Disclaimer: NO.6 isn't mine and will never be. *sobs*

4. The New Resolve

I ambled aimlessly through the street, ensuring that I didn't bump into other people, with how unfocussed my eyes were and distracted my mind was. I could say I blended in pretty well with the crowd around me, though I guess my trousers were too shabby for this new city.

The sky was of a dull colour, the air was cool yet heavy. The people around me were mostly striding rather hurriedly, I guessed because it was right after working hours and they wanted to go home, to the people who were waiting for them.

After that incident two years ago, life crawled back to normal for everybody. Well, okay, I guess normal was an understatement, because it was close to massive change within—and outside—the city of No. 6.

Oh yes, the city is still called No. 6. The only difference was that now there was no more distinction between Chronos, Lost Town and also the four Districts surrounding it were now included in the city area. No more distinction was in terms of the treatment the people living in the different areas receive. Which was great, I thought, because it was exactly what he had desired. He had almost lost his life achieving that goal, and I applaud him for managing to destroy the wall —indirectly, since technically it hadn't been him who had done it—, while at the same time doubting if the destruction of the wall would really result in the condition that was currently taking shape, slowly yet surely.

Yes, that meant I was the loser at this bet.

Nevertheless, I felt a sense of pride in knowing that this realized dream was once his.

I sighed.

Am I really doing the right thing? Will I really be happy this way?

In my defense, this wasn't No. 6 that I had wanted to crush, anymore. I approved of this evolved city, and even though I still lived outside of the former No. 6 wall, I did go inside what used to be exclusively No. 6 without any feeling of grudge or discontent. In essence, my goal had been achieved, too.

But then…

Will he really be happy this way?

This scared me more than the previous question. What if, what if he didn't want me back?

What if my return brings him more pain than happiness?

I would be lying if I say I didn't observe him these past two years. I'd been monitoring his new life—how he had moved to his old home when I had met him the very first time, how he had entered university, how his mother had reopened her bakery at their home—and my observation had showed that he had been enjoying this new-found life.

To the outside eyes, what I could see was that he had found again what used to be his life before I had rescued him to the West District. I had seen him mingle with his new friends, pursue what he had been designed to do, and excel at it, too.

I didn't want to disrupt the equilibrium that he had struggled to achieve.

But I was a selfish person. I couldn't stand to suffer every single day, at not being able to feel his presence next to me, while he could smile and laugh together with his damned new friends.

I almost stomped my foot in frustration.

I raked my fingers through my untied hair. Yes, I had kept it long, but I didn't usually tie it up when I was out in the city. I didn't want a certain someone noticing me, walking around so near to where he was living, so easily. I didn't cut my hair either, contradictorily, hoping that a certain someone would by chance notice me, if he happened to see me walking around so near to where he was living.

Ironic, huh?

What a messed up life I'd been living after that stormy night six years ago.

Now, I lied about the ambling 'aimlessly' part earlier. I had a destination in my head. It was just that I wasn't one hundred percent sure that I wouldn't regret going to that place. I knew after I got there, there would be no turning back. Honestly, I had no idea—and honestly, I was scared to foretell—what was going to happen once I was there.

This was a plainly selfish whim of mine, and I had obeyed to it, thanks to this stupid emotion.

As I trudged up the deserted road I once travelled six years ago, it started to rain.

A/N: Another angsty chapter. I hope the next one won't be, though I couldn't promise hahaha thank you for reading and I look forward to reading your reviews! :)

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