Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans
We follow him as if we're the ones who are lost. I think we're waiting for him to collapse. I know he won't. We're only walking into the Tower from the garage, but it's longer than we ever thought.
I know he won't collapse. His steps are too measured. His stare is too straightforward. His fists too clenched. Still, I can feel Starfire's anxiety course through the air, it mingles with Cyborg's concern and Robin's frustration.
I have no idea what I am.
We eventually reach the common area. We all know he's going the wrong way. He should head to the infirmary. We stop. All four of us watch as he makes his way down the wrong hallway.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see Robin about to step forward. He'll make Beast Boy turn and go to the infirmary. Which is something Beast Boy should do, we need to know he's okay. We all know he isn't.
I step between Robin and his almost pursuit. I shake my head and turn. I pursue Beast Boy.
I find him in the shower. He sits on the floor, head down. He forgot to turn on the water. I don't say anything; I know better. Instead, I walk over and turn on the water for him. He flinches, it must be cold. I adjust the temperature.
I step back. I start taking off my boots and my cloak. As I look for a bar of fresh soap, I glance back. He hasn't moved.
The water is scalding when I step in. I readjust and wonder how he's stayed so perfectly still.
"Pink mist," He says.
I stare. Part of me is glad he's talking, the other part wonders if he's gone looney.
"They call it pink mist, because that's all you are if a bomb goes off in your hands. You're lucky to leave as much as a toe."
Two people were strapped with bombs today. One was a corporate suit, the other one was just a kid. Each one was on opposite sides of the city. It was a great distraction for someone who wanted to rob a bank.
The threat was that if we interfered with the robbery, he'd blow them sky high. Cyborg and Starfire went to rescue the suit, Beast Boy and I got the kid. Robin was supposed to disarm the trigger.
He didn't. He only thought he did.
Cyborg and Starfire managed to get the bomb off the suit. Robin radioed us to let us know he had disarmed it. Beast Boy told the kid that she was going to be okay. But then…
"Pink mist," I repeat.
Beast Boy nods, but doesn't move besides that. I kneel in front of him. I start lathering up the soap and applying it to his arms. He wasn't dirty, my powers had managed to save him from the explosion, but he needs it. He just does.
He does move so I can take off his uniform. We stand and I wash his back. I don't scrub him as much as rub him with soapy hands.
"Careful, you're stepping into dating territory." He says. It's a joke, but his voice is too dry for it to be funny.
"Plenty of friends wash each other." I reply. "Besides, there's nothing romantic about today."
"No, nothing romantic at all." He says.
I turn him to face me. His eyes are red and piercing. Desperate sadness pours from him. I almost lose my balance from the force.
"I told her that she was going to be okay." He whispers.
The thought that enters my head is the most un-heroic thought I have ever had. Beast Boy stares at me, waiting for me to say something. He's looking for comfort. The thought goes on repeat in my head. So I don't say it aloud, I hug him. I pull him to me and his body convulses.
Beast Boy will carry that little girl with him the rest of his life. It'll be her death rather than her life that will inspire him to be an even better than he is now. As much as this hurts him, he's here; he'll save that many more lives because of her. That is something comforting, but it's not my original thought. I hold him tighter.
Better pink mist than green.