The Apprehensive and The Optimistic
AN:: After this chapter I'll be taking an hiatus until May 7th. Thanks for reading, an I'll see you guys in a few weeks. :)
Chapter 11
Anthony parked down the street and locked his car before exiting it. He crossed the street and went towards Ian's apartment, walking as fast as possible. Rain was pouring down from the sky, and soaking through his clothes quickly. Anthony jogged and tucked himself under the cover of the apartment porch. He shivered as he clicked 304, waiting for an answer. Ian hadn't been in school at all, and it was Friday night. Anthony had texted him and called him, getting no response. No one seemed to know what happened, besides Josh. He mentioned Ian telling him to get his work for him, but when someone asked why he wasn't here, he refused to answer. Anthony took the work from him, saying he would deliver it, Josh gave him a weird look, but handed over the folder regardless.
"Yes?" Ian's mom's voice asked and Anthony blinked, normally Ian answered, but Anthony shouldn't have been shocked it wasn't him.
"Uh, hi Cheryl." Anthony smiled a little, despite the fact he couldn't even see her, "I, uh, I want to see Ian, can you let me in?"
She was quiet for a few minutes, before she sighed, "My son told me he doesn't want to see anyone, Anthony, I'm sorry. He said only Josh was allowed in, because had his school work"
Anthony blinked in shock, "P-Please." He mumbled into the speaker, "I-I wanna see him really bad...I wanna help. Josh is busy, he gave me his school work, ask him!" He didn't want to seem pathetic, but he wanted nothing more than to help Ian out of whatever he was in. It was obviously more than a sickness.
Cheryl sighed again, "Fine. But I'm not going to be here when he flips because I let you in. You're on your own."
The door clicked, and Anthony mumbled a thank you and pulled it open, moving quickly through the hall and into the elevator. He clicked three, and tapped his foot as he waited. It seemed like it took forever and he chewed his bottom lip, clicking the elevator button again, thinking that would help. When he actually got out, Ian's mom was standing outside the door. Anthony shifted his bag on his shoulder, and smiled, "Thanks again."
She held out the key to the apartment, "Of course, Anthony. Lock the door when you get in there." She frowned suddenly, "He's...not himself, okay? He's depressed and angry, so don't let anything he says get to you okay?" She smiled and patted his shoulder, "Ian really likes you, and if he hurts you, he doesn't mean it."
Anthony felt his chest swell as he took the key, "I'll help him."
"I know you will." Cheryl chuckled fondly, "If he asks, tell him I went to James' house." And she went into the elevator, waving at him as the doors closed.
Anthony walked down the hall and opened the door to the apartment. It was dark. You could hear a soft mumbling coming from Ian's room, and there was the sound of rain pounding against the window. He locked the door and set the key on the small table near the door. He slid off his shoes and went to the bathroom, changing out of his wet clothes and into dry ones. He left the bathroom and dropped his bag on the floor in the living room before slowly walking down the hall to Ian's room. He sighed, and rested his ear against the wood. The mumbling wasn't Ian, it was the TV. He turned the handle and slowly opened the door, peaking in.
Ian was sitting against the wall, like they did when they played video games, and he stared blankly at the screen. He had the covers tight against him, and a box of tissues at his side. Maybe he as sick? His face was barely visible, but when Ian turned toward the door Anthony could see the redness around his eyes. Anthony felt his chest tighten in pain, "Why're you here?" Ian asked, his voice was hoarse, and he paused the show on the TV, so the only sound as the rain against the window, it seemed to fit perfectly.
"I...was worried about you." Anthony took a step into his room.
"Well stop worrying." Ian said, and looked at the screen again, "And leave while your at it. If my mom thinks you can help me, you can't." His tone wasn't hateful, or sad, he just talked in monotone. With no expression on his face at all.
Anthony ignored the stabbing feeling he got from what Ian said, and shut the door behind him, "How do you know?" He put a knee on Ian's bed the other man's head snapped in his direction.
"I don't know, and I don't want to find out! Just go!" Anthony froze, one knee on the bed and the other awkwardly positioned. Ian's never raised his voice like that, and Anthony felt himself grow angry and frustrated, but he tried to push the feelings away as he climbed on the bed, "Fucking hell, do you speak English? I said just fucking go away, Anthony! I don't want you." He never added a here, he just said he didn't want him. That really hurt and Anthony sighed softly as he sat beside Ian, he just kept repeating what Ian's mom told him, 'Ian really likes you, and if he hurts you, he doesn't mean it.' Ian suddenly sniffed, "J-Just go, Anthony! Leave me alone."
Anthony turned and looked at Ian, he was getting worked up, Anthony noticed the corner of his eyes overfilling with tears, "Ian..." The tears fell out and Ian let a broken sob out and his whole world split in two, he wrapped his arms tightly around Ian and the other squeezed back, sobbing. He squeezed his eyes tight and rubbed his back. After a few minutes, the sobbing subsided, and Anthony pulled away some. Ian rubbed his nose and smiled shyly. Anthony smiled back, and lifted a hand, "C-Can I...?" He stared into Ian's eyes and slowly wiped away the tear streaks from his cheeks. His heart was racing and he brushed Ian's hair from his eyes, his lips parting slightly.
"I'm sorry." Ian said, and leaned into Anthony's touch.
The brown eyed man blushed, feeling slightly awkward as Ian nuzzled his hand, "O-Oh..no..it's okay." Ian's hand lifted and he rested his palm on the back of Anthony hand, holding it against his cheek, "I-uh-I heard you weren't in school..."
Ian sighed, "I got a cold and was sick Tuesday and Wednesday, David came over and he was taking care of me."
"That's good..." He mumbled, Anthony's eyes falling onto Ian's lips as he talked. He took notice just how pink, and plump they really were.
"No...It's not. We ended up fighting." Ian took Anthony's hand from his cheek and held it in both of his hands, staring at it, and running his fingers over it, making Anthony feel even more awkward, but there were pleasant butterflies in the pit of his stomach, "That's all we ever do. Fight. Tch," Ian scoffed and shook his head bitterly, "He was pissed I went to the movies with all of you, I told him it was his own fault," Ian said, "Then he said he wouldn't have canceled on me if I never ditch him for you."
"You didn't ditch him, though. We just, kinda, found each other." He looked back into Ian's eyes.
"We did didn't we?" Ian chuckled, "Well, anyway, long story short, we argued and David said that my interests weren't placed him any more and we split. We broke up. We're over." His voice wavered and he shifted closer to Anthony, "He broke up with me already. And people wonder why I have commitment issues. Two years down the drain, and he left me because of assumptions. He didn't trust me enough. Two years." He shifted again, and layed back, against his mound of pillows, Anthony's hand still in his. Ian sighed and tugged Anthony toward him, "I don't even care."
Anthony moved forward, sitting beside Ian's form, his heart racing. They broke up? He felt so many emotions he couldn't pick just one. It was odd, but knowing they left each other he wasn't as happy as he thought he would be. He imagined something like this happening, actually having a chance with Ian, but now that it was here, all Anthony felt was guilt. Ian didn't say it exactly, but the main reason Ian and David broke up was because of him. David was threatened by their friendship. And he knew that Anthony felt more than friendship, not only that, but he felt Ian had something more for Anthony as well. Anthony cleared his throat, "Y-You do care, Ian. And it's okay. It was two years of your life, it's okay to hurt."
Ian sighed, grabbing the remote and turning off the TV, the room became black. Only lights coming from outside the window, "I never thought we would..." Ian shifted, and rolled to his side, "We made plans for ourselves after I graduated." He looked up at Anthony, "We never told anyone, but we were gonna run away, get away from everything. My dad, his stepdad. Just...everyone who hurt us." Ian confessed and Anthony felt horrible. Anthony slowly lifted his hand put it on Ian's head, the man flinched, but he didn't tear his hand away like he normally did. Anthony ran his fingers through Ian's hair. The blue eyed man sighed contently, "Lay with me?"Anthony blushed again, he didn't say anything. He grabbed the few pillows scattered on the bed and put them at the top, and layed down besides Ian, moving his hand to pull the covers over them. As he did so, Ian slide closer to him, he took Anthony's arm and wrapped it around himself, tucking his arms between his body and Anthony's. He rested his hands on Anthony's chest, curling his fingers in Anthony shirt.
Anthony smiled a little, and pulled Ian as close as possible, "You'll be okay. Even if it's over between you and David. You have friends, and your mom."
"You're right." Ian said, and yawned, "Yeah...I have you too."
Anthony nodded, smiling warmly, "Right." Ian's breath slowed, and Anthony shut his eyes, he took the chance and brushed his lips against Ian's forehead, and when Ian didn't yell at him for it he placed a second kiss in the same spot,"You'll always have me"
Ian shifted, tangling their legs together, "Thanks, 'nthony. 'M sorry."
Anthony shrugged, and nuzzled his nose into Ian's hair. He didn't care if they were cuddling just because Ian felt lonely, he was just happy to have Ian's warmth back. He liked the feeling of Ian's curves pressed against his own, and Ian 's breath on his collar bone was the most relaxing thing he ever felt in his whole life. He just enjoyed the moment, and soon fell asleep with Ian.
Anthony's eyes snapped open, and he frowned, wondering what awoke him, he sighed and slid his eyes shut, pulling Ian closer. Before he could get comfortable his pants vibrated. He furrowed his eyebrows, and the groaned, reaching his hand into his pocket, and pulled out his phone, clicking answer, "Mm, hello?"
"Where are you?" His mother's voice made his eyes snap open and he shifted, sitting up, leaning against the wall.
"Ian's...sorry, you woke me up." He rubbed his eyes tiredly. Ian groaned and shifted resting his head on Anthony's hips, then he layed one of his arms across Anthony's legs. The brown eyed man smiled, resting his hand on the others head.
"You didn't leave a note, or text me, or call me. What are you doing? When did you leave? Why?"
"Too many questions." He lowered his voice, to try to stop Ian from waking up, "I left around seven or eight last night, Ian wasn't in school so I was worried about him." He sighed, running his fingers through his hair, "We just talked for a while, and I accidentally passed out with him. I'm sorry."
"What do you mean with him? This is ridiculous!" She sounded angry and Anthony didn't understand why. He hadn't really done anything wrong, sure he forgot to get a hold of her, but that was it.
"What do you mean?" He countered, "He fell asleep. That's it. Done." He didn't mean to get an attitude but he just felt his mom was getting pissed about nothing.
"You know what I mean, Anthony." She said, "I'm not going to spell it out."
"Why do you have to be like this? We fell asleep after talking, I seem to be the one who has to spell it out."
"Fine." She snapped, "I'm asking you flat out; is something between you and that boy? I will not have my son doing-"
"Your son will make his own decisions!" He raised his voice and Ian stirred in his sleep, "And if I decide to go down that path, oh well. We're not having this conversation now, I'll be home Sunday." He pulled his phone from his ear and hung up. He sighed. He hated fighting with his mom, but something was wrong with her. She never acted like this before, and he wasn't going to be bullied by his own mother. He looked at Ian and pushed him some. Ian groaned and slid off Anthony, turning away from him. Anthony layed back down, and pulled Ian back towards him.
"Fuckin hell." Ian mumbled, and turned, resting his head on Anthony's chest, "For just tellin' your mom you're makin' your own decisions you're..." He yawned, "Mm, bein' indecisive,"
Anthony sighed, "You heard that?"
"Yeah.." He wrapped an arm around Anthony' waist, "Why does everyone think we're foolin' around?"
"A guy can't be friends with a gay guy, I guess?" Anthony suggested.
Ian chuckled, "Feel kinda bad we're lettin' 'em all down, huh?"
Anthony smiled, his fingers found there way into Ian's hair. Now that Ian let him do it, he never wanted to stop. His hair was thick, and soft, and it just felt nice to run his hand through the bowl cut, "If anyone walked in now I think it would all but confirm we're doing something."
Ian chuckled, "I wouldn't be shocked if that happened, especially with our luck." He wrapped his arm tighter around Anthony's waist, "I don' t care though. I've always wanted this."
Anthony blinked, and blushed, "Y-You have?" He was in shock, and disbelief. Ian's wanted this?
"Mhm," He nodded, "A best friend, and just all around cuddle buddy. I mean. hell, can't people do this and not worry about feelings and shit? Yes please."
"Oh." Anthony frowned, hand slipping from Ian's hair. There he went again, being a selfish idiot.
Ian shifted, sitting up, and smiling down at Anthony. And sure, Anthony always thought Ian was attractive, but seeing him in the morning? His hair wasn't a bowl cut anymore, it was disheveled and sticking up in random places, and he had a lazy smile on his lips, Anthony loved the look, "Thanks for last night. Sorry I was being a douche."
"You've said sorry like ten times." Anthony smirked.
"Nuh-uh." Ian pouted, "But really, I am. I was pissed..." He shrugged.
Anthony chuckled, "Well..we're awake now huh? What d'you say we go get some food?"
Ian nodded, and stretched, "As much as I just want to lay down, you have a point. I need to text Josh to bring over my homework too. You spending the night again?"
"I have work at five. I get off at nine though, I'll come by then?" Anthony asked, "I brought your work over, Josh had stuff to do."
"Deal." He hopped out of bed, "Entertain yourself, I have to shower." He walked to his dresser and pulled out some clothes, then exited his room.
AN:: IT'S SHORT I KNOW IM SORRY I LOVE ALL LIKE 5 OF YOU I SWEAR. I had more to add, but I thought it'd fit better in the next chapter, im really sorry. This chapter is the point where I have no clue how to get to the parts I plan to okay? I have like major plot points set in the fic, and it's hard getting there, man. See you all in a few weeks.