Angel - Massive Attack

Shepard was the light in Tali's darkest day.

Her father was dead. She was up for exile from the flotilla for sending her father non-operational geth parts. Her name had been stripped from her. But here was Shepard, giving the Admiralty Board a piece of her mind for even thinking of exiling Tali.

And it was working. She saw the looks being exchanged between the Admirals, and barely heard their decision to not charge her over the rushing sound in her ears.

Today I lost my father, but I didn't lose my people. Keelah se'lai.

Shepard was soon by her side, asking if she wanted to stay or go back to the Normandy. She allowed her eyes to wander through her people, indecisive if she should stay among them or retreat to solidarity to succumb to her grief.

But there he was. Kal'Reegar. His mask was turned towards her, and she could tell he was as eager to see her as she was to see him.

"Shepard," she said gently, her eyes never leaving Kal. "Can I meet you back at the ship?"

Garrus and Shepard followed the line of Tali's sight, and Garrus let out a soft 'ooh'. "Of course," Shepard said gently. "Take your time. The Normandy will depart when you're ready."

A faint smile graced Tali's face, and she muttered "thank you" before making her way towards Kal'Reegar.

"Tali," Kal said, his voice full of relief at the sight of her. She pulled him into a tight embrace. If anyone had suspicions about their pairing before, they were just confirmed.

"Shepard sure has a way with words," he continued. "But I'm damn grateful for it right now. I'm sorry that I couldn't get a wave to you about your dad but they cut off all communication to the Normandy after they notified you of the trial."

"It's ok." Her voice was soft. "I'm just happy that my father's memory will remain honourable and that I can still call the flotilla home. How have things been here?"

"Quiet without you," he said as he took her forearms in his hands, "but otherwise things never change. I miss having you here."

"I miss you too, Kal. Shepard needs me, though. She's strong, but deep down, she's a little lost."

"I know you don't have much time," he began, "but I have something for you in my cabin. Will you come with me?"

She nodded emphatically as he grabbed her hand and led her out of the wide hall.

"How are you holding up, Tali?"

Shepard approached the quarian, who was bent over her computer, as usual. Instead of working, however, her eyes were only on her hands. Or rather, something in her hands.

"I will miss my father. I will think of him every day and honour his memory." Determination was in her voice when she looked up at Shepard. "He did this so that I could have my home world back. And dammit, Shepard, I'm going to fight to get that world back when this is over. For him, and for me."

Shepard pointed to her hands. "A gift from Kal'Reegar?"

Her hands opened to reveal a small chain with a golden washer laced through. "It's a washer. It sounds foolish, but the first time that we met I was working on a ship. I had taken this washer off to replace it with one that's a proper size. Normally we return any excess parts to the communal area, but he held onto it until now because it reminded him of me. Knowing that I won't be able to see him before we hit the Collector ship, he wanted me to have it." She laughed gently. "Do you mind putting it on for me?"

"Not at all."

Tali turned around and Shepard looped the chain around her neck and secured it. When Tali turned to face her again, the small washer rested proudly on her chest. "Humans like to give lavishly to their partners, showering them with gifts and expensive food. But quarians are a more frugal species. Our gifts are always homemade and from the heart." Tali grasped the washer and smiled. When she spoke again it was under her breath. "How are things with your turian?"

A girlish giggle came out of Shepard. "He's keeping me in one piece through everything, Tali. I'm so grateful for your encouragement and help with everything. He... makes me happy and makes me a better person at the same time."

"Do you love him?"

Shepard's eyes betrayed her surprise. "I don't know yet," she admitted.

"You'll know when the time is right," Tali said, resting her hand on Shepard's shoulder. "Today was right for me."

A gasp emitted from Shepard. "Tali! I'm so happy for you!" She pulled her quarian friend into a tight hug. "When this is all over, the four of us are going for dinner. Somewhere dextro and levo friendly."

"I'm sure Kal would love-"

Joker's voice over the intercom interrupted them. "Shepard, we need you up on the bridge."

Shepard dramatically rolled her eyes for Tali and muttered, "These guys won't give me five minutes of peace, I swear."

"I can hear you, Commander." She made a rude gesture at the intercom. "I can see you too, Commander."

"You and EDI need to get away from security vids for a bit," she grumbled. She bid goodbye to Tali and made her way to the elevator.

On the bridge, EDI explained that the IFF was installed and ready, but they would have to take a shuttle to their next mission while they test primary systems.

"Good thing we've already jumped through the Phoenix Massing relay. I'll get the ground crew to take the shuttle down. Don't get kidnapped by the Reapers while I'm gone," she joked.

After the Commander left, Joker turned to EDI. "She jokes, but I'm honestly a little worried."

"I will protect you, Jeff."

"Oh good," he muttered. "The computer will save me."

"Joker! Are you alright?"

Shepard jogged into the comm room and pulled out her omni-tool to scan Joker, her eyes full of concern.

"Other than the fact that I had to eat my words about the computer saving me, and the fact that I just had to watch the entire crew get dragged out of the ship, I'm a vision of health."

"Good work on saving the ship, Joker. You too, EDI." Shepard's eyes swept the room. "Miranda, Joker, stay here. Everyone else is dismissed."

Her eyes followed each crew member as they left the room, and she nodded at each of them in acknowledgement. When the room cleared, she turned to Miranda.

"We need to get our crew back. We need to attack the base."

"Shepard, are you sure? I know some of our ground team aren't entirely prepared for this. Don't we want to attack the base at full strength?"

"If we wait," Joker added, "we could lose all of our crew."

"They know what they signed up for," Miranda retorted. "Besides, we could go now and they could be dead already."

Shepard's eyes fell on her XO. "What if our decision to wait is the difference between them living and dying?"

Miranda pulled herself to her full height. "What if our decision to go is the difference between a member of your ground team living or dying?"

Shepard could feel the frustration in Miranda's voice. She pulled herself to her full height as well, towering over Miranda. Joker cowered at the tension between the two headstrong women. "I have faith in every member of my ground team to fight for themselves. My crew is defenseless, and I'm pretty damn sure the Collectors didn't drag them off our ship to offer them tea and biscuits."

"You may have faith in your ground crew, but they don't have faith in you! Why would they trust the leadership of someone in a suicide mission who can't die? You could make more dangerous calls than necessary and put their lives at risk. They're scared, Shepard. I can see it in their eyes when I speak to them. There should be confidence, not fear."

"What would you suggest that I do then, Lawson?" Her voice was dripping with sarcasm. "Let you lead them?"

"I'm suggesting that we improve your ground team's morale before we ask them to potentially throw their lives away!"

Shepard took a step back, a scowl on her face. "Leave us, Joker." Grateful to avoid the attention, the pilot limped out of the room. Shepard took a series of deep breaths, her voice more calm when she spoke. "You're my friend, Miranda. As well as my XO. I trust and respect your judgment, which is why I asked you to say and discuss this matter with me. If you're so concerned with the morale of the ground team, maybe you should be concerned with the morale of your Commander. I won't be able to complete missions with the thought of my crew being tortured, killed, or worse by the Collectors."

Silence fell on the room. "You can't save everyone, Commander."

"I can try."

"You could be throwing one life away for another. Is that really what you want to do?"

"I trust my ground team to get the job done."

Miranda pushed her forefinger into Shepard's chest and looked deep into her eyes, a scowl forming on her lips. "Maybe if you weren't so busy with your turian lover you'd see that your team doesn't trust you."

She whipped around and stormed out of the room, leaving a dismayed Shepard in her wake.