The Apprehensive and The Optimistic

Chapter 9

All mistakes are mine

Anthony stared at his schedule, studying the classes. He heard the guidance councilor clear her throat and when Anthony looked up She was standing. Anthony awkwardly stood with her and smiled, "You'll be a great addition to this school, Anthony. I can just feel the Wolverine spirit in you!" She laughed and shook his hand.

"Right." Anthony smiled nodding his head, "Go Wolverines."

"That's a start." She laughed again, "If you find any problems with your classes don't be afraid to stop down here! Also, if you'd like to join any clubs, or sports I'll be happy to help."

"Thanks." Anthony said, nodding along with what She said, "So, I start Wednesday?"

"Yes, as long as that's no problem." She suddenly blinked, "Oh! I almost forgot," She began digging through piles of papers on her desk, "Here it is. Your bus pass, and if you'd like to drive to school just fill out this card and bring it in."

"Thank you again." Anthony said, with a light chuckle at her spastic behavior.

She sighed thoughtfully, "Are you nervous?"

"Excited, more." Anthony said, "I have a group of friends here. But..It's a lot bigger, and there's a lot more kids...so I'm a mixture of both."

She nodded, laughing, "I was scared when I started here. It gets intimidating. Who are you friends here?" Anthony listed off the name of his friends, and when he said Ian's her face went from a smile to a concerned frown, "You're friends with Mr. Hecox?" She asked, sounding a little shocked.

"Uh..Yeah." Anthony lifted an eyebrow, "Why?"

"Well, you don't seem his type." There was a tone in her voice that made Anthony uncomfortable. She sat in her seat and began organizing her papers, "I have a lot of work, Mr. Padilla. Don't forget to turn in the rest of your paper work."

Anthony slowly exited her office in shock. She went from such a happy, easy going person in a cold one in seconds. And all at the mention of Ian's name. Anthony frowned thoughtfully as he left the office and walked down the halls. Why was that? He began to wonder about Ian's school persona. The guys made it sound like Ian wasn't any different, but if that was the case, why had the guidance counselor acted so negatively? He pushed opened the double doors to the student parking lot and almost collided with a girl.

"Oh! Geez, sorry." He mumbled, blinking in shock.

The girl looked at him and smiled softly, "No problem." She looked him over and her posture grew better, She batted her eyes, "I..haven't seen you before."

Anthony blushed at her look, "Oh, uh, I'm new." He looked her over and She was pretty. Her hair was blonde and She had just enough make up on, and it was done nicely. Unlike the girls he had seen before. She wore a light coat, and a track shirt underneath. Anthony blinked at the shirt. "Wait, you're on the track team?"

"Hm?" She looked at her attire, "Oh, Yeah. I am. Are you thinking about joining?" She giggled and leaned slightly closer to him.

"Oh, uh, N-No...I have a friend in there. Did you guys..uh.. have a meeting? Or something..."

"Indoor Practice." She laughed, although it sounded a little forced, "Who's your friend? Is he as cute as you?"

"Haha...funny." Anthony looked at the floor and rubbed the back of his neck, "Hi-His name is Ian Hecox. Did he leave yet?"

The girls expression dropped from Flirty to confused, "Ian?" She looked him over and her shoulders slumped, as if She had a wave of disappointment come over her, "He didn't leave yet. If you want to catch him just wait at the railing over there." She pointed, "He always walks down that way."

"Thank you!" Anthony looked in the direction, "I'll see you..." When he went to look at the girl She had already walked quite a few feet away from him. The brown eyed man sighed, "...around?"

He walked over to the railing and sat on it. He waited patiently for any sign of Ian. He couldn't help but let his mind wonder to the girl. Why she did act like that at the mention of Ian's name? Was everyone at this school like that? Maybe Ian wasn't as popular as Anthony originally thought. But Anthony couldn't fathom people not liking Ian, he was great. What wasn't to like? Ian was nice, and thoughtful, funny as hell, he had great stories to pass time, and he was Good looking. Weren't those all keys to popularity?

Pieces of the puzzle began to fit in his head. The way Ian called the football players jerks, the face he made when he heard Anthony was friends with Trevor, maybe Ian wasn't popular. Anthony felt concern grow in his chest. Was Ian bullied? It wouldn't surprise Anthony that much. Now looking at the way Ian reacted to things, how easily he could be set off. It was a logical assumption.

Anthony lifted a hand to his chest. Why did it hurt so bad to think about? He sighed and shut his eyes, Ian wasn't going to get picked on anymore, not while Anthony went to school here. He didn't care if the kids decided to pick on him too, he liked and cared about Ian. Not only that but Ian was his best friend, and he didn't want anyone to hurt him. Not even himself. "I swear." He mumbled to the cool California air, I'll protect you, or my name isn't-

"Anthony?!" The taller teen looked up and saw Ian. He had a backpack on one shoulder and stared in shock. He had a hoodie tied around his waist, plain tee shirt on, exposed to the light breeze, and jeans which were ripped slightly and faded, "What're you doing here?!"

Anthony smiled, seeing Ian with a school bag made him look much younger than he actually was, "Oh..uh, I had to talk to your guidance counselor. I have a...research paper. And I wanted to know if I could sign out books from the library here..."

Ian lifted an eyebrow suspiciously, "Uh, couldn't you just find all your info online?"

"I have an old, traditional English teacher. She doesn't believe in technology." Anthony wasn't lying. His English teacher at private school was a traditional woman who despised technology.

"That sucks." Ian nodded, then he grinned and jumped on the railing sitting next to him, "David's picking me up, and we're going to the movies. You should come along."

Anthony blinked, "Oh..um..I don't think that's a good-"

Ian phone buzzed and pulled it out of his pocket, "Oh, It's David." He answered the call, "Hey, babe." Anthony rolled his eyes at the pet name and frowned at Ian. He was not going as a third wheel on Ian's and David's date. That would be the biggest punch in the face in history. Ian hummed, "I just got done. I found Anthony too! I was thinking he could come to the movies with us." Anthony noticed as Ian was on the phone with David the giant grin he had faltered more and more, "What? Well...that's just..." His eyebrows furrowed, "Well can you at least drive him home? He doesn't have a-" Ian went quiet and then rolled his eyes scoffing, "David, come on, this is the third-" Ian went quiet again, listening to what David was saying, he sighed, "Sorry, sorry. I know you're busy with college...Don't worry, I'll call my mom, or Josh." Ian jumped off the railing and kicked a rock, "Yeah, Yeah. I, uh," He paused and stuffed his free hand in his pocket, "...care about you too. Be safe." He pulled the phone from his ear and clicked end call.

Anthony jumped off the railing too and frowned at Ian, "You okay?" He lifted a hand to Ian's shoulder and squeezed.

Ian smiled some and shrugged, "I'm making a big deal out of nothing," He crossed his arms over his chest, "It's just...David's been canceling a lot on me. And...I'm worried agreeing to be his boyfriend is making it worse...like It's too late."

Anthony pulled Ian into his chest and wrapped his arms around him, Ian stood there and slowly lifted his arms to Anthony's shirt and gripped it tightly in his fists. Ian let out a sigh and buried his face into the area where Anthony's shoulder and neck met. The taller teen wanted to say something like, 'David won't leave you.' Or 'Don't worry, you and David will be fine.' But he couldn't bring himself to do it. He just squeezed Ian closer and inhaled the scent of him. He smelled like sweat and Irish Spring, and Anthony let out a content sigh and shut his eyes.

Ian's released a warm breath on Anthony's breath that caused him to shudder pleasantly, "This is why..." He mumbled and Anthony barely heard it.

"Why what...?" He opened his eyes and pulled away.

Ian sighed, and leaned back, his hands stilled fisted in Anthony shirt. He looked up and smiled, "Don't worry about." His grip lightened and his hands just rested Anthony's chest, Ian said, "I'll call Josh. Do you wanna hang out for a little? Maybe all three of us can go to the arcade."

Anthony blushed. He had to try so hard not to lean down and kiss Ian. Felix had talked about waiting for the perfect moment, and this felt like it. The moment. Anthony moistened his lips and forced himself to take a step away from Ian, he couldn't do it, "Um, how about we all go to the movies? I'll text Mari and you can text Josh and Matt."

Ian smile grew, "That's a great idea! Josh can pick us-"

Anthony cut him off, "We'll meet there, You and I can go together and then they can car pool there."

"Okay..." Ian lifted an eyebrow, "One problem; How do we get to my house and car? We're trapped here."

Anthony chuckled, "I got a car. My dad got me one since he missed my birthday."

Ian's jaw dropped, "DUDE! That is amazing!" He took out his phone, "Let the texting and planning commence!"

Anthony chuckled, opening the message to reply. 'No, not like that. We're going with friends.' He sent it and leaned back in his seat. They stopped at Ian's house so he could change. All the plans were set. Mari, Josh, and Matt were going to join them. They were going to meet at the cinema at seven, but he and Ian were going out to eat, and going window shopping at the mall to blow off time. Anthony's phone buzzed and he opened the message from Felix.

'Suuure, Ant. Lets go with that. You like him and that's that. So this is a start to the whole romance.'

Anthony shook his head, typing his response, 'Yeah, I like him. But he's not gonna find out, and there won't be a romance.'

Almost immediately he got a reply, 'You like him. Tell him. Stop coming up with excuses, you fucking loser.'

Anthony frowned and itched his cheek. His caught his bottom lip with his teeth, 'Confessing isn't that simple, man.' He sat up and messed with the radio, changing stations and messing with the volume. He groaned and plugged his phone in, blasting music from his phone. He opened the message the second he got it from Felix.

'You're making this crush more complex then it should be. It is simple.'

Anthony sighed, 'No where close to simple. It's different from normal crushes. I don't even care what bullshit story you come up with to prove me wrong d:'

Just then the passenger door was pulled open and Anthony set his phone on the dashboard. Ian sat down, and grinned, "Ready?"

Anthony cleared his throat and motioned to his own seat belt. Ian rolled his eyes, but grabbed the belt and buckled it. Anthony laughed and smiled at Ian. The bowl haired teen had changed into a rather nice pair of jeans, he wore the jacket Anthony bought him, with a plaid shirt underneath. He obviously combed through his hair and redid it, because it wasn't as messy anymore. He had put on cologne too. His scent was quick to fill the car, Anthony couldn't help but lean closer to him when he spoke, "You know, you got pretty fancied up for a couple of friends going to the movies."

"Oh, well, y'know," He shrugged and adjusted his collar smirking, "We are going out to dinner, and the mall beforehand. So I figure if anyone sees us and thinks we're boyfriends, I'll be the better looking one."

Anthony shook his head and removed the stick from park to drive, "Whatever."

Ian laughed and grabbed Anthony's phone from the dash, changing the music and setting it back up there. They talked about minor things, school, work. Nothing big. Anthony actually found out Ian worked at Chuck E Cheese as the mascot, which he hadn't known before. Ian would change the song every now and then, Anthony had gotten into the topic of his step mom when Ian gasped out of no where. Anthony pulled into the parking lot, "What?" He asked curiously.

Ian looked at him, in shock, "Wait..." He glanced at his phone, "You like someone? A guy?" He looked at Anthony.

Anthony's body moved before his brain could actually process the situation, he slammed on the brakes and snatched the phone from Ian, unplugging it from the car. "I-Ignore what you saw!"

Ian was still in shock at how quickly he hit the brakes, his hand on the dashboard, other on his chest. He frowned at Anthony, "Dude, what the fuck!? You don't do that!" He groaned and sat back.

The car behind them honked and Anthony flushed and drove, parking in the closest spot he could find. He unbuckled his seat belt and looked at Ian, "I'm sorry, Ian. Seriously."

"Whatever," He sighed, unbuckling his own seat belt and getting out of the car, Anthony followed in suite, locking his car. He jogged to catch up to Ian, "C'mon, I really am sorry."

Ian nodded, "Yeah. Just don't get all upset next time."

Anthony frowned, "Um, you were the one going through my texts, Ian." He felt himself grab for his phone on instinct, letting out a sigh of relief when he felt it, "I won't do it as long as you don't randomly invade my privacy."

Ian scoffed and let out a chuckle. Shaking his head. Anthony could tell he was annoyed but he ignore it. Ian was in the wrong, and sure, he wanted to beg for forgiveness, but in reality, he didn't do anything wrong. Ian shouldn't have been snooping. They walked into the Mexican place and got their table. They ordered their drinks and as the lady walked away, Ian sighed, "Look, I'm sorry. Your Felix friend said something about his bullshit story helping you win him over, and I couldn't help myself." He itched his head, "You'd snoop too."

"Yeah, I guess your right." He clutched onto the fabric of his jeans. The women came back with their drinks and took their orders before walking off again, Anthony sipped his drink.

Ian stared at him, and leaned forward. "Well, who is he? I feel like an idiot for thinking you liked me the other day." He made a motion with his hand, before resting his head on it.

Anthony scoffed, if only you knew, "It's no one. Just...a guy that I deliver to once in a while."

"Details man, details! How long, what's his name, what's he look like?" Ian smirked and took a drink of his own drink. Anthony sighed, cheeks warming. He really didn't want to do this. Come up with a bullshit lie and do this to Ian again. He regretted his first lie, and he didn't want to regret another. "Oh." Anthony looked up from lap to see Ian's guilty expression, "I'm sorry, Anthony. I didn't realize...I'm sorry, it's none of my business."

Anthony felt his chest ache, "I...don't even know if I like him." He said bluntly, "Don't feel guilty. I'm new to the...liking a guy thing."

Ian blinked, "Oh, okay..." He smiled, "You know, I happen to be gay." He put a hand on his chest, "If your worried, or curious about anything, I am here for you." He shrugged his shoulders, "If you have any questions, I can try my hardest to answer them."

Anthony smiled, and messed with the straw in his glass. He could ask Ian, this was the perfect opportunity to find out everything he'd been wondering about, not only that, but he could get to know things about Ian. Learn about his experiences, and his past. Ian was sensitive, so flat out asking was out of the question, this was the simple way to get answers. Anthony looked up at Ian, who was messing with the business cards, "Uh... can you buy your boyfriend flowers? Or stuffed animals? Or is that weird?" He asked lamely, blushing.

Ian looked at Anthony, folding the card in half and smiling, "Yeah, why wouldn't you be able to? Maybe on a first date or something? Valentines day, anniversaries. Whatever. Stuffed animals are cute. Or at least I think so."

"Has a guy ever gotten you flowers?" Anthony followed up his question, tapping a beat on the table in attempt to will away his nerves.

"Mm," Ian nodded his head, "My first boyfriend, Ryan, got me flowers a lot. David's only done it twice, on our first actual date. And, well, another time..." He chuckled, "I remember my first girlfriend, I always got her flowers. Every time I went to her house." He covered his face in embarrassment, "I was a horrible 12 year old."

"That's cute. I didn't know you dated a girl." Anthony smiled, brushing his bangs from his eyes.

"Melanie." Ian removed his hands, grinning like an idiot, "We still talk a lot. She was my best friend until I moved, it was because we were such good friends that we broke up." Ian grabbed his phone, and went through it, holding it out to Anthony, "That's the woman herself."

Anthony smiled as he squinted at the picture, She was blonde and gorgeous and Anthony pictured them together. The image was easy to imagine. He chuckled, "How can someone that beautiful date you?"

"I dunno," He said and looked at the picture before he set his phone down, "But I was lucky. We didn't do anything though, we dated for like a month, but we were 12 and I still kind of thought she had coodies. She got really mad when she kissed me on the cheek at the park and I wiped it away and ran up to my mom crying." Ian laughed fondly.

Anthony laughed as he recreated the scene in his head, "I would be mad too, Ian. That's a dick move!"

"I was 12! C'mon," Ian itched his stubble as he laughed, "And I wouldn't go crying to my mom if you kissed me."

"What would you do?" Anthony said without thinking, he felt his cheeks warm and he covered his mouth. Ian's cheeks warmed as well and Anthony opened his mouth to come up with some excuse when their waitress set their plates in from of them. She told them to enjoy before walking away. Anthony grabbed his utensils and shoved a fork full of food into his mouth. He chewed it slowly, and Ian seemed to do the same thing, staring at his food. "Well, um, what about that Ryan guy? He was your first boyfriend?" He said after he swallowed his mouth full of food.

"Yeah," Ian said sipping his drink, "We started dating my ninth grade year. He doesn't go to school here, but I met him through a couple of friends where I use to leave."

"..I thought you started dating David your ninth grade year?"

"Ryan and I were dating in the summer, until like, January, I dunno." He sighed, "Well, I thought we were dating, but apparently we weren't."

Anthony chuckled, "You seem to have a lot of relationships like that."

Ian didn't laugh or smile, he just stared at Anthony, and shrugged, "Well, at least David has feelings for me. Ryan...well, he would act like we were boyfriends, then I caught him with a girl. And He...he..." Ian sighed and shook his head, "Well, without getting into details, he made it clear we were never official and that, uh, I was just one of those guys he hung out with." He sipped his drink again.

Anthony frowned and stared at his half eaten meal, he didn't feel hungry anymore, "Are you saying...he used you for...?" He couldn't even say it, it felt so disgusted.

Ian sighed, "It never got that far." Anthony looked at Ian and released the breath he was holding, "It would've gotten to that, though. I was an idiot for thinking we were an item." He scoffed bitterly and took a bite of his food.

"You weren't an idiot, that guy was an asshat."

Ian chuckled softly, "Yeah, I mean, we're good now. He changed a lot since then, and he's chill now. Someone did the same thing to him and he learned."

"Justice." Anthony nodded, grinning, he lifted his drink and Ian rolled his eyes but gave Anthony the satisfactory of a toast. Anthony sat the glass down after he took his drink and took a bite of his meal, "Um, personal question alert." Ian looked ta him, munching on his own food, "Have you ever...done that stuff?"

Ian's cheeks warmed to the lightest shade of pink, and he wiped his mouth with a napkin, "David and I have done it three times." He answered honestly, with a nod, "We don't normally go all the way, but we have been together for a while. And, we both want to spend the rest of our lives together, so why not try it?" He had a strange look I his eyes when he said he wanted to spend the rest of his life with David, "Um, I've never bottomed though. It seems really personal and well...I don't think I can submit myself to something like that with another person." His cheeks warmed more and he sighed softly.

"I wouldn't bottom." Anthony said, although he was clueless when it came to gay sex, he did understood the gist of what went where, "It's gross."

Ian laughed, "Yeah, maybe. I don't think it's gross. Just personal." He took a bite of his food, "Mm, topping is awesome though. So if you decide to try it at all, you won't be disappointed." Ian tapped his fork against his plate, chewing on his bottom lip, "David wants us to switch it up, he's thinking we do that around Christmas. I'm nervous, but I agreed."

Anthony blinked, "Oh...are you okay with that?"

"It doesn't matter if I'm okay with it." Ian sighed, itching his stubble again, "I owe him it, he's gone through a lot of crap with me. It's the least I could do."

Anthony scoffed, "You don't actually believe that do you?" He shifted in his seat, "I don't care if you're dating the person for a week, or for four years. You say no if you're not ready. You don't owe David anything, Ian. I get you might feel guilty and all, I see the look on your face when you call him your boyfriend, but don't for a second think that you can fix everything by making yourself do something you know your uncomfortable with. That's something extremely personal, like you said, and when you decide you want to do that you should be a hundred and ten percent ready. You have to love and care for that person as much as they love and care about you. I bet if you told David you weren't ready, he wouldn't force you into it. So don't think you're less if you say no."

Ian stared at Anthony, he smiled softly, "You're just..you're a genius you know that?"

Anthony gave a bashful smile, "I'm just honest."

Ian nodded his head, "You're a lot of things, Anthony. A lot of things." His smile grew, "I wish I could tell you a quarter of them."

"W-Why can't you?" Anthony asked, leaning towards Ian in anticipation.

Ian smirked and glanced around the restaurant. He lifted his hand, waving the waitress over, "Check, please."

Anthony frowned, "Ian, seriously, don't blow me off."

Ian chuckled and shook his head at Anthony, "I'll do what I want, man. Maybe I'll tell you one day."

AHHH THE APRIL FOOLS JOKE YESTERDAY

haha, how many of you guys watched the whole thing? When Ian threw the tempter tantrum over the basket ball was the best.

Thanks for reading!