Chapter Eighteen - Sincerely, William Lewis
I let you push me past the breaking point, I stood for, nothing, so I fell for everything. You held me down, but I got up hey. Already brushing off the dust. You hear my voice, you hear that sound. Like thunder gonna shake the ground. You held me down, but I got up.
"So your grandparents told me about you passing your driving test." Liv voice is cheery and hopeful.
"Mos def. You proud of me?"
"Mos def?" She lets out a sincere laugh. "Is that short for 'most definitely'?"
"Yea come on don't be lame."
"Well I am proud of you... Heard your mom is proud of you as well..." She watches as the smile fades away from his face.
"Doesn't matter what she is. What she isn't is my mother. You were more of a mother to me Olivia.. Hope you know that.. Anyways this is my party and I'm not gonna ruin it by talking about her. I'm 16 today. I'm a man now." His voice, once soft and highly pitched, is now deep and assertive. Benson smiles as she watches her former foster kid, Calvin Arliss, meet up with three out of 50+ friends at his sweet 16 bash.
The sun is setting perfectly as the night slowly creeps upon Calvin's grandparent's home. There is graffiti sprayed on the fence that locks the party inside of the spacious yard. Fresh face teenagers dance to the swagged-out and clearly 'faded' DJ's music. Get ready 'cause I've had enough. I see it all, I see it now.
Some kids are drinking punch from the tall fountain standing in the middle of yard. Maybe it's spiked. Maybe it isn't. The food table that was full hours ago, is now being used as a place to sit. Neon lights make way as the dark of the day arrives. The wind is blowing fiercely but teenage hormones keep the weather hot enough.
The teenagers are not the only ones having a great time. Calvin's grandfather is learning the 'Harlem Shake' by a group of girls and one very flamboyant guy. Calvin's grandmother is bringing out the foam machine with two other ladies appearing to be her age but strangely buff. Then there is Liv, making her way over to Cassidy, and an unknown male, perhaps a friend of Cassidy's. I got the eye of the tiger, a fighter, dancing through the fire. 'Cause I am a champion and you're gonna hear me roar. Louder, louder than a lion. 'Cause I am a champion and you're gonna hear me roar.
"Hey babe. You ready to get out of here?" Brian says as he wraps his arm around Liv's waist. A tingling feeling overwhelms Liv. It's comfort.
"Just about. I think they're getting ready to bring out the foam." She smiles at Brian and his friend. She doesn't know him and her suspicions are visible. "Hey, it's Liv," she says to avoid awkwardness as she nods her head. She holds out her hand, preparing for a hand shake.
"Oh right. How rude of me. Kev, this is Liv." Brian watches them shake hands.
"Finally I get to meet the lady who turned this douche into a man." Kevin's voice comes out high pitched. The music seems to get louder and louder.
"Hey, watch it now." Brian laughs.
"What? I think the man knows what he's talking about." Liv jumps in, chuckling from the Brian's brief roasting conversation.
"Oh you too?" Brian says to Liv, joining in on the laughter at his expense.
"Cassandra and I work down at the courthouse together. I'm a male clerk so to secure my manhood, I often tease this one." Kevin points to Brian. "About his femininity." He chuckles.
"You tell that to your husband when you get home every night Katie? Oh wait not your husband. I keep forgetting that's your mom under all that facial hair right.. Hey? She ever get that shaved?" Brian's comeback are defeating Kevin's fruitless insults. However, it is all fun. Kevin appears to be very entertained by Brian.
"Listen to this guy huh?" Kevin places his attention and focuses directly on Liv. "I hope you don't find this offensive but what the hell are you doing with this guy. You're a very beautiful woman." Kevin winks at Liv.
Brian intervenes when he feels Liv's body briefly tremble. "Kevin, here, lives next door. With his mom and his wives of cats."
"Don't believe him Olivia. He's just mad that I'm better looking than he is." Kevin concludes.
Brian fires back another friendly insult and the guys continue to bicker as Liv becomes their audience. She also watches the foam releasing from the machine. Her eyes fall onto Calvin. A rush of happiness comes upon her as she observes the smile on the boy's face. He's happy. He's very happy and that makes her happy.
Earlier in the week, Liv was shocked to see Calvin show up at Brian's with a dozen of red roses in his hand. The shock wasn't that he showed up. The shock was that he sprouted up. The last time she saw the boy, he was just a little skinny thing with messy blonde hair. So when he showed up at Brian's door, Liv initially thought that he was a stranger showing up at the wrong apartment.
Standing in the doorway, Liv inspects the tall and athletic built teen. He has a dozen of red roses in his hands. He wore a baseball cap but she saw the jet black and spiked hair underneath. She noticed the big smile on his face. It was a smile that said compassion and concern.
"Can I help you?" Liv asks.
The boy's smiling face turned. He cleared his throat. A look of puzzlement came across his face. "Olivia? It's me."
Liv is still not sure who he is. She waits a few moments to remember or try to piece it all together. Then, suddenly, she gazed into his eyes. It was then when she knew. "Calvin?"
Liv tunes out the friendly bickering that Brian and Kevin can't seem to quit. She focuses all her attention on Calvin. He's always wanted a foam party. She remembers those nights when both she and Calvin couldn't sleep. They would lie awake and think of ways to fall asleep. One night, Liv got up to do the dishes and Calvin used the bubbles as weapon in a water fight. After they got tired, they cleaned up, and decided to make the water fights a thing.
Liv watches Calvin for minutes before turning her attention back to Brian and Kevin. Surprisingly, they've changed their conversation, instead of bickering, they complain. They're complaining about the lousy hours and the lousy pay at the courthouse. Brian makes a comment that inspires Liv. "As long as I got her to come home to? I won't complain, right. Just riding it out, ya know." Brian comments about Kevin's non-love life. Kevin loves being a bachelor. It was then when Liv realized how much she's truly grateful to have Brian.
The three of them continue to make conversation through the loud music. For the first time in months, Liv feels normal. She feels like she's finally able to breathe and just be. It's like she's stuck in the Sahara desert and a gush of cool wind comes in from nowhere. It feels good. Her energy feels damn good.
Kevin finally leaves after almost an hour. Brian and Liv decide to leave as well. Liv isn't leaving without telling Calvin and his grandparents goodbye. The foam is making it really hard to find everyone. Brian agrees to find the grandparents and bid them goodnight. Liv decides to find Calvin and bid him goodnight. First, they call for a cab. Before they begin searching through teenage groping and foam, Brian and Liv agree to meet each other in the front yard.
Brian is the first to find his subjects. The grandparents thank him for attending Calvin's party and ask about Liv's recovery. Brian is vague. Calvin's grandma wants to arrange a dinner date with Brian and Liv. Brian agrees and the elderly couple says they'll call to hook it up. Brian thanks them and makes his way to the front yard.
Meanwhile, Liv searches for Calvin but is stopped by the vibrating phone tickling her hand. It's a text message. The text is sent from an unknown contact. Because she's a cop and have given her number to countless of victims, she doesn't find this at all odd. She opens the text and realizes it's a video. Curious, she clicks the play button. What she see paralyzes her...
For a moment, her legs turn to jelly but she manages to stand. She feels her body rattle. The neon lights that makes her white shirt glow is now shining directly on her and no one else. She doesn't notice. Her eyes are glued to that video. She hears nothing. She hears everything. Then, the music that played so loud minutes ago, now sounds so far away. Girl, take a seat. Rest your weary bones. Your secret's safe. In my hands. Benson may be headed for a grade A panic attack.
Brian is standing in the road. Their cab is here. He's been waiting for Liv for longer than he expected. He chops it up to Liv saying a long goodnight to Calvin. He admired her dedication to this kid. When he met Calvin earlier this week, Brian was shocked that Liv became his temporary mother. It was just another reason for why he loved her... He takes this time to listen to the music.
Light another cigarette. Burning in the cold. Waiting on the street. For your man. You're trying not to look so. Young and miserable. You gotta get your kicks. While you can.
As more time passes, Brian gets worried. The cab is ready to take off but just as he starts the engine, Liv appears. Brian notices that her demeanor has changed entirely. Her color has faded. He asks if she's fine and she agrees that she is fine, but, just really tired.
The cab ride is quiet. Brian makes comments but Liv doesn't bother to give any feedback. He tries to take her hand but she nearly jumps out of her skin. She's in a daze. They get to the apartment and Liv heads straight for the shower. Brian's nerves are in a pickle. He's afraid because she's acting the same way she did in the aftermath of William Lewis. What could have happened?
Brian fears are confirmed when he hears Liv, sobbing in the bathroom. She's been doing so well lately. Whatever happened, Brian is determined to get through to Liv. She has to let him in, she has to talk with him, she has to let him take care of her... That was the pact they made.
Brian locks the apartment door, grabs a beer from the fridge, and lounges on the sofa. He's waiting for Liv to come out of the bathroom. Suddenly, her cell begins to vibrate on the end table. Nick Amaro is calling. Brian answers. Nick is calling to check up on Liv. Brian assures Liv's partner that all is well. He tells Nick about the party and makes it appear as if Liv is 100% better. Nick makes the conversation brief as he ends it with, "you tell her to call me when she has time." Brian agrees.
As Brian ends the call, he notices Liv's screen is set on a video. Curious, Brian decides to watch. When he presses play, he immediately wishes he didn't.
Liv is in the back seat of an SUV. The camera is on her and she's cowered in a fetal position.
"No no no.. Let me see your beautiful face." Lewis grabs her chin roughly. He forces her to look into the camera, "Hi," he says. She takes a small and short breath before looking Lewis in the eyes. He lets her chin go. Lewis asks, "now I'm going to ask you a few questions and if you answer me, you get to live a little longer... but if you don't?... you get your own gun shove up your ass and believe me I will do it... " Liv submissively nods her head.
Lewis turns the camera on himself, "we're here with the intriguingly beautiful, intriguingly sexy detective Benson. The uptight and very tight, I might add, NYPD detective. She's going to answer some questions and not be a bitch about it." His voice tone comes out in seductive whispers.
Lewis turns the camera back on Liv. "Ok. First question. How are you feeling?"
She begins to sway, "oh-oh k.
"Good. Good girl.. On a scale from one to one hundred? How much pain are you in?"
Blinking, Liv answers, "T-ten." She's getting confused.
"Oh only ten? Want me to inflict more pain so you can say one hundred?"
"No," she says adamantly in one breath.
"What do you think of me? I mean... How great I must seem to you to be able to take you out of your own apartment? A tough lady like you? ... Am I the most dangerous criminal you've ever encountered?"
"Y-you got off. Cheated the sys-.. System.."
Lewis takes in a deep breath. "I take that as a yes... Now I've asked you before and I'm asking you now... Is my dick the biggest you ever did see?"
"If you... If you want me to stroke your ego ... What do you want?" Her voice comes out in a little girl's tone. Small pitched and innocently sound.
"Do you know how much it will hurt you baby? Huh? ...it's really bigger when it's hard... It can and it will hurt you.. So? How much do you think it will hurt?" His voice is eager.
Brian has tears pouring from his eyes. The rage will sneak upon him, much later and much unexpectedly. He's in a state of shock. He's paralyzed to the point where he doesn't even notice Liv standing behind him. "Turn it off." Liv's voice is calm. Brian looks up at her and watches as she sits in the recliner.
Brian is almost speechless. He doesn't realize it but his lips are moving. "Who sent this to you?"
She lets out a shaky sigh as her tears reform in her eyes. "Who do you think?" Liv shakes her head while staring Brian in the eyes. They stare at one another, not knowing what to do next...
Nowhere, else to go and you never know what to hide and what to show, no. You're holding on for life. Holding on for life, love. Holding on for love.
...
To Be Continued...