Chapter Nine - Chasing Cars
The passing days, Liv is slowly emerging from the darkness. Brian is along for the ride, yet this time, Liv is riding shotgun. Five nights and four days ago, Liv wouldn't talk. She wouldn't eat. Now? Liv nibbles on Brian's cooking, take outs, and any little thing lingering in the fridge. She talks. Brian never presses her to talk about Lewis. Liv never mentions anything regarding Lewis. Their conversations consists of current events, music, sports, and mostly tv shows. Their biggest discussions are; Jordan vs. LeBron, the affordable health care plan (Obamacare), their favorite contestant on the American Diva series, and the Mets vs. the Yankees. Those topics may appear impersonal, but their passion and agreement for it brings them to an intimate level.
The passing days, Liv is feeling closer to Brian. All the while, Brian is trying to figure out how he's lived most of his life without Liv. He hasn't left the apartment at all during this time. He finds himself in a different realm. He's locked inside of his place with her, exploring more and more about one another. It's as if they're the only two people on earth.
Liv is still screening calls. She's becoming dependent on Brian. He's allowing himself to take care of her but not allowing himself to totally enable her desolated state. Brian is trying every trick in the book to bring Liv out of the darkness. He understands the process. He will not push her to smile. He will not push her to talk about her ordeal. However, he will push her to eat. He will push her to take her meds. He will push her to stay alive.
One night, he tricks her into, finally, eating. They were lying in bed around three a.m. Liv couldn't fall asleep and Brian couldn't stay awake. He agreed to stay awake if she watched him perfect linguine with shrimp and lemon oil. When he's done, he pours red wine for the two of them. Once Liv tasted the wine, her appetite was back. Wine always made her fairly hungry and Brian knew that all too well.
Liv didn't know how hungry she was until she dug into Brian's food. Brian found it very cute and rather funny. He was just relieved that she was eating again.
It was exactly a week ago, today. Seven days. Liv has been a survivor of William Lewis for seven days. She's doing really well. She's eating, sleeping, taking only two baths a day, talking more, occasional chuckles, taking the medicine she was prescribed, and even letting Brian wrap his arms around her as they cuddled in bed.
Today. Today is the day that Brian returns to work. He has to leave Liv all alone. Leaving her all alone wasn't the ticker. Considering to quit his job to be home with Liv is the real ticker. Brian knows he's falling even more in love with Liv and it's an overwhelming pleasure.
The morning is setting in and Liv is wide awake. She holds Brian's hands as he snores next to her side. She can't let go of his hand. Brian's hand is like a door that leads her out of the madness. The madness of everything Lewis. The madness of this world. Every night Liv falls asleep or either wake up to flashbacks and nightmares. If it gets to be too much, she squeezes his hands and that brings her back to reality. To security.
"I think I should call Diego. Get him to fill in for me today." Brian eyes are still close. That's the way Brian Cassidy normally wakes up when sleeping next to Liv. He could lie next to her forever, ignoring time and ignoring all things. Liv lets his hand go, snuggles her head into his chest, and allows him to kiss her forehead.
"Bri. You've already missed a week of work. You should go." Liv traces his lips with her fingers. She's close to him. So close. He knows to allow her all control when she displays any affection. He longs to kiss her but is terrified of her reaction. She's comfortable touching him. He would never hurt her. As close as she is to him, she knows that she can trust Brian. She loves how she can always hear the sound of his heart beating.
"Yea you're right but..." Brian takes a deep breath. "I kinda love it here right now ya know? You, me. No one else just us..." He hears his voice tremble as the words slip out of his mouth. "I love it, I love you I love it I love it all." Panic. Brian closes his eyes, once again he's placed his foot in his mouth. I love you? Really?
If Brian is looking for a response from Liv, he's going to be sadly disappointed. Did she hear him? Of course she heard him say I love you. Will she react? "Me too," Liv closes her eyes, blowing it off. How was she suppose to respond? There is too much on her plate right now to deal with the I love you's. That should be unspoken right?
Brian feels like he's been kicked in the gut. He's lost in the moment of awkwardness. However, in their Bensidy-styled way of relating, Brian gets up and heads out for work.
After Brian leaves, Liv plugs in the coffee maker. She's already decided how she's going to spend her first day alone. Her first day alone since Lewis got the drop on her... She would clean Brian's apartment spotlessly. The time she spends scrubbing and sweeping would be equivalent to the time Brian returns home.
Liv begins with the kitchen. She works her way into the living room next. She will save the bathroom for the final project. As she begins cleaning the bedroom, a knock on the door startles Liv.
To Be Continued...