to us..." He suddenly frowned, "I'm sorry. After..After you made Bobby, and Eric your enemies I just ignored you, because I didn't want what you were going through to happen to me." Josh sighed, and pinched the bridge of his nose, annoyed with his memory of himself, "But, it happened regardless. They were in my face anyway. And you were there, out of no where, sticking up for me, the guy that was such a douche to you."

Ian smiled, "Josh, I...you were the closest thing to a friend I had, and I knew why you backed off. I was never mad at you."

Matt laughed, "I guess, I'll go next, huh?" He looked at Ian, who smiled back, "Hi." He said awkwardly.

"Hello." Ian chuckled.

Matt nodded, "So, I don't have this heroic story about you. But...there was that time my sister and I got into a fight, and She left me stranded at the mall. In the rain. Remember that?"

Ian nodded, "That's when you and Josh were first becoming friends. I met you, and we just started talking."

"Right." The blonde smiled, "So, there I was, in the pouring rain. Stuck at the mall with a dead cellphone. And this guys pulls up to me, and asks how much he'd get for fifty bucks." The group laughed, and Matt shifted his weight to his other hip, "And he goes out of his way to give me a ride home, even though he was late to his track meet. Not all that heroic, but, it was pretty nice of you, dude."

Anthony felt himself smile. Mari was in tears, and Josh looked like he could break into them at any moment, Anthony looked at Ian. He looked so overwhelmed, he looked nervous, but he also looked happy. And that made Anthony happy.

"It was my junior year." David said, and everyone looked over at him, "I was just sitting in the bleachers, minding my own business when these annoying fucking freshman were arguing behind me. Over the stupidest possible thing." He laughed, "What the flag for England looked like. This one douchebag, vs three others. I got so frustrated with the conversation I got out my phone and looked it up. I was...surprised that that one douchebag was right." Ian laughed and shook his head, so Anthony figured he was that one douchebag, "I turned around and held out my phone, showing them the England flag. The kid started cheering and went to thank me. And then we locked eyes, and neither of us spoke, I knew I couldn't. I just couldn't because that douchebag was just so beautiful, and I felt like a forth grader with a crush." Anthony felt himself smile, and he looked at Ian, whose hands were folded over his chest. He was blushing, and staring back at David, "And that beautiful guy ditched his friends and slid down to the seat beside me and introduced himself, not only that, but he asked me if I wanted to get pizza afterwards." David stepped forward and stood in front of Ian, "Even though I was a dork, and a little controlling, that douchebag stuck with me. And then I graduated. I wasn't excited like everyone else, because I knew I had to go to college, and be away from him. So, when I asked him if we were going to continue to be more than friends, because I was moving he said..."

Ian chuckled and covered his mouth, staring at David, "Really?" At David's nod, Ian removed his hand, amused smirk on his face, "It's not even romantic."

"I don't care." David shrugged.

"Oh my God.." Ian groaned and covered his face, he looked up and sighed, " I said, 'Of course, dickbiscuit, don't ask me stupid questions.' "

David laughed, "What'd you say after that.." He took Ian's hands in his own, smirking.

Ian blushed deeper, "I'm not repeating that part, you friggin' pervert."

David smiled, laughing, "What..I'm trying to say is we've been doing this thing for two years. And I..." He sighed, "You may not call me your boyfriend, and I'll wait until your ready. Because, I've realized that in these two years, that.." David groaned and let his head fall on Ian's shoulder, Ian chuckled and smiled fondly, David sighed and stood up straight, "Ian Hecox..I realized that I love you."

Everyone stared in shock, including Ian. At the same time, everyone waited for an answer, all eyes on Ian. The bowl haired teen blinked, "D-David.."

"It's okay if you can't say it." David said, smiling, "It's okay."

Ian frowned, his bottom sticking out in a small pout, "It's not okay. Two years, David. Two years and I can't even.." He let out a strangled sob and suddenly Anthony felt like he was intruding on something extremely personal, but he couldn't look away. He felt like he was on and edge to a cliff, one foot on safe, strong ground, the other hanging over, a possibility of falling into a world of uncertainty and doubt. He wasn't sure what it meant, whether in the next few minutes he fell or stood strong, but he didn't care, he just watched. The other guys watched too, so he didn't feel as bad.

David frowned, and pulled him into a hug, "Ian relax."

"I ca-can't..." He gasped and suddenly the room was full of sobs, he buried his face in David's shoulders and gasped out apologies and mumbled out what he wished he could give David.

"Oh.." Josh said awkwardly and Mari elbowed him in the ribs.

Soon a few seconds became minutes. Five, ten, fifteen and Anthony was becoming concerned. Ian was still sobbing into David's shoulder, mumbling out everything, apologizing for so much, Anthony was a little overwhelmed. He knew Ian for a week and seeing this side of him so early broke him a little, honestly. He knew Ian had to have a heavy past, but to cry like that over something so little as not saying, 'I love you too.' Anthony was scared. David just sat there, rubbing his back. Mumbling out 'okays', and 'I understands', Anthony felt that he should be doing more, like moving Ian out of the room, and have them be alone, but he held his tongue.

Ian started wheezing, and he gasped, David blinked and pulled away from him, "Ian? Ian?!" Ian lifted a hand to his chest and he gasped a breath again, the sound felt like a stab to Anthony's chest.

Suddenly Matt shoved David aside and place a hand on Ian's shoulder, "Do you have your inhaler?!" When Ian shook his head Matt cursed and rushed out of the room.

David blinked and went to Ian again. Mari stepped forward but Anthony frowned, "Give him space!" They both looked at him, "Give him space. You can't crowd around him right now." He looked at Ian, and blinked, "Ian, sit down, it might help." David stepped back, and Anthony moved forward as Ian sat down on his knees. Anthony sighed, "Just try to breath okay, you got this, asthma attacks are nothing, my brother has them all the time.." Ian stared at him, nodding, and attempted to take a deep breath, coughing and squeezing his eye's shut again. He gasped and Anthony rubbed his back, "Don't get ahead of yourself. Smaller, start small."

"It's...hurts." He wheezed out and he let tears fall from his eyes, coughing.

"Don't do that, don't talk." Anthony said, rubbing his back. He looked at Ian's button up plaid shirt, and he grabbed the fabric, "Is this tight, does it feel tight?" At Ian's nod, Anthony frowned, "I'm gonna take it off you."

David stepped forward, "W-wait a minute!"

Anthony shot him a glare and was about to reply when Ian gasped, "Let him. Just.."

"Don't. Talk. Try to breath, in and out." Anthony took Ian's hand and set it on his waist, breathing clearly, "See? It's easy." Ian nodded, and Anthony brought his fingers to Ian's shirt. Anthony hadn't realized he was shaking, he let out a breath and began unbuttoning Ian's shirt. Ian's hand gripped tightly at Anthony's clothes as he wheezed, and attempted to sucked in air. He finished and looked at Ian, "Is it better? Nod, if it is." Ian nodded, shutting his eyes. Anthony rested his hand on Ian's waist, trying to see how uneven his breath was. He leaned his ear near Ian's mouth and slid his hand to a different spot to better feel his chest rise and fall. His was blushing and he knew it, Ian's bare chest under his hand and his puffs of erratic breath on his ear, "That's better.." Anthony mumbled and shifted looking at Ian. They were so close...

Suddenly Matt ran in, and he stood next to Anthony, handing him inhaler, "Anthony, here, inhaler."

"Thank God." Mari said.

Anthony lifted it to Ian's mouth and moved his hand under the cloth of Ian's shirt to his back, "Ready? Breath." He clicked in the button and Ian breathed, Anthony repeated this a few times, until Ian took the inhaler and did it himself. Anthony went to move away, but Ian's grip on his waist tighten and pulled him back.

"Can crying even trigger an asthma attack?" Mari asked, shocked.

Matt and Anthony both nodded, but Matt answered, "Any major change in ones breathing pattern can. Laughing, or crying. Ian should have realized, though, that he was having trouble breathing, before it got that bad." Matt frowned at him.

"It's not his fault." David defended Ian, glaring at Matt.

Ian sighed, Anthony still rubbing his bare back, "I could..tell.." He said slowly, "I couldn't...stop crying. I'm sorry...for the scare." He breathed with the inhaler again.

Mari smiled sadly, "Don't apologize. You're okay so that's Good." She looked at Matt, "Nice save." Matt smiled back, blushing.

Josh sighed, "I say we go get the presents and cake. Ian should be find soon right?"

"Give him a few minutes." Anthony said, "He'll be Good for another Just Dance match." Ian chuckled, and shook his head.

Mari nodded, "All right guys let's go. David, C'mon." She called to him as her, Josh, and Matt left the room.

David walked forward and crouched beside Ian, "I'm sorry."

Ian shook his head, "Don't be." David leaned forward and Ian met his lips halfway. Anthony blushed as Ian dropped the inhaler and lifted his hands to David's cheeks. Anthony looked down, and snatched the inhaler, sitting crisscross on the floor. David pulled away and kissed Ian's forehead before disappearing. Ian looked at Anthony, and let go of his waist, "Sorry about that." He mumbled.

Anthony blinked, "Oh, he's your...kinda boyfriend, It's okay."

Ian smiled, "I was talking about my death grip on you, but, I'm sorry about that too."

Anthony blinked and blushed more, "Well..okay." He attempted a smile, "You did Good, Ian. I'm proud of you."

Ian chuckled, "You're the one who came to my rescue. I mean, everyone was saying I'm some sort of hero, and then there you are..." He smirked, "If I take off your shirt will I see the Superman symbol?" He looked down at his own chest, and buttoned up the blue, short sleeved, plaid shirt.

Anthony watched him, mouth becoming strangely dry, "Uh..."

Ian's smile grew, "Regardless, thank you, my hero. You were brave... Take a compliment, geez."

Anthony half-smiled, "I think David got angry when I got to unbutton your shirt." He shouldn't, but he felt a little Good about making David jealous. It was wrong, he knew that, yes. But it was like a sweet victory, seeing that look of anger on his face.

Ian nodded, "Yeah, he's probably still pissed. But, can you blame him? Switch spots with him, your boyfriend or girlfriend is having an asthma attack, and some guy you don't know swoops in and helps them out of it. And...Well...gets to unbutton their shirt."

Anthony nodded, his chest tightening at Ian's scenario, "Yeah, I get it." Suddenly They heard the group singing happy birthday and They came forward. Josh holding the cake, and a the others holding their gifts. Anthony smiled at the glow in Ian's eyes and felt himself sigh contently.

He was glad to have a best friend like Ian, and he was glad he was the one who helped Ian. He never felt this way before, but when he looked at Ian, stomach did a weird flip, he knew that he wouldn't experience the feeling if he didn't have Ian. So he liked the feeling, and as They spent more time together, he became use to it, more comfortable with it. To the point where he barely noticed it.

AN::

Wow. A lot happened...sounds like a fun slumber party huh? The next chapter is shorter than the rest, it's more a filler and it starts out with a light joking tone. You guys will like it!