Chapter 30

She and Her

"Is that really necessary?"

"There's no telling who he is right now."

"He's your friend."

"He could wake up and decide to attack us."

"You don't know that."

"And neither do you."

Sam watched Chelsea and Steve bicker for only a moment, "We were lucky to even get out of there." he offered, trying to get them to calm down.

It didn't help, "You two got out on luck. I got out by a miracle, otherwise I'd be on The Raft right now waiting for my treason trial that would never come."

"I wouldn't have left you there." Steve tried.

"Oh no? So you didn't tunnel vision and leave me dumped in some room where 'at least I was safe' while you ran off to save the man who was only in danger because you couldn't listen to me!"

The blonde chose to walk away and Sam stepped in front of the woman before she could yell after him again. It didn't matter anyway, as she was trying not to double over from the strain.

"That was unfair and you know it. They would have found him no matter what."

She could only shake her head, the pain easing, "I'm just so angry."

"Embarrassed." he corrected her.

"Sam…"

Her warning tone didn't waver him. He just watched her with that smirk like he knew some juicy secret.

She sighed and walked over to Bucky who was still passed out, arm pinned to restrain him. She touched his cheek gently with the back of her fingers, "I am embarrassed. No one would know where he was if it hadn't been for me."

"I thought he reached out to you."

She only looked at him, truly unsure of what to say next. But she looked scared.

Sam decided to continue before he thought about it too hard, "They programmed him into you, not the other way around."

"That's– "

They startled when Bucky jerked awake suddenly. The man called out for Steve and Chelsea tried to back away, but Bucky's free hand wrapped around the back of her thigh as he pressed his forehead to her side, trying to calm his dizziness.

His grip was tight but loosened quickly and she adjusted down to his level, settling on a stray plastic crate as he gathered himself. She smiled as he focused on her face and he felt sucked in until movement over her shoulder pulled his attention. He seemed surprised to see the newest person in the room.

"Steve."

The Avenger was understandably wary, "Which Bucky am I talking to?"

"Is it not obvious?" Chelsea stood and snapped at the blonde but Bucky's hand on her leg again, gently this time, quieted her.

"Your mom's name was Sarah." He took a moment to think of something else, "You used to wear newspapers in your shoes." he chuckled.

Steve took a moment to laugh a touch as well, "Can't read that in a museum."

"Just like that we're supposed to be cool?"

"Will you stop?" the woman snapped.

Bucky looked up at Chelsea as she stood and walked away, then over at Steve, "What did I do?" He asked.

"Enough."

His eyes closed calmly and he took a deep controlled breath, "I knew this would happen." he sounded tired and broken, "Everything that Hydra put inside me is still there. All he had to do was say the goddamn words."

"Who was he?"

"I don't know."

"People are dead. The bombing, the setup…"

"Whoever he is, James, he did a lot of damage just to get to you."

Steve sighed, "I need you to do better than 'I don't know', Buck."

He took a moment to think a little harder, past the fog, "He wanted to know about Siberia. Where I was kept. He wanted to know exactly where."

The other occupants of the room were confused and Steve asked, "Why would he want to know that?"

"Because I'm not the only Winter Soldier."

Chelsea let out a bark of laughter in disbelief and strode over to hit the release lever on the machine they'd had the man pinned in, "Maybe we should have started with this news."

Bucky told them about the murder of the Starks; what it was really for.

It had been less about killing them and more about taking what they had. They were transporting more of the serum that made Steve; made him the Winter Soldier.

There were six more super soldiers like him in a deep sleep in some bunker in Siberia.

Steve and Sam wandered off to strategize, and Chelsea sat with Bucky.

"You don't need to be part of that?" He gestured with his chin to the men chatting in hushed tones.

She chuckled dryly, "I wasn't even supposed to be part of this. Whatever it is."

"Why not?"

The woman slid her eyes to him, teasingly stern, "I retired."

James Barnes chuckled, "I'm the old one here. Why would you retire?"

Chelsea started to go through her regular answer of being tired topped with a general feeling of mediocrity; but instead she went with the truth, "Being Avenger adjacent wasn't a good fit."

Despite their surroundings and general predicament, James found himself grinning at the woman. Feeling utterly safe right here with her, "I'm sure you'll find something better."

The woman continued to smirk at him as he pulled her plastic crate closer, "We'll see about that. What are you doing?"

"When's the next time I can be close to you?"

A strange panic settled in her chest and Chelsea flickered her gaze to Sam and Steve. Still plotting.

"Being close is what caused all this."

He dropped his volume so only she could hear and leaned so their foreheads touched, "I needed you."

"Don't tell me that." she chuckled, "The brainwashing gave me enough of a complex as it is."

The man just watched her face for a little longer before saying, "I don't want us to get separated again."

Chelsea felt her chest get light with happiness before her stomach dropped and pain shot up her side. She winced lightly, trying to not alarm him, "I can't fight. But I promise I will be right behind you."

His expression changed and she halted him before he could ask with, "Wherever."

"Chelsea."

Steve called her name so clearly it startled her to hear it. He watched her leave his childhood friend and you would think they'd never see each other again for how they gazed at each other.

How the other man held her hand until the distance between them wouldn't allow it.

It would have made him happy on any other occasion, but this had been the week of all weeks.

Not to mention that he loved her too.

"I need to update you on the plan."

"Please don't."

"C'mon Jones, we need everyone we have."

"But you don't have me. I'm retired remember? I couldn't even hold my own on that rooftop and now…" she gestured down at her bandages and she was still very much holding herself as though she was in pain and tired. "I'm not going to be of any use to you."

"You were just mad at me a little while ago for leaving you behind." he couldn't help but tease.

"Well I would hope our friendship doesn't hinge on how much use we are to each other."

He frowned, "That's not what I meant."

"I know, I know…"

The man clenched his hands into fists before flexing his fingers and reaching out for her arms, just below her shoulders. The hold was gentle, but even at arms length it was strong. The woman felt like he was lifting some of her weight and she was grateful.

He grinned a touch when she offered her own small smile, "Are we still friends?"

She chuckled, "Four months of silence unfortunately comes off as the opposite, but yes, we are still friends."

"Then can you trust me with his life again? Without you there?"

Despite this being her own decision, and a good one at that, she couldn't help but feel like she was being benched.

But what she had realized four months ago was that she was never expected to step up with the Avengers after her ordeal. More strength made her feel like she needed to use it, and ever since she'd been less than successful, less than useful, in every situation.

The Great Crusade was long dead.

"I think you'll have an easier time protecting him when I'm not around."

He started to say something about the self deprecating air of her statement when Sam called out, snapping the cellphone he'd been on in half. "She's in."

Chelsea closed her eyes and tried to calm herself with a deep breath, "I hope he's talking about Natasha, but I know he isn't."

"She helped us get out of there..." Steve started before Sam wandered over to continue.

"She's going to bring our gear."

The woman pouted like a teenage girl, utterly annoyed, "She put us all inside in the first place."

"Things have changed."

Chelsea couldn't put her finger on why, but this shift in dynamics pissed her off.

"If you say so."

"Simple exchange. We get our gear and we keep moving, we've got people to meet."

"Oh?"

Sam chuckled, "You didn't think the three of us were taking this on alone?"

The woman couldn't help but smile a touch and shrugged as Bucky approached. She reached out for his hand and rubbed the metal with her thumb even though he couldn't feel it, "I guess I can stick around for a long see you later."

Her hands were sweating. The heavy weapons in the trunk clanked and thunked with every bump she ran over and every turn she made, no matter how smoothly. Her eyes slid to the review mirror constantly, trying to mask the urge to dart around, and she just couldn't seem to relax.

That was three times now that Sharon Carter allowed herself to feel this.

At the church, before the funeral.

In that holding room with Chelsea Jones.

Right now.

She took a left and rolled to the underside of the overpass slowly. At the sight of an old beetle she rolled her fingers in succession on the wheel; still sweaty.

Chelsea was with them. That's what this new feeling had in common. All her nerves on end, something breathing down her back, something making her so mad. It was a who.

Sharon pulled ahead and parked, allowing herself to breathe a moment when she spotted Steve, and only Steve. She plastered a smirk on her face and stepped out, "I think you misunderstood the concept of a get-away car."

He chuckled as he approached, "It's low profile."

"Is that what it is?"

The confidence was well played but her hands shook. She busied them by opening the trunk, "Retrieving these wasn't easy. But it's the least I can do."

"I appreciate it."

The woman couldn't really helped what she said next, "I? Not we?" her eyes moved over to the small car quickly.

Steve frowned, "This is pretty complicated."

"No kidding. This is not how I imagined this going."

He wanted to ask if she imagined Chelsea and Bucky going away forever. Some world where whoever was left seemingly free under the accords would be happy. Instead he went with, "Will you chase her?"

"Her? Not them?" she chuckled in false amusement, "No." She didn't need to think about it and she definitely sounded as annoyed as she now felt, "What would chasing her do for a fugitive like me?"

"Right. I'm sorry. I don't understand your relationship."

"There isn't one."

"That's a shame."

"I guess it is."

Sam watched the exchange at the other car almost without blinking. Truthfully, he didn't trust Sharon. After witnessing her nature over the last few days, how could he? For some reason Steve reached to touch the woman's elbow, trying to ease her crossed arms. Their conversation had seemed to get tense a moment ago.

With a glance in the rearview he caught Bucky looking at Chelsea, the woman just staring at the torn ceiling of the little car. "You alright back there?"

"I'm a little cramped actually, can you move the seat up?" The Winter Soldier replied.

"I wasn't talking to you. And no."

The woman's face cracked into a smile as she chuckled, "I'm fine, Sam."

"Fine?"

"Ok. I'm incredibly stressed." she corrected but continued to sort of smirk as she looked at Bucky, reaching out to prod him playfully, "But I'm happy right where I am for now."

"Should I give you two some space?"

"It wouldn't hurt."

The car door closing pulled Sharon and Steve's attention. Sam could only raise his hands in humorous defeat which actually made Steve smile.

Sharon could admit, as his blue eyes turned to hers, that things could be worse. She took her chance to lean forward and plant a firm kiss to his cheek.

"Good luck, Cap."

Sam didn't approach until the woman pulled off and he only stood quietly and waited for the captain to speak.

After a moment The Captain's smile fell, "I can't help but feel like i'm the reason they're like this."

The other man chuckled warmly and crossed his arms, "Not that i'm an expert on women or anything, but they don't seem like the type of women to fall apart over a man, even if it's you." Steve grinned a bit at that and Sam continued, "I'm sure the spy work got in the way too. They've known each other since childhood, man. Only they know how deep those wounds go. Some stuff just comes out with time."

The blonde looked over his shoulder to the small car. In the backseat, James Barnes smirked in amusement at a laughing Chelsea Jones. In that moment he saw his friend before the war; smooth and confident and happy.

And just like he understood why women chose him then, he understood it now. "Yeah. I guess it does."