After they split up, Four took some time to analyze what happened with them. He realized that Tris felt something for him and that made him very happy. He also realized they can't move forward the same way they have been, something has to break, they've been too close, shared too many emotional situations together. The last thing he realized was that he wanted to be completely honest with her, no more secrets.
He took the next day to prepare, going through everything he has in his mind, deciding where to start. He formed a plan, how he's going to get her alone. He asks Zeke to go scouting for him, find out where she is. He can only see her at the right moment or he will spill everything wherever she is. Zeke comes back and says she is at the chasm with Christina and Will, dropping in those awful reports Erudite has released about Abnegation. Just one more thing she has to endure, her old faction being dragged through the mud by Erudite, her brother's new faction. Four thanks Zeke and heads out, knowing where he is going to take her and what he is going to do.
Four is waiting in the hallway near them, wanting to get this timing just right. He wants her to see him without him approaching them. He hears Christina say they should head to bed so he steps out and walks toward the ladder that goes into the glass ceiling. He heads straight up the ladder, assuming Tris will follow if she sees him. As he is ascending, he hears her tell them she has to talk to me, he knew she would follow, especially after last night. Their relationship shifted after holding each other so intimately last night, they felt a pull toward each other, at least Four did, but he assumed Tris did as well.
He heard her feet on the ladder and smiled, excited to take the next step forward. He knows mostly curiosity has brought her up the ladder, but all he needs is her up here. He sees her running to catch up with him, breathless, cheeks flushed. He stands outside the door to the fear landscape room, intending on showing her why he is here and where he came from.
"Since you are here, you might as well come in with me," he says acting surprised, even though that was his plan all along. He sees Tris hesitate, "Into your fear landscape? I can do that?" "Yes." With that Four turns and walks into the room and she follows immediately. "The serum connects you to the program but the program decides which landscape to go through. It's currently set up for mine." Her eyes looked surprised that he is finally letting her in, after all this time. She asks hesitantly, "You would let me see that?" He smiles at her, glad to hear the excitement hidden in her voice. "Why else do you think I'm going in? I have some things I want to show you."
Four pulls out the syringe and Tris automatically tilts her head for him. He brushes her neck and sticks in the needle as gently as possible, yet she still winces. Four wants this to be completely about trust, so he hands her the box with the other syringe, offering to let her inject him. Her eyes widen at the trust as she grabs the syringe. "I've never done this before," she says as she takes it out of the box. Four motions for the spot on his neck and he watches her stand on her tiptoes to inject the serum. He's done this so many times he doesn't even flinch, but just stares into her eyes as she finishes. Four holds out his hand for Tris and relishes the feeling of her fingers sliding between his. They enter the room and Four turns back to her just before the serum takes effect. "See if you can find out why they call me Four." Tris tilts her head at this comment and asks, "What's your real name?" Four smirks, she is so insatiable when it comes to information, one thing isn't good enough for her. Lucky for her, he plans on sharing everything that makes him the person he is with her tonight. "See if you can figure that out too."
Four feels the simulation take over and closes his eyes as the ground leaves him. As the air becomes stronger, Four's body becomes enveloped in fear and it's all he can do to stand. He removes his hand from Tris' and instead wraps his arm around her, using her to ground his thoughts. She kept his fear away on the Ferris wheel and she can do it again here. He has trouble breathing so he squeezes her tighter to him. He opens his eyes to look at Tris and her face is filled with wonder at the view but all he can see is her. She turns to him, "We have to jump off don't we." Four just nods. "Ok, on three, ready?" Tris counts down and leaps off, pulling him with her, and just as they are about to hit the ground, the simulation has moved on. He has never conquered the heights fear that fast, she is just what he needed.
They hit the ground and before Four can answer Tris as to what is next, the walls close in. He feels Tris push into him as the walls snap shut. The space becomes very narrow and Four has to pull his arms into this chest to find enough space. As the ceiling slams on, the space is only big enough for Four yet Tris is smashed in here with him as well. Four can't breathe, the extra body in here takes up the space he would normally us to calm down. Tris must notice his inability to breathe. She reaches out for him, "It's okay, here-" She grabs his arms and guides them around her body and now he is unable to breathe for two reasons. Four melts into her, clutching at her back and pressing his face close to hears. He feels her cheeks grow hot and knows his body is reacting the same way. "This is the first time I'm glad I'm so small," she laughs, breaking the tension. Four can't even answer her, between the fear of confinement and Tris being so close, he has lost his voice.
He can see Tris analyzing him and finally she speaks very calmly, "We can't break out of this one so we are going to have to face it. We need to let the space get as small as possible, making it worse will make it better right?" She looks at him and he whispers, "Yes." "Let's crouch then." Tris squeezes his waist, signaling him to slide down with her and he flinches as the walls slide in another inch. Tris' mind is clearer than his so he lets her do all the moving and adjusting. She turns her body and rolls up in a ball and wraps his body around her, their limbs intermixing. Four can barely breathe as the walls move in even closer and he becomes very aware of how close Tris is to him. "This is worse, so much worse." Tris shushes him and says, "It's ok, just put your arms around me." He slips his arms around her, not arguing, and slides closer to her.
"Four, the simulation is responding to you. It's not moving on because your heart is still pounding. You need to calm it down." He has no idea how to do that. Between being in the smallest space he has ever been and having Tris so close, his heart will never stop pounding. His face is close to her ear so he whispers, "It's that easy huh?" He hears her breathing become ragged but a smile stretches across her face. "Most boys would enjoy being trapped so close with a girl." As she says it she looks in his eyes and he's sure she knows how he feels. Unfortunately, he would rather be this close to her in any other situation. "Not claustrophobic people Tris!" She responds to his outburst by grabbing his hand and placing it over her heart, dangerously close to other parts of her body he has dreamed about. "Feel my heartbeat, can you feel it?" Four is in disbelief she is this comfortable with his hands on her. "Yes." He feels his heartbeat pick up pace as she tells him, "Feel how steady mine is?" Tris asks. Four responds sarcastically, because her heart beat is not slow at all, "It's racing Tris." She responds immediately, "Well that has nothing to do with the box."
He sees her wince, having revealed too many feelings, and his heart soars. She just admitted to what he has been hoping for all these weeks. "Every time you feel me breath, I want you to breathe." "Ok." He closes his eyes and focuses on her breath, the rising and falling of her chest. They are breathing steady when she asks him the next question. "Where does this fear come from? Maybe it will help to talk about it." Four takes a deep breath, getting ready to reveal the secrets he's held onto for so long. "It's from my childhood, one of the many punishments that made my childhood so fantastic. The tiny closet upstairs was like a prison for me." That is all Four can reveal at this point, the fear taking up too much of his mental abilities.
Tris takes a deep breath, "Ok, let's talk about something else. Ask me anything." Four matches her deep breath and prepares himself for the answer he doesn't want to hear but hopes for the one he's been waiting to hear for so long. "Why is your heart racing Tris?"
He sees her take another deep breath, "Well, I….I barely know you. I barely know you and I'm crammed up against you in a box, Four. What do you think?" She just admitted it, maybe didn't say it out loud but he knows now that she has feelings for him. Four takes a deep breath and asks another question, "If we were in your fear landscape, would I be in it?" Tris quickly answers, "I'm not afraid of you."
Four answers back just as quickly, "Of course you aren't. But that's not what I meant." He laughs again, and the walls break apart, leaving them in a circle of light. Four sighs and lifts his arms from her body, sad that moment is over but glad to be out of the box. His body feels cold from where hers was pressed against him and he misses the absence already. "Good thing you didn't get Candor on your test, you are a terrible liar," he jokes with her. She turned to face him with a smile on her face, "My aptitude test ruled out Candor really quickly, my lying was never an issue."
Four was taken aback, basically she just admitted to him she was Divergent. "The aptitude test tells you nothing." She gave him a curious glance, "Your test results weren't Dauntless?" Four feels his heart start to pound again and knows this is another moment to tell the truth, trust her with his secrets. "Not exactly, I…" before he can finish, he sees her over Tris' shoulder. The woman that is always in his landscape, the moment he dreads the most. Tris sees he is distracted and turns to follow his eyes. The woman has a gun pointed at them and Four immediately steps in front of Tris. He is standing next to the table with the gun on it and he gingerly picks it up. Tris realizes this fear, "You have to kill her?"
"Every single time. Even though I know she isn't real, she looks real and it feels real." Four picks up the gun, dread filling him, as he raises the gun to point at her head. He closes an eye, squeezes the trigger, sets down the gun and moves on quickly. The last fear is the one he has been the most nervous about showing Tris but there is no going back now. After this moment she will know who he is and he hopes she doesn't pity him like all the others who have found out his identity. He has become stronger because of it, not weaker. "Here we go," he mutters.
Four sees the dark figure moving ahead of them and takes a deep breath. He emerges in his grey clothes and Four sees Tris realize his deepest fear and secret as fear fills him. "Marcus," she whispers and looks at him for an explanation. He says one simple sentence that reveals it all to her, "Here's where you learn my name." Tris looks surprised but before she can say anything, Marcus speaks his name. "Tobias." Tris gasps as he pulls the belt from behind his back. Marcus continues, saying the words Four has grown to hate, "This is for your own good."
Four feels himself transform into the small boy he was when his father used to beat him, mentally slipping back into that time of his life before he learned to defend himself. As soon as Marcus steps toward him, a dozen more appear and Four loses all sight of Tris, forgetting she is even there. All that fills him is the fear of the belt, fear of the beating that is for sure to come. This is his greatest weakness and she is experiencing it first hand. He sees the belt raise in the air and throws his arms up to protect himself. Four waits for the stinging pain of the belt but never feels it. He opens his eyes to see her body standing in front of him, shielding him from the blow. The welt appears on her arm but he sees she has taken Marcus' belt. She turns on him, striking him with the belt and as Four watches Marcus lunge at Tris, something awakens in him. It's not the typical protection he feels whenever she is in danger it's more than that. It's a need, coursing through his entire body, to keep her away from him at all costs, to never let her experience the terror that is his father. Four stands, pushes Tris behind him, and stares Marcus down. All at once the Marcus' vanish and they are standing in the landscape room, having completed his cycle.
Tris looks at him in disbelief, putting all the pieces together as Four waits for her to speak. He's revealed his whole self to her and he has nothing he can say right now, it's up to her how she is going to react to it. She quietly says, "That's it? Those were your worst fears, there were only four…" She stops and looks him in the eye, understanding where his name came from, looking at him with the strangest expression. He smiles back at her wanting, with every part of his being, for her to accept him for who he is. He feels so exposed, so vulnerable, he never put any thought into what it would feel like if she rejected him, didn't accept who he was. He realizes she isn't looking at him in pity but in awe, respectfully admiring the man who is standing in front of her and it's all he can do to contain himself. He walks over and grabs her elbow, pulling her toward him. He needs her in his arms right now, needs to continue on the path they are headed down. This is the time, he feels it.
He brushes his lips against her cheek and he tightens his grip on her. His body is so overcome with emotion, from facing his fears in the landscape, to revealing all his secrets to her, and finally to having her accept him, his brain is overwhelmed with the situation. He buries his face in her neck, relaxing there, enjoying their closeness. She loops her arms around him and whispers in his ear, "It's over, we got through it." He pulls back and looks at her, sliding his fingers through her hair tucking it behind her ear. He stares contently into her eyes, fingers still moving through her hair. Four breathes her in deeply and releases the emotion inside of him. "You got me through it, you were brave."
Tris' eyes match the passion in his and she replies to him, "It's easy to be brave when they aren't my fears." Four hears the admiration in her voice and knows he can't let her out of his company tonight, he wants to stay by her. He moves away from her but keeps a tight grip on her hand, not letting her slip away tonight. "Come on," he says, "I have something else to show you." With that Four leads her toward the Pit, wanting to reveal one more thing to her that he's kept to himself for so long.