Four readied the room for the second stage of initiation. He was glad to be past fighting but if that stage taught him anything, he needed to stay alert for any hint of divergence or trouble among this group. He was already watching Peter closer due to the knife incident but he seems to have calmed down after becoming number one. He was glad that Tris had become friends with the Dauntless born, there were more people out there to protect her while they all wait together. Also, he was worried her transfer friends were not as loyal as he had hoped initially.
They all line up in the hallway and Four asked them to take a seat. "From now on, you will all be training together. One by one you will enter the room with me to face your fears." With that he calls Uriah into the room.
As he is administering the test, he realizes Uriah is Divergent, but he must know he is because he is very smart about it. He hides it well and Four doesn't even have to adjust his results. "You did well in there. You thought quickly but smartly." Uriah gave him a knowing look, understanding what he was referring to and breathed a sigh of relief that he won't be discovered. "Just keep up what you are doing and you will be fine." Four walks him out and calls Lynn in.
He proceeds with Lynn's test and the next group of initiates were a blur until he reached Tris' name. He calls her name and leads her into the room. He feels her immediately recoil at the sight of the machine and that movement alone confirms she is Divergent. They are the only ones who fear the chair and what could possibly come with it. "Sit." Four says as he pushes her forward. "What's the simulation?" He can hear the nerves in her voice. "You will face your fears, this simulation is going to teach you to control your emotions in the midst of a frightening situation." He sees Tris drag herself to the chair and sit down hesitantly, wanting anything more in the world than to give her a hug and let her know he will protect her. "Do you ever administer Aptitude tests?" As he looks in her eyes, he finds himself bristle to cover up the emotions he doesn't want to show through in his. "No, I try to avoid Stiffs as much as possible." "Why" "Do you ask me that because you think I'll answer?" Four hates that he has to be rude to her but it's the only way he's found to hide his feelings. Being alone with her in this room tempts him to give in but the camera in the corner has him decide otherwise.
He brushes the hair away from her neck and he feels her tense. He knows he is giving her mixed signals, harsh words and gentle touches and it confuses him just as much. She looks at what he is holding and her eyes widen at the sight of the syringe filled with the simulation serum. "An injection?" she asks. "We use a more advanced version of the simulation here. No wires or electrodes for you." "Well, how does it work without the wire?" He wants to stop her from being so curious; it is an Erudite trait she needs to suppress, assuming that is one of the factions she had an aptitude for. "Well I have wires so I can see what is going on. You get a tiny transmitter in the serum that sends the computer images of what you see.
With that, he eases the tip of the needle into her neck. He sees the pain on her face and can't help but try to ease that if possible. "The serum will go into effect in sixty seconds. This will be different than what you experienced before, you will be drawn into a hallucination. It is your job to stay in the hallucination until you are able to calm your heart rate and breathing down to normal." With that, Four saw her eyelids begin to blink slower and before she went completely under, he grabbed her head and whispered, "Be brave Tris. The first time is always the hardest." The last thing he sees is her piercing eyes as she goes under.
On the screen, he sees her in a field that has a fire burning nearby. All of a sudden, a crow lands on her shoulder. He sees her eyes widen in panic and hit the crow. 'Breathe Tris, slow down your breathing and it will go away,' he thinks. But she doesn't, she gives in to the panic, crying out and beating the crow with both hands. Four feels his hands jerk as if to reach out to her to help but she is even beyond his help right now. He sees more crows descend on her and he feels his heart rate speed up watching her panic. She beings to scream out and he knows she doesn't remember a word he said. Then all of a sudden, something changes. He watches her begin to control her breathing and lay down on the ground, stretching out fully, allowing the crows to completely cover her body. As her heart rate slows, she gets pulled out of the simulation but in her mind she is still in it. Four watches her open her eyes to the sight of the metal chair but doesn't know where she is. She panics slightly thinking the birds are still there but quickly realizes they aren't. Four touches her shoulder to bring her back to reality and she throws a punch at him. "It's ok, it's over," he reassures her. He moves his hand to stroke her hair, pushing the physical contact a little too far, praying no one is watching the camera right now. She is not calming down like she should and Four wants to remove the fear for her. "Tris, I'm going to take you back to the dorms ok?" "No! They can't see me like this!" Four understands not wanting to look weak and reassures her, "Ok I"ll let you out the back door then." She tries to tell him she doesn't need him but he can't let her out of his sight just yet. "Nonsense." Four grabs her arm and walks with her down a hallway. He wants to talk but isn't sure if she is up for it yet.
Finally she turns to him and he can see the anger on her face. "Why did you do that to me? What was the point?" Four takes a deep breath and asks calmly, "Did you think overcoming your fears would be easy?" She yells back, "This isn't overcoming cowardice, cowardice is how you decide to be in real life. I am not getting pecked apart by crows in real life Four!" He smirks at her anger but then sees her cover her face. He hears her sob and again feels the overwhelming desire to wrap her up in his arms and take away that pain. He hears her mutter weakly, "I want to go home." He knows the feeling, remembering how awful his first time was but has to keep her from breaking.
"Learning how to be strong and think in the midst of fear is a lesson everyone, even Stiffs, need to learn. That's what we're trying to teach you and if you can't learn it you better leave because you won't make it here." Four watches her face carefully and sees the exhaustion taking over. "I'm trying but I'm failing." Her lip trembles and Four's heart breaks at the sight of her emotions. He has only seen her be strong and has gotten used to being able to push her. He forgot she was just a girl who had recently left behind the entire world she knew. He realized she didn't understand just how good she was here.
"Tris. How long do you think you were in there?" He watches her think it over and reply, "30 minutes?" He smiles, "Three minutes. You got out three times faster than the other initiates. You are not a failure, whatever you are. Tomorrow you will be better." He watches her face fall, "Tomorrow?"
Four puts his hand on her back and guides her towards her dorm, wanting nothing more than to take her back to his apartment but again realizing it's not the time, although that time is approaching much faster than he thought. As they get closer she turns and asks him the one question he can't answer right now. "What was your first hallucination?" "It wasn't a 'what' but more of a 'who' but it's not important." "Are you over that fear?" "Not yet." They reach the door and Four leans against the wall smashing his hands in his pockets so he won't do anything foolish like grab her face and kiss her which was all he thought about since she woke up from the simulation. "I may never be."
Tris looks at him curiously, "So they don't go away?" He fears that every time he enters his fear landscape and so far that is true. But he can't tell her that, he has to give her hope, so he tells a partial lie. "Sometimes they do but sometimes those fears are replaced by new ones. I don't think you can become fearless but if you can learn how to control it, how to be free from it, you will succeed at this stage." He sees her thinking deeply and continues wanting to reassure her as much as possible. He smiles warmly at her and he watches her return that smile. "Your fears are rarely what they appear to be in the simulation. Are you afraid of crows in real life, do you run away screaming when you see one?" She smiles and responds with a strong "No" and Four continues, enjoying this time, pretending they are just a girl and boy talking, getting to know one another. He feels her step closer to him and his breath stops. 'Does she feel the same way?' He watches her second guess her decision but then hold strong. He enjoys the feeling of her so close to him. She moves her body so she can lean against the wall and she was so close, Four could reach out and touch her if he was brave enough. She looked up at him, "So what am I really afraid of?" He can barely concentrate on her question as she leans toward him. One quick movement and their lips would touch. He barely whispers, "I don't know, only you know that." "I didn't think Dauntless would be this difficult to join." He is surprised she is so open with him but it's something he loves. They were growing closer together, learning more about one another, becoming more comfortable with less space between them.
"It wasn't always like this I'm told. Being Dauntless, it has shifted when the leadership changed. Six years ago, Max adjusted the training methods to be more competitive and brutal, disguising it as testing initiates strength. And I'm sure you already know who the next protégé is?" Tris looked up at him and had the same thought as Four, Eric. Four knew he had somehow survived their training, escaped the brutality, fought against it as hard as he could, but Eric reveled in it. "So if you were first in your class, what rank was Eric's?" Four just smiled at her, she was so curious, it was one thing he really liked about her. "Second." He knew she could come to the conclusion even as she was asking the question, "So you were their first choice? He was their second?" He wanted to know her thinking, get inside her brain. "What makes you say that?" "Well I saw how he was at dinner and I felt like he was threatened by you." Four didn't say anything, she was exactly right and the situation with Eric was something he struggled with on a daily basis.
He could tell she wanted to ask him more and he would have shared any answers with her that she asked of him right now. She had him fully under her power and there was no resisting her anymore. She held back and he knew this was because he was so private in front of everyone. He hoped one day they could be open with each other and he could finally tell someone the secrets that threatened to break him some days. "Do I look like I've been crying?" she asked him. He studied her face and, narrowing his eyes, leaned in close. He couldn't hold it in any longer and a smile took over his face. This was the effect she had on him. "No Tris, you look tough as nails."