Autumn Tree - Milo Greene
It was late into the evening, and the only sounds in Shepard's cabin were the soft, repetitive drumming of her fingers as she composed the long-winded Rannoch mission report for Admiral Hackett and the clicks from Garrus's talons against her keyboard as he perused her messages.
The clicks stopped without warning and Garrus's eyes went fearfully wide as he read and re-read one of the messages, his brow plates turning down when he realized just what it meant.
ANN Alert: New Article on "Quarian Fleet"
Palaven - The Turian Hierarchy, one of the most powerful and respected ground forces in the galaxy, are today paying respects to an unlikely ally: the marines of the Quarian Fleet.
The weakened immune systems of quarians normally means their forces are restricted to ships. But when an emergency technical team was required to repair a ground-based com relay, providing vital intel to the turian military, one quarian squad stepped up.
Commanded by squad leader Kal'Reegar, the quarian team repaired the com system, then sacrificed their lives holding the position until krogan troops arrived.
When turian troops offered to provide evac support, Reegar refused, insisting they could not risk the relay falling. He said multiple breaches to their exo-suits made evacuation impossible.
"We're all dead anyway," Reegar reportedly said. "Just make them pay for it."
A spokesman for Primarch Victus praised the squad's bravery.
"Whatever our past politics, today the galaxy stands together against a single threat," Victus said. "We are humbled by the sacrifice of our allies from Rannoch, and we promise to return the honor."
"Shit," he growled.
"What is it, Garrus?" Shepard called from the couch.
"You need to come take a look at this."
She stood behind him, resting her hands on his shoulders while her eyes darted across the message. Her expression fell into further desolation as she read it, her thoughts also punctuated by the word "Shit".
"Tali," they said simultaneously.
"We have to tell her," Shepard said. "She needs to know."
"Do you want me to-"
"Don't be ridiculous," Shepard interrupted. "I'll go tell her."
"Now? It's 0140 hours."
"If I was her, I would want to know." She kissed his forehead, threw her hoodie on over her tank top and swiftly exited.
Wanting to grab a ration bar and a canteen of water for Tali, she stepped out of the elevator at the crew deck. She was astonished to find that Tali was already sitting in the mess, facing the med bay with her hands wrapped around a mug with a straw. Shepard stopped in the doorway when she didn't acknowledge Shepard's entrance, or even move for that matter, until she spoke in an unusual monotone. "You've come to give me bad news."
No use lying to her, Shepard thought. "Yes."
Tali lifted the mug so the straw almost reached her visor; and then, remembering that the coffee was cold, she lowered it again. "It's about Kal," she whispered.
"How did you know?"
It made Shepard's spine tingle to hear Tali speak without moving a muscle, or without her voice betraying a slight intonation. "I was running diagnostics on the drive core tonight when I suddenly grew very tired. I thought that the excitement from our recapture of Rannoch was wearing off, so I went to lie down in bed and fell asleep immediately, without sanitizing or having something to drink. The moment I was asleep, I was in the most vivid dream of my entire lifetime. I was back on the Neema - the ship that I was accepted onto after my Pilgrimage - and I was in the engine room. We must have been in FTL travel because the drive core was working at full capacity, whirring away and emitting that turquoise glow in the otherwise pitch black room. I realized it was a dream when I reached up to touch my visor and it wasn't there; I was completely out of my enviro suit, wearing the most beautiful dress I've ever seen, bright yellow and strapless adorned with lace." Her hand ghosted up to touch her visor, affirming its presence, before she continued. "I thought I was alone in the dream - I couldn't hear any voices or evidence of other ship inhabitants - but suddenly, Kal was there with me. He was out of his suit as well, and I've never seen a man who looked more handsome. He was wearing a full formal suit, and he smiled at me, and it was like looking into the brightest and most beautiful star. But the smile didn't touch his eyes, and I could see something was wrong, but before I could ask, he spoke to me. 'I love you, Tali'Zorah' he said. So of course, I said 'I love you, Kal'Reegar. I wear your gift every day'. And he said, 'I know. I want you to know that you're the best thing that's ever happened to me, Tali. My life before I met you was a smattering of duty, loyalty, and war. You were the peace to the conflict of my life, the sweet to counteract the sour, the reason why I leapt excited out of bed instead of resenting each day. I'm incredibly proud of all your accomplishments, personally and for the quarian people. My only regret in life is never spending more time with you'." She took a long, deep inhale to collect herself before continuing. "I asked him why he was talking like that, since he has come to me in my dreams many times before but we always spoke in the present tense, not in the past tense. He told me… he said, 'My time in this life is finished, I gave it saving the lives of many people. I wanted to say goodbye to you before I joined my ancestors'. He embraced me, and when I opened my eyes, he was gone." The emotion welled up and spilled over, and she rested her mask on the table before beginning to openly weep, her body shaking with racking sobs, each inhale coming in broken gasps and each exhale accompanied with a cry of anguish.
Shepard leapt into action, immediately taking a seat beside her ailing friend and rubbing her back, whispering words of comfort that sounded false even to her.
There were no words of comfort that could heal the wound of a lost mate.
Tali reached up and held onto Shepard's shoulders while resting her face on her chest, her body convulsing as she let the grief over take her. Shepard's words of comfort felt too hollow so she lapsed into silence, wrapping her arm around Tali's narrow shoulders.
When Tali's breath had steadied and she began to hiccup in recovery, Shepard gently suggested, "Why don't we have a girl's night in my cabin? We'll kick Garrus out, steal those dextro chocolates that Dr. Michel bought him, and watch a vid?"
Tali sniffled. "That would be nice. I don't want to be alone when I sleep."
Shepard grabbed her hand, weaving her five fingers through Tali's three, and walked her to the elevator, never letting go until they reached her cabin.
Garrus sat up quickly when he heard the door open, his expression openly filled with compassion as he saw the slumped-over Tali, anchored by the hand of Zoey. "Garrus," she said quietly, "Do you mind pulling a night in the main battery? Tali-"
He held his hand up to indicate that no further explanation was necessary, and he pulled together his few things and left. He skipped his normal display of affection in lieu of a simple nod, considering the effects it could have on Tali. When he left, Shepard propped Tali up on the bed, pulled two boxes of chocolate out of the fridge (one dextro, one levo), and took a seat next to her. "I'll play you one of my favourite old human vids," she said, prepping it on her personal vid screen. "It'll give you an idea of what humans thought that aliens looked like before we ran across the turians."
She played Star Wars: A New Hope, and was not offended - relieved, in fact - when Tali let out a soft snore before Luke even left Tatooine. She turned off the vid, tucked her in, curled up on the couch, and quickly fell asleep herself.
Tali woke slowly the following morning, refusing to open her eyes even as the light flooded in. She hoped beyond all hope that everything last night had been a horrible nightmare; but when she heard Garrus and Shepard's hushed voices, she knew it was not.
"How's she holding up?"
"She slept through the night with no nightmares. She's broken, but she's not beaten. I know my Tali, she's too tough for that.
"Come on, we have to suit up for Kallini. I'll just take EDI instead, and I'll make sure Liara checks up on her today."
Tali heard the door swoosh open and closed before turning over to check the clock: 1018 hours. Yet she was still tired, tired beyond belief, so she fell back into a dreamless sleep.
She awoke briefly, mid way through the day, to a delicate touch caressing her arm.
"Hey there," Liara whispered.
"I'm so tired, I need to sleep for a bit longer."
"Of course. If you need anything, just shout for EDI and she'll call me."
"Thank you."
"She's still sleeping?"
"Leave her be, Garrus, we all have our ways of coping."
"She's been sleeping for over sixteen-"
"Shh. Let's go down to the cargo bay. I'll have EDI call us when she wakes."
When Tali's eyes finally fluttered open again, they were deep into the night cycle. She sat up from bed and saw Shepard sprawled across the couch, a string of drool escaping comically from the corner of her mouth. Her stomach growled angrily so she stood on stiff legs and made her way to the mess.
When she walked in, Ashley was sitting at a table, a mug of hot coffee in her hand while her eyes darted across a data pad. "Hey, Tali! How... how are you doing?"
Word must have spread fast. "I think I'm ok. Not good, but ok."
"That's great to hear. I heard you got a good sleep in."
That elicited a small chuckle from Tali, who poured a glass of water and took a long sip. She heard Ashley stand and was slightly surprised when she pulled her in for a tight hug. "You're in a ship full of people who care about you. Losing someone is hard, but we're always here to support you."
Tali swallowed down tears. "The Normandy crew is what's keeping me going. Thank you."
It was true. Everyone worked hard to bring her spirits up: the women showed her affection and caring, the men told her bad jokes to keep her mind off of things.
Shepard completed a long string of missions - she investigated the Ardat-Yakshi monastery and saved Samara's life, she rescued a group of Ex-Cerberus scientists on Arrae, she investigated Leviathan reports, she restored an Alliance fuel depot, and she retrieved countless trinkets for Citadel citizens - and within a couple of weeks, Tali was back on the ground with her and beginning to return to her old self.